The 12 Day Wellness Journey in the New Year

See Day 1 Here.

Each new year offers the promise of a fresh start. As we embark on this journey into the Wood Dragon Year 2024, it is the perfect time to cleanse not only our bodies but also our emotions, minds, and homes. In fact, I’m New Year’s cleaning today as we speak! I recall asking a Dharma question to a teacher a number of years back, I asked-“how do you get yourself feeling better if you feel a lot of heaviness, sadness or depression?” I mentioned that I often have a lot of negative self talk, and my spiritual tradition has so many steep stages of purification and levels of enlightenment that to me, often sound daunting and exhausting. What I learned from child raising, it helps more to focus on strengths and be encouraging rather than be critical and fixate on shortcomings. The teacher replied to my question simply-“Connect to the freshness.”

This was a very powerful and simple transmission for me, and those four pith words remain etched in my heart. Oftentimes we have these grandiose notions of some well-being, happiness and some ever future ideal notion of accomplishment, that’s always just out of reach.

However, every morning we wake up and basically our life takes place in simple ordinary moments of experience. We go to sleep and wake up, brush our teeth, make some breakfast, meditate (hopefully), do some stretching, bathe, go for a walk, start our day, and every day, repeat. All we really have are these simple elements of human experience tied together, the past is gone and future is but a dream. As you remember the old Ram Dass famous quote- be in the moment, “Be Here Now.” What then, is really being here?

 

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In my dharma tradition they talk about “Ordinary Magic.” Maybe the greatest attainment of all would be for us to really be raw, unfiltered and present in these little moments of our lives. I have a tendency to “future trip” or numb-checkout into Iphone/Facebook/Instagram/Reddit/X electric dissociation stupor, when indeed, the real heart connectedness is right here, in front of me. Can I really show up and be present in my life?

Recently, I was doing a group meditation weekend and it was raining and I was wearing dark wool, winter pea-coat. We went out for a walk during the lunch break and a few round raindrops were on my lapel. The sun was shining through the rain, and as I looked down and I saw a few perfectly refracted rainbows in the little drops of water. I thought to myself… This is it! My whole life has been leading up to this very moment- on this Sunday afternoon, for me to just fully experience these little sun-lit rainbows on my jacket. That was it- simple, unadorned, magic and the experience thereof, even bliss.

So, in a world flooded with detox and wellness advice, I think finding our authentic Selves and being present in each moment of our lives IS the spiritual path. It is all we have, really. Slowing down and opening is self care, rejuvenation and reconnecting again and again to the freshness. If we can take 30 minutes a day, to connect to this freshness, we are well on our way toward loving, self care and evoking this ordinary magic.

The Full 12 Day Wellness Program for the New Year

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Day 1: Embracing the Self

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Morning Ritual (15 minutes): Start your day with affirmations. Stand in front of the mirror, look into your eyes, and repeat positive affirmations about self-love, acceptance, and body positivity.

Throughout the Day: Practice self-compassion. Think about all of the good you have done since you have come into this world.

Evening Reflection (15 minutes): Before bed, take out your journal and write down three things you noticed about your life, family, relationships and things that you love about yourself. Focus on your strengths, beauty and unique qualities.

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Day 2: Cleanse and Detoxify

Download Detox Plan

Morning Ritual (15 minutes): Begin your day with warm lemon water to kick-start your metabolism and aid digestion.

Throughout the Day: Opt for a juice and smoothie cleanse. Include a variety of fruits and vegetables to provide essential nutrients.

Evening Reflection (15 minutes): Reflect on your emotions and thoughts throughout the day. Journal about any insights gained during the cleansing process.

 

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Day 3: Somatics: Mind-Body Connection

Morning Ritual (15 minutes): Engage in a 15-minute yoga session or light stretching to awaken your soma or body and mind.

Throughout the Day: Commit to daily exercise, and do it! Whether it’s a brisk walk, a dance session, or a workout routine, make movement a priority. My trainer made me commit to 30 minutes a day- EVERY DAY, on the elliptical machine and/ or a walk.

Evening Reflection (15 minutes): Practice mindfulness meditation. Reflect on the physical and mental sensations you experienced during the day.

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Day 4: Envisioning Professional Goals

See the 8 Dimensions of Wellness

Morning Ritual (15 minutes): Take time to visualize your professional aspirations. What do you want to do each day when you wake up? Picture yourself achieving your goals.

Throughout the Day: Create a vision board that represents your professional ambitions. Use images, quotes, and symbols that resonate with your dreams.

Evening Reflection (15 minutes): Journal about the steps you can take to turn your vision into reality. Identify small actions you can start taking immediately.

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Day 5: Nurturing Relationships

See Articles on Relationships

Morning Ritual (15 minutes): Send a message of love and gratitude to someone you appreciate, remember any good moments, and express your feelings genuinely. Heal the karma if you can with someone that you have not resolved an issue with. Let friends or family go that are not healthy, nurturing and harmonious.

Throughout the Day: Assess your current relationships. Let go of toxic connections that drain your energy. Surround yourself with those who uplift and support you.

Evening Reflection (15 minutes): Write a letter to yourself outlining the qualities you seek in meaningful relationships. Manifest the love and respect you deserve.

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Day 6: Digital Detox

Morning Ritual (15 minutes): Turn off electronic devices for the first 30 minutes of your day. Spend this time in quiet reflection or engaging in a calming activity.

Throughout the Day: Cancel personal social media accounts temporarily. (Yes, I canceled my personal Facebook and never felt better!) Disconnect to reconnect with your inner self.

Evening Reflection (15 minutes): Notice how your mood and energy levels shift without constant digital stimulation, and how much time you have for real, living connections. Reflect on the peace gained through this intentional break.

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Day 7: Nature Connection

Morning Ritual (15 minutes): Step outside and breathe in fresh air and sunlight. Connect with nature by taking a short walk or simply sitting in a natural setting.

Throughout the Day: Spend at least 30 minutes outdoors. Engage in activities that ground you, such as gardening or hiking. Feel the earth of your feet.

Evening Reflection (15 minutes): Journal about the tranquility and grounding sensations you experienced. Consider how nature can be a source of ongoing rejuvenation.

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Day 8: Creative Expression

Morning Ritual (15 minutes): This is otherwise known as Vitamin J=Joy! Engage in a creative activity, such as drawing, writing, or ecstatic dancing. Allow yourself to express without judgment.

Throughout the Day: Take time for a creative pursuit you enjoy. This could be cooking, crafting, signing or playing a musical instrument.

Evening Reflection (15 minutes): Reflect on how creative expression enhances your well-being. Consider incorporating more of it into your daily life.

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Day 9: Gratitude Practice

• Morning Ritual (15 minutes): Start a gratitude journal. Write down three things you’re grateful for each morning. I created a lovely digital planner journal for 2024, you can order here.

Throughout the Day: Express gratitude to those around you. Send a text message, make a call, or express thanks in person.

Evening Reflection (15 minutes): Reflect on the positive moments of the day. Acknowledge the abundance in your life.

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Day 10: Mindful Eating

Morning Ritual (15 minutes): Have a mindful breakfast. Eat slowly, savor each bite, and pay attention to your body’s signals of hunger and fullness. They say that 1/3 of the stomach should have food, 1/3 water and 1/3 should be left empty!

• Throughout the Day: Practice mindful eating in all your meals. Choose nutritious foods that nourish your body.

Evening Reflection (15 minutes): Reflect on how mindful eating influences your relationship with food. Notice any changes in your energy levels and overall well-being.

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Day 11: Energy Clearing

• Morning Ritual (15 minutes): Burn incense, sage or juniper or use another energy-clearing method in your home. Set the intention to release any negative energy.

Throughout the Day: Declutter a space in your home. Let go of items that no longer serve you~ donate gently used clothes, jackets and bedding to Goodwill or the homeless shelters.

Evening Reflection (15 minutes): Journal about the emotional and mental space created through the physical act of decluttering. Notice how a clean, fresh space affects your mood.

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Day 12: Self-Celebration and Reflection

Morning Ritual (15 minutes): Celebrate your journey, and you just being you, with all of your positive qualities and flaws. Acknowledge the growth and positive changes you’ve experienced.

Throughout the Day: Pamper yourself with self-care activities you enjoy. This could be a spa day, reading a favorite book, or simply resting with tea.

Evening Reflection (15 minutes): Write a letter to your future self, expressing gratitude for the commitment to self-love and  well-being. Reflect on the many lessons learned and envision the continued journey of self-discovery.

 

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Clean Living for a New Year

As we step into this new year, let’s shift our focus from resolutions and future attainments to uncovering our already existing natural wellness. Just 30 minutes a day of self-care time and really being present in our lives can help so much. Clean living, detoxing the body, mind, relationships and creating a sacred space in our homes and work is a powerful commitment to our well-being. There might just be a rainbow already there, that we can so easily miss. Please stay in touch and bookmark our holistic offerings at buddhistsomatics.com, where ancient wisdom meets modern, feminine-inspired wellness. A few small lifestyle changes can empower us to detoxify and start the year with renewed freshness, energy, and live our best lives!

Dawn Boiani-Sandberg

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Image: https://www.futurity.org/wp/wp-content/uploads/2013/05/rainbow_droplets_525.jpg

Radical Self Acceptance- Why I’m Not Making New Year’s Resolutions

First and foremost, I have decided to not make any New Year’s resolutions this year. They usually last me about three days, and it’s a setup for failure. I, like so many women also have spent my entire life feeling: inadequate, not beautiful enough, not thin enough, not smart enough, not enlightened enough. I came from a very critical family of origin and culture, and was always looking outside myself for confirmation, comfort and solace. I then, joined a few religions that exacerbated deep existential fears, judgement of self and others, punishments in some most likely made-up afterlife, self doubt and negative self talk.

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I’ve been trapped in a lifelong, colossal self-improvement project, that just fosters more self hatred that expresses itself as spiritual narcissism and codependency. There is a Buddhist teaching we often forget, and that is called Maitri in sanskrit, it means having kindness and compassion for yourself. We can’t hope to have any genuine compassion for others, or engender world peace, if we can’t firstly find that within us. My one “resolution” is, to finally accept and sincerely love myself in a real way, just as I am– for the first time, starting today!

Radical self-acceptance can be defined as the process of fully and unconditionally embracing ourselves, including all aspects of our identity, experiences, the wide spectrum of emotions, from the most noble to the most profane. It goes beyond simply tolerating or acknowledging ourself; it involves embracing with open arms, and shedding light on all parts of ourselves, including the shadow, that is often seen as flawed or undesirable. We become our own best friend, as someone once said, I’ve found~ “the greatest love of all.”

Radical self-acceptance rejects the need for constant external validation or approval (e.g. social media) and instead focuses on cultivating a deep sense of self-worth and self-love from within. We are no longer people pleasers, nor live from needing others to confirm our ego, putting a temporary band-aid on a broken soul. We can acknowledge that all of us, as being human, means having imperfections, making mistakes, and experiencing both radiant successes and devastating failures. It is about keeping going, embracing all of these aspects with kindness, compassion, and non-judgment. Radical self-acceptance requires acknowledging and finally letting go of dark, self-critical thoughts and negative self-perceptions that may have been internalized over time by our family, culture or even religious community. There is no more space for guilt, blame and shame, we can forgive ourselves and be a veritable lamp unto ourselves. We can embrace our strengths and weaknesses, honoring one’s passions and interests, and giving oneself permission to be- ok with not being ok!

12 Days to Uncovering The Divine Feminine

Welcome to this transformative, New Year’s 12-day journey towards unveiling the already existing divine feminine within us. This wellness manual is our guide to embracing self-love, genuine, “Grounded Goddess” spirituality, and overall natural well-being. Well-being also embraces this imperfection, shadow and not always feeling great. Let’s embark on this beautiful, poignant adventure together, one day at a time.

On each of the 12 days, I’m going to post an inspiring quote from an accomplished Divine Feminine. If you can, I’d like each of us to wake up 30 to 45 minutes earlier, in the stillness, bliss and quietude of the early morning. A private time, just for you, before any other family members or pets awaken, to start the day with the self-care ritual. Each day, I invite us to integrate a few micro-changes, reflections and insights as we take steps to living our most authentic, and best life possible.

And finally, as we settle down before bed, if we could spend 15 minutes and journal, reflecting upon some of the topics for the day. If you could get a nice shiny new journal and flow-y ink pen; or better yet a brand new daily planner, one that you can write in, that would be great! They have some low cost daily planners at Marshalls, TjMaxx, Home Goods or Staples. I also created a simple, low cost and fun, Digital Daily Planner if you have an Ipad and Stylus Pen and an app called Goodnotes. Let’s embark on this beautiful adventure together, one day at a time… starting today!

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WISE WOMBMAN QUOTE

“The world and some of the people in it try to steal and extinguish the fires that exist with in us … we were born with these fires burning in our hearts and the core of our being. They try stealing the fires that ignite the dances we feel and know and move to the moment we first hear them upon arriving earth side. They try to steal the fires that warm our voices to sing-love songs, fight songs and songs of celebration. They try to steal the fires that strengthen and protect…the ones that rise up like holy bonfires when needed -life or death. Yes, they may try to steal the fire… but they cannot steal what creates the fire… they can’t steal the glowing embers that are always hidden below the blackened scarred evidence of once was. Let them try to keep your fires dim. Let them … let them try to keep you from your freedom to live joyfully and fully. These fires may take some work to re-ignite… but they can and will burn. Light them over and over again… learn to care for and protect your fire. Watch others light theirs if you need to. Be inspired … but do not sit wishing… take… the …. steps.

 For those finding their way through the coals… you will find what you are looking for. You can heal these wounds… little by little you will dance again.”
Lisa Martinez- Modern Medicine Wombman

Day 1: Embracing the Self

 

Morning Ritual (15 minutes): Start your day with affirmations. Stand in front of the mirror, look into your eyes, and repeat positive affirmations about self-love, acceptance, and body positivity. Take deep breaths, thank your organs, cells and blood for working to keep you alive. You can put a hand on each organ, and “smile” inside to thank them! Then think of at least 3-5 things you love about your body or appearance, just as it is.

Throughout the Day: Practice self-compassion. Think about all of the good you have done since you have come into this world. Who have you loved, who has loved you? Who have you helped, and been generous with? Talk to  yourself with kindness, love, appreciation and respect. Notice any negative self talk, guilt, shame, blame or inner harshness, and let those thoughts detox from your mindstream. Replace them with positive thoughts, acknowledge your accomplishments and forgive yourself for any perceived shortcomings.

Evening Reflection (15 minutes): Before bed, take out your journal and write down three things you noticed about your life, family, relationships and things that you love about yourself. Focus on your strengths, beauty and unique qualities. Use the Buddha’s “Sleeping Lion” pose. Go to sleep on your right side, with your right arm bent under your head, gently pressing the right nostril and your left resting on your torso. Imagine a pink lotus flower in your throat chakra, beaming with warm clear light. Feel the mother of cosmic space blanketing and protecting you, from inner and outer space. Your are loved and blessed by a world of goodness, light and compassion. You are loved. Sleep soundly and deeply. Goodnight dear Goddess~

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Image of Native Woman Copyright: luzazure

Festive Vegetarian Main Course- Eggplant Parmesan Stacks

Serves 4

I had quiet holiday retreat and wanted to make a decadent gourmet vegetarian dinner, and this was amazing. You can use vegan cheese or regular cheese, your choice, either way these eggplant steaks make a great main course! The key is a slightly spicy homemade tomato red pepper marinara sauce, blender-free- and infinitely better than prepared sauce. This is great paired with oven roasted asparagus or broccoli rabe.

Ingredients for the Marinara Sauce:

  • 1 large red bell pepper (chopped)*
  • 1½ cups organic tomatoes (chopped)
  • 2 cloves garlic (minced)
  • 4 tbsp olive oil
  • 2 tsp dried oregano
  • 1½ tsp salt
  • ½ cup diced yellow onion
  • 1 tsp crushed red pepper
  • ½ tsp onion powder
  • ½ tsp honey
  • ½ tsp garlic power
  • ¼ tsp ground black pepper
  • 1½ cups water

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Instructions:

*(Optional Pre-Roasting) Heat oven to 400ºF, and roast: sliced peppers, garlic, onions and tomatoes on a cookie sheet with 2T olive oil for 20 minutes, then broil for 2. When finished, place all vegetables on cutting board and then coarsely chop to 1/2″, leave some texture.

  1. Use a thick bottomed pot and heat olive oil on medium.
  2. Saute all ingredients except the water for 5 minutes, until onions are clear.
  3. Add water and stir, cover and simmer on warm.

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Ingredients for the Eggplant Steaks and side:

  • 3 medium eggplants, enough for about 20, 5″d. steaks, cut into about 1cm h.
  • 2 cups of breadcrumbs, gluten free or panko are fine
  • ½ tsp salt and pepper to taste
  • 6-8 eggs in a medium bowl, whisked together
  • 1 cup olive oil
  • 1 bunch of fresh spinach leaves washed
  • 8 oz./1 packet of mozzarella cheese (vegan is ok)
  • 2 tablespoons grated Parmesan cheese (vegan is ok)
  •  1 bunch parsley and roasted red peppers for garnish
  • 1 large packet of asparagus or 2 bunches of broccoli rabe. (Optional roasted fingerling potatoes, side salad and garlic bread

Instructions:

  1. Heat a large frying pan, cast iron in the best with olive oil, to medium high.
  2. Take a shallow medium bowl, and place breadcrumbs, Parmesan and salt mixed together.
  3. Dunk each eggplant steak into egg mixture and then into breadcrumbs, and then fry.
  4. Wash asparagus and put on a cookies sheet, drizzle with olive oil and a pinch of sea salt, roast for 15 minutes at 425ºF.
  5. Before Serving, place eggplants topped with mozzarella in oven on broil for 2 minutes, to melt cheese.
  6. To Serve: Spread a thin layer of marinara sauce on the bottom of each plate, and alternate each steak with spinach, top with red pepper and parsley, serve with asparagus.
  7. Serve hot with a side salad or home-made crusty garlic bread, perfect paired with a deep bodied, organic Cabernet.

Notes: Vegan Mozzarella – If you’re using vegan cheese, I prefer Miyoko ™ fresh mozzarella that melts well or shredded Follow Your Heart ™ Mozzarella.

 

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HappyForks-analyzer

Photo by Zen Chung: https://www.pexels.com/photo/ripe-healthy-eggplants-placed-in-box-in-farm-5529596/

eggplant-parmesean-stacks

Festive Vegetarian Main Course- Eggplant Parmesan Stacks

I had quiet holiday retreat and wanted to make a decadent gourmet vegetarian dinner, and this was amazing. You can use vegan cheese or regular cheese, your choice, either way these eggplant steaks make a great main course! The key is a slightly spicy homemade tomato red pepper marinara sauce, blender-free- and infinitely better than prepared sauce. This is great paired with oven roasted asparagus or broccoli rabe.

Ingredients
  

  • 1 large red bell pepper chopped*
  • cups organic tomatoes chopped
  • 2 cloves garlic minced
  • 4 tbsp olive oil
  • 2 tsp dried oregano
  • tsp salt
  • ½ cup diced yellow onion
  • 1 tsp crushed red pepper
  • ½ tsp onion powder
  • ½ tsp honey
  • ½ tsp garlic power
  • ¼ tsp ground black pepper
  • cups water
  • 3 medium eggplants enough for about 20, 5"d. steaks, cut into about 1cm h.
  • 2 cups of breadcrumbs gluten free or panko are fine
  • ½ tsp salt and pepper to taste
  • 6-8 eggs in a medium bowl whisked together
  • 1 cup olive oil
  • 1 bunch of fresh spinach leaves washed
  • 8 oz./1 packet of mozzarella cheese vegan is ok
  • 2 tablespoons grated Parmesan cheese vegan is ok
  • 1 bunch parsley and roasted red peppers for garnish
  • 1 large packet of asparagus or 2 bunches of broccoli rabe. (Optional roasted fingerling potatoes side salad and garlic bread

Instructions
 

  • *(Optional Pre-Roasting) Heat oven to 400ºF, and roast: sliced peppers, garlic, onions and tomatoes on a cookie sheet with 2T olive oil for 20 minutes, then broil for 2. When finished, place all vegetables on cutting board and then coarsely chop to 1/2", leave some texture.
  • Use a thick bottomed pot and heat olive oil on medium.
  • Saute all ingredients except the water for 5 minutes, until onions are clear.
  • Add water and stir, cover and simmer on warm.
  • Heat a large frying pan, cast iron in the best with olive oil, to medium high.
  • Take a shallow medium bowl, and place breadcrumbs, Parmesan and salt mixed together.
  • Dunk each eggplant steak into egg mixture and then into breadcrumbs, and then fry.
  • Wash asparagus and put on a cookies sheet, drizzle with olive oil and a pinch of sea salt, roast for 15 minutes at 425ºF.
  • Before Serving, place eggplants topped with mozzarella in oven on broil for 2 minutes, to melt cheese.
  • To Serve: Spread a thin layer of marinara sauce on the bottom of each plate, and alternate each steak with spinach, top with red pepper and parsley, serve with asparagus.

Notes

Serve hot with a side salad or home-made crusty garlic bread, perfect paired with a deep bodied, organic Cabernet.
Notes: Vegan Mozzarella - If you're using vegan cheese, I prefer Miyoko (tm) fresh mozzarella that melts well or shredded Follow Your Heart (tm) Mozzarella.

Nutrient Dense-Seed and Nut Paleo Keto Bread

This is the first winter snow of the season, so I decided to make a comforting, low-carb keto Paleo nut bread to warm up the house! This is a very dense, high-protein, super-food nut bread that’s pretty versatile so if you don’t have all the ingredients you can mix and match certain nuts and flours. This bread is perfect for your morning breakfast slathered with real butter or vegan butter, jam, and it will certainly give you energy all morning.

It would be good if you had a pretty small bread baking bread tin. The one I used is 4″ x 6″ x 2″h, because this wheat flour-less bread is so dense and believe it or not a few cups of flour and seeds fit into a little teeny tiny baking tin. It’s also really good idea if you have a piece of parchment paper line the baking tin with. If you don’t have a small baking tin like that, then just form it into an oval bread roll and bake in oven on cookie sheet with parchment paper. Serves four, about 10 slices.

nut-bread

 

Ingredients:

• 1/4 cup whole almonds
• 1/4 cup whole walnuts
• 1/2 cup pumpkin seeds
• 1/4 cup sunflower seeds
• 1/4 cup flax seeds or flax meal
• 3 tablespoons chia seeds
• 3 tablespoons hulled sesame seeds
• 1 1/2 cups organic almond flour superfine
• 1 teaspoon baking soda
• 1 teaspoon baking powder
• 1/2 teaspoon salt
• 3 eggs (for vegans, you can use 3 flax eggs)
• 1/2 cup melted coconut oil
• 2 tablespoon or maple syrup or honey

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Directions:

• Preheat the oven to 350 degrees F.
• Place the whole almonds and walnuts in a blender or food processor, and lightly chop.
• In a bowl, combine the flour, baking powder and soda, salt and stir well.
• In another bowl, beat the three eggs together and then stir in all nuts, eggs, melted coconut oil and sweetener, combine with flour mixture and stir to mix well.
• Line a 6×4 or 8×4 inch loaf pan with parchment paper. Spread the mixture into the lined loaf pan and use a spoon to smooth down the surface. Sprinkle the top with some extra pumpkin, flax and sesame seeds.
• Bake the bread on the middle shelf for 45-50 minutes or until a toothpick inserted into the center of the bread comes out clean. Let the bread cool completely and then remove it from the pan.
• Store the bread in the refrigerator in an airtight container or wrap with plastic wrap. It will keep for about 4 days.
• Serve warmed with butter and/or jam!

keto-seed-bread

keto-seed-bread

Nutrient Dense-Seed and Nut Paleo Keto Bread

This is the first winter snow of the season, so I decided to make a comforting, low-carb keto Paleo nut bread to warm up the house! This is a very dense, high-protein, super-food nut bread that's pretty versatile so if you don't have all the ingredients you can mix and match certain nuts and flours. This bread is perfect for your morning breakfast slathered with real butter or vegan butter, jam, and it will certainly give you energy all morning.

Equipment

  • 4" x 6" x 2"h baking tin, parchment paper

Ingredients
  

  • 1/4 cup whole almonds
  • 1/4 cup whole walnuts
  • 1/2 cup pumpkin seeds
  • 1/4 cup sunflower seeds
  • 1/4 cup flax seeds or flax meal
  • 3 tablespoons chia seeds
  • 3 tablespoons hulled sesame seeds
  • 1 1/2 cups organic almond flour superfine
  • 1 teaspoon baking soda
  • 1 teaspoon baking powder
  • 1/2 teaspoon salt
  • 3 eggs for vegans, you can use 3 flax eggs
  • 1/2 cup melted coconut oil
  • 2 tablespoon or maple syrup or honey

Instructions
 

  • Preheat the oven to 350 degrees F.
  • Place the whole almonds and walnuts in a blender or food processor, and lightly chop.
  • In a bowl, combine the flour, baking powder and soda, salt and stir well.
  • In another bowl, beat the three eggs together and then stir in all nuts, eggs, melted coconut oil and sweetener, combine with flour mixture and stir to mix well.
  • Line a 6x4 or 8x4 inch loaf pan with parchment paper. Spread the mixture into the lined loaf pan and use a spoon to smooth down the surface. Sprinkle the top with some extra pumpkin, flax and sesame seeds.
  • Bake the bread on the middle shelf for 45-50 minutes or until a toothpick inserted into the center of the bread comes out clean. Let the bread cool completely and then remove it from the pan.
  • Store the bread in the refrigerator in an airtight container or wrap with plastic wrap. It will keep for about 4 days.
  • Serve warmed with butter and/or jam!

 

As a survivor of profound early emotional neglect having been raised in a dysfunctional family system, I’ve spent a considerable amount of time delving into the intricacies of attachment styles, particularly those pioneered by British Psychologist John Bowlby and Mary Ainsworth. Understanding these styles has been a crucial aspect of my journey towards healing and forming healthier connections and more secure, nurturing relationships. This rigorously honest, deep work, to me, is the Dharma. I feel that many of us have bypassed properly relating to and healing emotional patterns that come from early childhood wounding and unprocessed grief, fear, and trauma. By doing so, it’s veritably impossible to make any real progress in our lives or on any spiritual path. I’m grateful to have the time and resources to really learn these powerful, transformational theories, that again “bring light” to deep shadow aspects of ourselves.

What is Attachment?

When a secure attachment is developed, adults and infants are attuned to one another. The central theme of attachment theory is that primary caregivers who are available and responsive to an infant’s needs allow the child to develop a sense of warmth and security. The infant learns that the caregiver is dependable, which creates a secure base for the child to then explore the world, experience joy, play and has support for needs. For example, a baby cries and is hungry, and someone comes soon to tend to them, lovingly. These early imprints suggest that the world is safe and one’s caregivers are helpful and supportive. One’s caregiver can provide love, comfort, safety, and needs can be met.

This quality of secure attachment provides the foundation for healthy and trusting relationships in the future. Attachment defines the child’s sense of stability, quality of social interactions, and emotional and cognitive development as they grow into adulthood, and is a huge determining factor in one’s adjustment and quality of life.

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So what determines successful attachment? Behaviorists propose that it was basic food and physical security that led to forming this attachment behavior, but Bowlby and others demonstrated that love and emotional nurturance and responsiveness were the primary determinants of attachment.

If secure, our attachment pattern can help bolster our healthy, secure relationships, but if insecure, may also undermine our ability to establish and maintain healthy intimate relationships and friendships. We can develop a pattern of fear and mistrust, especially when we open and are vulnerable. Adult attachment addresses our ability to connect, feel satisfied in our relationships with ourselves and others, and how we develop and maintain intimacy.

Can Attachment Styles Change?

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TIPS TO CHANGE ATTACHMENT STYLES:

Yes, we are not fixed and the theory of neuroplasticity says that, with effort,we can change! It’s important to seek help from a professional if you deem appropriate, to help us understand about attachment styles. It’s also very important, if you’re currently in an emotional relationship, to get to know your partner’s patterns. This is, because it’s essential for us to increase our sense of attachment security and, for this to happen, we need to learn more about our partner by sharing details to improve closeness and strengthen bonds.

To do this, you can do things like asking questions about their interests, speak about what you two share in common, places you’d love to visit together, etc. It can also be helpful to find activities you can share, and this way you two can bond. When it comes to any relationship, it is also very important to understand the values you want in any type of relationship. When we seek to enter a relationship, we can build stronger relationships when we understand personal values. Having shared values, not attaction, has proven to be the greatest determinate of the longest lasting marriages.

The Effects on Relationships

As we’ve discussed previously, children who are securely attached as infants tend to develop stronger self-esteem and self-reliance as they grow older. As such, they tend to be more independent and perform better later in school, college, work, and have successful social relationships and marriages and experience less depression and anxiety. They are also more resilent in times of loss, illness or stress. Although it’s important to mention that attachment styles displayed in adulthood are not necessarily the same as those seen in infancy, early attachments can have a serious impact on later relationships. Adults who were securely attached in childhood tend to have good self-esteem, strong romantic relationships, and the ability to self-disclose and develop safety and trust with others.

What are Attachment Styles?

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Find Out What Type of Attachment Style You Have

Bowlby identified four main attachment styles that emerge in early childhood and continue to influence our relationships throughout life: secure, anxious-preoccupied, dismissive-avoidant, and fearful-avoidant. Each style shapes the way we approach intimacy, trust, and emotional vulnerability.

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The four attachment styles are:
1. Anxious (also referred to as Preoccupied)
2. Avoidant (also referred to as Dismissive)
3. Disorganized (also referred to as Fearful-Avoidant)
4. Secure

TAKE THE QUIZ

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First and foremost, let’s explore the secure attachment style. If you’re fortunate enough to have developed this style, you likely experienced consistent love, care, and responsiveness from your caregivers. This foundation instilled in you a sense of trust in relationships, allowing you to feel comfortable both giving and receiving affection.

For example, my husband grew up with a relatively functional family in Sweden with a nurturing mother, father and siblings. There was no overt abuse and he was loved, fed, educated and had close friends and siblings. He has never as far as I know, exhibited fear, jealousy or mistrust in our 20 years of marriage. His attachment style is… secure.

On the flip side, the anxious-preoccupied attachment style the I experienced for years, stemmed from inconsistent or nonexistent caregiving. People like me with this style tend to crave closeness but may also fear abandonment, leading to heightened sensitivity and a constant need for reassurance. The parent’s love was not reciprocated, and this can cause a lifetime of emotional scars, insecurity, low self esteem, fears and fear of our basic survival.

For example, I grew up with an alcoholic father, and there was violence in the first three years of my life as a baby in the crib. I would hear my parents fighting and cry, but they could not hear me, or ignored me, over their arguing. No one ever came to sooth me, and I recall, many nights being so scared and crying myself to sleep, wearing a pink zippered onesie. These imprints run deep, and amazingly, through intense therapeutic work and a longing  to really heal in this life, I have access to these memories that created this anxious attachment style. It is only in the past three years that this process has been brought to light, routed out and healed to a greater degree, and for that, I am grateful.

Next, there’s the dismissive-avoidant attachment style, which often results from caregivers who were emotionally distant or unavailable. People with this style may find it challenging to open up and may prioritize independence and withdrawal over emotional connection. These are the quintessential escapists, renunciates, and indeed, misanthropes. There are often overtones here with Narcissism or Antisocial Personality Disorder.

One of the rarest and most challenging style is the fearful-avoidant attachment style, a blend of anxious-preoccupied and dismissive-avoidant. This arises generally from abuse with profound trauma and/or inconsistent care-giving environment. Those with this style desire intimacy but fear getting too close, creating a perpetual loop of internal struggle. There are often overtones here with Borderline Personality Disorder. Without treatment, the fearful avoidant may never be able to be in sustained, healthy, authentic, genuine friendships and partnerships. The learned fear and mistrust, which were once an accurate coping response to an abusive or neglectful parent or milieu, precedes them.

 

bowlby-attachment-theory

How to Develop a Secure Attachment Style (It’s NEVER Too Late!)

Now, let’s delve into the steps to develop a secure attachment style, a journey I embarked on myself. It’s important to remember that you cannot change your past, but you can always change the present. We are not forever cursed and defined by what happened to us. Self-knowledge is self-love is… power.

  1. Self-awareness: Reflect on your attachment style and its origins. Understanding your patterns is the first step towards change.
  2. Therapeutic intervention: Seek professional help if needed. Therapy provides a safe space to explore past experiences, challenge negative beliefs, and develop healthier coping mechanisms.
  3. Mindfulness and self-regulation: Practice being present in the moment. Learn to identify and regulate your emotions, allowing for more conscious and intentional responses in relationships.
  4. Communication: Express your needs and feelings openly with your loved ones. Effective communication builds trust and fosters a secure connection.
  5. Boundaries and reciprocity: Establish healthy boundaries and ensure that relationships are based on mutual respect and reciprocity. A secure attachment style thrives on balanced give-and-take.

My personal journey has taught me that healing and developing a secure attachment style is an ongoing process, and according to recent assessments, mine went from anxious attachment to… secure! 🌟 I have an interesting personal insight as a trauma survivor that I’d like to share. The basic building blocks of who we are never really seem to change and that makes sense to me. I’m never going to forget, bury memories or dissociate from what happened, these experiences make me, me. However, through self awareness and being in sync with myself, I can change how I react to situations.

For example, I might be at home with my husband and he’s been in his big leather lounge chair reading most of the night and not speaking. He’s a quiet, bookish, science-y type. Subconsciously, I might think, oh, he’s upset/ignoring me- [insert whatever fear-based thought may arise]. In the past, I may have believed my own hurt-infused projection and may have confronted him or needed confirmation and attention. Now, if this happens, and it does because the “karmic seeds” will seemingly always be there, I notice it as it is happening. I ask myself quietly, is he really ignoring you or upset? No, he’s not a punitive, passive-aggressive, silent type like I experienced with my family of origin; I could never stand for that in a marriage. Then, I “reality test” take a deep breath, reassure myself and let it go. I might now, give him a quick kiss, and go up and read or meditate myself, sans any drama recurring from my past attachment style.

It can be done. Healing involves this self-reflection, self-and-other compassion, and a commitment to fostering and maintaining meaningful connections. While the past may shape us, it doesn’t define us, our present or future relationships. We have the power to rewrite our attachment narratives. I’m living proof that with effort, healing is possible, we are simply not our past nor defined by how others raised or treated us, thankfully.

May you all flourish, have the deepest and healthiest relationships, starting with yourself, and live your very best life possible!

Citations: Introduction to Attachment Disorder Udemy

Photo by Kristina Paukshtite: https://www.pexels.com/photo/woman-carrying-a-baby-3242264/

Photo by Taryn Elliott: https://www.pexels.com/photo/photo-of-woman-carrying-child-3889806/

Graphics: Copyrighted by LIGHTANDSALTDESIGNCO.COM on Etsy, please do not share or reproduce.

Green Tara Mantra- Remover of all Obstacles and Fear

This was recorded live from Shoshoni Ashram in Rollinsville, Colorado, 2023 during our annual women’s fall yoga retreat, filled with radiant goddesses and yoginis. It is sung by Kalika, in a call and response format. The Green Tara Mantra- is exceedingly powerful and she is said to be the remover of all obstacles and fear. We so need that now in these times. May it be so!

goddesses

Read More about Green Tara and her mantra here.

 

Please listen to the mantra here: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Jn2EFAR17hQ

The Hawaiian Ho’oponopono mantra is a traditional practice deeply rooted in the cultural and spiritual fabric of Hawaii. Ho’oponopono, which means “to make right” or “to rectify,” is a process of reconciliation and forgiveness. The practice has evolved over centuries and has been handed down through generations, maintaining its significance in Hawaiian culture.

Historically, Ho’oponopono was a communal practice led by a kahuna, a Hawaiian spiritual leader or shaman. It was employed to resolve conflicts within families or communities, aiming to restore balance and harmony. The process involved open communication, apology, forgiveness, and mutual understanding. Through Ho’oponopono, Hawaiians sought to heal relationships, promote well-being, and maintain a sense of unity. The premise is that you can forgive, heal and love yourself, and that will resonate to others.

Hooponopono Mantra

I’m sorry
Please forgive me
I love you
Thank you

In more recent times, Ho’oponopono has gained global recognition, thanks in part to the work of Dr. Ihaleakala Hew Len, a Hawaiian psychologist. You can read the story called Zero Limits by Dr. Vitale. Dr. Len adapted the traditional practice into a personal development tool by introducing a mantra: “I’m sorry, please forgive me, I love you, thank you.” According to Dr. Len, the power of this mantra lies in taking radical responsibility for one’s experiences, pain and the world around them. The efficacy of the Ho’oponopono mantra is attributed to the belief that healing begins within oneself. By repeating these phrases, we aim to clear negative energy, release resentment and inner toxicity, and foster a sense of love, gratitude and well-being.

While the scientific evidence supporting the healing effects of Ho’oponopono may be limited, many people attest to its positive impact on their well-being. Reportedly, Dr. Hew Len was hired by the Hawaii State Hospital, to help with difficulties with their wards for the criminally insane. There was a lot of violence and restraints and many staff were assaulted, in danger and left. He reportedly opened clients files and recited the mantra over their files, and reportedly the clients decreased their behaviors, left seclusion and began to heal. The patients began to have accountability and took steps toward self care. The census in the ward declined and was later closed.

There is no concrete evidence of causation or correlation, but this powerful mantra surely evokes a sense of deep healing, self love and forgiveness. It echos the traditional forgiveness and accountability practiced in Buddhism, called maitri, karuna and The Four Powers. The practice continues to resonate with people seeking a holistic approach to healing and personal transformation, embracing both its cultural roots and modern adaptations. In the video above, you can recite this 108 times. You can use a mala rosary as a tool to help with your recitations, or recite this with one hand on the heart and one on the belly. You can recite this 108 times every day to cleanse all relational hurts, guilt, resentment and toxicity. Let us know in the comments how you feel afterwards!

Examining our deepest fears of intimacy and wounding.

I was never a fan of the show “FRIENDS” but reading about Matthew Perry’s untimely death this morning struck a deep, reflective chord in me. He passed away in a hot tub after battling for years with addiction and going in and out of rehab centers. He never married and never had any children, although he did have relationships with famous people like Julia Roberts. He and I are the same age and his tragic death caused me to reflect upon my own life, spiritual tradition and friendships. He longed to become ready to eventually let someone in and find love. He said:

”That was me afraid. I manifest something that’s wrong with them, and then I break up with them. But there can’t be something wrong with everyone. I’m the common denominator. I left first because I thought they were going to annihilate me.” 

Matthew Perry- People Magazine

However, he said that he had finally ”gotten over” his ”fear of love” after becoming sober in May 2021 and said ”I’m not afraid anymore,” and said that he wanted to find love and have children.

Accountability- What it Means to Grow Up

In any 12 step program, one of the hardest things is to begin the trajectory toward healing, and take the first step and admit that you have a problem. I commend Matthew for going into rehabs to battle with his inner fears and demons. I don’t know if drugs and alcohol were involved in his death, but irrespective of that, I think his memoirs show that he was able to have a great degree of insight and accountability.

I appreciate that he did a sufficient amount of inner work to be able to see his shadow and see where he had deprived himself from really being able to go deep, and love another person by wanting to make a commitment and eventually, have a family. Just that insight alone is so rare, that a person is able to see their core issues in and their wounding and then long to heal and make personal change. This means that he was able to venture into the darkest places within himself, that a lot of us never dare to touch. As far as I’m concerned, because of this accountability, he died somewhat spiritually healed and exhibited rare bravery. Matthew, I’d like to wish you well and I would like to learn from some of the things that you shared, so that each of us could have deeper relationships, and more fulfilling lives and not let our fears, insecurities and inner demons cast us forever into a life of emotional isolation and despair.

 

avoidant-personality

What is Love Avoidance?

According to the DSM5, avoidant personality disorder it is a cluster B/C personality disorder, hallmarked with a “sensitive hyper-vigilant temperament, with a general longing to relate to others.” Furthermore they have excessive fears of such issues as intolerance of any disapproval, criticism, or rejection. Love avoidants also have “inhibition in new interpersonal situations because of feelings of inadequacy.”

One of the hallmarks of a love avoidant, is that they can avoid being hurt or being emotionally vulnerable, and they stay in complete control of the relationship by withholding. Love avoidants exhibit intense escapism and often sabotage any chance of someone really becoming close to them. Because of this deep inner wounding and intense insecurity, they wind up often turning to drugs and alcohol and compulsive behaviors. They can be secretive, sexually compulsive and use distancing techniques like devaluing and criticizing their partners as the method of staying in control. They sometimes are “tactile defensive,” not wanting to be touched, except for sex.

At the first moment that they become vulnerable where they perceive that their partner might want to offend, hurt or leave them, that partner who they attempted to open up to, now becomes the enemy in their mind. They will usually discard their partner vehemently. This black-and-white thinking, is called splitting, where the person that they attempted to open to, is now inaccurately perceived as “all, bad or all evil.” This is very commonly exhibited in many cluster B personality disorders, like Borderline, Antisocial and Narcissistic Personality Disorder. Love avoidance is a maladaptive, protective coping skill that can come from people that were neglected or abused as children. Sometimes there are genetic factors that are inherited generationally, and in these cases there is no real treatment or cure. However, in Matthew’s case, he was capable of insight and contrition, and for people like that, there is often hope.

Love Avoidance and Spiritual Bypassing

I wanted to share why this personally inspired me to write today. I have tried many relationships in my Buddhist community for decades with men that supposedly upheld values like: being trustworthy and safe, having ethics, compassion, patience, listening, forgiveness and indeed, 84,000 different skillful means of compassionate expression and problem solving skills. However, time and time again I would meet these men, sometimes even exalted teachers, and it became revealed that many had serious emotional issues, reactivity and commitment and control issues, that would result in conflict and breakups. I wound up marrying someone outside of my Buddhist spiritual tradition who was very sane, stable and well adjusted and we’ve been able to be married for over 22 years now.

A lot of my close Buddhist Dharma friends, both men and women are single, not all but many. I feel like if I had tried to find someone in our tradition, I probably would still be single myself. I’ve noticed that a lot of us admittedly, including myself, came in to Buddhism as westerners and spiritual seekers, because of some type of pain or core wounding or unresolved issues. The tradition values a simple, unfettered life without commitments and a strong commitment to hours of daily meditation practice.

I’ve still gotten into painful conflicts with many yogi-robed acquaintances, mostly men on social media where, I would say one benign thing that they perceived as some type of injury and they would become rageful, defame or even block me. It was pretty vicious and callous, and it’s clear that they are using our tradition to foster nothing but Spiritual Narcissism. Many of them purport to be “dharma experts” and use daily photos of Buddhist teachers and insightful quotes to gain +/-500 virtue signaling “Likes.” What a sad life and waste of time and indeed these men are often quintessential love avoidants. I know that social media becomes a place where people with significant damage, wounding and personality disorders can play out a lot of prey/predator narcissistic disordered games. For that reason, I’ve left a lot of the social media milieus, and it has given me my real life back, with time for real relationships.

Was Gautama the Original Love Avoidant?

The Buddha himself was a renunciate and in fact even left his wife and newborn child and all responsibilities to “self actualize.” If he had left his wife and child so callously in this day and age, we may have considered him quite selfish and legally, he would be considered a “deadbeat dad” in many countries. However, the difference between the Buddha leaving his family and going deep into his ascetic, yogic practices and meditation was that his leaving was based on a very serious longing to develop himself and foster compassion to help others. That was an act of bravery as referenced above with Mr. Perry, rather than an act of escapism and avoidance.

Since his time, we’ve had a tradition of both lay and monastic practitioners, and sometimes I wonder what the root motivation is for westerners getting involved with this tradition. If we already have deep wounding and a propensity for escapism, spiritual narcissism and love avoidance, would we then find a religion that reflects, houses and even rewards some of our maladaptive psycho-sexual and relational patterns? I do wonder sometimes if we have misconstrued this basic point, and created an entire religion and paradigm that honors and exalts the propensity to be a love avoidant and bypass our deepest fears of vulnerability, intimacy and early wounding. Just because leaving his family was ok for the Buddha doesn’t mean we should emulate him, if we in contrast, are using our tradition as a method of opiation and escapism. All we will have done is hurt ourselves and others, and wasted this precious life, in spiritual delusion.

I noticed that a lot of my friends claim to have a strong commitment to their Dharma meditation practice and have been told that they have a rare “noble birth,” and consider themselves quite spiritually accomplished and even god-forbid, superior to others. We can’t really be making ANY spiritual progress if we have simply used our tradition for this quintessential spiritual bypass. Staying alone, rejecting the world, rejecting intimacy in some type of strange, self-aggrandized, escapist renunciation is often, simply the fostering of a monumental ego and cowardice, rather than anything that looks like openness, genuine compassion and enlightenment.

Healing Through Awareness

If we have discovered and become honest with ourselves that we are indeed love avoidant, or we are in a relationship with a love avoidant there are ways that these patterns can be healed. The very first step is education, awareness, insight and accountability. Then, we can seek professional counseling with a DBT therapist. And for partnerships: IMAGO is one of the best relationship healing methods.

I wish that Matthew had lived long enough to accomplish his dreams of finally finding real love and intimacy, getting married and having a child. Him understanding and saying that in fact, he was the common denominator in all of these failed relationships, and that he simply was afraid of being hurt, was intensely vulnerable and brave, and indeed, healed. Love avoidants can spend their entire lives blaming others as to why their partner deserved to be hurt, abandoned left or was never, ever good enough. In Buddhism and other spiritual traditions, we formed an entire religion where people are afraid to go deeply into their lives, be vulnerable and make any commitment to really… anything that they consider “worldly.” I think if we shed light on this propensity, we can become better and go beyond our deep wounding and develop true bravery, foster healthy relationships a meaningful life and indeed- real genuine mutual loving connections. I would like to learn and be inspired by Matthew’s life and insights, and may we all have the most meaningful, honest and healed life possible.

 

Citations:

image: pexels evie-shaffer

https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/books/NBK559325/

MissLunaRose12, CC BY-SA 4.0 <https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-sa/4.0>, via Wikimedia Commons

ref:https://beginagaininstitute.com/blog/what-does-it-mean-to-be-love-avoidant

https://people.com/matthew-perry-dead-at-54-7501992

IN OUR DARK TIMES

“An eye for an eye will only make the whole world blind.” ― Mahatma Gandhi

Brief reflections about these current wars, religious conflict, self-care and social action.

Please listen here: https://youtu.be/M2HmscKrAoA

 

Today is my birthday, the inception of a dangerous, inconsolable and heart-wrenching war in the Middle East. It is a particularly poignant fall day as one of my very close friends is dying. He is called a Vajra Brother, and we have many of the same teachers, and he sent this to me as a guide as to how to help him. I thought I would offer it to you all, as indeed, we all will pass, and there are some great instructions from two of my primary Tibetan Buddhist Teachers, Tulku Urgyen Rinpoche and Tsoknyi Rinpoche. It borrows from the world view of the Tibetan Book of the Dead and there are things that all of us can begin to prepare for now, and to help friends to be without fear.

You can download an easy to use, pdf version here.

May it be of benefit in these hard times, and may all be free of suffering.

Training Guide to the Bardos of Dying, Luminous Dharmata, and Karmic Becoming

Compiled by the Pundarika Foundation

Everyone who dies experiences the bardos, but not everyone recognizes them as their own mind. Recognition depends entirely on the quality of my prior practice.

“Not everyone goes through the bardos in the same way. Only a few teachers assert that the journey is universal and that everyone will, for example, experience the deities of the bardo of dharmata in a similar way. Most teachers say that cultural differences and personal idiosyncrasies generate a variety of experiences. Why would a Christian or a Muslim, with very different beliefs, experience death the same way as a Buddhist?

As we will see, the journey through the bardos is a journey through the mind. In the Buddhist view, the essence of the mind is the same for all sentient beings. But the surface structures that cover that essence are different. Hence the journey through the surface structures (the bardo of dying), into the essence of the mind (bardo of dharmata), and then out of it (bardo of becoming) is not the same. But the general pattern of this three-stage process is universal, at least according to the [Tibetan] Buddhist view. Holecek, pgs. 6 – 7

The key to smoothly negotiating the difficulties of death is familiarity. If you deal with some of the details now you can relax at the time of death, and relaxation is the best instruction for how to die. Relaxation is born from familiarity.” Holecek, pgs 10 – 11

An Introductory Discourse by Tulku Urgyen Rinpoche

Why should one learn about the bardo state? Usually we talk about three aspects: the present life, the bardo, and the next life. In the next life, following the intermediate state, we either wander further through samsaric existence, going to one of the higher or lower realms, or attain liberation and enlightenment. Right now we find ourselves in the present life, and the intermediate state, the bardo state, is between the two.

Sometimes six kinds of bardo states are discussed, but they can be condensed into four basic states. The first, the natural bardo of this life, continues from birth until the time of death. The second, the bardo of dying, is the period that begins when we meet with a fatal illness or expire. The third, the bardo of dharmata, occurs when we have fully passed away… Finally, the bardo of becoming is undergone if we have not recognized our nature in the bardo of dharmata.
In addition to these four bardos, two other bardos occur during this life: the bardo of meditation and the bardo of dreaming. The bardo of meditation is the experience of the meditation state. The bardo of dreaming is the dream state during sleep.

Literally, the Tibetan term for “bardo of this life” means “born and remaining.” We have been born from our mother and have not yet passes away. It is the period between birth and death. Here the important point in this lifetime is the bardo of meditation, which depends on receiving the oral instructions from a master and training oneself in them. Then, during the nighttime, one trains in the bardo of dreaming. If in this way one remains in the bardo of meditation throughout day and night, should one worry about any of the other bardo states? Being adept in the bardos of meditation and dreaming is sufficient. Nothing more remains to be done. But without reaching some degree of stability in meditation and the ability to recognize dreams, I am sorry to say, one cannot avoid enduring the bardo of dying.

A good Dzogchen practitioner, on the other hand, is liberated into the expanse of primordial purity during the bardo of dying. He departs through the Secret Pathway of Vajrasattva before expiring. If one is not stable at that point either one will arrive at the bardo of dharmata. Here the natural sounds, colors and lights manifest. Dharmata means nature, the unconditioned. The sounds, colors and lights are unconditioned; they manifest yet they are devoid of self-nature. If one also lacks stability in the bardo of dharmata, sadly enough, one will wander further down into the samsaric circle of seeking another rebirth within the six realms.

As I mentioned earlier, being liberated into the expanse of primordial purity at the moment of death is the best. At this point, one will go through the experiences of appearance, increase and attainment. The first of these three experiences, the whiteness of appearance, occurs with the descent of the white element obtained from one’s father. The second experience, the redness of increase, occurs with the ascent of the red element obtained from one’s mother. The third experience is the actual moment of death.

What follows the moment of this third experience is the fourth experience, the so-called ground luminosity of full attainment. A scripture states: “Then dawns the unconditional wakefulness of bliss and emptiness.” The wakefulness is empty as well as blissful, and if one can recognize it, it is exactly the mahamudra of bliss and emptiness, the mahasiddhi of awareness and emptiness, or the madhyamika of appearance and emptiness.
In most cases, however, following the three experiences of the whiteness of appearance, the redness of increase and the blackness of attainment, one’s consciousness, also called prana-mind, faints in the black experience of the white and red elements meeting together in the heart center.

This moment of unconsciousness is for all ordinary people simply an oblivious state, lasting for the most part for about three and a half days. On the morning of the fourth day, manifestations suddenly unfold as if the sky and earth were rent asunder. One has been unconscious, totally oblivious, not noticing anything up to this point, so one will wonder, “What happened?”

Conventionally, this is of three days’ duration, but actually there is no fixed measure. For those familiar with meditation, it lasts as long as their meditation state, the duration of non-distraction from mind-essence. For people without training in recognizing mind-essence, these “days” just flash past. For those with virtue and evil in equal measure, the duration is approximately three days. What actually happens at this point is that the fourth experience, the ground luminosity of full attainment, is not recognized and one falls unconscious. That happens for most beings. Quite a few people suffer at this moment because of their intense panic and fear of death. A cry of anguish follows, and then they lose consciousness.
After the passing of three and a half days, one awakens from this oblivious state wondering, “What happened to me?” The consciousness leaves the body through one of the eight or nine apertures. It seems quite strange that the mind, which is without any concrete substance, must leave through an opening of the body. If the mind departs through the top of the head, it is said that one goes to the higher realms or continues on the path of liberation. In fact there are several openings on the top of the head. One leads to the Formless Realm, another to the Realm of Form, and yet another to the Pure Lands.
After the consciousness has separated from the body, it will, in the bardo of becoming, go to one of the six realms in keeping with one’s individual karma.

According to the system of Karling Shitro, everything happens within the time span of forty-nine days: the peaceful deities manifest in the first week, the wrathful ones in the second week, and so forth. For some people everything just flickers by; for others it might happen slowly. Time and occurrence remain unfixed.
On the other hand, if one is a trained practitioner, one will recognize, “This is the experience of appearance!” when the whiteness appears, bright and vivid. And when the redness occurs, one will know, “This is the redness!” Finally, when everything goes black, one will acknowledge, “This is the attainment, the blackness!”

After these three experiences, one will also recognize when the ground luminosity of full attainment manifests like a lamp within a vase. At first there is an instant of fainting while the eighty inherent thought states cease. Nothing accompanies the cessation of all thought states but nonconceptual awareness as bright as a lamp in a vase. It is cognizant, nonconceptual, and remains one-pointedly, the union of luminosity and emptiness. That is the ground luminosity, which is like a mother. This means that dharmata, self-existing wakefulness, the sugatagarbha, is like a mother. The recognition of it, which one’s master has pointed out, is like a child. At this moment, the mother and child reunite. The traditional analogy is that it is “like a child jumping into its mother’s lap.” People who are experienced in such practice understand this, and everything stands and falls with that understanding.

At present, the vital point in our practice is to recognize the nature of awareness. We hear statements such as “Recognize your awareness!” or “He has recognized rigpa, the awareness!” Having recognized awareness during one’s lifetime, the key point here is to remain in it – to refrain from losing its continuity. At the instant of the cessation of the eighty thought states, self-existing wakefulness is vividly present – like pure and refined gold, the purity by itself. One can recognize it fully and completely. That is how it has been taught.

This moment has been spoken of thus: “One instant makes the difference. In one instant complete enlightenment.” In the moment of recognition one can attain full enlightenment. That is the meaning of the statement: “The best practitioner attains buddhahood in the dharmakaya at the moment of death.”
If one cannot recognize in that way, however, the next bardo, the bardo of dharmata, will manifest. After the elements and the consciousness have dissolved into space, the stages of space dissolve into luminosity, luminosity dissolves into wisdom, and wisdom dissolves into unity. Unity here means the peaceful and wrathful deities. Following that, unity dissolves into spontaneous presence.

Spontaneous presence refers to that which is originally or inherently present within the ground of primordial purity. Some people wonder, “Where do all these deities and lights come from?” They are the manifestations of the wakefulness spontaneous presence. In the practice of Thogal, as well as in the bardo of dharmata, many deities appear. Those deities are dharmata. They are not conditioned entities but are of an unconditioned nature. Having neither flesh nor blood, they consist of rainbow lights. The key point in the bardo of dharmata is simply to rest in awareness. Without such ability, this bardo lasts no longer than a few flickering moments.

Bardo teachings may sound very fascinating and colorful, but the vital point is one’s individual practice now. Why have medicine when sick, if one doesn’t use it? Without training, our studies become mere intellectual understanding. If study were sufficient, we could simply lean back and read a book about Dzogchen. In fact, there is no way around actual training.
The reading of The Liberation through Hearing in the Bardo aloud for a dead person according to the system of Karling Shitro, is to remind a practitioner who possesses prior training. It is definitely necessary. The most important point is that the reader be someone close to the dead person, one with shared samayas. If the deceased becomes irritated with the reader, there will be no benefit. The two people should, at best, share the same teacher and be compatible. In that case there will be tremendous benefits.

On the other hand, without prior training in recognition of mind-essence, one will be unable to attain stability in the bardo state. A person who never recognized his mind-essence will, in the first place, fail to cut through the misery and fear of dying, and later, when the intense and overwhelming experiences of the sounds, colors, and lights occur, he will be paralyzed with fear. The sounds will roar like one hundred thousand thunderclaps and the lights will shine more brilliantly then one hundred thousand suns. It is not just a dim glimmering light. Those are the sounds, colors, and lights of the bardo of dharmata. One will feel drawn to them. One therefore must attain at least some degree of stability through practice right now.

It is also important to have confidence in these teachings and to develop the determination to be clear-headed in the bardo and recognize what takes place. One must have confidence or all will be lost.
At best, one should receive the pointing-out instructions from a qualified master. Success in the bardo comes from applying one’s present practice of mind-essence at the time of death. Only training dispels the confusion that arises during the bardo state. That is why one must practice the stages of development and completion right now. Recognize this, and then one will experience at death what one is already familiar with through practice.

……The whole reason for receiving bardo teachings has been traditionally described as that of “connecting a broken water pipe.” By training right now, one will be able to continue the “flow” of practice through the bardo state to the following life. In the Dzogchen system bardo training is indispensable. If one has already reached perfection in the practice of Thogal, then there is no need for bardo teachings. In this age, however, life is short, diseases are many, and diligence is feeble. Although one may have entered the path of the Great Perfection, without attaining stability in one’s practice and not being able to know whether the time of death will arrive suddenly, one definitely needs the instruction on how to “connect the broken water pipe.” One will then be able to attain enlightenment in the bardo state, to proceed to a buddha field, or at least gain a rebirth in one of the higher realms. So these are necessary teachings, especially if one meets an untimely death.

When practicing these teachings one must have confidence and trust and be free from doubt. This teaching is like a guide leading the blind in the right direction. To take the hand of such a guide, one needs trust. Without trust, one might lose one’s way. With trust, one will reach the destination. Mirror of Mindfulness, pgs. 2 – 11
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Before death is upon me it is important for me to set my intention on training my mind to maintain stability in my dzogchen practice. It is so easy for me to get distracted in this life and, if not corrected I will be swept away in the coming bardos as easily as I can be swept into thought, emotion and action right now.

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The Bardo of Dying

“The painful bardo of dying is painful because it hurts to let go. But now is the time when we have to. Letting go is just a euphemism for death, and releasing our grip is what transforms the painful bardo of dying into simply the bardo of dying.” Holecek, pg. 68.

Now is the time to:

• Realize with certainty that the whole purpose of the path in this lifetime has been to cultivate bodhicitta, correct my misperception and uncover self-existing wisdom so that cognizance (sambogakaya) knows its own empty nature (dharmakaya). At the time of death, with the dissolving of the elements and consciousness into space (dharmakaya), and space into luminosity, nothing of this conceptual mindstream remains to obscure natural mind’s empty radiance. My intention as a practitioner is to rest in ground luminosity of full attainment, and so reach the destination of enlightenment via the shortest route.

• Make my Dharma Box & finish my legal papers and directives.

• Tell my Dharma friends that before I die I need to be seated upright or in the Lion’s Posture. Direct them to burn my Dharma notebooks and journals with me upon my death.

• Plan my last thought, for it will influence my journey through the bardos. For example, I intend to think: “Now death is coming. It’s my time to die and my intention is to have a still, clear mind. I will supplicate my precious teachers, Tsoknyi Rinpoche and Guru Rinpoche to be with me as I transit the bardos.”

• I intend to rely upon the stability of my practice. By practicing diligently right now, I will establish the ability to sustain rigpa. It will be invaluable in transiting the bardos of death and dying.

• Prepare for the journey so that my heart will be filled with bodhicitta and there will be a calm atmosphere. I know friends & family may be upset, but since I will need to focus, the kindest thing they can do for me is to remain calm, loving and supportive as I concentrate on my practice. I would be grateful if they could participate in the calm atmosphere of the room, which will be silent except for the prayers and mantras I have selected and the instructions whispered in my ear by my lama or Dharma friend. If it’s not possible for them to be calm and quiet, I cannot have them in the room and hope they will understand why.

• Understand what is dissolving. When elements composing the body dissolve, it is just the impure aspects that dissolve, leaving the pure aspects to move into the central channel. This makes for an increase in pure energy, wisdom-wind. With this accumulation of wisdom-wind, it’s much easier to liberate in the Bardo of Dying than it had been in this life.

• Know that actual experiences may not be in the order described, but it will all happen. If I’m not concentrating undistractedly on my practice, it will all pass by quickly. Only with stable awareness will there be time to recognize the nature of mind and attain liberation.

• Be happy and grateful that I have had a teacher and access to teachings that familiarizes me with what is to come in the bardos and how to practice for them! Through our connection, I have confidence that I will feel Tsoknyi Rinpoche’s presence and support.

• Although I intend to persevere in stabilizing my mind and rehearse going through the bardos without distraction, if I die suddenly the the most effective thing to do is chant Om Mani Padme Hum. I trust this will help me overcome the inevitable shock and confusion. I’ll need to recognize I’m dead, call upon Tsoknyi Rinpoche’s support and stabilize my mind in its empty nature.

Throughout the Training Guide, this color code is used:

Points in Turquoise are outer signs; red are Inner signs; Purple are secret signs. Green denotes practices that are appropriate at this time.
Blue denotes instructions for my Dharma friend.
The journey begins with experiencing the dissolution of the coarse body, its consciousnesses and the sense bases.
This is called:
The Four Instances:
earth into water, water into fire, fire into wind, wind into consciousness
Maintaining rigpa, the basic space of phenomena, without distraction is essential. Remember: All dissolution experiences in the bardos are simply projections of my mind.

Earth element (flesh & bones) dissolves into water element

• I feel physical and mental heaviness, as if I am being crushed
• Eye base, its consciousness and sight are vanishing
• Intense cracking resounds, as if a mountain is crumbling
• All that appears is like a mirage
• I can envision Rinpoche at my heart center and with devotion offer supplications

•Whispering in my ear, my Dharma friend can help me express “I’m experiencing
the process of death.”

Water element (blood, saliva, urine, etc.) dissolves into fire element

• I have leakage of fluids followed by intense thirst; the body is drying out
• Mind buzzes and is agitated; increasing irritability and loss of mental clarity
• Ear base, its consciousness and hearing are vanishing
• All that appears is smoke-like
• Sounds of great waves crashing resound
• I can envision Rinpoche at my navel center and with devotion offer supplications

• Whispering in my ear, my Dharma friend can help me recognize these signs

Fire element (warmth) dissolves into wind element

• My body rapidly goes from being hot to cold
• I can no longer speak
• My mental clarity vacillates; it’s hard to recognize people and I may have
hallucinations
• Nose base and its consciousness are disappearing
• All that appears is like fireflies or sparks
• Sounds of an immense fire storm resound
• I can envision Rinpoche at my forehead and with devotion offer supplications

• Whispering in my ear, my Dharma friend can help me recognize these signs

Wind element (breath) dissolves into consciousness

•My breath shortens, rattles and soon disappears
•My taste and tactile bases and their consciousnesses are vanishing
•All that appears is a brightly shining torch or butter lamp
• Sound like a dragon’s roar resounds
• Breath stops = clinical death
• Whispering in my ear, my Dharma friend needs to tell me this has happened and
it’s time to concentrate on the final dissolution that is now about to happen.

For the next three to 3 1/2 days my body should not be moved until death is completed with the inner dissolution of consciousness.

• The Kuntuzangpo prayer should be read at the conclusion of the three (+) days and its amulet is placed on my heart. If I have a “Bardo garb”, it should be burned on my body, along with all of my Dharma journals and notebooks when it is time for my cremation.

• If possible, Tsoknyi Rinpoche, or other lamas should be contacted to say prayers.

• Anis can be contacted through the Pundarika website to do weekly pujas from this point on through the 49 days. If a local lama or monk has been in attendance at my death ask him to continue as well.

• During this time the inner dissolution continues taking place as the white element from my father moves down to the heart and the red element from my mother moves up to the heart where they rest in union, squeezing out consciousness.

This is called: Appearance, Increase, Attainment, and Full Attainment
This phase of the Bardo of Dying marks the subtle dissolution and disappearance of
the consciousness of my conceptual, afflictive mind. With Full Attainment, I intend to experience the emergence of brilliant, unfabricated, non-conceptual dharmakaya. This is the natural, empty basic space of the self-cognizant nature of mind.

* The afflictive consciousnesses (6, 7, 8) of my mistaken thoughts and disturbing emotions now dissolve. The total dissolution of these consciousnesses, which comprise my dualistic mind (the ability to perceive, conceptualize, grasp onto objects, give rise to kleshas, and to project a self to others) and in particular the alaya-vijñāna (8th consciousness – the storehouse that carries my karmic seeds) are ceasing for this lifetime, just as the external breath in my physical body ceased previously.

* There are 4 stages: Appearance, Increase, Attainment, and Full Attainment
Each of these phases progressively dissolves the afflictions I have developed over lifetimes. The functions of my relative, conceptual mind are ceasing; my consciousness is ceasing to apprehend objects and engage conceptually with them. Finally, the samsaric appearances of this lifetime evaporate with the cessation of my
dualistic consciousness.

*What then bursts into appearance is limitless, pure, non-dual, non-conceptual, vivid
dharmakaya. It will appear brighter than 1000 or even 100,000 suns.
Appearance dissolves into the Mind of Increase: the Whiteness

• Vast and perfectly clear sky lit by a halo of light, also described as a luminous
white light, like a moonlit cloudless night

• All thoughts related to aggression cease

• Secret sign: nature of mind’s uncommon clarity free of concepts
• It’s helpful if my Dharma friend whispers in my ear: “No matter what
appearances arise, don’t attach to them. Maintain strong alertness and cut through appearances.”

Increase dissolves into Mind of Attainment: the Redness

• Luminous red light in a cloudless sky, like a beautiful sunrise
• All thoughts of passion and desire cease
• Secret signs: wisdom of increase, a natural ceasing of ignorance.
• Do not get drawn into this appearance…it is easy to get attached to its beauty! • It’s helpful if my Dharma friend whispers in my ear: “No matter what
appearances arise, don’t attach to them. Maintain strong alertness and cut through appearances.
Attainment dissolves into space: the Blackness
• Luminous dark sky without any sunlight, moonlight or starlight
• Thoughts related to ignorance cease and all conceptuality ceases
• Secret sign: wisdom of attainment, heightened experience of thought-free
indivisible bliss and clarity
• Again, it’s helpful if my Dharma friend whispers in my ear: “No matter what appearances arise, don’t attach to them. Maintain strong mindfulness and cut through appearances.”
• Inner respiration ceases, which is the actual point of my death and the end of this life.
• In this blackness it’s easy to fall unconsciousness and completely miss full attainment, waking up in the Bardo of Dharmata instead.
• I must remain mindful, stable and alert, for Full Attainment, my best chance for attaining enlightenment, is about to arise!
Full Attainment: space dissolves into Ground Luminosity
• This is the nature of Dharmakaya, free of limitations, dimensions or
characteristics
• Vast and open like a clear, luminous sky in autumn, brighter than thousands of
suns
• This is known as Ground of Dharmakaya and Mother Luminosity meeting the Child Luminosity I have experienced in rigpa practice. It is my empty essence, fully unveiled.
“Yogins who realize their very essence attain buddhahood once freed from the confines of the physical body.” Longchenpa, pg. 397

• This is when I can enter “five days” of non-distracted meditative concentration or tukdam. Its duration is measured by each “day” lasting as long as my meditation abides in non-conceptual wisdom times five (five minutes = 25 min). Without recognition of dharmakaya’s empty nature, each day is over in a second, with no opportunity to liberate.
• During tukdam my mind is still in the body, so I will appear asleep. There is warmth at the heart and there is no rigor mortis or smell during the time when my body is left in place.
• My Dharma friend needs to be aware of these signs indicating that my mind has not yet left the body and not disturb me or let anyone else disturb me.
• At the end of this phase, either intentionally or through the reactivation of the winds of karma, consciousness leaves the body through one of nine portals.“The red bindu continues its ascent and can sometimes be seen as blood coming out of the nose or mouth. The white bindu continues its descent and can sometimes be seen as a white discharge coming from the urethra. This separation of the red and white bindus releases the indestructible bindu at the heart, where consciousness is held.” Holecek, pg. 83
However, if I’m overwhelmed by the brightness of dharmakaya’s light, I will instantly fall unconscious and not have the opportunity to be liberated. Instead, I will wake up in the Bardo of Dharmata.
The Bardo of Luminous Dharmata
“Now when the bardo of dharmata dawns upon me,
I will abandon all thoughts of fear and terror,
I will recognize whatever appears as my projection
and know it to be a vision of the bardo; now that I have reached this critical point, I will not fear the peaceful and wrathful ones, my own projections.”

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The Tibetan Book of the Dead

• If I recognized my true nature in the Full Attainment experience of the Ground Luminosity, then I have attained enlightenment in the great original state of primordial purity and will not go into this next bardo.
• If I became unconscious & didn’t recognize the nature of my mind upon seeing the brilliant light of Ground Luminosity, I’ll wake up in the Bardo of Sambogakaya/ Suchness, the Bardo of Dharmata.

• The Ground Luminosity of Dharmakaya that appeared at the time of death during Full Attainment was completely pure in nature and had no appearance. Arising out of it is this next bardo, the Bardo of Dharmata, also called Bardo of Luminosity and Suchness. It has been likened to the Big Bang in that it’s full of densely packed dynamic energy. This is inherent buddha-nature expressed in sounds and lights and will rapidly emerge as form. It is “spontaneous presence,” out of which all phenomena of samsara and nirvana will arise, and into which they will eventually be reabsorbed.
• Expressions of wisdom-mind appear in this bardo because I’m now free of the ordinary eight consciousnesses and their reliance upon sense objects. It is the pure knowing of the suchness of everything, knowing the luminosity and empty nature even though there’s form.
• Sambogakaya luminosity, the unconditioned nature, is the essence of all the experiences in the Bardo of Dharmata including the frightening images. It will take meditative effort to realize these are from my own mind because they appear to be outside of me and as such will feel like the relative reality I’ve left behind.
• I must remember that all appearances are the nature of my mind and as such, are the basic space of phenomena that I have trained in during rigpa practice during this lifetime. In light of this, Rinpoche recommends watching scary movies to train in recognizing the illusory nature of fearsome images and experiences.
• At this point there still are opportunities to recognize the nature of my mind. However from here on, through the Karmic Bardo of Becoming, it will be increasingly more difficult for me to recognize the nature of mind. I need to remain alert, especially now as I encounter the experiences of spontaneous presence in their intrinsic dynamic forms and not in the forms I am used to.
The following are experiences I will encounter as they appear to Nyingma, Kagyu, Vajrayana and Dzogchen practitioner. Different images may be projected by practitioners of other lineages and non-Buddhists. These, like all else, are only projections of my mind; recognition of their empty nature will bring liberation.
• The hundred peaceful and wrathful (heruka) deities, which are manifestations of the wakefulness of spontaneous presence. These deities are unconditioned and composed of rainbow light, no matter how real or solid they appear.
• The five Buddha families: Vajra, Ratna, Padma, Karma, Buddha.

• The four wisdom lights of blue, yellow, red and white (the fifth, green, will not manifest here).
• Finally, wisdom, which is originally present within the ground of primordial purity, will dissolve into spontaneous presence.
If I depart the Bardo of Dharmata without attaining liberation, the last remaining possibility is:
The Karmic Bardo of Becoming
“Do not be distracted. This is the dividing line where Buddhas and sentient beings are separated. It is said of this moment: In an instant, they are separated, in an instant, complete
enlightenment.” The Tibetan Book of the Dead

This is the time to not be distracted by all that will be going on. Use as much effort as it takes to stay focused and still. Although it is difficult, non-distraction can bring liberation, even in this final bardo.

• In about 4 1⁄2 days my consciousness begins to wake up.

• Having no physical body, just a mental body with lifetimes of collected karmic patterns, I will be automatically tossed about by every subtle thought and emotion that arises. I will arrive instantly at any place my mind touches upon. This mental body is easily distracted and easily forgets what is going on and what has to be done to bring about liberation or a good rebirth.

• This can be a very disturbing and frightening experience if I lose mental stability and do not recognize my own mind’s nature. I must use any meditative strength I have to stay mentally clear and alert.

• My karma, based on my life and previous lives, will lead me to be reborn in one of the six realms: god, demi-god, human, animal, hungry ghost or one of the hells. None of these are eternal “places”, but are qualities of mind and samsaric states projected by minds. They are determined by my karma and at this point, by whatever ability I have to practice at this time.

• It is said that chanting Om Mani Padme Hum can close the door to the six realms.

• If I’ve made an aspiration for rebirth in a pure land, focus on it now and visualize it and its yidam. This is a very good choice – but I must practice for it to occur.

May I have a safe journey and a beneficial rebirth …..Om Mani Padme Hum!
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Tsoknyi Rinpoche

What is the best thing a student can do before death?

Refresh the teachings. Whatever you have received, go through your database of teachings and refresh it. There are a lot of teachings, but try to capture the essential points of what you have received. The main points are to be detached and to refresh your recognition of the nature of mind.

What is the best meditation to do before death?

For older students, find the nature of mind, which is mind beyond death and dying. This mind doesn’t die. Find that mind and rest there. For newer students, they can rest in meditation. Mostly it depends on each person, according to their own belief to create some hope. It’s ok to connect to your own belief to find some peace.
What is the best thing to do when someone is actually dying?
There are several options here. One option is if you have a yidam, you can grab onto that. By doing that, the yidam binds your mind. Again, whatever is happening, whatever is dissolving, the best thing is to maintain the unborn mind, the recognition of mind. Don’t be afraid of the dissolution. Things may be dissolving but you are resting in the nature of mind which is beyond dissolution and death.

What is the best thing for the sangha to do to help the dying person?

If you know the person’s yidam, that is very good. Invoke the mind of the yidam, and mix your mind, the mind of the dying person, and the mind of the yidam together – then rest in the nature of mind. That is a very big support for the one who is dying.

Should the sangha do the yidam practice along with dying person?

Yes. If the helping person is familiar [with] and understands the yidam practice, then they can remind the dying person of the qualities of the yidam. It is also helpful to recite the mantra of the yidam. The dying person can recite it and the sangha at the side of the dying person can rest in it with them….It is also good to read vajra songs and doha [songs] of fearlessness. Beginner practitioners can also do this. Read teachings on mahamudra, dzogchen, and other inspiring readings, along with the Tibetan Book of the Dead.

The helping person has to have some kind of intuition and be able to adjust according to the person who is dying. If they are Christian, say something to connect them with God. If they are Buddhist, say something to help them connect to the underlying mind. If they are a free thinker, then help them connect with the peace in their mind in order to let go of fear. You have to see and understand the person in order to know how to best say: “Relax, let it go”.
Provide what gives them hope beyond life – whether it’s God, the pure lands, or the underlying, unchanging mind. Most importantly, the helping person needs to use their intuition and wisdom to properly convey what they understand, and to match the belief of the dying person.

What’s the best thing to do when someone wakes up in the bardo after death?

The first thing to do is to recognize that you are dead. Secondly, you should know that all the phenomena that you are experiencing now are bardo phenomena. Know that everything is the expression of your own mind. Think to yourself “I’m not going to go crazy with the expressions of my mind. I’m going to try to find the nature of my own mind, which is beyond the delusion.” Everything that is happening is the expression of your mind. It is better to not get caught up in that expression but to capture the seat of the nature of mind.

What is the best thing that sangha can do to support someone after they have died?

In a general way, every week you can do practices for them, because every week they have a chance to change their life, to change the course of their bardo experience. The most important thing for changing in the bardo is to know that they have lived their life properly and can therefore let go of that life with confidence. On that day you can do more puja or prayers, or you can go through the Tibetan Book of the Dead, day by day. If you can read it in the house where they live, where they spent the most time, that is best, because they usually come back to familiar places. They probably will not recognize that they are dead, and then they may click onto some good things, like remembering the teachings and what they should do.
Any final comments, Rinpoche, if you were at the side of someone who was dying?

Two things. First, if they are willing to hear your advice, then give them hope. Tell them that the relative is dying, the ultimate is not dying. Give them hope that they can recognize the ultimate, the nature of their mind, the mind that is unchanging and undying. You have to give a little promotion on the deathless side. Secondly, then the
phenomena of this life that they are leaving, that they used properly – just let it go.
Holecek, pgs. 303 – 306

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From Joan Halifax, who has worked with the dying for over 30 years:

“The concept of a good death can put unbearable pressure on dying people and caregivers, and can take us away from death’s mystery and the richness of not knowing. Our expectation of how someone should die can give rise to subtle or direct coerciveness. No one wants to be judged for how well she dies! “Death with dignity” is another concept that can become another obstacle to what is really happening. Dying can be very undignified. Often, it’s not dignified at all, with spoiled bedclothes and sheets, bodily fluids and flailing, nudity and strange sexuality, confusion and rough language…good death, death with dignity – can be unfortunate fabrications that we use to protect ourselves against the sometimes raw and wondrous truth of dying. “

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Kuntuzangpo’s Prayer: www.youtube.com/watch?v=TSbldGbH3Ok ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Bibliography:

Reproduced from The Pundarika Foundation
The Bardo Supplication by the Lord of the Conquerors Kunga Paljor, source for oral Bardo
Teachings by Tsoknyi Rinpoche
Dying with Confidence, Anyen Rinpoche
Freedom in Bondage, Erik Pema Kunsang and Marcia Schmidt
Kindness, Clarity, and Insight, The Dalai Lama
Life in Relation to Death, Chagdud Rinpoche
Mind Beyond Death, Dzogchen Ponlop
Mirror of Mindfulness, Tsele Natsok Rangdrol and Erik Pema Kunsang
Preparing to Die, Andrew Holecek
Rest for the Fortunate, Bardor Tulku Rinpoche
The Precious Treasury of The Way of Abiding, Longchen Rabjam
The Precious Treasury of The Basic Space of Phenomena, Longchen Rabjam
Tibetan Book of Living and Dying, Sogyal Rinpoche
Tibetan Book of the Dead, various translations; the most useful is: an adaptation by Jean-Claude van Itallie, Tibetan Book of the Dead for Reading Aloud
Treasures from Juniper Ridge, Padmasambhava

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“How can you hate and delete people and be on the journey toward inner peace?
Forgive everyone, clear the karma. Recontact them and heal it, tell them you hold no negativity. Even if you didn’t like what they did. They are not their conduct. Everyone that you had some connection with your exes, family, siblings even if they have died their karmic traces live in you, so heal it, show appreciation. Maybe you shared some good moments? Heal it all. You are powerful, your love, your compassion.
Learn from the ones that trigger you- Shed light on light.”

Tenzin Wangyal Rinpoche, Crestone October, 2023

 

This quote was from one of my spiritual teachers on retreat this year. He’s speaking to the callous tendency for people to have a very low tolerance for conflict and to use social media to be blocking and discarding people, wantonly. He actually suggested for us to unblock people, and even recontact all old exes, friends and relatives who we may be estranged from and heal any hurt, conflict or karma. Furthermore, he wanted us to do this even if they have passed, heal it in your mind or ceremonially. I agree with him, and one of my other teachers told me that part of our Bodhisattva vow is that we are obligated to resolve conflict or pain with someone if we can, even if it wasn’t our fault. I wrote an article about living and dying without regret here.

This is very noble, a true Buddha’s mind and heart would always be open, vast, compassionate, and welcoming, with no karmic entanglements. This is a very big, HOWEVER, when it comes to relating with narcissistic people, the normal relational rules change dramatically.

Idealize, Devalue, Discard, Hoover- Rinse and Don’t Repeat

Most of us understand, by now, the basic patterning of what it’s like to have been in contact with the person who is high on the narcissistic spectrum. Unfortunately, people with these disorders are not capable of having healthy, supportive, equitable relationships. Narcissistic or antisocial people are caught in a painful repeating cycle of: Love bombing, idealize and then devaluing and insulting you and then when you confront them or can see behind their mask, they will usually have a narcissistic rage or injury. Right in the midst of the emotional attack, which can be brutal, they will typically block, discard or silence you. Then, there are the infamous smear campaigns to justify what they did, and sometimes they will try to hook or hoover you back into their lair, for another cat and mouse batting.

There is no way to break this pattern, and there’s nothing that you can do to heal it by fixing them. Let me repeat: “There is no way to break this pattern, and there’s nothing that you can do to heal it by fixing them.”

Narcissistic or antisocial people flourish by having a target of blame to hide their hidden shadow. They often have an inflated, grandiose sense of self, can do no wrong, have no empathy, conscience, or accountability. They very rarely ever seek help or therapy, and any apologies are typically used as a manipulation tactic to hoover you back in to the cycle.

I really believe that there are even sadistic tendencies, they actually enjoy knowing that they have power and control over you and receive narcissistic supply by you staying hurt, disempowered or even disabled. It’s not about love, it’s a game of who wins. As much as we may genuinely love this person, appreciate them and are hurting, we’re simply caught in a very powerful, toxic trauma bond of longing to heal.

However, there’s no way to heal it relationally with a person who is disordered. Narcissists and antisocials are different, we must see that and love and value ourselves enough to get out. The only way to heal is to stop re-traumatizing ourselves, and rebuild our inner foundation that was broken by being in contact, and being emotionally vulnerable to a narcissist.

trauma-bond-list

Reality Testing List

There are a few ways to heal if you feel an overwhelming amount of unprocessed grief and emotion after you’ve been discarded. One way is to write a long letter to the narcissist, never send it and then burn it ceremonially and wish them well. Secondly, since we were emotionally gaslit, it’s hard to remember all the hurtful things that transpired, so it’s a good idea to make a REALITY list of the hurt, abuse and their disordered conduct. Keep that on your phone and read it whenever you feel any hope that you could resolve it with this person that hurt you, so thoroughly and deeply. The first list, name it: “This is Not Love, This is a Trauma Bond“. Then in contrast, write a second list called “I Call In Genuine Love.” In the second list, talk about the qualities of genuine love and respect that you would like to create in your life and in all relationships.

5 Ways to Go No Contact

Going no contact with a narcissist can be challenging, but is often necessary for your mental and emotional well-being, and healing cannot really begin if we keep exposing our nervous systems to harm. I know it’s hard, and seems uncompassionate, but we must know and finally admit that these people DO NOT LOVE US.  Here are five ways to go no contact with a narcissist and why it’s important to heal:

  1. Block Communication: Block their phone number, email, and ALL social media accounts. Make it difficult for them to reach out to you.
  2. Set Boundaries: Inform mutual friends and family members about your decision to go no contact, and ask for their support in not relaying messages from the narcissist.
  3. Remove Triggers: Get rid of reminders of the narcissist, such as gifts, photos, and belongings that may evoke painful memories.
  4. Seek Professional Help: Consider therapy, counseling or coaching to help you cope with the emotional aftermath of the relationship and develop strategies for healing.
  5. Focus on Self-Care: Invest in self-care activities that promote your emotional and physical well-being. This may include exercise, meditation, journaling, and spending time with supportive friends and family, to rebuild your emotional and physical well-being.

Why it’s imperative to heal after narcissistic abuse:

  1. Recovery from Emotional Abuse: Narcissists engage in devastating emotional abuse, manipulation, and gaslighting that can damage or break the foundation of our being. Healing allows us to regain our self-esteem and self-worth.
  2. Break the Cycle: Going no or low contact breaks the trauma bond and cycle of abuse and codependency, allowing you to build healthier relationships in the future.
  3. Your Mental Health: Narcissistic abuse can lead to depression, anxiety, physical problems, PTSD and CPTSD. Healing is essential to address these emotional and mental health issues and move forward.
  4. Personal Growth: Be grateful that this happened! Why? The process of healing can lead to personal growth, self-discovery and genuine spiritual evolution. You can learn from the experience and become a stronger, more resilient and compassionate individual.
  5. Protect Your Well-Being: Fall in love with your life! Prioritizing your healing helps protect your overall well-being and allows you to live a happier, more fulfilling life. You can give yourself the love and care that you were longing for in the toxic connection.
Certainly, going no or low contact with a narcissist can be a crucial step in protecting your well-being and emotional health. Additionally, understanding concepts like “gray rock” and low contact or “yellow rock” can be helpful in managing interactions with a narcissist. It can be very difficult if you are in a painful divorce with someone like this or if you have to co-parent. It might not be possible to have no contact, and in that case you can do something called Gray Rock which is short, curt, minimal words with no emotional response. Tina Swithen, from OneMomsBattle.com, coined the term called Yellow Rock, and that means that you use a similar, flat non-emotional response as in gray rock. But in yellow rocking, you include social niceties like “hope you’re doing well, have a great day,” so there’s not an inference of passive aggression.

 

Yellow-Rock

What is Gray Rock and Low Contact (Yellow Rock)?

  • Gray Rock: Gray rock is a technique used when you must have some contact with a narcissist, such as in co-parenting or work situations. It involves becoming emotionally unresponsive and as boring as a gray rock. You avoid showing strong emotions or engaging in drama, making yourself an uninteresting target for the narcissist’s manipulation.
  • Low Contact or Yellow Rock: Low contact means limiting contact with a narcissist to the bare minimum necessary, typically for legal, social, practical or unavoidable reasons. You reduce communication to what is strictly required, avoiding unnecessary engagement to minimize exposure to their toxicity, and include the basic social formality.

Both gray rock and yellow rock, or low contact, can be strategies to protect yourself from the negative effects of a narcissist while maintaining some level of interaction when going fully no contact is not possible or practical. I know from first-hand experience, this whole process is very difficult. We always want to see the good in people, and we always long to resolve conflict. However, we must understand thoroughly that narcissistic or antisocial people actually thrive on conflict and no resolve is possible.

Internal No Contact, Where it Really Matters

Having been discarded, we do tend to ruminate and it never feels resolved. We have to find a way to uncover inner peace, health, and wellness even after this type of abuse. No contact isn’t just about social media blocking, it’s about not giving that person any more mental or emotional energy.

There’s an old story of two celibate monks who encountered a beautiful woman at the foot of a small river that they needed to cross. One of the monks offers to pick her up and brings her across the river and drops her off at the other side. After about a mile of walking, his friend says “you know it’s against our monastic vows for you to have picked up that woman like that.” The monk replies “I dropped her off a mile ago, why are you still carrying her with you?” The ultimate no contact is to let them go from your mind and heart. We can wish them well, and pray that through education and social awareness, that we learn to spot these types of people and don’t get entrapped by toxic people or patterns.

It’s also important to remember that healing and seeking professional support from a therapist, support group or coach, are crucial, regardless of the level of contact you maintain with a narcissist. With education, no contact and self-care, very deep and profound emotional and soul-level healing, over time is not only possible, but… probable.

Warmest healing wishes to all in your recovery!

Please listen to my personal story.

October is the National Domestic Violence Awareness Month

October was first declared as National Domestic Violence Awareness Month in 1989. Since then, October has been a time to acknowledge domestic violence survivors and be a voice for its victims, and I wanted to compile a list of resources for those in need. Domestic violence is prevalent in every community, and affects all people regardless of age, socio-economic status, sexual orientation, gender, race, religion, or nationality and way more ubiquitous than previously understood.

Physical violence is often accompanied by emotionally abusive and controlling behavior and silencing as part of a much larger, systematic pattern of dominance and control and can happen in interpersonal relationships, families and organizational communities like a church. Domestic violence can result in physical injury, psychological trauma, deep lifelong wounding and even sadly, death. The devastating consequences of domestic violence can cross generations and last a lifetime, but there is help and hope, you are not alone!

161024-N-OQ305-004

Although there has been substantial progress in reducing domestic violence, the numbers are shocking. There is an average of 20 people who are physically abused by intimate partners every minute! This equates to more than 10 million abuse victims annually. These numbers, and my own experience as a survivor, inspire me to do whatever I can to help vulnerable fellow women and children to seek healing and safety.

1 in 3 women and 1 in 4 men have been physically abused by an intimate partner, and 1 in 5 women and 1 in 7 men have been severely physically abused by an intimate partner.

Millions of Americans, mostly women, live like I did in daily, silent fear within their own homes. In addition, every year millions of children are exposed to domestic violence, and they often go unnoticed, with no adult to protect them. I wish, in retrospect, that someone had seen the signs in my family and intervened. People also know about child abuse and, mindbogglingly, do nothing about it.

Domestic violence incidents affect every person within a home and can have long-lasting negative effects on children’s emotional well-being, and social and academic functioning. We must shed light here now. Please listen to my personal story above about hurt and hope, and get help now.

The National Child Traumatic Stress Network (NCTSN) has compiled a list of helpful resources for parents and caregivers, children and teens, mental health providers, child welfare workers, law enforcement professionals, educators and school staff, and policymakers.

https://www.nctsn.org/what-is-child-trauma

CRISIS SUPPORT

Crisis situations often stem from multiple unaddressed issues with a person’s ability to exist comfortably in their environment. Whether you are in crisis, approaching crisis, or supporting someone in crisis — slow down, take a moment to sense what is happening in your body, and remember that you do not need to navigate this alone.

PROJECT LETS PEER SUPPORT SERVICES:

https://projectlets.org/resources

Text 401-400-2905 for urgent support with psychiatric incarceration/involuntary hospitalization.

OTHER CRISIS RESOURCES:

• Create a safety plan or Psychiatric Advance Directive
• Peer Respite Centers
• Emergency Action for Panic Attacks
• Questions to Ask Before Giving Up
• Crisis Information: Important Stuff to Know Beyond Awareness
• The Project LETS Crisis Approach

The National Domestic Violence Hotline

This is the foremost first step for people experiencing Domestic Violence (D.V.) Call the National Domestic Violence Hotline at:

1−800−799−7233 or TTY 1−800−787−3224.

Call 1.800.799.SAFE (7233)Chat live now
Text “START” to 88788

domestic-violence-help

https://www.thehotline.org/

 

D.V. can happen to couples who are married, living together or who are dating.  Domestic violence affects people of all socio-economic backgrounds and education levels. If there is no physical or sexual assault, sometimes the abuse is covert, and very hard to recognize.

Abuse is a repetitive pattern of behaviors to maintain power and control over an intimate partner. These are behaviors that physically harm, arouse fear, prevent a partner from doing what they wish or force them to behave in ways they do not want. Abuse includes the use of physical and sexual violence, threats and intimidation, emotional abuse, silencing and secrecy and economic exploitation or deprivation. Many of these different forms of abuse can be going on at any one time and can be in families or entire communities. Abuse can have life-long scars, but with awareness, treatment and support, we can learn to heal and be safe.

The Power & Control Wheel of Abusive Relationships

This was given to me a few years back by a counselor. Think of the wheel as a diagram of the tactics your abusive partner, family member or community uses to keep you in the relationship. While the inside of the wheel consists of subtle, continual behaviors, the outer ring represents physical, visible violence. These are the abusive acts that are more overt and forceful, and often the intense acts that reinforce the regular use of other subtler methods of abuse. This was very insightful because abuse can happen even if it is covert. It took me YEARS to see this and I’m beginning to stop recreating this in my life. Please get help if you are in an abusive relationship or community, you are not alone, regaining your strength and healing is possible!

power-and-control-wheel-updated

The Living Recovery Program

I’m taking this program right now, created by a fellow survivor, Sandra Brown, and it has been very helpful for domestic violence survivors, and survivors of narcissistic/psychopathic/Cluster B personality disordered abuse.

https://saferelationshipsmagazine.com/living-recovery-program-4

4PuzzlePieces-01-09

https://vpc.org/studies/wmmw2020.pdf

*Correction, in the Youtube audio journal, I mention “Ventral Vagal,” I meant to say “Dorsal Vagal.”

Nontheism and the Nature of Deities and Demons

PLEASE LISTEN TO THE VIDEO HERE: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Kfl2QVIn_KE

 

 

“There is no evil. It’s relative. There aren’t any truly evil people. The ones that hurt need the most help, not punishment, they need our kindness.”

Tenzin Wangyal Rinpoche 9-15-23, Crestone, Colorado

transcript (00:00):
Greetings everyone. This is Dawn Boiani-Sandberg, and I’m speaking tonight from Crestone, Colorado. I’m doing a meditation retreat with Tenzin Wangyal Rinpoche, and I had done a retreat a week ago with Tsoknyi Rinpoche, and there’s an interesting topic that’s been swirling around in my mind about deities and demons. I have a lot of information and reflection that I wanted to share with you and an audio journal about my religion, which is Tibetan Buddhism, Tibetan tantric Buddhism. And just examine with me- what is the nature of deity and a demon? What are our tantric vows? Do they help us to uncover a sense of inner confidence in healing or do at times some of the heavy handed punishment models and afterlife fears, wind up exacerbating and re-triggering very early childhood wounding from our culture? So these are the types of things I’d love to sort of dive into, if you will.

(01:22):
Thanks for sharing your time with me. So I wanted to start with contemplating what it is to be a Tibetan tantric Buddhist. How do you see the world and what is the nature of phenomenon? What is the nature of ourselves? And likewise, what’s the nature of all these deities that we see on our shrines and in the monasteries? We have a very elaborate practice that we do when we received an empowerment where we have very complex visualizations and mantras and we have a lot of deities. So what are these deities? Do they really exist in an ultimate way? Are they cultural based? Who and what are they? So this is a very interesting and juicy topic. I’d like to explore that first before we get into the demon part. So the deities, the way that it was explained to me was that they were anthropomorphized versions of wisdom and they’re culturally referenced.

(02:38):
So you might be praying to an image of Tara or Guru Rinpoche or a lot of different deities exist in Tibetan tantric pantheon. And if you look at the origin of them, most of them come from India or they were people that lived and died historically and attained enlightenment. And they all have different qualities, properties, they all look different. So do we believe in a whole pantheon of gods and ghouls and deities just like the Greco-Romans, or are they the same as the Hindu deities? Do we worship and pray to these beings as really existing? There was a conversation I was having recently on Reddit, and someone had asked, well, the Tibetans had done so many prayers to the protectors when the Maoists were invading and China was invading, and how come the protectors didn’t help the Tibetans? And I replied, well, because the power and efficacy of our practices are only relevant when we are cultivating that energy within us, and then we act in our lives to help the world.

(04:03):
We don’t just pray to a deity like God to make everything feel better. So as far as I was told, I went to the school at Naropa and studied Buddhist studies there. Tibetan Buddhists, even though we have a pantheon of deities, ultimately we are called non theists. And what is non theism? Non theism is explained to me as being we’re not exactly atheists. So we don’t just say there’s absolutely no gods and no mysticism in the world, and we’re just kind of like super evidence-based science. No magic, no nothing. When you die, it’s just lights out. It’s kind of the atheistic approach. But in Buddhism, we’re called non theists, which is a little bit different. It has explained to me as we don’t actually deny the existence of beings that people have related to throughout different cultures and different times, but we regard them as being fundamentally empty and a projection of awakened mind.

(05:23):
And that could be said for everything that ever exists, you me, a glass, all this stuff is simply a projection of mind. I recall in the Tibetan book of the Dead, when you die or when you begin the dying process, the mind will start to see all kinds of images and deities, and the instruction is always to look down at the ground and the root of that projection. And then anything that you’re seeing will subside in the ground because the origin, it’s like the allegory of the cave, Plato’s allegory of the cave where you look directly at the root projector, not the imagery. So the nature of the deities is a projection of mind and energy, but they’re fundamentally empty. They don’t have any substantial existence. They’re more like apparitions of light that are projected by our mind. So that’s what it means to me to be a non theist and to be relating with a sadana practice where you’re evoking a particular quality of energy. On my retreat, I’ve actually seen things, I’m not really supposed to speak of them, but I’ve sort of seen images of deities and different things kind of pop into space, but I never regarded them as being outside of me, like me versus deity, like this dualistic thing. It seemed more of like a non-dual projection of empty energy. So that’s my understanding of the nature of deities and basically all phenomenon.

What is “Good and Evil”

(07:23):
Did these things help us? Well, as long as our understanding is correct, where we’re still holding the second turning of understanding of emptiness and phenomenon, I do think a lot of these images and these deities are culturally referenced. I recall trunk ache saying once that the energy of a protector may appear to someone to be like a general, so they don’t have a concrete solid reality. It’s their projections of our culture and our time. So that’s to answer the question as to why on Reddit, the protectors didn’t help the Tibetans. Well, it’s kind of like the old adage. God helps those that help themselves. If we are supplicating the energy and quality of a deity, that’s to fortify that with us so that we can have the skillful activity. They call it the four karmas of you’re able to pacify, rich, magnetize and destroy. So when you do so practice, you are opening up dormant efficacy and compassionate activity within you.

In Our Times of Pain Or Stress, Stay with Evidence Based Science

(08:45):
So that’s been my understanding. Correct me if I’m wrong, please do. I think it’s always an open question, but do they help us? So I think that if your understanding is clear that you never forget about the nature of emptiness and the nature of phenomenon, then I think it’s healthy where it can get kind of difficult. I’ll give you a personal example is I had what I believe was a long covid complication and I was having terrible neuropathy. I was having pins and needles in the hands and the feet and kind of just this intermittent pain that was shooting. And I never knew when this electric shock would come and it was really destabilizing and I couldn’t sleep through the pain. And I remember laying there, I moved out of my husband in my bedroom into the shrine room, and I kept these candles lit all night long, these electric candles.

(09:52):
And I was laying there and I couldn’t sleep. And I was feeling extremely uncomfortable and frightened. And the only thing that I could think about after being a Tibetan Buddhist for 30 years was, oh, I’m being punished for breaking my tantric vows. So I’m actually being electrocuted as an existential punishment for some of the things that we’ve been discussing through the Me Too movement. And I wound up speaking to Sni Rinpoche about it, and he said, that’s ridiculous. You’re physical pain is not, you’re not being punished and prodded by a pitchfork. And I was kind of sad because after practicing Tibetan Buddhism for 30 years at the time of need where my practice should have provided an existential solace and comfort and sort of a connection to the vastness or compassion or patience or any quality whatsoever when I needed it most, it was actually a source of I was feeling, I was being punished and it was a source of poison in my mind rather than a source of benefit.

(11:07):
So at times where you might be having physical pain, another friend was just battling with anxiety, very acute anxiety, and he says, I’m having really bad karma, I’m being punished. And I said, you know what? When you’re having something to be kicked up like this, it’s not time for religious mental stuff. It’s time to stay in very grounded evidence-based science. Don’t look at everything like gods and demons and karmic purification. I mean, that’s just kind of madness and it can wind up creating harm and confusion if we start just imagining gul and goblins and deities and karmic punishments.

(11:52):
So I think it’s probably better to stay in very earthy evidence-based reality, especially in times of stress or sickness. I think that when I started to feel that I was somehow stained or bad, that wound up triggering some of the things that I had been through when I was young. As I’ve mentioned before in some of my previous audio recordings, I grew up in a very emotionally and physically abusive family and culture on the East coast, and I was the family scapegoat. I’ve been talking about that recently. So whenever I start to doubt myself, I start to feel like I’m bad or I’ve broken my vows. That’s not really helping me to heal and acknowledge that I’m fundamentally a good person with a good heart that speaks for ethics, maybe in an unconventional or forthright way. But I know that my heart and my practice are sound.

Early Childhood Judeo- Christian “Basic Badness”

(13:07):
And when I use my tantric vows to create self-doubt, that becomes a poison within my system. So it’s not helpful to think that we’re bad and whether or not we’re good or bad. It’s so funny because I’ve been somewhat of a public person. Whenever I produce something, I have at least 20 to 50 people reading it, so it’s not really, my work doesn’t really go viral, but I do, I’m quite public about what’s been going on after the Me Too movement with my Tibetan Buddhist community. And I’ve been speaking with the voice of trying to reform things because there’s been a lot that was exposed that could be improved because I value my practice, these sadana practices that we’re talking about, my teachers, some of my teachers, excuse me, I feel that things need to change or the tradition could continue to wane. And it’s been hard for me because if you put out an opinion in a tradition that we are supposed to stay silent and secret, it goes into the mass community and people will offer feedback, and the feedback hasn’t been great for me, and that’s hurt a lot.

(14:43):
A lot of people have left. A lot of people consider themselves survivors of sex assault or exploitative power dynamics. There’s lots been coming up about child abuse in the monasteries and child abuse in different Buddhist communities worldwide, and it’s extremely painful. I’ve deduced that there’s only four options to deal with this. The first one is to stay silent, see no evil, hear no evil. You could walk away. A lot of my friends have left the Tibetan Buddhist tradition and feel like the whole thing is fundamentally corrupt because of the power dynamics and the silencing and secrecy. Or you could try to fix it. That’s the one I’m taking. So I’m thinking like passion, aggression and ignorance. And I guess the fourth option would be to just have a very vast mind and allow it all to happen without trying to alter it. That’s generally the view.

Dakini or Demon?- It’s All Projection

(15:52):
However, the critique in that view to not do anything is silence, is consent, silence is complicity. Knowing that we have abuse in our tradition hurts me physically, emotionally, spiritually, and psychologically. And I really would wish and pray that we would have a consensual open conversation and accountability and willingness to change. That hasn’t happened yet, unfortunately. So it’s funny, with my particular role being somewhat public with my 50 followers, people have said to me various things like, oh my God, I am a Tibetan apologist. I’ve had a number of people say I was going to hell by talking about child abuse in the monasteries. People in the Tibetan tradition like Kempos and GEs, I’ve had a friend recently call me a demon. Within the same week, my teacher called me a dakini and said I was a teacher. So I get it’s licorice. Some people really feel that I am exposing things that they would really rather keep secret and silent, and I’m destroying the tradition.

(17:18):
And other people say that the work that I’ve done is heartfelt, authentic, and not unintelligent. One teacher, he said, I was a dakini and a teacher, so am I a demon or a dakini. He thinks that I’m probably neither a demon or a dakini. I think that probably a lot of these things are the projection of the beholder. And so I’m trying to not internalize such dichotomous strong blessings and curses from the peanut gallery. So we have to be ourselves. We have to be true to our own heart, speak and do the things that we feel adheres with our own ethics and our own talent in this world. And I do care about my Tibetan Buddhist tradition. I do care about all of my friends that are participating in it. I don’t want any of them to feel trapped. I don’t want children to be hurt, and I also don’t want the tradition to continue to wane.

(18:29):
A number of dharma centers are shutting down worldwide or they’re not being funded properly. So unless there is some fundamental change and ability to talk about stuff, I fear that within a generation or two it’s going to wane. I spoke to my ER brother, Eric Pema Kang, kind of a famous vaiana teacher from Denmark. And we agreed that the next generation of Tibetans really aren’t holding this tradition. It’s waning in the West. I talked to  Tsoknyi. He says, a lot of the Tibetan families are not offering their children to the monasteries and the census is down. So I see the whole thing kind of petering out in a generation or two and some of the survivors and people who’ve left in a really hurt and angry way, they would be more than happy to see the tradition wiped off the face of the earth. I don’t personally feel that.

(19:31):
I feel great sadness for the plight of the Tibetan sin exile, and I think that the culture should be preserved. The language, the rituals, the color, the display, the magic, the power. It’s so fantastic and it’s such a big part of my life that I don’t want to ever let go of, but I have to let go of the toxic stuff like I’m a demon. People calling me for making videos like this. Some friends won’t speak to me anymore. They blocked me because I’ve spoken out against child abuse and said, Hey, maybe some of these teachers need to not be acting in such a really heavy handed, cruel, sometimes even psychopathic. Some of these guys are really out there and they wind up tainting the ones that actually are really super gentle. So it’s a mixed bag of so much color and display. So I think that it will take some time to resolve all the things that have arisen in our tradition, and it probably won’t be resolved within my lifetime.

(20:57):
So I think just in general, if a lot of us came into the Dharma as refugee refugees with a lot of pain and a lot of longing and a lot of trust and a lot of hope, and we hoped for something that would help us like a medicine, something that was magical and fantastic and transformational, we were told that we could attain enlightenment within one lifetime. It sounds really good, although myself included, and a lot of my friends were finding now 20, 30, 40 years later, that a lot of these practices didn’t quite result in the qualities of accomplishment that we were hoping to after all these years. And what I realized was I used my religion basically as a spiritual bypass, and that is you have a lot of dormant wounding. I came from child abuse and then I would meditate and take empowerments, and then I thought I was really spiritual and really accomplished, and I thought I was some hot dini that had studied with the great masters, and I thought I was kind of better than everybody else, sort of because I had this great noble birth and all this privilege.

Archaic Religion with vows and punishments don’t help to heal

(22:21):
So I used the dharma and my relationship with Tibetan or Vajrayana Buddhism as a credential in how I regarded myself. And it turned out that that whole thinking crashing down. And I realized that I had very, very deep childhood wounding that I had blocked out. That is all coming up now as I’m getting older. And I’ve been having to really just deal with whether or not I’m a lovable person, whether or not I have this basic goodness, whether or not I’m evil, stained, bad, unlovable. So just very, very early imprints like that that came from my family of origin. And some of this heavy handed stuff, as I said before, isn’t necessarily helping the stain in your tantric vows and demon, all this kind of stuff. It’s just not that helpful for me. So I’m basically going to the essence of my practice in a really simple way that just allows everything to settle down and open. And I believe that that’s the essence of my teacher and the essence compassion where those qualities of healing can really take place.

(23:54):
As far as demons and deities, I believe that they are projections of mind. When people are in one week, I get a mixed message from different people, they project onto you. But I think that from my practice that everything, when you do your practice, everything can kind of resolve into that ground of clarity, openness, and emptiness. And I think that that’s a good place to train in and to rest. And I think that by training in that way, free from a lot of the heavy handed cultural stuff that can be really hateful, shunning people, judging people, deifying people, demonizing people, this whole stuff is just a projection of a lot of mental calisthenics.

What is Enlightenment?

(24:55):
The things that bring qualities of tenderness, openness, authenticity, and ethics would be the path that I want to continue to take as a tantric Buddhist. And I do think the tree needs to be heavily pruned from a lot of stuff that has been adopted, that is culture that wounds up, that winds up re-triggering a lot of that basic badness from our Judeo-Christian culture. Or if you did grow up in a family where there was abuse, we don’t want to have a community that upholds unhealthy tenants. We want to have a community that’s healthy, transparent, loving, and truly ethical. And we haven’t quite gotten there yet, but I will pray that I’ll be able to see that within my lifetime. So thank you so much for listening~


Buddha: https://www.pexels.com/photo/buddha-thangka-painting-on-textile-14441347/

Impossible™ Meat with Cheese and Tomato Puff Pastries

We were invited to dinner one night and our friends produced this absolutely decadent vegetable filled puff pastry entrée. Here I have modified the recipe to use Impossible™ meat, and it’s just as good! I have found that sharp white cheddar is the most flavorful, but feel free to replace the dairy with dairy-free vegan options. There are a lot of ingredients but once they are all put together it actually cooks up very quickly so it’s an easy-to-make entrée that’s served best with a fresh green garden salad.

INGREDIENTS:

  • 1 12 oz. packet of Impossible™ ground plant based ground meat or any ground veg. meat
  • 1 carton of Pepperidge Farm or Dufour puff pastry defrosted
  • 2 large heirloom organic tomatoes
  • 1/2 c.olive oil and or ghee
  • 1/2 red pepper chopped
  • 2 small carrots chopped
  • 1/2 onion chopped
  • 8 large slices of sharp white cheddar or Havarti or sharp vegan cheese
  • 1 egg
  • 1/2 t. Herbs de Provence
  • 1/2 t. onion powder
  • 2 garlic cloves
  • Salt and Pepper to taste
  • 1 vegetable bouillon cube
  • 2 small fingerling potatoes, finely diced
  • 1 cup (0.24 l) of heavy cream or unsweetened creamy oat milk

puff-pastry

INSTRUCTIONS:

  1. Preheat oven to 350 degrees F
  2. Cut one medium size onion, the same amount of carrot, and one small potato (I used two yellow fingerling potatoes) into small pieces and sauté them in a pot. (I use Ghee.)
  3. Cut two garlic cloves into small pieces and add them when the rest is almost ready
  4. Transfer this mixture to a glass bowl
  5. In the same pot, fry one pound of Impossible meat
  6. Add some olive oil ( 3 – 4 tablespoons)
  7. Season with salt, Herbs de Provence, pepper, onion powder, and a portion of a vegetable bouillon cube (maybe a third of a cube)
  8. Add one finely cut up red bell pepper
  9. Once done, transfer this to the same bowl
  10. Add one egg and 2 – 3 tablespoons of heavy whipping cream and mix all of it
  11. Roll out the pastry: one carton (each contains one sheet). Don’t roll them too thin or the pastries will break when you transfer them to a baking tray
  12. Cut each sheet so that you obtain 4 rectangles (so 8 total)
  13. Distribute the filling, use two heaping tablespoons per square
  14. Add tomato slices (two slices of a large heirloom tomato)
  15. Sprinkle salt and pepper on the tomato slices – not too much salt, though, because we are going to add cheese.
  16. Add cheese (I used sliced Havarti)
  17. Fold the pastry over and close it into pouches
  18. Whatever way you have to make a seam
  19. I start at one end of the seam and pull the edges with my fingers, folding them over themselves until I reach the end of the seam
  20. Put on a baking tray lined with parchment paper and bake in a pre-heated oven at 350 F for 45 min to an hour (I have also made them at 400 degrees for 30 minutes if you don’t have much time)
  21. Paint the pastries with egg, oil, or ghee 5 minutes before serving
  22. Cool for 5 mins. before serving, best with a fresh green garden salad.

Serves 4.

puff-pastry-impossible

puff-pastry-impossible

Impossible Meat with Cheese and Tomato Puff Pastries

We were invited to dinner one night and our friends produced this absolutely decadent vegetable filled puff pastry entrée. Here I have modified the recipe to use Impossible™ meat, and it's just as good! I have found that sharp white cheddar is the most flavorful, but feel free to replace dairy with dairy-free vegan options. There are a lot of ingredients but once they are all put together it actually cooks up very quickly so it's an easy-to-make entrée that's served best with a fresh green garden salad.
Servings 4

Ingredients
  

  • 1 12 oz. packet of Impossible™ ground plant based ground meat or any ground veg. meat
  • 1 carton of Pepperidge Farm or Dufour puff pastry defrosted
  • 2 large heirloom organic tomatoes
  • 1/2 c.olive oil and or ghee
  • 1/2 red pepper chopped
  • 2 small carrots chopped
  • 1/2 onion chopped
  • 8 large slices of sharp white cheddar or Havarti or sharp vegan cheese
  • 1 egg
  • 1/2 t. Herbs de Provence
  • 1/2 t. onion powder
  • Salt and Pepper to taste
  • 1 vegetable bouillon cube
  • 2 small fingerling potatoes finely diced
  • 1 cup 0.24 l of heavy cream or unsweetened creamy oat milk

Instructions
 

  • Preheat oven to 350 degrees F
  • Cut one medium size onion, the same amount of carrot, and one small potato (I used two yellow fingerling potatoes) into small pieces and sauté them in a pot. (I use Ghee.)
  • Cut two garlic cloves into small pieces and add them when the rest is almost ready
  • Transfer this mixture to a glass bowl.
  • In the same pot, fry one pound of Impossible meat
  • Add some olive oil ( 3 – 4 tablespoons)
  • Season with salt, Herbs de Provence, pepper, onion powder, and a portion of a vegetable bouillon cube (maybe a third of a cube)
  • Add one finely cut up red bell pepper
  • Once done, transfer this to the same bowl
  • Add one egg and 2 – 3 tablespoons of heavy whipping cream and mix all of it
  • Roll out the pastry: one carton (each contains one sheet). Don't roll them too thin or the pastries will break when you transfer them to a baking tray
  • Cut each sheet so that you obtain 4 rectangles (so 8 total)
  • Distribute the filling
  • Add tomato slices (two slices of a large heirloom tomato is what I used)
  • Sprinkle salt and pepper on the tomato slices – not too much salt, though, because we are going to add cheese.
  • Add cheese (I used sliced Havarti)
  • Fold the pastry over and close it into pouches
  • Whatever way you have to make a seam
  • I start at one end of the seam and pull the edges with my fingers, folding them over themselves until I reach the end of the seam
  • Put on a baking tray lined with parchment paper and bake in a pre-heated oven at 350 F for 45 min to an hour (I have also made them at 400 degrees for 30 minutes if you don’t have much time)
  • Paint the pastries with egg, oil, or ghee 5 minutes before serving
  • Cool for 5 mins. Before serving, best with a fresh green garden salad.
  • Serves 4.

I’m privileged to be participating in the Naropa Summer Writing Program at the Jack Kerouac School of Disembodied Poetics… Admittedly 30 years now from the first time! Here is Andrew Schelling and famous beat poet Anne Waldman, our chair, reading, and well as amazing faculty like Ronaldo V. Wilson, and Thurston Moore from Sonic Youth.

I know many of my friends attended Naropa, here are some snapshots of the campus from this week 2023, so many memories! Please follow my art and poetry blog here: https://dawnboiani.wordpress.com/2019/12/26/ode-to-kerouac-burroughs-and-ginsberg/

I’m going to soon publish a body of work never before published, so please do follow and stay in touch~ If you are local, the public is invited to our evening readings at the Naropa main campus at 7 for free, and I just might read a poem on Friday Night! You can also come to our final faculty reading on Saturday night 7-1-23, at 7pm~

I just uploaded my favorite “love” poem on my personal blog, that I might read, to Soundcloud for practice- please read and listen here:

https://dawnboiani.wordpress.com/2019/10/29/she-script-the-pen-that-writes-itself/

 

 

Try writing Kerouac Style https://buddhistsomatics.com/posts/poetry-is-the-voice-of-the-heart-happy-birthday-jack-kerouac/

Kerouac’s 30 Rules for Writing

  1. Scribbled secret notebooks, and wild typewritten pages, for yr own joy
  2. Submissive to everything, open, listening
  3. Try never get drunk outside yr own house
  4. Be in love with yr life
  5. Something that you feel will find its own form
  6. Be crazy dumbsaint of the mind
  7. Blow as deep as you want to blow
  8. Write what you want bottomless from bottom of the mind
  9. The unspeakable visions of the individual
  10. No time for poetry but exactly what is
  11. Visionary tics shivering in the chest
  12. In tranced fixation dreaming upon object before you
  13. Remove literary, grammatical and syntactical inhibition
  14. Like Proust be an old tea-head of time
  15. Telling the true story of the world in interior monologue
  16. The jewel center of interest is the eye within the eye
  17. Write in recollection and amazement for yourself
  18. Work from pithy middle eye out, swimming in language sea
  19. Accept loss forever
  20. Believe in the holy contour of life
  21. Struggle to sketch the flow that already exists intact in mind
  22. Don’t think of words when you stop but to see picture better
  23. Keep track of every day the date emblazoned in yr morning
  24. No fear or shame in the dignity of yr experience, language & knowledge
  25. Write for the world to read and see yr exact pictures of it
  26. Bookmovie is the movie in words, the visual American form
  27. In praise of Character in the Bleak inhuman Loneliness
  28. Composing wild, undisciplined, pure, coming in from under, crazier the better
  29. You’re a Genius all the time
  30. Writer-Director of Earthly movies Sponsored & Angeled in Heaven

I just discovered Chia seeds and add them to my overnite oats or smoothie every morning. They are tiny black or white seeds that come from the plant Salvia hispanica, which is native to Mexico and Guatemala. They have been consumed for thousands of years and were a staple food in ancient Mayan and Aztec diets. They have gained popularity in recent years due to their numerous health benefits as they are highly nutritious and are considered a superfood. They are kind of amazing, if you add them to liquid they expand and form a gel-like outer substance called mucilage, similar to flax seed that’s great for your digestion. You can get them at any health food store, choose well-sourced organic chia. Here are some of the key health benefits of chia seeds:

 

1. Nutritional Profile: Chia seeds are packed with essential nutrients. They are an excellent source of fiber, providing both soluble and insoluble types. They also contain a good amount of protein, healthy fats (including omega-3 fatty acids), vitamins (such as vitamin B, vitamin E), and minerals (including calcium, magnesium, and phosphorus).

2. High in Antioxidants: Chia seeds are rich in antioxidants, which help protect the body against oxidative stress caused by free radicals. Antioxidants play a vital role in reducing inflammation and lowering the risk of chronic diseases.

3. Promote Digestive Health: The high fiber content in chia seeds can contribute to healthy digestion. They absorb water and form a gel-like substance in the digestive tract, aiding in regular bowel movements and preventing constipation. Additionally, the fiber content helps promote the growth of beneficial bacteria in the gut.

4. Weight Management: Chia seeds can be a valuable addition to a weight loss or weight management plan. Due to their high fiber and protein content, they can help promote feelings of fullness and reduce appetite, potentially leading to lower calorie intake.

5. Heart Health: The omega-3 fatty acids found in chia seeds, particularly alpha-linolenic acid (ALA), are beneficial for heart health. They help reduce inflammation, lower blood pressure, improve cholesterol levels, and decrease the risk of heart disease.

6. Blood Sugar Regulation: Chia seeds have a low glycemic index, meaning they are digested and absorbed slowly, resulting in a gradual release of glucose into the bloodstream. This characteristic can help stabilize blood sugar levels, making chia seeds beneficial for individuals with diabetes or those aiming to manage their blood sugar.

7. Bone Health: Chia seeds contain essential minerals like calcium, magnesium, and phosphorus, which are vital for maintaining healthy bones. These minerals contribute to bone strength and density, reducing the risk of osteoporosis and fractures.

pexels-delphine-hourlay-691162

Oatless Porridge With Chia Recipe

Ingredients:

½ cup dairy free milk
2 tablespoons shredded coconut
2 tablespoons chia seeds (you can also pre-soak these overnight)
½ banana, mashed
¼ cup berries of choice
Dash cinnamon

Directions:

Take out a bowl and mash ½ banana, top with dairy free milk, shredded coconut, chia seeds or flax meal, top with berries and a dash of cinnamon and serve.

Warm version: Add mashed banana and dairy free milk to a pot on the stove and warm for 2-3 minutes. Place in bowl and top with remaining ingredients.

You can also do a three day Healing Diet Cleanse, with chia.

It’s important to note that while chia seeds offer several potential health benefits, they should be consumed as part of a balanced diet and not relied upon as a sole solution for any specific health condition. As with any dietary changes, it’s recommended to consult with a healthcare professional or a registered dietitian for personalized advice. Statements not evaluated by the FDA.

————————-

National Institutes of Health: Office of Dietary Supplements. Dietary supplement label database: chia seed.

https://www.britannica.com/plant/chia

https://www.verywellhealth.com/chia-seeds-uses-nutrition-and-more-7378110

image: https://www.pexels.com/photo/delicious-desserts-in-glass-jars-beside-a-pair-of-spoons-and-textile-5803166/

Burrata with Zucchini and Pesto

This makes a stunning side dish or light spring/summer main course. The zucchini are soft inside and crispy on the outside as we can turn our oven into an air-fryer. All topped with a creamy burrata finished with flavorful pesto. The crushed red pepper and salt rouse the taste buds, as this dish is a fresh work of art!

Ingredients:

 

▪ 3 large zucchini green and or yellow, cut into 1/2-inch rounds
▪ 2-3 sliced organic Roma tomatoes
▪ 3 tablespoon extra-virgin olive oil
▪ 1⁄2 teaspoon crushed red pepper
▪ 1⁄4 teaspoon salt
▪ 8 oz. burrata ball or balls, fresh mozzarella works too
▪ 5 tablespoons pesto
▪ .5 oz. fresh basil leaves

 

Directions:

1. Preheat to 425°F.
2. Oil a baking sheet lightly and place zucchini on there next to each other, single layer.
3. Brush with remaining olive oil and sprinkle red peppers and salt on top.
4. Roast for about 10 minutes,
5. Then turn on broiler and broil for 5 minutes, being careful not to burn.
6. Remove from oven and arrange with burrata, tomatoes and fresh basil.
7. Drizzle pesto and serve!

burrata-with-pesto-zucchini

burrata-with-pesto-zucchini

Burrata with Zucchini and Pesto

This makes a stunning side dish or light spring/summer main course. The zucchini are soft inside and crispy on the outside as we can turn our oven into an air-fryer. All topped with a creamy burrata finished with flavorful pesto. The crushed red pepper and salt rouse the taste buds, as this dish is a fresh work of art!

Ingredients
  

  • 3 large zucchini green and or yellow cut into 1/2-inch rounds
  • 2-3 sliced organic Roma tomatoes
  • 3 tablespoon extra-virgin olive oil
  • 1⁄2 teaspoon crushed red pepper
  • 1⁄4 teaspoon salt
  • 8 oz. burrata ball or balls fresh mozzarella works too
  • 5 tablespoons pesto
  • .5 oz. fresh basil leaves

Instructions
 

  • Preheat to 425°F.
  • Oil a baking sheet lightly and place zucchini on there next to each other, single layer.
  • Brush with remaining olive oil and sprinkle red peppers and salt on top.
  • Roast for about 10 minutes,
  • Then turn on broiler and broil for 5 minutes, being careful not to burn.
  • Remove from oven and arrange with burrata, tomatoes and fresh basil.
  • Drizzle pesto and serve!

Serves 4.

Total time: 30 minutes.

This was adapted from the recipe on Eating Well, By Ali Ramee | Published on August 15, 2022

The Effortless Sleep Method

Can’t sleep? So many of us struggle with poor sleep, broken sleep or insomnia from a variety of inner, environmental and behavioral reasons. Aging is one of the most common, particularly in women over 40 and it can wreak havoc on one’s overall functioning. Believe me, I know, I’ve battled with this on and off for 10 years now. I use Tibetan, Chinese and Functional medicine, and it all helps. Cognitive Behavioral Therapy for Insomnia is also known as CBTI and is more powerful than sleeping pills with no dangerous side effects.

However, if your insomnia is very severe and all herbs and supplements fail, there are times where the doctors may prescribe a short term of sleeping pills (2 weeks or so). This is a temporary stop gap to reset your system, as long as they are carefully monitored and slowly tapered and used only in the most urgent situations where strict CBTI fails. Please see our other articles about sleeping pill tapering. Here is a distilled compilation of recommendations from the foremost book, The Effortless Sleep Method (the author, Sasha Stephens is referred to as the Insomnia exorcist!), CBTI for Veterans and the book Prescriptions for Natural Healing.

Here is a summary of what Sasha says, please download her e-book or listen on Audible for details.

  1. SPEND LESS TIME IN BED
  2. NO NAPS
  3. GET UP WHEN YOU CAN’T SLEEP
  4. GET UP AT THE SAME TIME EVERYDAY
  5. DO NOTHING IN BED BUT SLEEP OR SEX
  6. KICK THE PILLS
  7. STOP CLOCK WATCHING
  8. REPLACE NEGATIVE SLEEP TALK WITH POSITIVE STATEMENTS
  9. LET GO OF THE SEARCH FOR AN EXTERNAL MIRACLE CURE
  10. FIND A RELAXATION METHOD THAT WORKS FOR YOU
  11. FIND A SAFETY NET, RELAX INTO YOUR SAFETY THOUGHT
  12. PUT YOUR LIFE FIRST
  13. READ THE EFFORTLESS SLEEP METHOD OFTEN

Achieve a solid base of sleeptime habits:

A. You are really tired and sleepy when you go to bed at night and
B. Make the bed be associated with being asleep and not with lying awake fretting.

A powerful mantra that removes pressure is:

“I DON’T CARE IF I SLEEP OR NOT”

Sasha Stephens

Veterans Tools

DOWNLOAD THE CBTI MANUAL FOR VETERANS

Install the App for free:

cbti300x300

Sleep Hygiene

The most common cause of insomnia is a change in your daily routine. For example, traveling, change in work hours, disruption of other behaviors (eating, exercise, leisure, etc.), and relationship conflicts can all cause sleep problems. Paying attention to good sleep hygiene is the most important thing you can do to maintain good sleep.

Do’s:

1. Go to bed at the same time each day.

2. Get up from bed at the same time each day. Try to maintain something close to this on weekends.

3. Get regular exercise each day, preferably in the morning. There is good evidence that regular exercise improves restful sleep. This includes stretching and aerobic exercise.

4. Get regular exposure to outdoor or bright lights, especially in the late afternoon.

5. Keep the temperature in your bedroom comfortable.

6. Keep the bedroom quiet when sleeping.

7. Keep the bedroom dark enough to facilitate sleep.

8. Use your bed only for sleep (and sexual activity). This will help you associate your bed with sleep, not with other activities like paying bills, talking on the phone, watching TV.

9. Establish a regular, relaxing bedtime routine. Relaxing rituals prior to bedtime may include a warm bath or shower, aromatherapy, reading, or listening to soothing music.

10. Use a relaxation exercise just before going to sleep or use relaxing imagery. Even if you don’t fall asleep, this will allow your body to rest and feel relaxed.

11. Keep your feet and hands warm. Wear warm socks to bed.

12. Designate another time to write down problems & possible solutions in the late afternoon or early evening, not close to bedtime. Do not dwell on any one thought or idea—merely jot something down and put the idea aside.

Do Not’s:

1. Exercise just before going to bed. Try to keep it no closer than 3-4 hrs before bed.

2. Engage in stimulating activity just before bed, such as playing a competitive game, watching an exciting program on television or movie, or having an important discussion with a loved one.

3. Have caffeine in the evening (coffee, many teas, chocolate, sodas, etc.)

4. Read or watch television in bed.

5. Use alcohol to help you sleep. It actually interrupts your sleep cycle.

6. Go to bed too hungry or too full.

7. Take another person’s sleeping pills.

8. Take over-the-counter sleeping pills, without your doctor’s knowledge. Tolerance can develop rapidly with these medications.

9. Take daytime naps. If you do, keep them to no more than 20 minutes, 8 hrs before bedtime.

10. Command yourself to go to sleep. This only makes your mind and body more alert.

11. Watch the clock or count minutes; this usually causes more anxiety, which keeps you up.

12. Lie in bed awake for more than 20-30 minutes. Instead, get up, go to a different room (or different part of the bedroom), participate in a quiet activity (e.g. non-excitable reading), and then return to bed when you feel sleepy. Do not turn on lights or sit in front of a bright TV or computer, this will stimulate your brain to wake up. Stay in a dark, quiet place. Do this as many times during the night as needed.

13. Succumb to maladaptive thoughts like: “Oh no, look how late it is, I’ll never get to sleep” or “I must have eight hours of sleep each night, if I get less than eight hours of sleep I will get sick.” Challenge your concerns and avoid catastrophizing. Remember that we cannot fully control our sleep process. Trying too hard to control it will make you more tense and more awake.

14. Change your daytime routine the next day if you didn’t sleep well. Even if you have a bad night sleep and are tired it is important that you try to keep your daytime activities the same as you had planned. That is, don’t avoid activities or stay in bed late because you feel tired. This can reinforce the insomnia.

15. Increase caffeine intakes the next day, this can keep you up again the following night.

Functional Medicine Supplement and Herbs

PhyllisABalch

Functional Medicine Suggestions from Prescriptions for Natural Healing by Phyllis A. Balch CNC (Author)

I have also used this formula called SLEEP REMEDY and it has helped so much, it was made for Navy Seals!

 

*PLEASE CONSULT WITH YOUR DOCTOR AND INTEGRATIVE MEDICINE PRACTITIONER  BEFORE TAKING ANY SUPPLEMENTS OR STARTING ON ANY HEALTHCARE REGIME. DO NOT START OR ABRUPTLY STOP TAKING SLEEPING PILLS UNLESS YOU ARE UNDER A PROVIDER’S CARE.

 

Adapted from:

http://www.cci.health.wa.gov.au/docs/Info-sleep%20hygiene.pdf

http://web.mac.com/jendanielle/Site/MentalHealth_file /Sleep%20Hygeine%20WORKSHEET.pdf

http://www.tufts.edu/med/phfm/pdf/fm-handouts/SleepHygiene.pdf

https://offices.vassar.edu/counseling-service/wp-content/uploads/sites/31/2020/03/sleep-hygeine-handout-for-clients.pdf

DIY- Collagen Chebe Butter for Hair Repair

Have you ever seen the glamorous shiny hair in film stars and wondered what they use? This natural formula really works and is better than any commercial product that I have found ready-made. Chebe powder has been used by women in Chad who are world renowned for having very long and healthy hair. Chebe is often used in its ground form, but dries on the hair and when you wash it out, you have powder like coffee grounds everywhere, and can be irritating to the scalp. This recipe creates an easy olive oil infusion, no mess!

Perfect as an intensive conditioner for dry and damaged hair, a leave in daily treatment or a mask infusion, this hair butter recipe is organic, simple to make and nourishing to many hair types. Chebe is powerful, and should not be used on the scalp, as it can cause mild itching in any form, but I use it as both a mask and daily leave in, and my hair has never been as shiny and emollient as it is now! You can also try this hair butter and omit the chebe infusion.

Ingredients:

  • 3/4 cup Braggs organic extra virgin olive oil
  • 2.5 tsp. Chebe powder
  • 5 T. Coconut oil
  • 3 T. Cocoa butter
  • 1 tsp. Lanolin
  • 2 T. of Shea butter
  • 2 T. of Castor oil
  • 1 T. Collagen powder
  • 20 drops of Lavender essential oil
  • 1 tsp. of Beeswax
  • 1 tsp. Borax (a safe and natural ingredient used to get a whipped texture)
  • 1/3 cup Water

chebe-infusion

Instructions:

Pour the olive oil into a nonstick saucepan and stir the chebe powder into it. Cook, covered on low heat to 2 hours.

Strain the chebe powder from oil with a tea strainer or cheesecloth, and dispose of powder.

Pour infused olive oil back into the pan, and melt all other ingredients one by one except the water and borax on very low heat, stirring constantly.

When melted take off of heat and cool for 30 minutes to a warm temp 100ºF/40ºC, mixture will still be liquid. You can place the mixture in the freezer to cool it rapidly.

In another pan dissolve the borax into the water and heat on low.

After a few minutes have passed, remove the from the freezer and use a spatula to scrape down the sides of the bowl. You can now begin to whip up the mixture with an electric beater, on slow, stopping once or twice to scrape sides of the mixer.

Then, slowly add the water and borax mixture while whipping and the cream will now start to become light, whipped and fluffy like a butter.

Whip it until the butter holds its shape, but can still pour.

Once you’ve gotten to a whipped texture, you can transfer your mixture to jars for storage. Store in refrigerator until ready to use.

Experiment!

Feel free to add more nutritive items like 1 tsp.- 1 T.: argan oil, vitamin E, avocado oil, aloe oil, and 1 T. of apple cider vinegar to prevent molding and your choice of essential oils like tea tree and rosemary. You can also simplify the recipe by using fewer oils/butters and experimenting with those that work best for your hair, but do not omit the beeswax or borax, otherwise the mixture will not become a whipped butter consistency. You can make this without the Chebe powder infusion if you don’t have it or it irritates your scalp.

How to Use:

For a conditioning mask, thickly coat hair starting from 1″ below scalp to the ends, with more butter on the ends to repair. You can braid your hair, cover or put it up in a bun. Be careful with pillows and textiles and clothes because this powerful mixture can stain. Leave in for two hours and the wash and condition with sulfate-free shampoo.

For a daily leave in, use a small amount, a dime size to start and rub into hair well, avoiding scalp, with special attention to the ends. They will repair instantly and become shiny! Don’t use too much or hair will look oily. The leave in can be left in until the next wash.

 

Needed: blender, tea strainer or cheesecloth, rubber spatula, 4 oz. containers with lid

Makes:  approx. 3, 4oz jars of hair butter

hair-butter

chebe-hair-butter

DIY- Collagen Chebe Butter for Hair Repair

Have you ever seen the glamorous shiny hair in filmstars and wondered what they use? This natural formula really works and is better than any commercial product that I have found ready-made. Chebe powder has been used by women in Chad who are  world renowned for having very long and healthy hair. Chebe is often used in its ground form, but dries on the hair and when you wash it out, you have powder like coffee grounds everywhere, and can be irritating to the scalp. This recipe creates an easy olive oil infusion, no mess! Perfect as an intensive conditioner for dry and damaged hair, a leave in daily treatment or a mask infusion, this hair butter recipe is organic, simple to make and nourishing to many hair types. Chebe is powerful, and should not be used on the scalp, as it can cause mild itching in any form, but I use it as both a mask and daily leave in, and my hair has never been as shiny and emollient as it is now! You can also try this hair butter and omit the chebe infusion.

Equipment

  • blender, tea strainer or cheesecloth, rubber spatula, 4 oz. containers with lid

Ingredients
  

  • 3/4 cup Braggs organic extra virgin olive oil
  • 2.5 tsp. Chebe powder
  • 5 T. Coconut oil
  • 3 T. Cocoa butter
  • 1 tsp. Lanolin
  • 2 T. of Shea butter
  • 2 T. of Castor oil
  • 1 T. Collagen powder
  • 20 drops of Lavender essential oil
  • 1 tsp. of Beeswax
  • 1 tsp. Borax a safe and natural ingredient used to get a whipped texture
  • 1/3 cup Water

Instructions
 

  • Pour the olive oil into a nonstick saucepan and stir the chebe powder into it. Cook, covered on low heat to 2 hours.
  • Strain the chebe powder from oil with a tea strainer or cheesecloth, and dispose of powder.
  • Pour infused olive oil back into the pan, and melt all other ingredients one by one except the water and borax on very low heat, stirring constantly.
  • When melted take off of heat and cool for 30 minutes to a warm temp 100ºF/40ºC, mixture will still be liquid. You can place the mixture in the freezer to cool it rapidly.
  • In another pan dissolve the borax into the water and heat on low.
  • After a few minutes have passed, remove the from the freezer and use a spatula to scrape down the sides of the bowl. You can now begin to whip up the mixture with an electric beater, on slow, stopping once or twice to scrape sides of the mixer.
  • Then, slowly add the water and borax mixture while whipping and the cream will now start to become light, whipped and fluffy like a butter.
  • Whip it until the butter holds its shape, but can still pour.
  • Once you've gotten to a whipped texture, you can transfer your mixture to jars for storage. Store in refrigerator until ready to use.

Notes

Experiment!
Feel free to add more nutritive items like 1 tsp.- 1 T.: argan oil, vitamin E, avocado oil, aloe oil, and 1 T. of apple cider vinegar to prevent molding and your choice of essential oils like tea tree and rosemary. You can also simplify the recipe by using fewer oils/butters and experimenting with those that work best for your hair, but do not omit the beeswax or borax, otherwise the mixture will not become a whipped butter consistency. You can make this without the Chebe powder infusion if you don't have it or it irritates your scalp.
How to Use:
For a conditioning mask, thickly coat hair starting from 1" below scalp to the ends, with more butter on the ends to repair. You can braid your hair, cover or put it up in a bun. Be careful with pillows and textiles and clothes because this powerful mixture can stain. Leave in for two hours and the wash and condition with sulfate-free shampoo.
For a daily leave in, use a small amount, a dime size to start and rub into hair well, avoiding scalp, with special attention to the ends. They will repair instantly and become shiny! Don't use too much or hair will look oily. The leave in can be left in until the next wash.

Reprinted from Mandala Magazine September, 2004 DOWNLOAD THE FREE EBOOK

By Paula Chichester (Lhundup Nyingje), Retreat Advisor to Land of Joy

Ordained for the last 13 years, Ven. Paula has devoted 24 years of her life to Buddhist retreat practice. She bridges the culture gap to enable Western people to attain Buddhadharma realizations by leading inspiring retreats and by giving advice on the support for and environmental needs of retreatants.

“The most important aspect of retreat is to keep your mind happy…. Practice should be free of looking for results. Even if you spend your entire life doing practice and have not a single experience, no results at all, it should still be a cause for great joy to have spent your life like that.”—Geshe Lhundup Sopa

Lung (pronounced “loong”), or ‘meditator’s disease’, happens to almost every meditator, even very experienced ones. It is similar to an athlete who strains a muscle and then has to rest for a while to let that muscle heal. We meditators strain our nervous systems. Some of us already have a strained nervous system when we begin our meditation practice. Unless the lung is very severe, it is nothing to be afraid of or to worry about, it is just a trade hazard that we can learn to work with and endure. Lung is our teacher because it is the feedback we receive when we are not meditating properly – or not living a balanced lifestyle. Lung is the Tibetan word for ‘wind’. Generally, meditator’s lung is congested chi in and around the heart chakra. We all learn about lung when we attend our first Tibetan Vajrayana Buddhist group meditation retreat. Either we get it, or we hear about it from our friends who get it. Lung literally means wind but we can translate it, in this context, as ‘mental stress’. The mind rides on the subtle winds of the body, and when the winds don’t run smoothly, we feel stress. When many people begin a retreat on a Tibetan mantra yoga sadhana practice that involves visualizing complicated forms, reciting liturgy, and reciting mantras, they discover after a week or a month that their minds actually become more agitated than they were before. They may experience pain in the chest or back pain, or headaches; they may cry easily and anger easily, too. They may feel anxious or have panic attacks or insomnia. Some people become depressed. Some people have delusional paranoia, hear things, or feel strange sensations in their bodies. Others have indigestion, constipation, or diarrhea. Lung is often experienced as a negative attitude toward the practice (your mind and body want to stop!) so you experience doubts about the practice, doubts about your lama. Lung can become bad if it is not remedied, and if the person continues the pattern that causes it, it’s possible to become severely mentally disturbed. But that is rare. Mostly it’s just a negative mind or a nagging obsession that won’t go away. Sometimes lung manifests as an aversion to meditating. You just don’t want to go back and sit on that cushion!

Anyone under mental pressure and strain experiences lung. Meeting deadlines at work, family stress, and studying for final exams all bring on lung. Everyone has their own style of lung. It’s a good idea to learn your personal pattern so you can know when to relax in your retreat. When you start to feel negative or can’t sleep one night or have indigestion, or when you uncontrollably growl at someone, then you know it is time to rest, to back off on the intensity of your practice. Often there are signs that indicate lung is on the verge of breaking out into major symptoms. For me, I almost always have an anxiety dream based on the theme of the night before a final exam at university when I haven’t studied at all and I’m frantic. That tells me, “Time to slow down, Nyingje-la!” When I used to start designing fashions in my meditation sessions while reciting a mantra, I knew it was time for a good long break and a walk.

When some of our wonderful Tibetan masters first encountered people from modern industrialized societies, they were impressed with our level of education and intellectual acuity; thus, they assumed we would make great practitioners. They taught us advanced practices and soon watched us all get lung! I think this is rather like a figure skating master who discovers a group of ballet dancers and thinks they will make great figure skaters. The ballet dancers get out on the ice and try to dance, and they all end up with sprained ankles and broken bones. We have these greatly activated minds, but they developed without any awareness of the winds that carry those mind-bytes. Watching our breath and learning about our wind-mind before we add all the visualizations and mantras is like skating round and round the rink for hours and hours before we even try to turn around on the skates.

Geshe Rabten thought all Westerners have tsog lung (chronic heart lung). After he spent a year leading a calm abiding retreat for Westerners, Gen Lamrimpa said to us that he thought Westerners could never learn to meditate: Our minds are too fast because we grew up with machines and computers. In other words, we all have chronic low- grade anxiety or tsog lung. It is so ubiquitous that we think it is normal. There is an epidemic of depression and anxiety in modern industrialized society that is growing rapidly, even among children. Our lifestyle gives us lung. This same source of most of our health problems is also what causes us to have a difficult time in meditation retreats.

When we talk about lung, we must distinguish between acute lung and chronic lung. Acute lung comes from concentrating too hard on the mandala or reciting mantras too fast or working too hard in service at our jobs, or frustration in relationships. Chronic lung can be treated with herbs, diet, acupuncture, Tibetan medicine, and talking therapies. I would try these options before going to pharmaceuticals because in the long run these chemicals may only compound the imbalance.

However, when symptoms are especially intense, people may need immediate relief. You might decide to take pharmaceuticals for a short time, with the help of other supportive therapies, and then slowly wean yourself off them. I would recommend checking with a lama before taking any pharmaceutical chemicals. It is my impression that they are dispensed far too easily, and they may harm the body and mind in the long term. If a person is willing to change their eating habits, take herbs, or go to an acupuncturist and/or a skillful psychotherapist, pharmaceutical medicines are most likely not necessary.

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How and why we get lung

Kirti Tsenshab Rinpoche told us that faith and intention are the main activities of tantric practice. This is so important. We get lung because we don’t know this essential ingredient. We get too serious and try very hard to see all the details of the mandala and to say thousands of mantras a day, thinking that more is better. This gives us lung.

In Tibetan medicine, lung (wind) imbalance is related to attachment; bile imbalance is related to anger/aversion; and phlegm imbalance is related to ignorance. At first, it may not be so clear how unskillful meditation that leads to lung is related to attachment. If you think of attachment as the mind that wants, that grasps, that clings, and then check up while you meditate, you can see how a subtle version of grasping and clinging can abide with you as you focus on your meditation object. It comes in the form of wanting more clarity than you have, or wanting to finish up, or not wanting to finish. If you are in a neutral state of mind, and then think of something you want to do, you can feel a slight tightening in your chest, a little excitement or anticipation. Most of us think this is happiness, but it is actually a state of grasping. This can also cause lung.

Those who do – and don’t – get lung

People who meditate for stress reduction purposes only and aren’t interested in attaining enlightenment probably don’t get lung. We get lung because we are trying to do something, trying to attain something, instead of relaxing and letting it happen naturally. Lung comes from forcing our mind beyond its capacity to stay relaxed while meditating. The key to good meditation is a relaxed mind. Forcing the mind to concentrate only harms our development in the long run. This is very hard to learn because we don’t often know when we are forcing our mind – until we get lung! We are habituated to having a slightly grasping or excited mind when we do things, because this is often where we find the energy to do what we want to do; but this does not work for us when we want to meditate. We get lung from forcing our minds to stay on the meditation object when it is tired. We get lung from saying the mantra too fast and for too long. We get lung from forcing a visualization to be clear. We get lung from trying to keep the thoughts at bay instead of understanding that it’s okay for thoughts to come and go. What we are looking for is to stabilize on the mind that lies below the thoughts. No accepting and no rejecting…the ocean, not the waves…remember?

Lung usually comes on very slowly, after days of forcing concentration or reciting mantras too fast without being aware of it. By the time you realize you have lung, it’s very hard to dissipate without stopping the meditation altogether and resting the mind for a few days by engaging in fun and play. Lung just seems to be part of learning how to do Vajrayana practice. The more you practice, the sooner you identify the habits that lead to lung, and therefore it becomes less and less of a problem. The more you meditate, the more you are able to perceive the texture of your mind, so you can see or hear the mistakes just as an artist or a musician would. It just takes time on the cushion. Like any other form of discipline, it only becomes easy with a lot of effort…right effort: gentle, loving, relaxed, no expectation, no pushing effort. We need to remember that one of the four powers of joyous effort in Shantideva’s teachings on the six perfections is the power of rest. In modern industrialized society, resting is a sign of weakness. Rest is just as important as activity in manifesting any sort of production.

Tibetan masters describe the process of meditation as being similar to training a wild horse. If you tether it to a short rope and try to beat it into submission, you will have a very difficult time taming that horse. But if you give it a large corral to run in and approach the wild animal with kindness and love, you can ride that horse in a short while. Remember the movie, The Horse Whisperer? We have to learn to relax our minds and treat ourselves very gently. Ribur Rinpoche tells us over and over again, “…r..e..l..a..x….”

This is the key to meditation without lung.

Lung prevention and management:

1. Don’t push yourself, your body or your mind – more is not better and might is not right. Whatever you do, do it for others!

2. Prostrate before sessions or do chi gong in the breaks. Twice a day is good, if you can.

3. Begin your session with a quiet time, calming your mind, tuning in to your energy. Breathe into your lower chakras and let the anxiety come out. Melt the tension with the experience of refuge. Soothe your inner child; listen kindly to its complaints.

4. End your session with five minutes of spacious meditation, just relaxing into the three circles of emptiness of dedication or relax at the dissolution time. Even though you want to get up, just sit and breathe into the mental tension until your mind is relaxed. Aim to end the session before you are tired. Also, you can visualize your hollow body filled with five-colored lights radiating out all the lung and blessing all the sentient beings and the environment.

5. Spend a little time every day, if possible, relaxing your gaze by looking up at the sky or staring out at a long distance view as you gently recognize emptiness. This really lets the lung out.

6. Eat enough protein and cut back on (not cut out!) all sweets. Eat a well-balanced diet, suited to your body type and health needs, i.e., study nutrition. Exercise six days a week.

7. Learn to relax in all your actions. Meditation is play, not work. Relax: Lie down or sit in a comfortable chair or do chi gong for a few minutes after your session ends. (This is advice from His Holiness the Dalai Lama.)

8. Don’t force your visualization. Be satisfied with what comes.

9. Contentment is the key to a good retreat; cultivate contentment and a happy mind. Meditate on the innermost jewels of the Kadam geshes every day. The key to contentment is breathing with bodhichitta all the time. Detach yourself from grasping experiences by a deep understanding of karma, and let go of all notions of blame and shame. “Follow your bliss,” as Joseph Campbell used to say. 10. ‘Set your re-set button’ once a week, if not once a day. That is, recreate until you feel grounded, open, joyful, clear, and motivated.

RETREAT

Advice about Lung from Lama Zopa Rinpoche

[Excerpted from a forthcoming book of selections of advice from Lama Zopa Rinpoche to students on everything from specific practice questions to personal problems. The book will be on sale later this year.]

1. To a monk who has lung “I understand about lung. When one is bored and tired of doing prayers, one sees the prayer book, and lung comes. Things that are difficult and things that we don’t like bring lung. I don’t think that the things you really enjoy give lung. Do you agree? Sometimes when you do something with so much energy, sudden- ly the energy changes and then you change; you give up. For example, a monk worked so hard for a very long time with computers, even through the night; then it suddenly changed, and he couldn’t do it any- more. The energy just changed! “So in this case, something that you get bored with and don’t like will give you lung. Psychologically, the antidote is to accept. Whenever you encounter problems, rather than being unhappy about it, accept it as a result of past karma, then it no longer becomes a problem, or it is much less of a problem. Think especially of the benefits. Kadam Geshe Karab Gomchung said that even a small suffering in the present finishes heavy past negative karmas that cause us to be reborn in the lower realms, where we would experience suffering for many eons.

As a result, there will be a happy life in the future. “Therefore, one should meditate, rejoicing in the suffering. Of course, as you know from thought trans- formation, you can use your problem to practice bodhichitta, use it for the ‘taking and giving’ practice — taking all sentient beings’ suffering in the form of pollution through the nostrils, taking it into the heart, destroying all the ego and the self-cherishing thought completely, so there’s nothing left. Do this a few times. At other times, think, ‘I’m experiencing this for all sentient beings.’ “By doing this, you collect skies of merit, and the body becomes like a wish-granting jewel. With this body, when you experience suffering for others with each taking and giving, many eons of negative karma are purified. Each time you come closer to enlightenment. This is the best practice, as you know! “You can also use the lung incense made by Tibetans, apply Tiger Balm, or take the Tibetan medicine, Agar 35, for life-wind sicknesses.”

2. To a student who could not sleep “People in the West think that if you do not sleep there is something wrong with you, but is it is only a problem if it is causing harm to your health; other- wise, it can be very useful. Maybe people who need to do clear light meditation need to sleep. Actually, my job is putting people to sleep, I think you know this! “If you can’t fall asleep, one method is to do prayers and read the Lam-rim. Maybe if you try to meditate for a long time you will fall asleep. For problems associated with lung eating meat can be very beneficial, and eating garlic and onion can help as well. Also, one can drink broth made from bones, boiling the bones in hot water [see Mandala June-July 2004 Tibetan Medicine]. “The best thing to do is the practice of the 35 Confession Buddhas, with prostrations and recitation. This may help because it purifies your negative karma and creates the cause for you to achieve enlighten- ment. You can do it in the morning or evening.”

3. To a student who said she had had lung for the past three years “Visualize the guru on your crown. Nectar flows from the guru’s heart down into your body, speech, and mind, purifying illness, spirit harm, negative karma, and obscurations (especially lung energy). As you visualize this, recite the guru’s mantra. “This method can also be used for any heavy sickness. While the guru is still on the crown of your head, make strong request with total reliance on the ‘ guru for this negative karma to be purified completely. Do this before absorbing the guru into the heart. “When you have strong lung, while standing, visualize an iron nine-pronged vajra at your heart, inside your body. This iron vajra is red-hot, blazing oneness with fire. Concentrate pointedly on that vajra. That is the main practice.”

4. To a nun was suffering from lung in the heart, and depression. Rinpoche recommended acupuncture and the following Tibetan precious pills: Moon Crystal, three a week for seven weeks, and Rinchen Jumar, four times a week for seven weeks. This completely got rid of her lung.

5. To a monk who had been experiencing serious lung while attending the Basic Study program. He had begun having difficulty studying, to the point that he requested permission to become a part- time student. He requested Lama Zopa’s advice as to whether he should remain at the study center and do part-time study, or work part-time. He also asked Rinpoche to recommend a practice for him to do. Rinpoche responded as follows: “Early in the morning, and at night, breathe in very strongly and then breathe out very strongly. Think that the lung has gone out as negative karma. Do this many times. Also do the physical exercises from the Six Yogas of Naropa. Chi Gong is also helpful.

“There is a special lung practice called Mani Hardun that Lama Tsongkhapa came across when he was studying and was manifesting the aspect of lung. He received the practice from an old Sakya monk. It may be difficult to find, but you could ask a geshe. A student received the transmission for this practice from Kirti Tsenshab Rinpoche and was cured just by receiving the transmission.”

LungTheMeditatorsDisease PDF

 

 

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image:

https://www.pexels.com/photo/stacked-of-stones-outdoors-289586/

Keto Almond Shortbread Cookies

Here is my simple and healthy recipe for easy Keto Almond Shortbread Cookies. A perfect, house warming way to welcome the New Year, or anytime!

Ingredients:

2 sticks organic butter or vegan butter or 1 cup of unrefined coconut oil, softened to room temperature
1 cup monkfruit or 1-1 stevia baking sugar
½ cup cane sugar
½ tsp salt (¼ if using salted butter)
2 lg. organic whole eggs
1 T. almond extract
2 cups super-fine almond flour
½ cup gluten free (rice) flour
Sliced almonds and pearl sugar (optional) for decoration

Keto-almond-shortbread

Directions:

  1. Cream your butter or oils, sugars and salt together with am electric or hand whisk, 60 strokes.
  2. Add eggs, beat for another minute, then add almond extract, beat again.
  3. Slowly add flours, mix until dough has been mixed thoroughly.
  4. Chill in refrigerator  for 1 hour.
  5. Preheat oven to 325°F.
  6. Take 2T of dough, roll into balls and place cookies separated by 2 inches onto 2 parchment paper-lined cookie sheets. Gently flatten each cookie with your hand. Press sliced almonds and pearl sugar on top of each cookie for decoration, if desired. Bake 18-22 minutes, until tan around edges, do not over cook. Serve when cooled.

Makes about 20 cookies

Keto-almond-shortbread-cookies

Keto-almond-shortbread-cookie

Keto Almond Shortbread Cookies

Here is my simple and healthy recipe for easy Keto Almond Shortbread Cookies. A perfect warm way to welcome the New Year!

Ingredients
  

  • 2 sticks organic butter or vegan butter or 1 cup of unrefined coconut oil softened to room temperature
  • 1 cup monkfruit or 1-1 stevia baking sugar
  • ½ cup cane sugar
  • ½ tsp salt
  • 2 lg. organic whole eggs
  • 1 T. almond extract
  • 2 cups super-fine almond flour
  • ½ cup gluten free rice flour
  • Sliced almonds and pearl sugar optional for decoration

Instructions
 

  • Cream your butter or oils, sugars and salt together with am electric or hand whisk, 60 strokes.
  • Add eggs, beat for another minute, then add almond extract, beat again.
  • Slowly add flours, mix until dough has been mixed thoroughly.
  • Chill in refrigerator  for 1 hour.
  • Preheat oven to 325°F.
  • Take 2T of dough, roll into balls and place cookies separated by 2 inches onto 2 parchment paper-lined cookie sheets. Gently flatten each cookie with your hand. Press sliced almonds and pearl sugar on top of each cookie for decoration, if desired. Bake 18-22 minutes, until tan around edges, do not over cook. Serve when cooled.

Foaming Toilet Cleaning Bomb Recipe

While I was making bath bombs for Holiday gifts, I thought I’d try these cool foaming toilet cleaning bombs too! You can omit the borax if you dont have it on hand, but it works very well for stubborn stains. If they fizz too much add more cornstarch to absorb moisture.

Ingredients:

  1. 1 cup baking soda
  2. 1/4 cup citric acid
  3. 1/4 cup borax
  4. 2 T. cornstarch as needed
  5. 1 T. liquid Dr. Bronners SalSuds or dish soap
  6. 1/2 t. or 30 drops essential oils like any citrus or mint
  7. silicone mold, sprayed with nonstick spray or olive oil

Instructions:

  • Mix the baking soda, borax, cornstarch and citric acid in a bowl and stir.
  • Add essential oils and liquid soap in another bowl.
  • Slowly drip into wet ingredients powder mixture and stir. It will fizz slightly, if it is too wet add a bit more cornstarch.
  • Press the bomb ingredients into your silicon mold.
  • Allow the mixture to dry overnight or until completely hardened.
  • Remove toilet cleaning bombs from the mold and store in a mason jar or any airtight container.
  • Pop one into toilet allow it to foam up, then clean to sparkling! Your bathroom will smell great!

diy-toilet-cleaning-bombs

foaming-toilet-bombs

Foaming Toilet Cleaning Bomb Recipe

While I was making bath bombs for Holiday gifts, I thought I'd try these cool foaming toilet cleaning bombs too! You can omit the borax if you dont have it on hand, but it works very well for stubborn stains. If they fizz too much add more cornstarch to absorb moisture.

Equipment

  • silicone mold, sprayed with nonstick spray or olive oil

Ingredients
  

  • 1 cup baking soda
  • 1/4 cup citric acid
  • 1/4 cup borax
  • 2 T. cornstarch as needed
  • 1 T. liquid Dr. Bronners SalSuds or dish soap
  • 1/2 t. or 30 drops essential oils like any citrus or mint.
  • silicone mold sprayed with nonstick spray or olive oil

Instructions
 

  • Mix the baking soda, borax, cornstarch and citric acid in a bowl and stir.
  • Add essential oils and liquid soap in another bowl.
  • Slowly drip into wet ingredients powder mixture and stir. It will fizz slightly, if it is too wet add a bit more cornstarch.
  • Press the bomb ingredients into your silicon mold.
  • Allow the mixture to dry overnight or until completely hardened.
  • Remove toilet cleaning bombs from the mold and store in a mason jar or any airtight container.

Notes

Pop one into toilet allow it to foam up, then clean to sparkling! Your bathroom will smell great!

Healing Bath Bomb Recipe with Patchouli and CBD

This Holiday Season, I’m making homemade gifts and these calming and healing D.I.Y. bath bombs are so cute and just perfect for gift giving. I found some nice Rocky Mountain full spectrum CBD salve with arnica and Dead Sea salts. These make these a perfect bath treat right before bed, to soak, relive aches and pains and restore your tired muscles and heart. I used one last night, it fizzes in warm water, then surrounds you with flower petals and later, I and slept very soundly. You can omit the CBD if you don’t have any and replace it with coconut oil, and use any essential oil your choose, or none! You can also add colored mica powder, but I like mine a-naturele.

You will need a bath bomb mold and or silicone baking molds, here I used both.

Ingredients:

• 1 cup baking soda
• 1/2 cup citric acid
• 2 T. cornstarch
• dried rose petals
• 1/2 cup epsom salts
• 1/2 cup dead sea salts (optional)
• 1/4 cup full spectrum CBD salve with arnica, melted or coconut oil
• 1/2 teaspoon/20 drops patchouli or other essential oil
• 2 T. water

Instructions:

1. Add all dry ingredients to a medium-size bowl, stir well with a wooden spoon.
2. Melt the cbd salve in a double boiler.
3. Mix the wet ingredients together, the salve, essential oil, and water by whisking.
4. Slowly drip the wet ingredients into the dry, stir until the ingredients hold together when squeezed in your hands. Do not over-saturate.
5. They will fizz a bit due to the citric acid but the cornstarch will absorb moisture. Add 1 T more if too wet.
6. Prepare your bath bomb molds by lightly greasing them with spray olive or coconut oil.
7. Press the mixture into the bath bomb molds and then place the two halves together.
8. Wipe the excess mixture off the sides and set aside.
9. Allow the molds to sit for overnight hours or until completely dry and then turn over, and carefully pop out of the molds.

patchouli-cbd-bath-bomb organic-bath-bombscbd-bath-bombs-diy heart-bath-bombs

heart-bath-bombs

Healing Bath Bomb Recipe- Patchouli + CBD

This Holiday Season, I'm making homemade gifts and these calming and healing D.I.Y. bath bombs are so cute and just perfect for gift giving. I found some nice Rocky Mountain full spectrum CBD salve with arnica and Dead Sea salts, that make these a perfect bath treat right before bed, to soak, relive aches and pains and restore your tired muscles and heart. I used one last night, it fizzes in warm water, then surrounds you with flower petals and I and slept very soundly. You can omit the CBD if you don't have any and replace it with coconut oil, and use any essential oil your choose, or none! You can also add colored mica powder, but I like mine a-naturele.

Equipment

  • You will need a bath bomb mold and or silicone baking molds, here I used both.

Ingredients
  

  • 1 cup baking soda
  • 1/2 cup citric acid
  • 2 T. cornstarch
  • dried rose petals
  • 1/2 cup epsom salts
  • 1/2 cup dead sea salts optional
  • 1/4 cup full spectrum CBD salve with arnica melted or coconut oil
  • 1/2 teaspoon/20 drops patchouli or other essential oil
  • 2 T. water

Instructions
 

  • Add all dry ingredients to a medium-size bowl, stir well with a wooden spoon.
  • Melt the cbd salve in a double boiler.
  • Mix the wet ingredients together, the salve, essential oil, and water by whisking.
  • Slowly drip the wet ingredients into the dry, stir until the ingredients hold together when squeezed in your hands. Do not over-saturate.
  • They will fizz a bit due to the citric acid but the cornstarch will absorb moisture. Add 1 T more if too wet.
  • Prepare your bath bomb molds by lightly greasing them with spray olive or coconut oil.
  • Press the mixture into the bath bomb molds and then place the two halves together.
  • Wipe the excess mixture off the sides and set aside.
  • Allow the molds to sit for overnight hours or until completely dry and then turn over, and carefully pop out of the molds.

pexels-danik-prihodko-10767023

To the men that know;
The men that choose to grow.
To the men who have had the courage to lay broken on the floor;
Who have embraced each change with strength and determination;
Stood solid,
Naked
In their truth.
To the men who have
Given
Everything
And been left with
Nothing,
Yet still,
In every day,
In every way,
They show love.
To the men who have seen the darkness
Of a woman lost in pain,
And sheltered her
In their warm embrace;
Tended to each wound;
Soaked their own essence in each of her tears.
To the men who failed,
But rose again;
Lost their heart,
And found their love.
To the men who strive
Each day
To love themselves more;
Embrace their own darkness that led them to pain;
Energise their light until it radiates to the sky.
To the men who show
Appreciation
For the journey that the woman takes
To reach his love,
For he is her mirror;
He is her love,
And she loves you.
In every moment you give
That appreciation,
She feels it,
She appreciates you.
To the men who are love,
We love you,
Thank You
For loving us.

Heather Lea

___________________________________

Reposted on this snowy winter morning, thanks to my dear goddess sister from Crestone Colorado, Zuki. We live together in a remote spiritual community that also is becoming acutely aware of false spiritual paths, teachers and people. This poem is pure dharma and exemplifies our genuine human goodness, our raw and real potential. Genuine dharma does not produce people who are loveless, arrogant, escapist and use the dharma for nefarious purposes and thus waste their lives, but rather, can be self aware, accountable, able to see shadow and participate in adult relational resolution.
To these men, I bow deeply.
We love you, man.
image: https://www.pexels.com/photo/happy-couple-hugging-10767023/

Greetings, everyone!
This is Dawn Boiani again from BuddhistSomatics.com, and I run a women’s wellness blog. I write about, basically my personal experience, being a survivor of generational narcissistic abuse, and then, organizational narcissism from recreating those same root family patterns by joining an unhealthy spiritual community that was led by someone that recreated that same family dynamic that I grew up with. So, I wanted to write to you tonight about, narcissistic abuse because, it just happened to me and I’m in a great amount of pain. Anyone that has been in relationship with a narcissist, be it a lover, a parent, a close friend, an employer, it’s one of the most violent types of abuse because oftentimes it’s psychological. And in other types of abuse where someone is physically assaulting you or sexually assaulting you, it’s very easy to demarcate yourself from the perpetrator because there’s an actual crime that occurred that’s empirically proven. But with narcissistic abuse, the kind of back and forth and the sort of, wooing you in for narcissist’s supply to build up their self-esteem and self-worth at your expense; it acts like love. And oftentimes, if you’ve been in relationship with the disordered person like that, they’ve hurt you so much that you’re the walking wounded as far as that relationship is concerned.

Trauma Bonds

The moment that the person would come back to you and resolve this, it actually feels like such a relief. So even though you’ve been abused by this person, be it a family member, coworker, lover, spouse, you’re hurting and it feels unresolved. It feels like a raw, open wound. So when the person comes back against all that is intuitive and sane, you will re-engender the relationship and hope that this time it will be different. Now they’ve “finally seen the light” and they’re going to be accountable, culpable for how much they hurt you, and they’re going to apologize and everything’s going to be okay. So we keep on going back to these people with the hope that they have conscience and that they care and they want to resolve what was hurtful. So that’s, that’s actually called a trauma bond. These bonds are really intense, biochemically, it’s like Pavlov’s dog, you’re always hoping that you’re going to have the pellet.

It’s like you wait around for that and it can become obsessive. It can become debilitating to try to seek resolve from someone who’s emotionally abusive. This type of abuse is truly insidious because, the narcissist or disordered person will intentionally use things against you to devalue you. It can be very subtle sometimes. It’s not always yelling and screaming, [throwing] pots and pans, or sexual or physical assault. It’s just this insidious indication that: I’ve hurt you, you’re there to build me up if you don’t agree to the unspoken rule that you never confront a narcissist.  You have to walk on eggshells and cajole this person, then if you break the unspoken rule, it causes narcissistic injury, narcissistic rage, and the person can become really intensely cruel and then…discard you.

Devalue, Discard and Hovering

And then it cycles around once they’ve settled down and they miss you or something, then they come back around just to do it again. So it is this really unhealthy, toxic thing, but it is so heart wrenching. I love the quote: “no scar on my heart ever came from anyone I hated.” I was just the recipient of narcissistic abuse for about an hour and a half yesterday from a parent. And we’re in that situation where we have a family member and there’s an inheritance and there’s end of life. My family are, just a piranha pool of dysfunction and hatred and vitriol, swearing and chain smoking and just is really like atrocious toxic energy. Just no love, no kindness, backstabbing, triangulating, dyads, triads, looking for fault, abusing, yelling, swearing, physical assaults. Then after you’ve assaulted someone, then the person who is a perpetrator goes and says, “well, you deserved it.”

No Contact?

So that’s my family and my own husband had said, “we really can’t have contact with them.” But me, being a good Pollyanna codependent, always hoping for the best, and being eternally wounded, always will, with tears and with an open heart and with hope, kind of like a Saint Bernard, always hopes maybe that person will someday come around and appreciate me and say, “I really loved you.” You were a great daughter, you were a great sister, you were a great niece. We value you. But my family has chosen me as the scapegoat for the whole family shadow. As far as I can see back, these patterns, these unhealthy, toxic, dysfunctional patterns have gone on for generations. I have a 16 year old daughter, and I’ve tried really hard to not impart that toxicity to her.

I think she’s gotten some of it because I was raised with this, but I feel like she’s fundamentally healthy. And, the buck sort of stops here. I didn’t do to her the same things that my family did to me.  I hope that she’s the new generation of healing, that’s the best that we can do. We can’t go back and we can’t fix our our families of origin, but we can stop the bleeding and stop recreating those patterns into the next generation. I think I’ve done that, but right now, I just am writing to you because, I’m shaking and my heart rate is resting pulse of about a hundred. I have a trip planned for tomorrow with my family. We were going to go to the beach and hang out and be underneath palm trees. Now, I have to cancel that because of narcissistic abuse from my mom.

emotional rape

No Resolve

The abuse went on for about an hour and a half. I was yelled at, I was counter projected, I was blamed, I was insulted. I was told things like, well, the family wants to see your daughter, but not you. It was really vicious. You can’t imagine that a mother would ever speak to a child that way, but that’s my experience. It’s gone on for 53 years and  I’ve become a Buddhist and got into meditation and learned forgiveness, meditated, cried, rebirthing, done heavy breathing, yogic stuff, upwards of $50,000 of therapy, and one phone call reopens the scar, and it is just like I’m four years old again, being abused by a parent.

When you’re abused, I was abused actually in the crib, neglected, part of the damage is pre-concept. So when the perpetrator comes back, you, it reopens something that’s often you don’t even have access to it in your conceptual mind. So all of my amazing techniques, I have 84,000 techniques to remedy pain, ALL go out the window. They’re useless in the in the midst of abuse. It’s like, energetically, narcissists, when they are abusive, it’s actually a form of emotional rape. They hover you in by believing that they’re safe and that they care about you. They forge intimacy, you open to them and then they try to have power over you. So they say things that make you feel like you have no merit, no value. It’s devaluing, insulting, condescending, using things to trump you intellectually or financially, like my mother used to say, “no matter how hard you try, you’ll never be as beautiful as I am.”

Whatever they can say to put you down, that makes them feel that they can build themselves up and actually gives them sort of a ego bump. Narcissists are predicated on a deep chasm of self-loathing, self hatred, inner disdain. They overcompensate by being self consumed, using others to build them up in a predatory way and discarding them when that supply is no longer feeding their vacuum, bottomless pit. So once you get hip, they get bored of you, you confront, or you’re not giving them the kudos that they live on, they are predatory, they are parasitic, you get cut out, you get usually a narcissistic rage, sworn at, attacked, and then ultimately blocked. So, I was raised by someone like this, a primary relationship. So that’s kind of the m.o. of my life.

Blocking?

I encounter these people, from time to time. It’s like an unspoken magnet. It’s like, I think they call it trauma reenactment. There’s this unspoken thing where it just kind of lights up. I meet this person who’s an abuser, who is a narcissist, who is the vacuum, who is a predator. And it’s like heroin, it’s  compulsive. I can’t not, get into a codependent rapport with them where they hurt me, they break me, and then I try really hard to fix it. (fawn) So this dynamic has happened time and time again in my life. And relationships, romantic relationships, even friendships, it’s a constant theme, with my family. A lot of them are still alive, and disordered people. So, I’ve worked very hard to try to do things like block people, tell them to please stay out of my life.

But it is so hard. it’s much easier said than done to block a family member. I guess you have very deep karma. Other people, like my husband, will look at the outside and say, your mother’s sworn at you, she’s assaulted you, and you were 36 years old! She has used the F word in front of your child, she’s run around the house screaming. Why would you engender a relationship with someone who is disordered or deranged or tempered tantrums and emotionally violent? Walk away!” [He suggests]. Then I start crying, like as if I’m a baby, I’m 53 and I could start crying. And I say, “because I love her.” And no one no person, even disordered people are all evil. It becomes almost like an existential question. Like, if I give up, then it’s almost a testament to human beings being evil.

The Birth of Codependency

I don’t want to let go of the hope that the person would have a conscience, heal what they did that was wrong, and we could have a relationship. So, the hope never goes away in my heart, to be able to heal these narcissistic relationships. It really is the heart, the architecture of codependency. Like, codependency is defined as, you have an unhealthy attachment with someone and they hurt you, and yet you continue to engender the relationship. They call it fight, flight, [freeze] or fawn. Those are three different types of trauma responses. You get into high conflict or you try to block or run away, or you try to care take on it on and fix everything. You take on the karma and you try to process it. So those are three different unhealthy trauma responses.

So I admit being a child abuse survivor, and a physical assault survivor, from a number of sources in this life, I do the fight flight or fawn, and the people who normally, normal people who weren’t raised this way, you meet a toxic person and you recognize that and you’re like, “wow, this person is dangerous!” This person has a criminal past. This person has sworn at me, this person has devalued me, you walk away, you’re like, wow, I’m outta here… but not me! I actually like, kind of fall in love or I chase after I pursue, a parent or family member or friendship of someone that has been hurtful because I’m so like, chomping at the bit, longing to resolve it, believing that I’m lovable, believing that they must have a conscience, believing that we can all “work it out.”

And that’s how codependents work. So why it’s unhealthy and why it’s addictive is it’s almost like, with codependency as if, people become your drug of choice and alcoholic, would, even if their health is in danger, continue to drink until their liver fails, or heroin until someone OD’s. You do the same thing energetically with a person. You engender a toxic relationship of something that could actually destroy you, people can die from narcissistic abuse. They can get heart attacks, clinical depression, fibromyalgia, nervous breakdowns, because the psychological violence with narcissistic abuse is so incredibly cruel. It usually results in a, discard, devaluation and discard like a complete cut. The [narcissistic] person will usually say, “you mean absolutely nothing to me, stay the hell out of my life, I want no contact with you.”

This is, I’ve heard this, half a dozen times from these people. And, that type of icy cold violence, it looks good. Like, oh, we’re setting boundaries, but it’s actually a form of the most violent way of being cruel that you can possibly imagine. Because it’s saying that, you mean so little to me mean nothing,  you’re insignificant. It doesn’t matter what I did, doesn’t matter what you feel, you mean nothing. Stay the hell out of my life. You don’t even merit one sentence. So, I mean, if someone’s raping you or if someone’s hurting you and physically assaulting you, at least you matter, at least, at least you sort of are engaged and the person cares enough to be hurting you. I mean, you’re still actually in relationship with the person. Your being means something, even if you’re being physically abused and then being physically abused either through assault or through rape, it is so clear to, to parse out that because it is a physical, concrete thing.

Narcissistic abuse or abuse from people who are cluster B disordered is so insidious and sometimes it is so long term and it can be abuse by silence, and it can actually kill somebody. It is very, very powerful, being blocked, being discarded. Because if someone is codependent and you’re into relational resolution, conversation, working stuff out, your mind actually short circuits, you don’t know where to go. No therapist can fix it. No other lover, no friend. It’s like, that’s why I’m talking to you guys. It’s like, your mind’s sort of short circuit because you can’t go back to the perpetrator to resolve the pain.

No Closure After Discard

It stays as this sort of like, like a record skipping. It stays in your mind-stream. It never, it’s like you can’t even get on with your life. It just skips, skip, skip, skip, skip, skip skips, because it’s like you’re constantly being told by the silence that you are the wrong one. That you’re not even worth resolving it with. And this cold, icy, silent violence is, murderous. I don’t mean to be dramatic, but many people have lost their lives from being the recipients of narcissistic abuse because it is so in intensely conscienceless and cruel. I believe that some of these people that I’ve been in contact with, including my family members now around this inheritance, they actually intend to hurt. Like, what can I do to hurt her? What can I do? It sounds paranoid, and if people haven’t, I really commend anyone that has never been the recipient of a disordered person’s abuse because it is really heartbreaking.

How to Heal?

So how to heal? I mean, it is funny because I’ve studied this. I have a degree in psychology. I have a certificate as a wellness coach. I have as, as I said, $50,000 of therapy, processing, meditating…seeing rainbows. I mean, I’ve done like everything that I can possibly think of to heal. One conversation with my perpetrator, boom, I’m just devastated again for an untold amount of time. Then I heal and I feel strong again. Pick myself up by the bootstraps, dusted off, gotten back into yoga, meditation, wellness. I’m radiant and doing well, and then I feel strong. Then another, narcissist in different form, it’s usually the same one in my life. My, my mom, will come back into the life and things will be okay for a short period of time.

I open again, I hope things are well. And then BAM, another instance of abuse. There’s no, it’s been 53 years and it’s only gotten worse. And I’ve only been patient forgiven, cried, confronted, blocked. I’ve tried every single trick in the bag: silence, walking away, pre-grieving their death. I mean, you name it, I have tried, I have forged this mountain like, I’m like an expert narcissistic abuse,a nd I’m just sitting here now on November 17th. It’s 6:33 PM in Boulder, Colorado, shaking and crying intermittently for about eight hours.

It causes a complete cognitive dissonance because if I give up the hope that I can resolve things with a narcissist, then the world feels like you’re letting evil win. You’re letting the darkest part of our human-ness have power. You’re letting them define a loveless conscienceless world where we hate each other and we use each other. We spit each other out. So to give up the hope to me, it is so weird. It just feels like, you’ve given into the basest part of our being. So, like, the hope for me is the most equivalent to like something existential, I hope that humans care for each other. I hope they regret when they hurt each other. I hope that someone who I cared about would see me as being lovable and good.

Trauma Reenactment

These are very, very deep things. That’s the fuel with which we stay engaged with toxic people because being the recipient of emotional, psychological abuse, which is, like I said, it’s a form of emotional rape. It’s like you become the walking wounded and you can have a mirror resonance with these people and recreate that pattern again and again and be hurt again and again. Sometimes it can take years or a lifetime or never to heal. So, I don’t actually know the resolve. I feel that like to just walk away and say, block everything and have no contact.

Yeah, I mean, that’s the m.o. that’s what they say. There’s only, that’s the only method of being able to try to have a semblance of a healthy life after emotional rape. But, at the same time, allowing the perpetrator to get away with it, charm everyone by their charisma, triangulate people against their victim. It just feels also wrong too. It’s like if I can quote former President Bush, he said, “silence is not peace, non-action is not peace.” So at the same note, I almost have this kind of veracity or compulsion to hold abusers accountable in every way, in my personal relationships and in politics and in my religion. I found out a few years ago that, there’s a lot of alcoholism and pedophilia and, I can’t really sign up for a religion and keep perpetuating it while there’s a bunch of perpetrators there.

I can’t put pictures up of pedophiles, all day and worship them and work for them. That doesn’t sound like really great job. There’s got to be, better things to do than put up pictures of “Catholic priest” pedophiles all day long. And people who’ve, run monasteries where kids are physically and sexually assaulted, it doesn’t seem like a really holy thing, I’ve got to find a better religion. So I, I call these things out and yeah, definitely the quintessential wounded healer, social justice warrior, that was predicated on being an abuse survivor in this life. If you know what it feels like to hurt, to hurt a child, you have a whole lot of energy in your heart to fight.

And, hopefully I’ve done some good work in this life. I’ve worked in politics and I worked to prevent child abuse, worked with seniors. I’ve worked as a mental health counselor. I don’t think there’s any way to completely ever become so Teflon coated, so iron-clad that you’re not hurt by someone who you love. Even if they are a narcissist, even if they’re disordered, it still hurts. You know? And I guess somehow even being a child abuse survivor, an adult abuse survivor, there’s the kind of grace that I have to know that I can still cry.

I can still love, I can still somehow have hope, in the goodness of humans and our ethics and our ability to change, grow, be accountable for our mistakes, for our abuse, care for each other, become tender. And, heal as species in families, friendships, communities. To give up that hope to me is like life and death, I could never give it up. So will I ever become super boundary filled, hopeless, give up on all my narcissistic friends, community, family members? No, I’m not physically capable of giving up. I will always hold a candle of hope and love and appreciation because it actually has to do with my own self worth. Like, I believe that I’m lovable. Ipso facto, I believe that these people who’ve hurt me will once, the, once the fog clears, will see that I’m a good person and that I’m worthy of love.

Boundaries of Emotional Intimacy

So hope prevails. I learned something recently when I was in counseling, and the counselor talked to me about, compassion and boundaries. Codependents don’t like the word boundaries, we’re like boundaries, schmoundaries? We love everyone! Everyone’s welcome in my heart. Everyone’s welcome in my life. I love everyone. I’ll fight to the mat for love, for relationships, for friendships, you know? She said that every single person, said the counselor, is worthy of your compassion. Even people who’ve done heinous crimes, Pol Pot and Hitler, sociopaths you can understand. It is not a justification. I mean, crimes are crimes, crimes against humanity are egregious, it’s the worst of what we are, but you can have compassion. I can understand the how’s and whys of how someone would rise to power and do these horrible things.

“Everyone is worthy of your compassion, your understanding of karma, your understanding of how they came to be, but not everyone is worthy of your emotional intimacy.”

So everyone is worthy of your compassion, your understanding of karma, your understanding of how they came to be, but not everyone is worthy of your emotional intimacy. Your heart should not be just a doormat of openness that you wear on your sleeve that anyone can break. She said that, who you allow into your inner circle of intimacy are people that have earned a place to be there through trust and through proving to you that they’re emotionally safe, that they have your best interest in mind. That they will not, idealize, devalue, discard, the narcissistic pattern of psychological abuse or, minimizing you not caring about your feelings, using you for their own gains, egoic or financial or sexual or whatever. But that, and then maybe there aren’t very many people in that inner circle, maybe there is only a cat, who knows?

The people who you allow yourself to be emotionally vulnerable to, you allow people into your inner circle to become very close to you so they can hurt you, they’ve earned that place into your inner circle by proving that they love you. And that, there’s equity, equity in the relationship, equalness and reciprocity. That’s where codependents could learn boundaries. Like, hey, we do the opposite. We, we actually sometimes, it’s like the bad boy syndrome or the wounded healer, or like, we do the opposite. We kind of keep the people that would love us on the outside of the circle. We, because of the trauma reenactment and the resonance, we actually bring all the unwell people in.

We’re like, “hey, come on in, let’s duke this out, let’s fix this karmic stuff together.” So you actually bring the sick people in and keep the other ones in the outside. So it’s like a healing would be to reverse that. You have enough self love, self value, and you’ve healed to enough of a degree where you say, to the best of of what you can, family member, lover, child, pet, anyone, “you can only be in my circle of intimacy if you’ve earned a place there by proving that you are a person of, integrity, person of love, and that you, have my best interest in mind. You don’t want to hurt me. You don’t want to destroy me, you don’t want to use me. You’re not trying to game me for some nefarious purpose, but that it’s pure and it’s wholesome.”

Your Tears Are Your Love

So those are the people, even if it’s a very small circle, it’s better to have a really small circle of intimacy of people that have your best interest in mind more than a cesspool of toxic people that only destroy your life force. So that’s not compassion. Being destroyed is not compassion, you know? So anyway, I offer this to you tonight about boundaries. But, crying all day for eight hours, having been abused by a parent at 53, kind of big Baby Huey that hasn’t grown up yet. But, someone once said to me that, “your tears are your love.”

Love from a Distance

So, sometimes if people are disordered, they don’t value you or they’re unkind or cruel, it doesn’t mean that the love inside of us has to stop, but sometimes all we can do in this life is let them go and love from a distance. That’s actually compassion. And more like Ken Wilber’s Integral Way of seeing the world. Like we all have a right to manifest, all of our strengths and weaknesses and all of our neurosis and, there’s a place for it all and God’s grace kind of thing. So if a person chooses to be abusive and not value me, to use people to chew up and spit them out, to take vengeance, those are choices that they make, it doesn’t mean that I don’t love the person or see beauty in them, or have fond memories of them, but, they can’t really be in my space of intimacy if they’re going to be cruel.

And I’m glad I can still cry. I’m glad I can still love, I’m glad I can still get hurt. I think that would be worse, to have a heart that has gotten so jaded that it doesn’t feel anymore. So I’d rather go through bouts of paper thin snowflake grief, than to become hardened and to not care. I’d rather care too much than care not at all, or not enough. So, as Popeye said, “I yam what I yam.” And, tonight I’m grieving. Today I’m grieving. I have a narcissist that has no accountability and no conscience. There’s nothing I can do about it. So these are my words. This is my heart. I believe in the goodness of us all and all of my love and well wishes to everyone, always.

____________________________

Colophon:

Sadly, many of us will experience encountering a predatory narcissist at least once in our lives, especially if we were raised by a narcissistic parent. If we are vulnerable, the damage to our heart, mind and soul can be irreparable if it goes untreated. It can be so very hard to heal or leave an abuser, and sometimes the abuse is emotional, not physical. Idealize, devaluing and then discarding a human being is one of the most poisonous, cruelest, core-soul levels of abuse that we can experience. And sadly, the perpetrators blame their victims and walk away with impunity when they find no more use for you in terms of “narcissistic supply.”

This people have a grandiose sense of self-importance, are often times “high conflict personalities” and are hallmarked by never having a sense of conscience, empathy, regret, any ability to change or sincere apology. When they get discovered or have extracted your power completely, you are replaced with no closure and they go right on to find multitudes of other prey in the wake of your decimated heart. They even feel a sense of semi-sadistic power and control, knowing that they hurt you and were successfully able to exploit your perceived weakness… love.

According to Wikipedia rape is:

Rape is a type of sexual assault usually involving sexual intercourse or other forms of sexual penetration perpetrated against a person without that person’s consent. The act may be carried out by physical force, coercion, abuse of authority or against a person who is incapable of giving valid consent, such as one who is unconscious, incapacitated, has an intellectual disability or below the legal age of consent. The term rape is sometimes used interchangeably with the term sexual assault.[4]

Emotional rape is when a person is emotionally assaulted, where another person has intentionally emotionally perpetrated against a person without that person’s consent.  No one, unless they have experienced it or have studied this type of abuse can realize how severely traumatized the victim will be.  It is an attack on their personality/spirit/soul rather than their body, it is a very misunderstood trauma and often inflicted by primary care givers.  Emotional rape is far more complex than verbal abuse and it is only when we can discuss it openly and candidly that we can help people recover from this sort of despicable abuse.

The narcissist will employ a number of tactics to do this which include:

  • Lying
  • Gaslighting
  • Smear campaign
  • Constant criticism to your face
  • Scapegoating
  • Silent treatment
  • Narcissistic rage
  • Direct verbal abuse
  • Physical abuse
  • Stealing money or possessions
  • A multitude of non-verbal signals to let you know that they view you with utter disdain and contempt.

 

 

 

 

 

Photo by Kat Jayne from Pexels

Vegan Thai Peanut Tofu

This may well be one of my very favorite vegan dishes! I used to buy this often from Whole Foods and it’s much cheaper to make at home. The tofu has a crispy oven broiled finish and the peanut sauce is creamy, sweet and spicy. Healthy, filled with veggies. No animal products to boot!

Ingredients:

• 24 oz./ 2 blocks extra firm tofu, cubed
• 3 T. olive oil
• 1 tsp. grated or powered ginger
• 1 T. grated or powered garlic
• 5 T. organic peanut butter
• 1 tsp. hot sauce
• 2 T. soy sauce
• 2 tsp. sesame oil
• 2 T. maple syrup
• 1/4 teaspoon garlic powder
• 1/4 teaspoon black pepper
• Salt to taste
• 1 cup water
• 1 diced green pepper
• 1 diced red pepper
• 6 shredded baby carrots
• chopped green onion
• roasted peanuts

Directions:

• Prepare Rice.

• Preheat the oven to 425°F. Coat tofu in olive oil, and sprinkle with salt. Bake tofu for 12-15 minutes, turn and broil until crispy. Remove from oven and set aside.

• Chop veggies and lightly steam all but green onions in a skillet.

• Roast peanuts in a frying pan with 1 tsp. olive oil.

• Put all the remaining ingredients in a bowl, whisk until creamy and then add to skillet pan cook until warm.

• Finally, add the tofu cubes, mix well.

• Garnish with green onion and peanuts. Serve hot with basmati rice.

 

thai-tofu-1 thai-tofu-peanuts thai-tofu-sauce thai-tofu

thai-tofu

Vegan Thai Peanut Tofu

The tofu has a crispy oven broiled finish and the peanut sauce is creamy, sweet and spicy. Healthy, filled with veggies. No animal products to boot!

Ingredients
  

  • 24 oz./ 2 blocks extra firm tofu cubed
  • 3 T. olive oil
  • 1 tsp. grated or powered ginger
  • 1 T. grated or powered garlic
  • 5 T. organic peanut butter
  • 1 tsp. hot sauce
  • 2 T. soy sauce
  • 2 tsp. sesame oil
  • 2 T. maple syrup
  • 1/4 tsp. garlic powder
  • 1/4 tsp. black pepper
  • Salt to taste
  • 1 cup water
  • 1 diced green pepper
  • 1 diced red pepper
  • 6 shredded baby carrots
  • chopped green onion
  • roasted peanuts

Instructions
 

  • Prepare Rice.
  • Preheat the oven to 425 degrees F. Coat tofu in olive oil, and sprinkle with salt. Bake tofu for 12-15 minutes, turn and broil until crispy. Remove from oven and set aside.
  • Chop veggies and lightly steam all but green onions in a skillet.
  • Roast peanuts in a frying pan with 1 tsp. olive oil.
  • Put all the remaining ingredients in a bowl, whisk until creamy and then add to skillet pan cook until warm.
  • Finally, add the tofu cubes, mix well.
  • Garnish with green onion and peanuts. Serve hot with basmati rice.

Healthy Chocolate Avocado Pudding

I was at an exclusive health food restaurant yesterday and they had some chocolate avocado pudding in a small jar for $12. With food costs increasing and especially prepared food I just couldn’t justify spending $12 and little jar of pudding, so I made a mental note of the ingredients and ran home and made it that day! It turned out this pudding is absolutely amazing and healthy!

Ingredients:

  • 3 organic avocados ripe
  • 4 tablespoons, 1/2 a stick of butter, vegan butter or coconut oil
  • 3 heaping tablespoons of coconut sugar, honey or maple syrup
  • 3 heaping tablespoons of dark cocoa powder
  • 3 ounces or 80 grams of unsweetened coconut flakes or coconut meat
  • Pinch of salt if using coconut oil
  • 1 ripe organic banana
  • 1 cup of almond milk or chocolate almond milk
  • (optional) 1 scoop of protein powder, vanilla or chocolate

 

chocolate-avacado-pudding-1-1

Instructions:

Cut open the avocados and remove the pit, use a spoon to scoop out, place in blender or food processor.

Add all other ingredients. Blend, starting on low and then moving to high speed until it is smooth.

Use a rubber spatula to scoop out pudding from blender, and place in a bowl.

Refrigerate the pudding and serve cold.

Serves 4-6.

chocolate-pudding-organic

chocolate-avacado-pudding-2

Healthy Chocolate Avocado Pudding

It turned out this pudding is absolutely amazing and healthy!

Ingredients
  

  • 3 organic avocados ripe
  • 4 tablespoons 1/2 a stick of butter, vegan butter or coconut oil
  • 3 heaping tablespoons of coconut sugar honey or maple syrup
  • 3 heaping tablespoons of dark cocoa powder
  • 3 ounces or 80g of unsweetened coconut flakes or coconut meat
  • Pinch of salt if using coconut oil
  • 1 ripe organic banana
  • 1 cup of almond milk or chocolate almond milk
  • (optional) 1 scoop or protein powder, vanilla or chocolate

Instructions
 

  • Cut open the avocados and remove the pit, use a spoon scoop out and place in blender or food processor.
  • Add all other ingredients. Blend, starting on low and then moving to high speed until it is smooth.
  • Use a rubber spatula to scoop out pudding from blender, and place in a bowl.
  • Refrigerate the pudding and serve cold.

We are thankful that our county allows us to raise chickens (hens, not roosters!), even in a suburban neighborhood. We can have up to 6, and repurposed an old Tough Shed into a heated coop. We are grateful to have about 4 organic, free range, healthy, farm fresh eggs per day! Closeups of our beloved hen “family.”

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Here are the differences between commercial washed and unwashed eggs~

Before the hen lays an egg her body creates a protective layer called a bloom. The bloom protects the eggs from any bacterial entry by coating eggs with a protective sealant, as eggs have about 6000 pores.

Large commercial egg producers spray eggs with chemical disinfectants before packaging to reduce the risk of contamination with bacteria such as salmonella. When the eggs are washed the flora is removed leaving the egg pores open for potential new bacteria.

Without a protective layer it is recommended to refrigerate the washed eggs to about 45 degrees to prevent the growth of bacteria. If the eggs remain unwashed you can leave them on the kitchen counter. Unwashed eggs can keep at room temperature for about two weeks. If you are not going to eat eggs for a while we recommend storing them in the refrigerator. Lower temperatures increase shelf life and eggs will last up to three months in the fridge.

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There she is. . . the “too much” woman. The one who loves too hard, feels too deeply, asks too often, desires too much.

There she is taking up too much space, with her laughter, her curves, her honesty, her sexuality. Her presence is as tall as a tree, as wide as a mountain. Her energy occupies every crevice of the room. Too much space she takes.

There she is causing a ruckus with her persistent wanting, too much wanting.

She desires a lot, wants everything—too much happiness, too much alone time, too much pleasure. She’ll go through brimstone, murky river, and hellfire to get it. She’ll risk all to quell the longings of her heart and body. This makes her dangerous.

She is dangerous.

And there she goes, that “too much” woman, making people think too much, feel too much, swoon too much. She with her authentic prose and a self-assuredness in the way she carries herself. She with her belly laughs and her insatiable appetite and her proneness to fiery passion. All eyes on her, thinking she’s hot shit.

Oh, that “too much” woman. . . too loud, too vibrant, too honest, too emotional, too smart, too intense, too pretty, too difficult, too sensitive, too wild, too intimidating, too successful, too fat, too strong, too political, too joyous, too needy—too much.

She should simmer down a bit, be taken down a couple notches. Someone should put her back in a more respectable place.

Someone should tell her.

Here I am. . . a Too Much Woman, with my too-tender heart and my too-much emotions.

A hedonist, feminist, pleasure seeker, empath. I want a lot—justice, sincerity, spaciousness, ease, intimacy, actualization, respect, to be seen, to be understood, your undivided attention, and all of your promises to be kept.

I’ve been called high maintenance because I want what I want and intimidating because of the space I occupy. I’ve been called selfish because I am self-loving. I’ve been called a witch because I know how to heal myself.

And still. . . I rise. Still, I want and feel and ask and risk and take up space.

I must.

Us Too Much Women have been facing extermination for centuries—we are so afraid of her, terrified of her big presence, of the way she commands respect and wields the truth of her feelings. We’ve been trying to stifle the Too Much Woman for eons—in our sisters, in our wives, in our daughters. And even now, even today, we shame the Too Much Woman for her bigness, for her wanting, for her passionate nature.

And still. . . she thrives.

In my own world and before my very eyes, I am witnessing the reclamation and rising up of the Too Much Woman. That Too Much Woman is also known to some as Wild Woman or the Divine Feminine. In any case, she is me, she is you, and she is loving that she’s finally, finally getting some airtime.

If you’ve ever been called “too much,” or “overly emotional,” or “bitchy,” or “stuck up,” you are likely a Too Much Woman.

And if you are. . . I implore you to embrace all that you are—all of your depth, all of your vastness; to not hold yourself in, and to never abandon yourself, your bigness, your radiance.

Forget everything you’ve heard—your too much-ness is a gift; oh yes, one that can heal, incite, liberate, and cut straight to the heart of things.

Do not be afraid of this gift, and let no one shy you away from it. Your too much-ness is magic, is medicine. It can change the world.

So please, Too Much Woman: Ask. Seek. Desire. Expand. Move. Feel. Be.

Make your waves, fan your flames, give us chills.

Please, rise.

We need you.

. . .

“Yes I am wise, but it’s wisdom born of pain”

 

Copyright © 2014-2021 Ev’Yan Whitney. All rights reserved.

https://www.evyanwhitney.com/blog/too-much-woman

image: https://www.dreamstime.com/

DIY Bentonite Clay Deodorant-Antiperspirant

A natural, safe and healthy alternative to commercial antiperspirants, that really works! I do have a history of breast cancer in my family, so it is suggested to never use commercial antiperspirants that clog your pores. I was looking for a safe, natural deodorant that works and this DIY All-Natural Deodorant is perfect! Not only does it stop odor naturally, but it contains an ingredient that actually helps to draw impurities from the skin.

Bentonite clay otherwise known as “healing clay,” is actually a volcanic ash, highly porous and absorbs the bacteria and other toxins, thus eliminating the chance to develop odor, without clogging pores. Bentonite clay deodorant can detoxify your body of toxins, parabens, and aluminum over time if you have been using commercial antiperspirants.

You can also substitute activated charcoal 1-1 for bentonite clay in this recipe, but I wear a lot of white, and the clay has a natural color.

Bentonite Clay also adds extra wetness protection by whisking away sweat, and pulls toxins from skin. Virgin coconut oil is a great natural antibacterial, and cornstarch or arrowroot absorb perspiration. You will notice it working immediately!

Ingredients:

3 T. Virgin (unrefined) Coconut Oil
3 T. Shea Butter
2 T. Baking Soda
3 T. Cornstarch or Arrowroot Powder
2 T. Bentonite Clay
15-20 drops essential oil- my favorites are: Aveda Shampure, lavender, grapefruit, lime and tangerine

Instructions:

1. Place coconut oil and shea butter in a glass bowl or jar and place the bowl/jar inside a sauce pan.
2. Add water to the saucepan (enough to surround bowl/jar but not to overflow it) and bring to a boil.
3. As water is heating up, ensure to stir coconut oil and shea butter and continue to do so until it melts.
4. Once melted, in another bowl, add the corn or arrowroot starch, baking soda and essential oils, and stir together with a rubber spatula.
5. Place in a 3 ounce jar and allow to cool at room temp or in fridge (will harden faster in fridge) until it’s reached a solid state. The quantities above, once mixed fit perfectly into a 3 oz. jar, and it is enough for about 3-6 months.
6. Cover with lid until use.

clay-deodorant

activated-charcoal-deodorant

DIY-Bentonite-Clay-Deodorant-Antiperspirant

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How To Use:

Wet underarms slightly, our use right after shower or bath.
Spoon out a small, 1/3 t. amount with a wooden scoop or with fingers and rub between fingers before applying directly to underarms.
For a regular day, one application in the morning is fine. For hotter days, workouts or if you’re particularly warm, feel free to reapply as needed.
After applying deodorant, wait a few minutes to dry, before putting on clothing.

clay-deodorant-1

clay-deodorant-1

DIY Bentonite Clay Deodorant-Antiperspirant

I was looking for a safe, natural deodorant that works and this DIY All-Natural Deodorant is perfect! Not only does it stop odor naturally, but it contains an ingredient that actually helps to draw impurities from the skin. Bentonite clay otherwise known as "healing clay," is actually a volcanic ash, highly porous and absorbs the bacteria and other toxins, thus eliminating the chance to develop odor. without clogging pores. Bentonite clay deodorant can detoxify your body of toxins, parabens, and aluminum over time if you have been using commercial antiperspirants. You can also substitute activated charcoal 1-1 for bentonite clay in this recipe, but I wear a lot of white, and the clay has a natural color. Bentonite Clay also adds extra wetness protection by whisking away sweat, and pulls toxins from skin. Virgin coconut oil is a great natural antibacterial, and cornstarch or arrowroot absorb perspiration. You will notice it working immediate!

Ingredients
  

  • 3 T. Virgin unrefined Coconut Oil
  • 3 T. Shea Butter
  • 2 T. Baking Soda
  • 3 T. Cornstarch or Arrowroot Powder
  • 2 T. Bentonite Clay
  • 15-20 drops essential oil- my favorites are: Aveda Shampure lavender, grapefruit, lime and tangerine

Instructions
 

  • Place coconut oil and shea butter in a glass bowl or jar and place the bowl/jar inside a sauce pan.
  • Add water to the saucepan (enough to surround bowl/jar but not to overflow it) and bring to a boil.
  • As water is heating up, ensure to stir coconut oil and shea butter and continue to do so until it melts.
  • Once melted, in another bowl, add the corn or arrowroot starch, baking soda and essential oils, and stir together with a rubber spatula.
  • Place in a 3 ounce jar and allow to cool at room temp or in fridge (will harden faster in fridge) until it’s reached a solid state. The quantities above, once mixed fit perfectly into a 3 oz. jar, and it is enough for about 3-6 months.
  • Cover with lid until use.

Notes

Wet underarms slightly, our use right after shower or bath.
Spoon out a small, 1/3 t. amount with a wooden scoop or with fingers and rub between fingers before applying directly to underarms.
For a regular day, one application in the morning is fine. For hotter days, workouts or if you’re particularly warm, feel free to reapply as needed.
After applying deodorant, wait a few minutes to dry, before putting on clothing.

 

Easy French Custard Pastries

Hello Everyone! My family just returned from Sweden and each afternoon, it is part of their culture to have coffee and fika, meaning some type of cake or pastry. I was sadly ill for a few months, but am recovering and happy to have my family home to start cooking again! We have an urban homestead and raise 6 chickens, and they are now making 4-6 eggs every day, so I am finding creative ways to use our eggs. These pastries are decadent, but not altogether unhealthy, and are surprisingly easy to whip up on a Sunday afternoon.

Makes 18 pastries.

CUSTARD INGREDIENTS:

5 large egg yolks
3 cups whole milk
1/2 cup sugar
1/3 cup cornstarch
3/4 tsp. vanilla

GLAZE INGREDIENTS:

1 cup of powdered sugar
1/4 cup whole milk
1 tsp. vanilla

OTHER INGREDIENTS:

1 packet of puff pastry defrosted

1 jar of organic apricot jam

TOOLS:

parchment paper

rubber spatula

basting brush

IMG_0354

DIRECTIONS:

1. Whisk egg yolks in a bowl and then stir in milk until blended. In another bowl, mix sugar and cornstarch. In a  large heavy saucepan, pour dry mixture and then gradually stir in a small amount of milk mixture, whisking until smooth.

2. Slowly cook over medium-low heat, stirring constantly to prevent burning, until mixture thickens and comes to a boil, about 15 minutes, and then immediately remove from heat.

3. Cool custard in freezer quickly for 10 minutes or until thoroughly chilled about an hour. You can also place bowl in a larger bowl filled with ice-cubes and water to expedite.

4. While the custard is cooling, preheat oven to 400 degrees F. Open both square of puff pastry and place on a floured cutting board. Cut each into 9 squares.

5. When the custard is ready, whisk again to remove skin and clumps and place about 2T. of custard diagonal to each square. Fold each corner to close and pinch dough in center.

6. Cut parchment paper, and place onto two cookie sheets. Transfer pastries to cookie sheets and bake for about 15-20 minutes until puffed and golden brown.

7. While they cooling, brush with apricot jam and then make the glaze by slowly heating the powered sugar whisking in only a tiny bit a milk until it is smooth and creamy, add vanilla and whisk again.

8. Cool pastries and drizzle glaze, serve when cooled.

IMG_0353  IMG_0357 IMG_0356IMG_0359

custard-pastries

Easy French Custard Pastries

These pastries are decadent, but not altogether unhealthy, and are surprisingly easy to whip up on a Sunday afternoon.

Equipment

  • Parchment Paper
  • rubber spatula
  • Basting Brush

Ingredients
  

CUSTARD INGREDIENTS:

  • 5 large egg yolks
  • 3 cups whole milk
  • 1/2 cup sugar
  • 1/3 cup cornstarch
  • 3/4 tsp. vanilla

GLAZE INGREDIENTS:

  • 1 cup of powdered sugar
  • 1/4 cup whole milk
  • 1 tsp. vanilla

OTHER INGREDIENTS:

  • 1 packet of puff pastry defrosted
  • 1 jar of organic apricot jam

Instructions
 

  • Whisk egg yolks in a bowl and then stir in milk until blended. In another bowl, mix sugar and cornstarch. In a large heavy saucepan, pour dry mixture and then gradually stir in a small amount of milk mixture, whisking until smooth.
  • Slowly cook over medium-low heat, stirring constantly to prevent burning, until mixture thickens and comes to a boil, about 15 minutes, and then immediately remove from heat.
  • Cool custard in freezer quickly for 10 minutes or until thoroughly chilled about an hour. You can also place bowl in a larger bowl filled with ice-cubes and water to expedite.
  • While the custard is cooling, preheat oven to 400 degrees F. Open both square of puff pastry and place on a floured cutting board. Cut each into 9 squares.
  • When the custard is ready, whisk again to remove skin and clumps and place about 2T. of custard diagonal to each square. Fold each corner to close and pinch dough in center.
  • Cut parchment paper, and place onto two cookie sheets. Transfer pastries to cookie sheets and bake for about 15-20 minutes until puffed and golden brown.
  • While they cooling, brush with apricot jam, and make the glaze by slowly heating the powered sugar whisking in only a tiny bit a milk until it is smooth and creamy, add vanilla and whisk again.
  • Cool pastries and drizzle glaze, serve when cooled.

custard-pastries

 

 

 

Bulletproof Mushroom Coffee

Turn your morning coffee into a deeply nutritive health enhancement with collagen and adaptogenic botanical mushrooms! I’ve discovered the absolute best recipe for making a quick and easy and super creamy and satisfying morning coffee with decadent, vegan coconut oil based heavy whipping cream which inherently has a lot of healthy fats from MCT oil and coconut butter, and a mushroom master blend for vibrant health. If you’re not a vegetarian you can add a small scoop well sourced, hydrolyzed collagen for essential cell regenerative peptides (yes, I think that collagen is an invaluable fountain of youth!). This is no ordinary coffee, it transforms your ordinary morning drink into a powerful elixir of energy boosting, self care.

mushroom-bulletproof-coffee

 

About Adaptogenic Mushrooms

Adaptogenic Mushrooms are superfoods and have many life and “chi” enhancing benefits and are powerful substances, you only need to add the 1/2 to 1/4 teaspoon amount included in the pouch per cup. Included in this blend* are:

    • Agaricus Blazei – This tropical species is native to Brazil and is known for its high content of polysaccharide compounds. Agaricus blazei is also known for its effects on triglycerides and cholesterol management.

 

    • Antrodia – Native to Taiwan, Antrodia has an abundance of research related to its liver protective and immunity-enhancing qualities.

 

    • Chaga – Often referred to as the “king of medicinal mushrooms”, Chaga has been used extensively by Traditional Healers in North America, Europe and Asia for centuries. Chaga contains a complex array of bioactive compounds with significant antioxidant and immunity-supporting activities.

 

    • Cordyceps – Improves vitality and endurance naturally by supporting respiration, oxygen delivery and ATP synthesis. Cordyceps supports aerobic endurance in athletes and research related to general vitality in senior populations gives this mushroom species broad appeal. Cordyceps is also known for its ability to increase circulation and enhance male sexual performance.

 

    • King Trumpet – Improves vitality and endurance naturally by supporting respiration, oxygen delivery and ATP synthesis. Cordyceps supports aerobic endurance in athletes and research related to general vitality in senior populations gives this mushroom species broad appeal. Cordyceps is also known for its ability to increase circulation and enhance male sexual performance.

 

    • Lion’s Mane – Reported in many studies to stimulate the synthesis of Nerve Growth Factor (NGF), a protein that promotes the growth and normal function of nerve cells. NGF is important for cognitive and neurological health.

 

    • Maitake – Maitake contains an array of 1,3/1,6 beta-glucan compounds that have a positive impact on immune function. Maitake has also been shown to help support healthy blood-sugar levels and reduce insulin resistance.

 

    • Reishi – Revered in Traditional Medicine as the “Mushroom of Immortality”, Reishi has a variety of attributes. Reishi acts as an immune potentiator and immune modulator – helping to balance and down regulate an overactive immune system. Reishi has also been studied for its cardiovascular health benefits. Considered a “superior adaptogen”, Reishi assists in adapting to mental and physical stressors.

 

    • Shiitake – Shiitake is an excellent culinary mushroom species with significant therapeutic properties that include liver, cardiovascular and immune support. New research on the properties of active ingredients in Shiitake has expanded the use of this mushroom to include applications ranging from oral health products to detoxification support.

 

    • Turkey Tail – One of the most researched of all medicinal mushrooms for its powerful polysaccharides. The beta glucans and other nutrients found in Turkey Tail support immune health.

*Text Courtesy of https://www.pharmaca.com/om-mushrooms-master-blend-90g

pexels-michael-telitsyn-9597366

INGREDIENTS:

You can double or triple recipe

8 oz. quality roasted coffee like the Swedish Gevalia
1 T. coconut based, dairy free heavy whipping cream (or 1 tsp. coconut butter and  1 tsp. MCT. Oil)
1/2 tsp. grass fed hydrolyzed collagen peptide powder
1/2 tsp. Master Blend Mushroom Powder (or equivalent of your preferred mushroom powder)
1/4 – 1/2 tsp. raw honey (optional)
pinch of cinnamon, cardamon or nutmeg to top

INSTRUCTIONS:

Place all ingredients into a a small blender and blend until smooth and frothy. Pour into your morning mug, sip and enjoy!

mushroom-bulletproof-coffee1

Morning bulletproof coffee in the sun. (Yes, that’s my kitten in the back photobombing!)

mushoom-bulletproof-coffee2

Bulletproof Mushroom Coffee

Turn your morning coffee into a deeply nutritive health enhancement with collagen and adaptogenic botanical mushrooms! I've discovered the absolute best recipe for making a quick and easy and super creamy and satisfying morning coffee with decadent, vegan coconut oil based heavy whipping cream which inherently has a lot of healthy fats from MCT oil and coconut butter, and a mushroom master blend for vibrant health. If you're not a vegetarian you can add a small scoop well sourced collagen for essential cell regenerative peptides (yes, I think that collagen is an invaluable fountain of youth!). This is no ordinary coffee, it transforms your ordinary morning drink into a powerful elixir of energy boosting, self care.

Ingredients
  

  • 8 oz. quality roasted coffee like the Swedish Gevalia
  • 1 T. coconut based dairy free heavy whipping cream (or 1 tsp. coconut butter and 1 tsp. MCT. Oil)
  • 1/2 tsp. grass fed hydrolyzed collagen peptide powder
  • 1/2 tsp. Master Blend Mushroom Powder or equivalent of your preferred mushroom powder
  • 1/4 - 1/2 tsp. raw honey optional
  • pinch of cinnamon cardamon or nutmeg to top

Instructions
 

  • Place all ingredients into a a small blender and blend until smooth and frothy. Pour into your morning mug, sip and enjoy!

Notes

Adaptogenic Mushrooms have many life and "chi" enhancing benefits and are powerful substances, you only need to add the 1/2 to 1/4 teaspoon amount included in the pouch per cup.

 

Photo: Michael Telitsyn https://www.pexels.com/photo/brown-mushrooms-on-the-ground-9597366/

AND HOW TO DO BETTER

 

SELF CARE IS SACRED

LETTING PEOPLE GO WHO CONSTANTLY HURT, BLAME AND DEVALUE YOU WITHOUT REGRET MAY VERY WELL BE ONE OF THE MOST LIFE SAVING GESTURES OF LOVE YOU COULD LEARN

One of the most hurtful and dismissive non-apology apologies is for someone to say: “I’m sorry you feel that way.” It has been said to me about half dozen times by people and communities that I previously thought valued and respected me, or that were friends. It is one of the hidden tricks in an abuser’s toolbox. So let’s examine it for one minute. You’ve come to someone after they’ve been unkind, and you have care, respect and value for that person. You bravely talk about something that might have been hurtful that needs to be discussed openly. You may be an empathetic person that values healthy relational resolution. You may have invested years of friendship or in a working environment, and actually believed that you were valued and cared about. Part of health, transparency and clearing up negative karma, would be in fact, to bring to light and openly discuss something that one has done that was hurtful or insensitive, in order to clear the air and move forward in healthy way. You take a leap and venture into a slight risk of confrontation and say “hey what you said/did was really hurtful or curt and I’d  like to talk about it so we can move forward.”

And here it comes…

The armored, dismissive, narcissistic gut punch…

I’M SORRY YOU FEEL THAT WAY

Ugh! Verbal violence extraordinaire, packed neatly into 6 small cutting words, usually followed up by a victim blaming, defensive counter blame and a litany of self justified excuses. You were not heard, cared about and the abuser has now doubled down, and threw your heart and all dignity under a bus. Where do we find these people, really? Where were they raised? I won’t say a barn, because my daughter works on a farm and the animals, sadly have more natural respect to each other than we often do.

Now, there is one caveat if you do hear these words, and in this case, there is sincere care. If I for example, were to wake up with a migraine and my husband says “I’m sorry you feel that way,” this is not the gaslight-y intention we are referring to above.

Abusers do not want to be accountable, ever. Let me say, ever. They are emotionally and developmentally immature, and their reactive pride is far outweighed over your feelings and longing to be heard and the pain, resolved. There are some versions of the dismissive non-apology, victim blaming to be on alert for:

 

“I’m sorry you feel that way.”

“I’m sorry you felt that way.”

“You are being dramatic.”

“It’s not my fault you feel upset, you need to own…”

“Why are you so sensitive/emotional/reactive?”

“Can we just move on, why are you holding this?”

“No one else [or insert name drop of another enabler] would have a problem with what I said.”

 

Please dear ones that care for others, strive for healthy, open and transparent relationships where there is mutual respect, appreciation and value. If you hear any of these false non-apologies, these are intended only to hurt and blame you further. I can recall two times, one recently with a girlfriend and one a few months ago where I got the “I’m sorry feel that way” non-apology and I regret to say it, but it is usually the blazing red flag sign of the end of the friendship.

I Resigned That Day

Another time, I worked for a particularly dysfunctional dharma community, and I was actually yelled at by the director. I was running their website and we had a teacher event coming and I was brand-new to the community. As a volunteer I mistakenly chose the wrong image of another teacher who was coming from Nepal. It was a digital image that I put on the website. As soon as the director told me about it I immediately made the correction apologized profusely for my error.

He turned around and yelled me and accused me of being careless even accused me of being racist, and I was so distraught that I cried. That’s no way to treat an unpaid volunteer, or even a paid one! It turned out that that community had a long list of people that could not work under this director. I recently discussed a lot of these people in these “dharmic” communities have narcissistic tendencies and can be just downright unkind behind the scenes.

They wanted me to continue working and I did too, but I said “how you treated me was very unkind and I don’t feel comfortable and it doesn’t feel safe to continue unless the director had some accountability.” This is what’s called a behavior change request in relationships. And I think it safe to say, you can imagine the response that I got from the director and his assistant. They said to me- here goes…. “we’re sorry you felt that way.” No apology for the unkindness that hedged on abuse, no regrets for my tears it is basically saying a gentleman’s “eff you.” I resigned that day. This pattern repeated itself to a greater or lesser degree with some supposedly dharmic organizations I volunteered for. For many years, I truly blamed myself, but now, stepping back and reviewing, it wasn’t all me.

sorry

Please friends, do not allow yourself to be hurt or gaslit and manipulated by unkind (non)-friends or unhealthy communities or workplaces. Do not allow them the power over you to make you feel bad about yourself. If you came to someone with sincerity, an olive branch of longing to be heard to talk about what was hurtful or what was not helpful and the person just dismisses you and has no accountability, it is time to walk away.

I do tend to be a bit Polyanna and codependent always hold on to friendships, oftentimes I’ll give them one more chance and say “hey that wasn’t really an apology I’m still hurt about X,Y and Z,” the original issue. If I’m ghosted, blocked or they respond to me with defense rather than any humility or regret, then it is time to stop the madness and put a firm shut to that door.

Before You Say “I’m sorry you feel that way.”

Now, I know it is part of our survival system that human beings are hardwired to get defensive when confronted. If you do truly value the person and they come with some type of pain or misunderstanding or seeming conflict, and they long to be heard and for resolve, please self reflect as a first step. What they are saying to you just may actually have some validity.

If they truly misheard or misinterpreted something please don’t (ever) say “I’m sorry you feel that way.” You can always say “I’m sorry this happened between us” if you truly did no harm. The best is if someone expresses something to you, take a moment before reacting or defending yourself, sit with it, put yourself in their shoes. Try to see if there’s anything that you might have done and could have done better. I believe you will find something. Once you find it, you can say “you know what I was a little bit unkind or insensitive and for that I’m sorry.” It doesn’t take that much to heal friendships, we all make mistakes, sometimes we have ask ourselves if it is worth a tiny modicum of self-awareness and putting our pride aside to simply, apologize. I think it is. Accountability is kindness, compassion and health.

 


Photo by Anete Lusina from Pexels
Photo by Vie Studio from Pexels

(trigger warning) We’ve been here before, right on the precipice of the very end of times with such global volatility. People and children are dying as we speak. Only 12 days ago, Ukrainian citizens were at home, warm with their families and now many have had to flee and thousands of lives lost. With our nuclear capability and valid threats from dangerous world powers, at any moment, all life as we know it on this planet could cease, conceivably, even by 5pm tonight. We are indeed at 100 seconds to midnight. The Indian Vedas call this the Kali Yuga, the era of destruction and grave loss of life. It is the culmination of longstanding acts of human greed, unkindness, conflict, abuse of the vulnerable, hatred, division and living out of balance with the earth’s natural resources. We all know very well, that we have arrived in this dark time in human civilization, but what can we do?

SECRET TRANSMISSION FROM RETREAT

Since we may or may not have much time left, I’d like to reveal a secret or two. About three years ago I was working in state politics and even going to Washington D.C. and trying to be an activist as Trump had come into power, and many were living in constant fear and trauma. He was aligning with powerful, authoritarian dictators like Putin and North Korea, and this all seemed so dangerous. How can I take vows to be a help to our world and only escape into the opiation of my religion? I was disheartened that more of my friends didn’t get involved. I would go back and forth from meditation retreat to recharge and then back to the front line, hobnobbing with change-makers, activists and even some world leaders.

During that time, it was about a year before covid hit, I was here practicing in my meditation retreat house in southern Colorado. I was praying to the lineage of enlightened masters and Buddhas, our ancestral, collective wisdom. You could call it our collective unconscious, source, inner wisdom, insight, higher self, akashic, this body of wisdom has many names. Sometimes, I ask for advice, it’s not really praying to anyone theistically outside of me that exists like a god or spirits, it’s more of non-dual supplication to access inner wisdom and clear seeing. I was here for about a month meditating about 8 to 10 hours a day. We’re not really supposed to reveal anything happens on retreat but I will share this little snippet because it seems relevant.

I was asking the imagined lineage of enlightened masters (Guru Rinpoche) what I should do with my life to help our hurting world, and if I should continue to work as a political activist. I had applied to work for a progressive Senator in D.C., and had thoughts about running for office in Southern Colorado, etc. Then strangely enough, a whole entire piece of information came into my mind and I imagined that it was from this collective wisdom of the enlightened Buddhas. We had a conversation, if you will.

It was a bit foreboding, but I will share what they said- they said to me “Dawn we have something to tell you.” With a slight pause I listened to the information and more came. They said- in your lifetime you’re going to experience tremendous global upheaval and loss of life. They said- we want you to prepare now for these darker times. They said for me that I must stop being addicted to social media and wasting my life on “virtue signaling” and time wasting attention seeking, collecting endless “likes” on Facebook and Instagram and rather firmly CUT that addiction and recommit to my meditation practice.

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They said- “We want you to practice for a full two hours in the morning two hours in the evening, and that will give you about four hours of practice a day. They said- if you meditate and implement the powerful practices that we’ve imparted to you, you will develop an inner fortitude to be able to withstand these darker times. I asked is there anything I can do, I would offer my entire life to help our world, I’ll go to Washington D.C., I’ll put myself in front of world powers as a peacemaker; I’ll do anything, what can we all do to stop the momentum of this darkness?” Right now, we are now helping with what we can, e.g. I’m giving money to Save The Children, Doctors without Borders, we are writing letters to our reps and encouraging big companies and banks to sanction Russia. What else?

The “inner wisdom” as I recall, replied: “Unfortunately the dark forces have been gleaning power globally for a very long time now and there’s not a whole lot that people can do to completely stop the momentum of this karmic unfolding.” They advised, you as a private citizen can do some small things to lessen the harm, but in general, we just have to let most of it run its course. However, what ‘we’ can offer to you, if you do these meditation practices as we have suggested, you can get through this time without any fear.”

Right now, I have the safety and privilege to meditate, but even that could change, and quickly. No nation, no one is safe from being touched by this. It will not help for me to only read the news and internet feed all day, and panic, being overcome by hopelessness and fear. We can’t practice if debilitated and destabilized, nor can we take any social action. Now is the time to develop inner strength and fearlessness in the face of the darkest days. This is the ultimate protection.

THE HEROIC JOURNEY OF THE HEART

I often think of the quintessential heroic journey like Frodo from Lord of the Rings. He lived in such dark times, and his quest was to bravely retain his own goodness, heart, faith and inner light, even at the seeming end of times, even as he had to venture into the very molten front-lines of destruction. We truly don’t know how much time we have, ever. I have a good friend who used to live here in my mountain town, and just fell down with a seizure last week and is now on life support. He’s my age. Next week, another variant of Covid, may come into our population and restart the pandemic. If the global powers and Russian citizens and their military don’t put a stop to this bloodshed, midnight might be… tonite.

Stay strong, calm, clear, loving and grounded dear friends, now is the time to have accomplishment. Forgive yourself for all mistakes, all harm you did, all hearts you hurt, and completely forgive those that hurt you. I forgive everyone, including myself. The past two years were so hard for me and many of us: Trump, covid, such loss of life, economic challenges, constant fires even in my town and incessant natural disasters, an insurrection, my heart was utterly broken again and again by friends and family and sangha I loved and trusted. I lost the outer constuct of my religion because of dated theocracy, deluded spiritual codependency, and abuse to students and children. It’s been samsara on steroids. Welcome… we have indeed entered the Kaliyuga.

With that said, every moment is new, and in a instant, we can wipe all karma clear in our mind and heart, and be in the warmth of our love and human goodness. This is our nature, our birthright that can be cultivated and can never be taken from us, even with our last breath. The inner light always, always shines even in the darkest of times. Love to you all, always, no matter how many seconds we have left.

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A candle for Ukraine, a candle for us all. May we find our inner light in times of such darkness.

 


Photo by Cup of Couple from Pexels
Photo by Oyster Haus from Pexels

Smörgåstårta- A Swedish Sandwich Party Cake

My family is a Swedish/American hybrid and I am proud to say that I’ve learned to make a really healthy and decadent traditional Swedish Sandwich Party Cake called a Smörgåstårta, yes it’s like a smorgasbord. I rarely use any meat or seafood and very few animal products, but this follows our Whole Foods Plant Based Diet, so once a year, I make this shrimp, salmon and caviar cake for my husband’s birthday! We did discuss creating a vegan version of this, maybe we can create that for next year. Once you compile all of the ingredients, it’s easy to put together. Some people use edible flowers too, this cake is truly a work of art and can feed many at once.

Serves: 6-8

Smorgastarta

Ingredients:

8 oz. ready made- salmon, whitefish, krab or egg salad spread or home make your own
1 lb. medium cold water shrimp- cooked, peeled, de-veined and de-tailed, chilled
1 lb. Norwegian smoked salmon filet, (or gravlax) sliced
5-6 hard boiled eggs peeled and sliced
16 slices of quality organic white/potato bread (1- 1lb. loaf of organic white/potato bread with crusts cut off)
8 oz. Neufchatel cream cheese
8 oz. organic sour cream
1 cup Veganaise
3 T. fresh dill chopped
1 long organic British cucumber washed and thinly sliced
1/4 cup organic radishes washed and thinly sliced
1 organic lemon thinly sliced
1 cup organic cherry tomatoes quartered
Optional: Kalles Caviar to taste
ground black pepper to taste

gravlax

Smorgastarta-egg Smorgas-tarta-layers

Instructions:

First, prepare Smörgåstårta “frosting”: In a mixing bowl use a whisk to combine cream cheese, sour cream and mayonnaise until smooth.

Slice all vegetables as directed above.
Take 1/2 of the shrimp and slice lengthwise.
Place four slice of bread on a larger serving plate.
Spread all of the chosen [salmon] spread all over the first bread slices.
Layer with thin slices of cucumber.
Slather some of the Smörgåstårta cream frosting on another 4 pieces of bread and place over the cucumber layer.
Spread some of the Smörgåstårta cream frosting all over the second layer of bread slices.
Break up about 1/2 of the smoked salmon and place on top of cream.
Spread some of the cream frosting all over the bottom of the third layer of bread slices, and place on top.
Spread some of the cream frosting all over the top of the third layer of bread slices.
Place the sliced shrimp on top of cream, and then sliced eggs to fit.
Top with the fourth layer of bread.
Take the rest of the Smörgåstårta cream and frost like a cake with a rubber spatula.
Warm and wet a butter-knife and smooth.
Decorate the cake artfully with remaining ingredients, making smoked salmon “roses,” alternating with remaining cucumber, radishes and shrimp.
Finish with fresh ground pepper and Kalles caviar.

Swedish-Smorgastarta

Smorgastarta-swedish-cake

Smörgåstårta- A Swedish Sandwich Party Cake

My family is a Swedish/American hybrid and I am proud to say that I've learned to make a really healthy and decadent traditional Swedish Sandwich Party Cake called a Smörgåstårta, yes it's like a smorgasbord. I rarely use any meat and very few animal products, but this follows the Whole Foods Plant Based Diet, so once a year, I make this shrimp, salmon and caviar cake for my husband's birthday! Once you compile all of the ingredients, it's easy to put together. Some people use edible flowers too, this cake is truly a work of art and can feed many at once.

Ingredients
  

  • 8 oz. ready made- salmon whitefish, Krab or egg salad spread or home make your own
  • 1 lb. medium cold water shrimp- cooked peeled, de-veined and de-tailed, chilled
  • 1 lb. Norwegian smoked salmon filet sliced
  • 5-6 hard boiled eggs peeled and sliced
  • 16 slices quality organic white/potato bread 1 1lb. loaf of organic white/potato bread with crusts cut off
  • 8 oz. Neufchatel cream cheese
  • 8 oz. organic sour cream
  • 1 cup Veganaise
  • 3 T. fresh dill chopped
  • 1 long organic British cucumber washed and thinly sliced
  • 1/4 cup organic radishes washed and thinly sliced
  • 1 organic lemon thinly sliced
  • 1 cup organic cherry tomatoes quartered
  • Optional: Kalles Caviar to taste
  • ground black pepper to taste

Instructions
 

  • Slice all vegetables as directed above.
  • Take 1/2 of the shrimp and slice lengthwise.
  • Place four slice of bread on a larger serving plate.
  • Spread all of the chosen [salmon] spread all over the first bread slices.
  • Layer with thin slices of cucumber.
  • Slather some of the Smörgåstårta cream frosting on another 4 pieces of bread and place over the cucumber layer.
  • Spread some of the Smörgåstårta cream frosting all over the second layer of bread slices.
  • Break up about 1/2 of the smoked salmon and place on top of cream.
  • Spread some of the cream frosting all over the bottom of the third layer of bread slices, and place on top.
  • Spread some of the cream frosting all over the top of the third layer of bread slices.
  • Place the sliced shrimp on top of cream.
  • Top with the fourth layer of bread.
  • Take the rest of the Smörgåstårta cream and frost like a cake with a rubber spatula.
  • Warm and wet a butter-knife and smooth.
  • Decorate the cake artfully with remaining ingredients, making smoked salmon "roses," alternating with remaining cucumber, radishes and shrimp.
  • Finish with fresh ground pepper and Kalles caviar.

Notes

Serves: 6-8
The Polish Journal of the Arts and Culture. New Series 2
(2/2015): 29–41 [article]
DOI: 10.4467/24506249PJ.15.007.4635

Nying Lung Disorder, or Tibetan Medicine Perspective on Depression

Anastazja Holečko

Abstract
Traditional Tibetan medicine perceives so prevalent mental problems as an imbalance of the subtle Wind energy, or Lung in Tibetan. It is one of the three humors (rlung, mkhris pa, bad kan) that govern our health. When out of balance, Lung can cause such symptoms as emotional lab- ility, anxiety, panic attacks, depression, or bipolar disorder, to mention just a few. Over millennia Tibetan medicine has compiled a system of effective methods to rebalance the three humors and bring back the state of health. To the healing methods belong therapeutic diet and lifestyle, herbal compounds, and a wide range of external therapies, such as Tibetan massage kunye, moxa, horme, or yukcho. On top of that spiritual healing, connected with Buddhist tradition, is applicable.

Keywords: Tibetan medicine, depression, nying lung, horme, yukcho, nejang.

Lek. med. Anastazja Holečko is a medical doctor, graduated from the Medical University of Lodz, living and practicing in Prague, Czech Republic. She has completed the studies of traditional Tibetan medicine at the International Academy of Traditional Tibetan Medi- cine (IATTM), and did the internships in Dharamsala, India and Amdo, Tibet. She is the chef editor of the “Journal of Traditional Tibetan Medicine”.
e-mail: nastimi@gmail.com https://www.happyandhealthy.cz/en


Introduction

One of the most common complaints of our busy modern times is, gently speaking, lack of mental calmness. It extends from relatively mild forms like attention deficit, restlessness, insomnia, emotional lability, lack of concentration, anxiety, burnout, to more serious mental disorders like panic attacks, bipolar disorder and depression.

Defined as “a common mental disorder that presents with depressed mood, loss of interest or pleasure, decreased energy, feelings of guilt or low self-esteem, disturbed sleep or appetite, and poor concentration”, it becomes a more and more frequent problem not only in the developed countries. According to the WHO, depression affects 350 million people worldwide, and it will be the leading cause of disease burden worldwide by 2030. If burnout, grief reactions and other stress related disorders were included in the diagnosis-criteria of depression, this could lead to a lifetime prevalence of about 80%.¹ People with depressed mood can feel sad, anxious, empty, hopeless, helpless, worthless, guilty, irritable or restless. Insomnia, excessive sleeping, fatigue, aches, pains, digestive problems or reduced energy may also be present.² While our Western physicians tend to concentrate on physical complains, ignoring mental state of a patient, this immense mental suffering can even lead to suicide. The treatment of depression brings many side effects and is not in long term successful.

On the other hand, traditional Tibetan medicine can offer a cure for such problems. It is based on a natural healing system, as well as on Buddhist view. Although Tibetan medicine originated from the Bon tradition approximately four thousands year ago, over the time the Buddhist elements soaked in and became an inseparable part of this medical tradition. Already in the second century ce two Ayurvedic doctors moved to Tibet from India, to spread their knowledge in the Land of Snow. However, the biggest impact on development of Tibetan medicine had “transplantation” of Buddhist teachings to Tibet by Guru Rinpoche (pad ma ‘byung gnas, 730–810 ce) in the 8th century ce. At these times, when Tibet was under a rule of a Tibetan king Trisong Detsen (khri srong lde btsan, 742–798 ce), there took place a significant historical event – the First Congress on Traditional Tibetan Medicine in Samye, where the most eminent doctors from all the neighboring countries came

¹Jean-Pierre Lépine and Mike Briley, The increasing burden of depression, passim. ²Depression, [www 01], 2012.
to share their medical knowledge.

It was then that outstanding doctor and a Buddhist practitioner called Yuthok Yonten Gonpo (g.yu thog yon tan gon po, 729–854 ce), became known as a founder of Tibetan medicine. He combined the knowledge from the ancient texts (like Bum zhi – first Tibetan text on medicine), his deep personal experience and wisdom, and teachings from the doctors from the other countries to create Gyu shi (rgyud bzhi), the Four Medical Tantras that became the basis for traditional Tibetan medicine.

Yuthok stressed that for achieving a stable health, both physical and mental, it is crucial to engage into spiritual development and work with mind. And so he wrote his second “jewel” – Yuthok nying tig (g.yu thog snying tig), the cycle of spiritual practices for Tibetan doctors and lay practitioners.³

Also the original name of Tibetan medicine – Sowa Rigpa (gso ba rig pa) reflects the importance of mental work. Sowa is usually translated as “healing” and rigpa as “science”, resulting in “healing science”. However, it can also be translated as sowa “nourishment” and rigpa as “awareness”, giving “nourishment of awareness”. It seeks the real causes of all suffering, both physical and mental, and is coherent with the Buddhist view on that.

So what is the principal cause of all suffering? According to Tibetan medicine, it is the ignorance of our true nature and the nature of universe (Tib. marigpa). Due to this basic ignorance we perceive the world in a dualistic way, which gives rise to 84000 of disturbing emotions. They can be summarized to three main emotions, called also mind poisons: attachment, aversion and confusion. Those are closely connected with the energies in our body, so-called Three Humors (nye pa gsum): Wind (rlung), Bile (mkhrispa) and Phlegm (badkan). Imbalance of the Three Humors manifests later on as a disease on a physical level.⁴

Screen-Shot-2022-01-06-at-12.03.13-PM

Table 1: The Three Humors

³Dr Nida Chenagtsang, The Path to Rainbow Body – introduction to Yuthok Nyingtig, passim.
⁴Dr Nida Chenagtsang, Sorig basics – Root tantra, passim.

Chronic stress, extremely busy life style, lack of sleep, improper food, is something our nervous and hormonal systems are not handling well in longer term. It leads to chronic elevation of stress hormones like cortisol, and later on to adrenal burnout, which affects multiple functions of our body and mind.

From the Tibetan medicine point of view, it brings imbalance on the energy level, the three humors, and those affect both the mind and the body. The most often target of such an unbalanced lifestyle is Lung humor, responsible for the mental health.
The direct translation of Lung is Wind, and its nature is constant movement. Its functions are highly complex. Its subtle part (phra rlung) is inseparably connected with mind, constituting its movement aspect, à côté de awareness aspect. It can be compared to a horse on which the mind rides. Movement enables the constant flow of thoughts, emotions, and perception.
The gross aspect of Lung (rags rlung) manifests on energy level as five so-called karmic Winds. Each of them plays important role in the body functioning, from breathing, swallowing, excreting, to transmitting nervous signals to brain, and regulating heart beat. In the table 2 below the functions of each karmic Lung are listed in detail.

Depression in particular is caused by Lung disorder in the heart. Heart is one of the Lung locations in the body – the seat of All-pervading Lung. When it is in balance, it governs the heartbeat, controls sense organs, the skin pores, and all bodily movements. Abnormal function of Lung in the heart is called Nying Lung (snying rlung) and brings the symptoms of depression.

According to Tibetan medicine, the primary cause of Lung disorder is ignorance and excessive desire/attachment. However, there are also secondary causes, or conditions, that are necessary for a disorder to manifest. While primary causes can be compared to a seed sewn in mind, secondary causes are like soil, water and sun that enable the seed to grow.
To secondary causes in Tibetan medicine belong: diet, lifestyle, seasons, and negative external influences. From these, diet and lifestyle are of special importance, because we decide on them every day. Thus we can choose whether to support our health, or bring further imbalance to our system.

In the table 3 below there are specified secondary causes increasing Lung imbalance.

Screen-Shot-2022-01-06-at-12.05.25-PM

 

Screen-Shot-2022-01-06-at-12.05.40-PM
Table 3: Secondary causes that increase Lung

We keep planning the future, we dwell in the past, regretting what has happened, and rarely enjoying the present moment – the only one truly existing. Our mind becomes in a way “detached” from the body, from the powerful moment being “here and now”. Such busy, unstable mind is easily provoked by so-called immediate causes that trigger the Lung reaction. It can be grief and sorrow, e.g. lost of dear ones, bad news and unpleasant events, stress and overworking, overexerting of body, speech or mind.
Particularly susceptible to Nying Lung are people of Lung typology who have an inclination to Lung disorders from birth. Deprivation of love, friendship, or wealth, also contributes to Lung imbalance. Predisposing factors are also unhealthy heart and disturbances in the central channel.

Symptoms

The signs and symptoms of Lung in the heart that a Tibetan doctor looks for while taking the medical history, are as follows:

  • sudden, uncontrolled movements of the body
  • tremor
  • intolerance to touch and noise
  • unclear answers
  • attention deficit
  • heart discomfort
  • fainting, dizziness
  • restlessness, unsettling thoughts, talkativeness
  • fear, panic attacks
  • hallucinations
  • insomnia
  • difficult inhalation and sighing
  • high or hoarse voice
  • pain in the joints

On top of history taking a Tibetan doctor checks also patientʼs pulse, urine and sense organs. The indication of Lung excess would be empty, floating pulse, clear, bubbly urine and dry, red, rough tongue.⁵

Lung treatment

What concerns treatment, the patient is always approached holistically in Tibetan medicine. When causes of imbalance are found, the treatment is aimed to remove the causes and re-install the balance on all the levels: physical, energy, and mental.
There are four main methods of treatment in TTM: diet, lifestyle, herbal medicines, and external therapies. They aim to find an antidote that would rebalance Lung. Lungʼs six characteristics are: subtle, light, cold, mobile, rough, dry. Therefore the substances, be it the food, drinks, or medicines, of same qualities will increase it, and those with the opposite qualities (heavy, oily, warm, stable, soft) will pacify it.⁶

⁵Dr Sonam Dolma, Nying Lung.
⁶Yuthok Yonten Gonpo, The Root Tantra and Explanatory Tantra from the Four Tantras of Tibetan Medicine, passim.

Characteristics and manifestations Antidote

Screen-Shot-2022-01-06-at-12.14.24-PM

Table 4: Characterstics of Lung and its antidotes

In the table 5 below, there are specified the healing methods for Nying Lung.

Diet

Warm, oily, nutritious foods, like bone and meat broth, nettle, onion, garlic, tsampa, beef, sheep, horse meat, aged meat, aged butter, seed oils, milk, chang

Lifestyle

Enough sleep (8-9h); Warm, cosy, dark place, devoid of distraction; warm clothes; pleasing the senses, pleasant music and words, smells, colors, soft touch; company of beloved people; contact with nature

Medicines

Soups prepared from: nutmeg, red salt, asafetida, ginger, black salt, caraway, bones; alcohol infusions from: Asparagus, Polygonatum, Angelica, Tribulus terrestis, brown sugar, tsampa dough; powders and butters based on: nutmeg, asafetida, back salt, black pepper, long pepper, ginger, cinnamon, pomegranate, cardamom, Terminalia chebula, Tinospora cordifolia, garlic

External therapies

Tibetan massage Kunye; horme (Mongolian moxa) and moxa on Lung points; compress with oils; mild enema with warm aged butter; steam bath using bone broth
Table 5: Healing methods for Lung imbalance

The above-mentioned methods are very effective, especially when used all together. Improper diet and lifestyle has to be addressed to reach a better result and prevent recurrence of the disease. Tibetan massage Kunye (bsku mnye) has deeply relaxing and settling down effect, especially due to application of warm oil on all body surface. Horme and moxa applied on the therapeutical points connected with Lung help rebalance this humor.

    Screen-Shot-2022-01-06-at-12.14.34-PM

 

Figure 1: Warming up Lung related points with Horme

Screen-Shot-2022-01-06-at-12.14.40-PM

Figure 2: Heating the Lung points with moxa

There is a number of herbal formulas that can be applied. Many of them are based on eagle wood (Agar), like Agar 8, Agar 15, Agar 20.⁷ Among other formulas there are Srog ‘dzin 11, Sems bde, Dza ti 5, Arnag 6, or famous Bimala (Dzati nyishu yang zer), named after its founder, Vimalamitra (dri med bshes gnyen). This great master who lived in India in the 9th century ce prophesized that in future the Nying Lung disorder will be widely prevalent, people will be confused, emotionally unstable, thinking about thousands of things at the same time, and having problems concentrate on anything. He invented a formula that would calm down these symptoms.

If Bimala, or other herbal formulas for Nying Lung are not available, there is a simple recipe one can do at home. This is a tisane of the three substances: 100g of ginger, 100g of asafetida, 5g of salt (halitum violaceum). Mix all the ingredients and put a teaspoon of this compound in a glass of hot water, drink hot. It helps in case of insomnia, emotional ability, sadness, and depression. A pinch of nutmeg in warm milk before sleep can also help to balance Lung.

Spiritual healing

On top of the above-mentioned methods, in Tibetan medicine there is a fifth category of treatment, spiritual healing. Here belong various types of meditations, like mindfulness meditation, Empty Body meditation, Breathing meditations, Medicine Buddha meditation, Mantra Healing, and other. An interesting technique called Yukcho (dbyug dchos), coming from the terma tradition, is a stick massage that introduces a gentle vibration on the points of Lung, releasing its blockages (see figure 3).⁸
Another method to unblock the Lung, is Tibetan healing yoga Nejang (gnas byang). It is a medical part of Tsa Lung Trul Khor (rtsa rlung sprul ‘khor, yantra yoga), coming from the Kalachakra Tantra tradition. It uses the breath combined with body movements and self massage to purify the energy locations in the body thus using the anchor of the physical body to bring the Lung energy down. When the energy becomes balanced, then the mind can become happy (see figure 4).

⁷Jamgon Kongtrul Yonten Gyatso, Зинтиг – капли нектара: заметки для начинающих врачей, passim.
⁸Philippe Gonin, Yuk Cho – Traditional Tibetan Stick Therapy, passim.

Screen-Shot-2022-01-06-at-12.14.49-PM

Figure 3: Yukcho – stick therapyScreen-Shot-2022-01-06-at-12.15.00-PM

Figure 4: The interconnections between body, energy and mind

The patient must consciously participate in the healing process. Without taking responsibility for your own health the results are much less clear. In Tibetan medicine, the patient gets a great support on the physical and energy levels, which makes it easier to work with the primary causes of disease
– mind ignorance. Eating warm, nutritious food, taking Tibetan herbs and applying Tibetan therapies helps mind relax and settle down, tame the wild horse of Lung. But in this busy world we have to consciously create time for rest and calm, learn how to relax, find time for friends and family.

Other advices that Tibetan doctors give to depressed patients are: breathe deeply and slowly, concentrate on the positive, find inner peace. Stop complaining, donʼt blame others for what happened to you, donʼt try to explain
everything to yourself, just let it be. Accept defeat, but donʼt cling to faults. Train mindfulness, be here and now. Train bodhisattva way of life, focusing on how to help others rather than on your own problems.

The ultimate aim of healing in Tibetan medicine is convergent with the aim of Buddhist spiritual practice – to realize that the nature of mind is timeless clear light, and all its contaminations, emotions, thoughts are only transient. By dissolving the ignorance about mindʼs nature one dissolves all the suffering, be it mental or physical. Combining the profound methods of Tibetan medicine with Buddhist meditation can thus bring lasting results in treatment of depression.


Bibliography
Depression, [www 01], 2012.
Gonin Philippe, Yuk Cho – Traditional Tibetan Stick Therapy, “The Journal of Traditional Tibetan Medicine” 5, IATTM 2013.
Jamgon Kongtrul Yonten Gyatso, Зинтиг – капли нектара: заметки для начинающих врачей, Orientalia, Moskva 2014.
Lépine Jean-Pierre, Briley Mike, The increasing burden of depression, “Neuropsychiatr Dis Treat.” 2011.
Dr Nida Chenagtsang, Sorig basics – Root tantra, Sorig Publications, 2013.
Dr Nida Chenagtsang, The Path to Rainbow Body – introduction to Yuthok Nyingtig, Sorig Press, 2014.
Dr Sonam Dolma, Nying Lung, TTMIC Innsbruck, 2013.
Yuthok Yonten Gonpo, The Root Tantra and Explanatory Tantra from the Four Tantras of Tibetan Medicine, Men-TseeKhang Pulication, Dharamsala 2008.
Internet sources utilized:
[www 01] https://www.nimh.nih.gov/index.shtml
https://www.sorig.fr/wp-content/uploads/2019/01/PJAC-20152-2-Holecko_-1.pdf
Permission to re-post granted from the author on Jan.7, 2022. Photo by Michel Piccaya from Pexels

FOR MORE INFO:https://www.happyandhealthy.cz/en

Cauliflower and Leek Mashed “Potatoes”

My family absolutely loves creamy mashed potatoes with pretty much everything. However I’m tending toward a more low-carb., nutrient dense lifestyle and mashed potatoes don’t really cut it anymore. However, I discovered the best alternative. I was making cauliflower mashed that was a little bit bland, so with the addition of steamed leeks it adds more of an onion-y, spicy depth and kick to the mashed potatoes. They are a really flavorful and nutritive side dish, you will want to make often. Here, I’m using heavy whipping cream but you could substitute that for half-and-half or any unsweetened nut milk and I’m using organic salted butter but you could also substitute that for vegan butter. You could also add grated Parmesan or Gruyere cheese if desired.

Needed: Food Processor or Blender

Ingredients:

  • 1 large head organic cauliflower
  • 2 large leeks
  • 1/4 cup​ heavy cream
  • 3 tablespoons butter
  • 1 clove garlic
  • salt and pepper to taste
  • fresh or dried herbs like: parsley, dill, chives or oregano for garnish

Cauliflower-Leek-Mashed-Potatoes

Directions:

  1. Boil water in a large a large stock pan with a pinch of salt.
  2. Wash the cauliflower and the leaks and pull off any outer leaves.
  3. Coarsely chopped the cauliflower into florets.
  4. Slice the two leeks up until the tops where it gets really course and discard the course tops.
  5. Boil for about 10 to 12 minutes until everything is very soft.
  6. Drain.
  7. Add all ingredients to a food processor and blend until creamy.
  8. Place into a serving bowl and top with a garnish.
  9. Serve warm and enjoy!

Cauliflower-Leek-Mashed-Potato

Cauliflower-Leek-Mashed-Potato

Cauliflower and Leek Mashed "Potatoes"

My family absolutely loves creamy mashed potatoes with pretty much everything. However I'm tending toward a more low-carb., nutrient dense lifestyle mashed potatoes don't really cut it anymore. However, I discovered the best alternative. I was making cauliflower mashed that was a little bit bland, so with the addition of steamed leeks it adds more of an onion-y, spicy depth and kick to the mashed potatoes. They are a really flavorful and nutritive side dish, you will want to make often. Here, I'm using heavy whipping cream but you could substitute that for half-and-half or any unsweetened nut milk and I'm using organic salted butter but you could also substitute that for vegan butter. You could also add grated Parmesan or Gruyere cheese if desired.

Equipment

  • Food Processor or Blender

Ingredients
  

  • 1 large head organic cauliflower
  • 2 large leeks
  • 1/4 cup​ heavy cream
  • 3 tablespoons butter
  • 1 clove garlic
  • salt and pepper to taste
  • fresh or dried parsley or oregano for garnish

Instructions
 

  • Boil water in a large a large stock pan with a pinch of salt.
  • Wash the cauliflower and the leaks and pull off any outer leaves.
  • Coarsely chopped the cauliflower into florets.
  • Slice the two leeks up until the tops where it gets really course and discard the course tops.
  • Boil for about 10 to 12 minutes until everything is very soft.
  • Drain.
  • Add all ingredients to a food processor and blend until creamy.
  • Place into a serving bowl and top with a garnish.
  • Serve warm and enjoy!

Holiday Roasted Chestnuts- With Easy to Peel Skins

Serves 2.

I’ve spent a lot of time over the years in New York City since I have family that lives close by. One of the treasures that I remember during the holidays is to buy steaming warm chestnuts from the street vendors on mitten-handed cold afternoons. They were always warm and perfectly cooked and you get a nice brown paper bag filled with steaming sweet holiday treats!

However, over the years I’ve tried to make them at home and follow the instructions by doing the traditional crisscross slice each on of them and roasting them at 425°F. However, they never quite came out as well as the New York City vendors which had more of like a steaming process, so I found the perfect home recipe. The trick is to make one simple slice that breaks through the skin on either side and then boil them first about 10 minutes, this softens the skin that pre-cooks them prior to roasting so you won’t get the fibrous hairy, barky skin sticking to the chestnut.

Ingredients:

  • 1 lb. Chestnuts
  • 4 T. Olive oil and/or Vegan Butter
  • 1/2 t. salt/ to taste

chestnuts-roasted-directions

Directions:

  1. Fill a small sauce pan with water and bring to a boil.
  2. With a small pairing knife, make a diagonal slice through the skin on either side of each chestnut.
  3. Boil the chestnuts covered for about 10 minutes.
  4. Preheat the oven to 400°F.
  5. Drain chestnuts and lay on a cookie sheet and mix in in 3 tablespoons of the olive oil or butter.
  6. Roast in the oven for about 20 minutes the check for done-ness after 15.
  7. The chestnuts should expand and the skin slightly opens.
  8. The chestnuts are ready when you can squeeze the skin and they pop out easily and smoothly and have turned slightly golden yellow color and inside is not too dry, not raw and not too chalky.
  9. Add the final tablespoon of oil or butter in a little bit of salt to taste stir, let cool for 3-5 mins.
  10. Squeeze them on either side of the Chestnut to pop right out- ready to eat, perfectly cooked!

chestnuts-roasted

chestnuts-roasting

chestnuts-roasted

Roasted Chestnuts with Easy to Peel Skins

I've spent a lot of time over the years in New York City since I have family that lives close by. One of the treasures that I remember during the holidays is to buy steaming warm chestnuts from the street vendors on mitten-handed cold afternoons. They were always warm and perfectly cooked and you get a nice brown paper bag filled with steaming sweet holiday treats!

Ingredients
  

Ingredients:

  • 1 lb. Chestnuts
  • 4 T. Olive oil and or Vegan Butter
  • 1/2 t. salt/ to taste

Instructions
 

  • Fill a small sauce pan with water and bring to a boil.
  • With a small pairing knife, make a diagonal slice through the skin on either side of each chestnut.
  • Boil the chestnuts covered for about 10 minutes.
  • Preheat the oven to 400°F.
  • Drain chestnuts and lay on a cookie sheet and mix in in 3 tablespoons of the olive oil or butter.
  • Roast in the oven for about 20 minutes the check for done-ness after 15.
  • The chestnuts should expand and the skin slightly opens.
  • The chestnuts are ready when you can squeeze the skin and they pop out easily and smoothly and have turned slightly golden yellow color and inside is not too dry, not raw and not too chalky.
  • Add the final tablespoon of oil or butter in a little bit of salt to taste stir, let cool for 3-5 mins.
  • Squeeze them on either side of the Chestnut to pop right out- ready to eat, perfectly cooked!

Over the years, I’ve consulted and mentored with a few experts in the field of anxiety, alternative medicine and functional medicine. These two doctors that helped when I’ve had questions or intermittent bouts of anxiety and insomnia had positive, encouraging and alternative views about anxiety. They offered treatments that do not involve taking anti-anxiety medicine, antidepressants or any type of allopathic medicine.

As a health and wellness coach, I of course, cannot advise people to either take medicine or not, and please never discontinue your prescribed medicine without a doctor’s careful supervision. My personal choice is to work with the propensity to have anxiety in a holistic, whole-person way, and these are invaluable tools irrespective of your medication usage. Every small change helps; I suggest making just a few incremental changes when we are trying to change a hardwired habit or propensity. This list of 12 steps came as a summary and mind/body suggestions from one of my excellent Mind/Body Medical Doctors here in Boulder Colorado, and I personally have benefited from these suggestions and resources so wanted to share them with you:

sleep-soundly-womens

 

A New Way of Thinking About Anxiety

The Mind/Body doctor wanted to emphasize that anxiety and insomnia is a very common problem, and not a psychiatric disease. Anxiety, as far as he is concerned, is a normal brain responding in a very common way to experiences it has had. He said that it was very important to understand that we are not broken and we do not have a “disorder” that has to be “fixed”. He noted that people who suffer with this, have some brain circuits that developed outside of our conscious awareness, and we can work towards self healing.

He states: “I think we do ourselves a grave disservice when we call anxiety a “disorder”. It is a physiologic condition (not a psychiatric “illness”) characterized by increased adrenaline, cortisol, histamine and other inflammatory chemicals. We may be having these symptoms more frequently than we would like, but this is not a disorder or a disease. Diabetes and appendicitis are disorders/diseases and can be treated medically, but anxiety is a condition that has been shared by almost everyone on the planet, so let’s not call it a disorder. Now that we understand how your own brain (autonomic nervous system) is causing your symptoms, we can take some steps to change the patterns your brain is running.” Bradley D Fanestil, MD.

Suggestions for Education and Treatment

1. Watch this TED Talk by Johann Hari. His book has way more great information and he usually recommends that EVERYONE with anxiety or depression read his book called “Lost Connections”. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MB5IX-np5fE&t=873s From his TED Talk: “If you’re depressed, if you’re anxious, you’re not weak, you’re not crazy, you’re not in the main a machine with broken parts. You’re a human being with unmet needs.”

2. Watch this TEDx Talk by Tim Box about anxiety. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZidGozDhOjg

3. Or this TED Talk by Kelly McGonagle about stress. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RcGyVTAoXEU&t=360s

4. Consider reading “Hope and Help for Your Nerves” by Claire Weekes MD

5. Read this blog by David Hanscom MD (author of “Back in Control: a surgeon’s roadmap out of chronic pain“. Also, internet and podcasts.

*If we have issues with anger (not everyone does), here is a podcast where David Hanscom is interviewed about anxiety and anger: https://vidalspeaks.com/podcasts/emotional-healing/dr-david-hanscom-anger-and-forgiveness-episode-84/

6. We might talk more about the power of mindfulness and meditation in the future. There is a LOT of scientific evidence that brain chemistry, brain circuitry and even brain VOLUME changes with mindfulness practices.

Active Mini-Meditation

For now, he recommended that we start doing an “active mini-meditation” – for just 3 seconds – multiple times per day:

A. Drop your shoulders.

B. Do a three second “active mini-meditation”, drop your shoulders and then take one slow deep breath in and out through the nose.

C. Repeat throughout he day, when needed.

7. If we have been told we have ADD or ADHD, consider reading  Scattered Minds by Gabor Mate.

8. Watch this 4 minute Gabor Mate video clip:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=l3bynimi8HQ

9. Watch this TED Talk by Phil Borges, director of the movie “Crazywise”-
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9_KSYu1Tqx8

10. Try expressive writing – ok to not continue with it if we do not perceive any benefit, but just try it for 2-3 days and see if we notice any less tension in your system or any other benefits. After that, we can decide if it is something we want to continue regularly or not at all or just on certain days.

11. Commit to engaging with the idea that we can take control over our own nervous system.

Mind Body Medicine is a form of Self-Care, and requires for us to do some work.

Our symptoms are in no way our fault. Instead they emanate from neural circuits in the brain that began outside of our conscious awareness. But even so, there are ways to rewire these neural circuits so that we can feel better. Medications and procedures might temporarily blunt symptoms, but only YOU can change the neural pathways that your brain is running, so he insists that we start educating ourselves.

12. Education, education, education. Look at the suggested videos, start reading books. We should learn as much as we can about new neuroscience in order to understand how our subconscious brain (our Autonomic Nervous System) is running alarm signals and to start believing that we can get control over it, and heal completely.

Working with these alternative doctors and both Mind/Body and Functional Medicine, has been invaluable to me over the years as part of my healing process. The doctor that I went to, Bradley D Fanestil, MD. was actually covered by insurance, as a lot of policies are now honoring alternative medicine like chiropractic, acupuncture, preventative medicine, wellness medicine and even Reiki healing. Dr. Fanesil, met with me for almost two hours awhile back and he was so excited about his craft and his understanding of the bio-mechanics of anxiety. He passionately wants to impart to all of us, how these issues are hardwired into our autonomic nervous system and, according to him, are not considered a mental illness. Anxiety and insomnia are natural, common and normal responses to trauma, stress, adrenal fatigue and certain life experiences. With a few small mindfulness techniques, education and self care, over time, he believes that we could heal and restore our systems completely.

 

Photo by Los Muertos Crew from Pexels

East meets west, a modern “Cleansing Panchakarma” detox retreat! Traditional Indian Ayurvedic cleanses offer a holistic approach to taking time off for oneself to detox, cleanse and restore body and mind. John Douillard, a noted Ayurvedic Doctor, says that Panchakarma means literally to “punch your karma,” or make a bold step toward stopping unhealthy patterns in body and mind that would otherwise give way to disease. How can we function well if we are over-stressed and overworked and… overweight? We need regular self care, tune up time.

Create a Sacred Space

Life these days is traumatic, period, and we don’t generally process stress, grief and loss well in our culture. Preferably it’s best to undertake this mini-program on a weekend three day vacation so that you could escape your daily grind. Whether you have family life, or rent a cabin in the forest, try to find a spot where you can observe some silence, at least while the family is away or create a quiet retreat room in your house. I try to do one of these every month. It’s recommended to keep away from excess stimulation, media, cell phones and invest your time resting, walking in nature, reading light material, as well as practicing gentle yoga and meditation.

This mini-retreat can be used for healing and weight loss as well. The Indian curry dhal-bat diet called kitchari that’s traditionally used for three meals however, isn’t great for westerners exclusively, as it consists mostly of mung beans and rice. Those are generally considered high carb, survival foods. In the west, we have a different constitution and time and I found simple, high protein foods that are much more appropriate to add to the cleanse for weight loss. However, you will make a big pot of this kitchari, it is very easy to digest and after day 1 you will notice the digestive cleaning process.

Healing Body, Mind and Heart

I wanted to offer something as simple as possible that could go for all three different doshas or body types. This diet is focusing on Kapha body types, ones with slower metabolism, and with some extra weight. I personally have found that a hybrid of the Indian system and the keto work well for a three day personal retreat and if you like you can extend it to six days or nine days, however long you have. This could be done on a weekend or just taking a few personal days off to be alone in the comfort and quiet to do in your own home. Adjust your own portions, listen and your body will tell you how much or little it needs.

This retreat can release unresolved emotions stored dormant in our mind and heavy connective tissue. To cope, avoid the urge to re-suppress anything and use exercise and meditation to soothe your heart and soul. Walk, laugh, cry, allow whatever needs a voice to be released. My teacher Tsoknyi Rinpoche said “if you let the mind come out, it will.” Be gentle with yourself and your experience, joys comes often after the purging of tears and fears, likewise health comes after the purging of toxins.

Simplifying your diet allows your body to divert it’s energies to mobilizing and releasing accumulated toxins. According to Ayurveda, a few foods are easier to digest than others and therefore are preferred whenever you undertake a detoxification. Here is my hybrid, holistic “recipe” for Panchakarma:

Before you begin:

  • Schedule specific dates for when and how long the cleanse will be, like a Friday am until Sunday pm.
  • Prepare to eat a simple nutritive breakfast and two meals of cleansing Kitchari only.
  • Remove excess caffeine (morning ok), all tobacco, alcohol, or other substances from the daily regimen.
  • Drink a detoxifying herbal tea throughout this time and 8-10 glasses of water.
  • Evening Oil Massage and warm lymphatic massage brush bath every day during the cleanse.
  • Quiet, alone time for yourself during the cleanse.
  • At least 12 minutes each, of yoga, meditation and cardio every day.

Morning Panchakarma

1. 12 minutes of Yoga, sun salutations, outside is best, do whatever flow you are used to.

2. Keto creamer organic coffee or Kapha keto creamer chai tea with ginger and cinnamon, and a pinch of clove.
For the keto creamer, I add 1 tbs grass-fed whey power, stirred together with almond milk add stevia if needed.

3. 1/2c organic yogurt and 1/2 c raspberry, blackberries, and blueberries, or apples and pears
or 1/2c organic cottage cheese and 1/2c sliced red peppers and cucumbers (if dairy free, soy yogurt can be substituted)

4. Morning after breakfast meditation for at least 12 minutes, you can recite a calming mantra or affirmation.

5. Mid Morning, drink a quick shot of 2 teaspoons of organic apple cider vinegar

kitchari-102882436_horiz-1040x430-1

Courtesy of: https://www.marthastewart.com/1165773/kitchari

Afternoon Panchakarma

Since your digestion is strongest when the sun is brightest, it’s best to eat your biggest meal at noon, also have a little lighter dinner.

 

Recipe for Kitchari

Ingredients:

2 cups uncooked split red lentils
1 cup uncooked organic white basmati rice (rinse with water until water runs clear)
1 tablespoon of ghee (can substitute olive oil)

I used 4 tbs of quality bulk curry powder or you can use:
[2 tbs turmeric and 1 tbs fresh grated ginger root or 1 teaspoon ginger
2 bay leaves
1 teaspoon per black mustard seeds, cumin, and garlic powder
Optional: ½ teaspoon each coriander powder, fennel, and fenugreek seeds]

6 cups water
½ teaspoon salt (rock salt or sour pink salt is best)
Sliced carrots, and or chopped spinach, chard, or beet greens
Pan fried, cubed tofu.

Instructions:

Rinse the mung beans till the water runs clear. I soak mine overnight or a for a few hours before cooking. Bring beans to a boil 6 water cups
Cook beans and rice together until until become soft (about 30 to forty minutes).
The the beans and rice are cooked, I heat up 2T ghee or olive oil in a fry pan and cook the spices lightly, and then add them to beans and rice.
Add vegetables and tofu, cilantro leaves as a garnish just before serving, if desired. Add salt to taste.

1. 2 c. kitchari with vegetables and tofu.

2. Lemon or mint water room temp or warm, 8-10 glasses per day, ginger or mint tea or tea and dairy free chai can be alternated.

3. Cardio walk or workout interval is best for at least 12 minutes.

4. Listen to healing music, read, light spiritual or poetic reading, long walks outside, 5 element nature bathing.

Early Evening Panchakarma

1. Eat 2 cups of ready made kitchari.

2. Add 2 teaspoons of oil- flax, ghee, olive or coconut.

3. Early evening sunset walk, celebrate each night and try to see the magical sunset to seal the day.

4. Massage your body for 15 to 20 minutes with 8 oz of lightly pan warmed organic sesame or coconut oil, from head to toe, hair too! The coconut I warm in my hands.

5. I then do my evening meditation for 12 minutes with a towel under me, to let my skin absorb the oil, then take a shower or bath. Scrub your body with natural or Dr. Bronner’s soap and use a dry brush over whole body toward your heart as this provides a lymphatic massage, but let some oil to stay on the skin before bed. You can do the oil and bath in the afternoon instead as well.

6. Get at least 7-8 hours of good, nourishing, self care sleep.

 

Basic Retreat Shopping List:

✓Dry Wooden Brush

✓ 2 Jars Raw, unfiltered organic Coconut Oil

✓1 lb. Basmati Rice

✓1 lb. Red Lentils

✓Bunch fresh spinach, carrots

✓1 block organic Tofu

✓Large bag of bulk Curry Powder

✓1 large container of Organic Yogurt

✓Berries, Pears and or/ Apples

✓1 small carton almond milk or sugar free soy creamer

✓Grass fed whey powder

✓Mint or ginger tea

✓Fresh lemons or lemon juice bottle

✓Coffee or black tea (mornings only, as desired with almond milk)

Download Recipe Here

Check with your doctor before beginning any diet, exercise or weight loss plan, and not recommended if pregnant or lactating. This diet is not intended to diagnose, cure any disease, this is what I personally have found, heals me… Try it if it’s safe for you, and please let us know how it worked for you!

Here’s to your new, yogic and healed self!
Dawn Boiani
Owner

Originally Published on: Jun 24, 2019 on Sakura Designs

I am grateful to live part time in southern Colorado in a small, remote spiritual community in the Sangre De Criso Mountains called Crestone. We have a lot of varying spiritual centers here, about 34, and a number of them are Tibetan Buddhist. For many years my Bhutanese friend Tsering and his family ran a local restaurant called the Desert Sage that sadly just closed this month. We will miss the restaurant and his family but in celebration of the many treasured years, I tried to make our very favorite stir fry dish at home- a vegan version of Tibetan Shapta. Ours came out well using vegan Be’f tips, but it is… spicy and warms you from the inside!

Vegan Tibetan Shapta Recipe

Shabda or Shapta is a traditional Tibetan dish of stir-fried meat and vegetables with a little bit of chili and herbs.

tibetan-shapta

Ingredients:

• 1 tsp. powered ginger or 1 T. fresh chopped
• 4 garlic cloves, peeled and chopped
• 6 chopped crimini mushrooms
• 1 tomato chopped
• 8 T. organic tomato sauce
• 1 sliced organic zucchini
• 1 small head of broccoli florets, separated
• 1 organic red pepper chopped
• 9 oz. vegan be’f tips sliced
• 4 T. soy sauce
• 1 large organic onion chopped
• 1 tsp. garam masala (optional), 1/2 cup peanuts(optional), 1 tsp. honey to taste (optional)
• 6 dried red chilies cut in half
• 6 T. olive oil
• 1 cup vegetable stock, from vegetable bullion is fine
• 1/2 cup chopped green onions
• 1 cup cooked basmati rice, with salt, olive oil and vegan butter to taste

Instructions:

1. Slice the be’f and marinate in a bowl with soy sauce and ginger.
2. Make rice, and season with salt, olive oil and vegan butter to taste.
3. Heat 4T. of the olive oil on med. high heat, and saute garlic, ginger and onions in a large skillet or wok.
4. Add hot peppers, tomato sauce and spices.
5. Add a bit more oil and lightly fry vegan beef tips with soy on the other side of the skillet then add broccoli, cook on low.
6. In a separate frying pan add oil and pan fry the mushrooms and zucchini.
7. Add all items to main skillet, add vegetable stock.
8. Place a lid on the skillet, stir and simmer on medium heat.
9. When ready to serve, mix in green onions and use some on the top for garnish.
10. Serve with warm basmati rice!

Serves 4.

 

tibetan-stir-frys

tibetan-shap-ta

Vegan Be’f Tips

 

tibetan-stir-fry

 

tibetan-stir-fry

Vegan Tibetan Shapta Recipe

Shabda or Shapta is a traditional Tibetan dish of stir-fried meat and vegetables with a little bit of chili and herbs.

Ingredients
  

  • 1 tsp. powered ginger or 1 T. fresh chopped
  • 4 garlic cloves peeled and chopped
  • 6 chopped crimini mushrooms
  • 1 tomato chopped
  • 8 T. organic tomato sauce
  • 1 sliced organic zucchini
  • 1 small head of broccoli florets separated
  • 1 organic red pepper chopped
  • 9 oz. vegan be'f tips sliced
  • 4 T. soy sauce
  • 1 large organic onion chopped
  • 1 tsp. garam masala optional, 1/2 cup peanuts(optional), 1 tsp. honey to taste (optional)
  • 6 dried red chilies cut in half
  • 6 T. olive oil
  • 1 cup vegetable stock from vegetable bullion is fine
  • 1/2 cup chopped green onions
  • 1 cup cooked basmati rice with salt, olive oil and vegan butter to taste

Instructions
 

  • Slice the be'f and marinate in a bowl with soy sauce and ginger.
  • Make rice, and season with salt olive oil and vegan butter to taste.
  • Heat 4T. of the olive oil, and saute garlic, ginger and onions in a large skillet or wok.
  • Add hot pepper, tomato sauce and spices.
  • Add a bit more oil and lightly fried vegan beef tips on the other side of the skillet then add broccoli.
  • In a separate frying pan add oil and pan fry the mushrooms and zucchini.
  • Add all items to main skillet, add vegetable stock.
  • Place a lid on the skillet, stir and simmer on medium heat.
  • When ready to serve, mix in green onions and use some on the top for garnish.
  • Serve with warm basmati rice!

chai pumpkin bread

Chai Spiced Pumpkin Bread- Gluten, Dairy and Sugar Free

Honestly, this fall pumpkin bread recipe is incredibly satisfying even without there being any wheat flour, dairy or sugar. It’s perfectly sweet and moist and your whole kitchen fills up with the warmth of harvest baking. My daughter who is a precocious teen, doesn’t really like much of what I cook because it’s generally on the “healthy” side- says “mom your bread slaps.” I suspect that means said she liked it because she asked for a few pieces. Have this warm bread standalone or with some vegan butter slathered on it.

Ingredients:

1 stick vegan butter, softened
1 T. coconut oil
1 cup Truvia/ Stevia, Xylitol or Monkfruit equivalent
2 organic eggs
1 (15-ounce) can organic pumpkin puree
2 cups gluten-free rice based flour (not almond flour exclusively)
1 1/2 tsp. pumpkin pie spice
1/2 tsp. cardamom and more to top
1/2 tsp. cinnamon
2 tsp vanilla extract
1 1/2 tsp. baking powder
1/2 tsp. baking soda
1/2 tsp. salt
1 T. raw honey and 1 tsp.coconut oil to baste on top when finished

Instructions:

Preheat the oven to 325°F.
Cream the vegan butter, coconut oil and sugar substitute together.
Crack eggs and add to pumpkin and vanilla and hand beat, about 20 strokes.
In another bowl, mix dry ingredients: flour, spice blend, baking powder, baking soda and salt.
Add the dry ingredients to the creamed ones and blend.
Well grease a 9×5-inch bread pan. Pour in the batter, it should look similar to peanut butter in texture, thick.
Bake for about 1 hour and 1/2 at high altitude.
Glaze with 1 T. honey and coconut oil and cardamom while still warm.
Let cool before serving.

IMG 5618

Chai Spiced Pumpkin Bread- Gluten, Dairy and Sugar Free

Honestly, this fall pumpkin bread recipe is incredibly satisfying even without there being any wheat flour dairy or sugar. It's perfectly sweet and moist and your whole kitchen fills up with the warmth of harvest baking. My daughter who is a precocious teen, doesn't really like much of what I cook because it's generally on the "healthy" side- says "mom your bread slaps." I suspect that means said she liked it because she asked for a few pieces. Have this bread standalone or with some vegan butter slathered on it.

Ingredients
  

  • 1 stick vegan butter softened
  • 1 T. coconut oil
  • 1 cup Truvia/ Stevia or Xylitol or Monkfruit equivalent
  • 2 organic eggs
  • 1 15-ounce can organic pumpkin puree
  • 2 cups gluten-free rice based flour not almond flour exclusively
  • 1 1/2 tsp pumpkin pie spice
  • 1/2 tsp. cardamom and more to top
  • 1/2 tsp. cinnamon
  • 2 tsp vanilla extract
  • 1 1/2 tsp baking powder
  • 1/2 tsp. baking soda
  • 1/2 tsp. salt
  • 1 T. raw honey and 1 tsp.coconut oil to baste on top when finished

Instructions
 

  • Preheat the oven to 325°F.
  • Cream the vegan butter, coconut oil and sugar substitute together.
  • Crack eggs and add to pumpkin and vanilla and hand beat, about 20 strokes.
  • In another bowl, mix dry ingredients: flour, spice blend, baking powder, baking soda and salt.
  • Add the dry ingredients to the creamed ones and blend.
  • Well grease a 9×5-inch bread pan. Pour in the batter, it should look similar to peanut butter in texture, thick.
  • Bake for about 1 hour and 1/2 at high altitude.
  • Glaze with 1 T. honey and coconut oil and cardamom while still warm.
  • Let cool before serving.

pumpkin seed smoothie

I have a new, healthy and nutrient-dense addiction. I must confess that I regularly indulge in this newfound recipe that happens to be in celebration of our October harvest month where we have pumpkins and pumpkin seeds galore! It is a cardamom, pumpkin seed milk that uses no sugar; all of the sweetness is plentifully supplied by the natural sugars from pitted dates. This makes about 4 to 5 servings and I keep the remainder covered in the blender pitcher and then give it a quick blend right before I drink it as the pumpkin seeds can settle a bit as they tend to be heavier and separate. One glass of this is a meal in itself and pumpkin seeds have a mind boggling amount of health benefits to your heart, digestion, they help as an anti-parasitic and for cancer prevention. They are loaded with with Omega 6 oils- this chai-spicy smoothie is so amazing that I’m sure that you too will become a pumpkin cardamom milk addict! Cheers and warmest fall wishes to everyone!

Ingredients:

5 Cups of Fresh Water

1 Cup Dry, Unsalted Pumpkin Seeds

6 Pitted Dates

1 tsp. Cardamom Powder

Directions:

Place all ingredients into a high powered blender and blend until smooth.

 

Repost from https://www.healthline.com/nutrition/11-benefits-of-pumpkin-seeds#TOC_TITLE_HDR_8.


The Health Benefits of Pumpkin Seeds

Pumpkin seeds are one of the most commonly consumed types of seeds, and are good sources of phosphorus, monounsaturated fats and omega-6 fats.

A 1-ounce (28-gram) serving of pumpkin seeds contains (37):

  • Calories: 151
  • Fiber: 1.7 grams
  • Protein: 7 grams
  • Monounsaturated fat: 4 grams
  • Omega-6 fats: 6 grams
  • Manganese: 42% of the RDI
  • Magnesium: 37% of the RDI
  • Phosphorus: 33% of the RDI

Pumpkin seeds are also good sources of phytosterols, which are plant compounds that may help lower blood cholesterol (38Trusted Source).

These seeds have been reported to have a number of health benefits, likely due to their wide range of nutrients.

One observational study of more than 8,000 people found that those who had a higher intake of pumpkin and sunflower seeds had a significantly reduced risk of breast cancer (39Trusted Source).

Another study in children found that pumpkin seeds may help lower the risk of bladder stones by reducing the amount of calcium in urine (40Trusted Source).

Bladder stones are similar to kidney stones. They’re formed when certain minerals crystalize inside the bladder, which leads to abdominal discomfort.

A couple of studies have shown that pumpkin seed oil can improve symptoms of prostate and urinary disorders (41Trusted Source, 42Trusted Source).

These studies also showed that pumpkin seed oil may reduce symptoms of overactive bladder and improve quality of life for men with enlarged prostates.

A study of postmenopausal women also found that pumpkin seed oil may help reduce blood pressure, increase “good” HDL cholesterol and improve menopause symptoms (43Trusted Source).

Summary: Pumpkin seeds and pumpkin seed oil are good sources of monounsaturated and omega-6 fats, and may help improve heart health and symptoms of urinary disorders.

nutrivive pumpkin milk

IMG 4949

Pumpkin Seed Cardamom Milk

I have a new healthy and nutrient-dense addiction. I must confess that I regularly indulge in this newfound recipe that happens to be in celebration of our harvest month where we have pumpkins and pumpkin seeds galore! It is a cardamom, pumpkin seed milk that uses no sugar, all of the sweetness is plentifully supplied by the natural sugars from pitted dates. This makes about 4 to 5 servings and I keep the remainder covered in the blender pitcher and then give it a quick blend right before I drink it as the pumpkin seeds can settle a bit as they tend to be heavier and separate. One glass of this is a meal in itself and pumpkin seeds have a mind boggling amount of health benefits to your heart, digestion, they help as an anti-parasitic and for cancer prevention. They are loaded with with Omega 6 oils- this chai-spicy smoothie is so amazing that I'm sure that you too will become a pumpkin cardamom milk addict! Cheers and warmest fall wishes to everyone!

Ingredients
  

  • 5 Cups of Fresh Water
  • 1 Cup Dry Unsalted Pumpkin Seeds
  • 6 Pitted Dates
  • 1 tsp. Cardamom Powder

Instructions
 

  • Place all ingredients into a high powered blender and blend until smooth.

Notes

This makes about 4 to 5 servings and I keep the remainder covered in the blender pitcher and then give it a quick blend right before I drink it as the pumpkin seeds can settle a bit as they tend to be heavier and separate.

 

Enliven and preserve your eternal inner goddess! I lived for quite a few years over in Nepal and India, and the women of all ages there have long, dark, gorgeous, healthy hair. They didn’t use hair dyes as much as they like to use natural plant based henna- the stuff of belly dancers and burgeoning goddesses!

I found one that’s already ready to go from the company called Lush which makes natural, mostly packaging free cosmetics that I adore and often try to reproduce at home. Here they sell a ready-made block of nutritive henna with cocoa butter and coffee. This does not chemically damage your hair. Henna can be a bit drying, and it’s a long-lasting color deposit. It can not lift your existing color, but pretty good for tinting any stray, pesky greys (not that any of my readers or I have any greys of course!)

lush henna

It is pretty simple to use. Each block offers 6 coloring squares, use 1 for each coloring.

Tools:

You will need a bowl, spoon, boiling water, gloves and a plastic head wrap.

Directions:

Use a knife and cut one square.

Boil about 1 cup of water and place henna brick in a bowl.

I add 1 T of hair oil to add more moisture.

Cover the henna with hot water and stir with a spoon until it forms a thick cake like batter. Let cool.

Then, with a gloved hand spread henna onto hair, henna is great for root touchups!

Next, place a cap on and leave henna for two hours.

Then rinse all henna out with gloved hand in warm water.

Use a light sulfate free shampoo and then condition. Rinse. Style as usual.

 

 

Every week I use color depositing conditioners to keep hair toned and… lush!

Remember: Do not use home or salon color over hair that has been hennaed, as there can be damage.

For more info: https://www.lushusa.com/stories/article_how-to-use-henna-hair-dye.html

angles on bare skin

The natural almond and lavender soap-free facial cleanser is one of the best selling products at Lush. It can be quite costly though, it’s about $16 for a small 3.5oz. jar and you can easily make a similar replica at home yourself for a fraction of the cost. Once you have the ingredients you can make it again and again with the same supplies and I don’t recommend doubling the ingredients because this makes enough for about one to three months.

It’s an all natural almond based gentle exfoliant cleanser, that has clay, vegetable glycerin and essential oils. You can also use it as a detoxifying mask and leave it on to pull out toxins for about 10 minutes and let it dry then wash office you would any other clay mask. The way that this is mostly used is that you take a small pea sized amount your hands and add some warm water and press into your palm to form an almond milk-like cleanser, that can be used every day, it’s like an edible almond treat for your skin!

https://www.instagram.com/p/CTsm4P5vw05/

How to Make One Month’s Supply

This replica recipe my approximation and very similar to Angels on Bare Skin™
Natural Almond Facial Cleanser Recipe

lush cleanser

Ingredients:

1/4 cup of ground raw, Organic Almonds, ground semi fine, retaining some texture

3 T. of Bentonite or Kaolin Clay

1 T. Vegetable Glycerin

1 T. Honey

1 tsp. Apple Cider Vinegar

1/4 tsp. Rose Water

1T. Lavender Flowers or Purple Russian Sage Flowers Dried

6 drops of Lavender Essential Oil

6 drops of Rose Essential Oil

2 T. water (+/-)

Directions:

Place all ingredients except water in a bowl and mix well.

Add water and mix with a spoon into a thick, dry paste.

Roll into a ball, and form a tube shape.

Roll formed tube into dried flowers.

Store in an airtight covered container, to prevent mold, or refrigerate if you live in a warmer climate.

Use a pea sized amount with water to clean face, daily, rinse.

 

angels on bare skin diy

Lush's Angels on Bare Skin Replica DIY Natural Almond Facial Cleanser Recipe

The natural almond and lavender soap-free facial cleanser is one of the best selling products at Lush. It can be quite costly though it's about $16 for a small jar and you can easily make a similar replica at home yourself for a fraction of the cost. Once you have the ingredients you can make it again and again with the same supplies and I don't recommend doubling the ingredients because this makes enough for about one to three months.It's an all natural almond based gentle exfoliant cleanser, that has clay, vegetable glycerin and essential oils. You can also use it as a detoxifying mask and leave it on to pull out toxins for about 10 minutes and let it dry then wash off as you would any other clay mask. The way that this is mostly used is that you take a small pea sized amount your hands and add some warm water and press into your palm to form an almond milk-like cleanser, that can be used every day, it's like an edible almond treat for your skin!

Ingredients
  

  • 1/4 cup of ground raw Organic Almonds, ground semi fine, retaining some texture
  • 3 T. of Bentonite or Kaolin Clay
  • 1 T. Vegetable Glycerin
  • 1/4 tsp. Rose Water
  • 1 T. Lavender Flowers or Purple Russian Sage Flowers Dried
  • 1 T. honey
  • 6 drops of Lavender Essential Oil
  • 6 drops of Rose Essential Oil
  • 2 T. water +/-

Instructions
 

  • Place all ingredients except water in a bowl and mix well.
  • Add water and mix with a spoon into a thick, dry paste.
  • Roll into a ball, and form a tube shape.
  • Roll formed tube into dried flowers.
  • Store in a covered container.
  • Use a pea sized amount with water to clean face, daily, rinse.

Tsoknyi Rinpoche

“Advice on the Path”

Teachings given at Swyambunath, Katmandu, May 2006 This is an advanced teaching for tantric practitioners, but may benefit anyone who experiences stress, anxiety or insomnia. Permission to repost on FemTechOnline.com given by Rinpoche on Sept. 3, 2021 May it be of benefit.

Day 1

Good morning, I would like to begin the teaching with a short meditation. Then you can ask some questions. But first, please bring your “lung” down, below the navel.

I have been teaching Westerners for about 15 years. In the beginning I didn’t realize that Westerners have so much “lung”. “Lung” and clarity are connected, the clarity-mind. Tibetans in the east don’t have so much clarity; so that doesn’t bring up so much “lung”. “Lung” means speed, wind, restless energy in your body. Between the gross body and the mental, there is the subtle body. It is connected with “tsa”, “lung”, and “tigle”. The lung’s main place is below the navel. But because of lifestyle circumstances, subject and object, with the fear and wanting to accomplish so much within a short time, all your attention goes out through the five senses, just flies outside and lands on the five objects and then there is glue there, strong glue. You glue onto the objects and then there is a mixture of glue with hope and fear. And that comes back to you as lung. Then you have this buzzzzzzzzz.

When you stay in New York City, there is buzzzz, speed-buzz. Although you think “I have no job, but I have plenty of money, my relationship is good”, but New York City’s blessing is buzzzzz, you feel you must do something! That is also connected with the fear. So we have this I think. I call it “fear of existence”. And that creates some kind of speed, restlessness and then worse, it becomes anxiety. I think that is the major disease in this speedy world, and it needs to be brought down. If you don’t bring it down – even if you practice meditation, then it becomes like the car-engine, without going. Just wheeee ! You are not going anywhere! So you sit there with this speed and you chant mantras, and it becomes worse. You try to meditate, but it becomes worse…I think the mind, needs to connect with the body, the subtle body. And then find this lung and breath it down. There is traditionally a technique called jamlung that might help. If not, just mentally find that restless energy in your body. Not in the mind. Of course the mind and the body are connected but sometimes the lung is not connected with the mind. It just becomes a physical buzz. And that is also sometimes connected with tightness. So find that and bring it down.

This is becoming your weak point and ego tries to own that. So ego, the speed, the fear, all becomes one lump. And then it becomes very tight, tight inside. And it becomes your life-program. You always live with that, no matter what you are doing. Even when you are talking, listening, reading, even when you are in an airplane, there is some tightness there. That tightness is actually connected with the wind.

We have five different winds. One is called upper-going wind and that wind is supposed to stay below the navel. So it goes up and connects with the nerves and then becomes locked up. Then it gives you muscle-problems and creates a lot of emotions at the wrong time, in the wrong place. When this wind goes up, it becomes very emotional. It’s like a bottle of mineral water – half is water, half is air. So your head is like half is the brain and half is like open air. Your head feels so big… That is wind, which went up in the head. And then the face becomes red, eyes becomes burning, then agitation. All this is the subtle body’s problem. Of course it is created by the mind. But once it becomes physical, although mentally you think, “Oh, no problem, I am fine”, this problem remains in your subtle body. So basically you need to bring it down.

On Loving Kindness

Loving kindness, compassion, devotion and feelings are very good for bringing this lung down. If you do it authentically, it gives another kind of buzz – devotion-buzz: “Om mani peme hung, om mani peme hung”… It’s like listening to good music. So this blessing settles the lung down. Clarity will not necessarily bring the lung down. But if you do very good rigpa or Mahamudra-practice, free from any clinging, then there is nothing that can get hooked. So the stress or restless lung just drops. But sometimes there is an undercurrent of some ego-clinging. Although you think your clarity is up here, deep down you are still holding something on the view. So there is one thread, subtle thread…

When lung is up here, then your lifestyle is like that of a teenager:” What to do – new boyfriend – new girlfriend?”…. So hope and fear brings lung up all the time. Then when you sleep, it goes down. In the morning when you wake up – zoom – up again! Because the lung already knows how to go up. You already made a habitual pattern in your physical system. As soon as you grasp, this lung comes up. I have had this experience because I did one project and then this lung came up. I worked 15 years with Drukpa Kagyu-book project. So that was very tough. But then I developed a method to bring the lung down.

Bringing the Lung Down

There is no way without going through the mind. Mindfulness on the mind and then sort of scanning to find this speedy lung and then mind, speedy lung, again connect. My example is: if you have children and if the children stay in the childrens’ room, then there is no problem. But if the children come into the shrine-room, then there is a problem. Is it the children-problem or the location-problem? It is the location-problem, not the children problem. So lung actually is no problem, we need that lung. But if it goes in the wrong location, then it makes problem.

The best way to bring down lung is rigpa, but rigpa is sometimes too open, too much clarity, it’s easy to be distracted. So you need some focus, subtle focus. So mind, mindfulness connected with the mind and mind slowly scans down the lung, with the help of external breathing. There is a technique where you can hold your restless lung down and then also smile. If you can do that, then it’s very good. I think H.H. Dalai Lama is always smiling, but I don’t see any lung in his face. He is a always clear, not cloudy, not burned, red, watery eye. His eyes are always bright. Very engaging but I think he knows how to bring his lung down. Some lamas because of their lifestyle, like H.H. Khentse Rinpoche always sat like a mountain. So his lung was like a solid rock and then he engaged within that. H.H. Dalai Lama – always engaging – that kind of style is easy to bring lung up. But being motionless like Nyoshul Khen or Khentse Rinpoche, that doesn’t create so much lung. But our modern lifestyle creates too much lung. So bring it down.

When you have too much lung, you have almost two personalities. It is like a big screen CNN showing something and then below there is a message-wave. But it doesn’t connect. One is talking about Mr. Bush, an other is taking about the Share Market in Taiwan. So you have this double personality. When you have lung and you are engaging with something, the subtle, undercurrent is talking about something different. Then you are really tight. That’s a sign of lung or non-focus. So fully synchronize, focus on your body, bring lung down and then rest in Shamata without support, Mahamudra, Dzogchen or do visualization. Then everything becomes very good, because of clarity, there is full potential. Otherwise it brings up a lot of cloudiness and extra emotions. The whole point is you need to have guts. I think a lot of people have no guts. They become hollow, easy to scare, almost like panic will come. So when there are no guts, you become very emotional, very cloudy. This is the problem. So bring lung down. Make very solid guts here and then this becomes clear, and the emotions are not upside-down. The mind is pure clarity. Based on that structure you have to practice Buddhism. It is not even Buddhism yet; just the foundation.

When you bring lung down, you should not feel dull. If there is dullness, that means your lung and also your mental cognition is down here. Then it becomes stupid meditation. So be sure…Between the Dzogchen and Vipassana we have this problem. Dzogchen is trying to be very clear, clarity went down here and this becomes numb. Vipassana tries to work here but in the end mind and mental cognition also gets absorbed into this stillness. So there is a middle way. Just keep your body completely relaxed. Rest lung in its own place and keep mind totally free from any concepts, any method or technique. Just freely rest, then lung doesn’t come after the clarity. When the mind is active, normally the lung also becomes active, like tail. So we don’t need the lung: “You stay here, this is your place (below the navel)”. So you keep it there. Then the active clarity, openness will be very, very useful I think.

Clever People

A lot of people who have lung, are usually clever people. They are very active. So because of their active clarity, their emotional life becomes upside down. Anytime I give Dzogchen or nature of mind-teaching, in the retreat they practice very well. Then when they are out of the retreat, of course they have lung-problem. Then they take all the other methods trying to bring the lung down. They try to do yoga, they do Vipassana, and they do breathing and all kinds of scanning. So during the whole year they try to focus on their physical comfort. But you can maintain physical comfort mainly by bringing the lung down. With this scanning, with this gentle vase breathing, if you do it well, it will stay. It can save a lot of time. And when you hold that, even when you go to the office, you will not suffer from restlessness. Otherwise if you stay in three-year-retreat and then you come out – a bit crazy, because the lung went up. So the challenge is that the raw material of lung sits here, below the navel and the heart is open. Mind, nature of mind, the cognition becomes clear. Then I think it can make a very good basic practitioner.

So now ask questions: what is the most difficult area in your life, or the most difficult when you practice meditation. (Three western monks arrive to the teaching) Oh, three “Nepalese” came! One hour late! So these three monks do not have any lung-problems..! So can we discuss what is the most problematic area in your general life? Maybe there is some advice from the Buddhist path. Or when you come onto the meditation path, maybe you have some difficulties. Or when coming to the Vajrayana, or to Mahamudra or, Dzogchen. So what is the most difficult practice of your life? Based on that then we can discuss. Otherwise you have heard thousands of teachings already, so it becomes just another technique.

STUDENT: Rinpoche, in dealing with the emotions I have heard for so many years that the different yanas have different approaches. And in the Vajrayana it always says we take the emotions as the path. In Jamgong Kongtul’s “Creation and Completion” text he mentions that when we have a particular emotion, we should visualize ourselves in the form of the deity. But honestly I don’t know how to apply that or the whole idea of taking the emotions as the path…

RINPOCHE: I think you have to have a certain attitude first. An attitude towards the emotions. Not as an enemy, not as abandoning them. And then sort of bring it in. But there is a trick. Don’t truly follow them but bring them in. It is a little bit like the Aikido method – you go with it and then kick it out. At the end you have to kick out the emotion but not bang it. So first you welcome the emotion and then it becomes part of you and it becomes a little bit relaxed. Then you apply the method so it is taken as the path. The emotion and you are going in the same direction at first. Then slowly you say bye, bye.

Within the emotions there are five poisons. Within the five poisons, there is one predominant element – the ego. You have to abandon that, no matter what. Remove ego and the five poisons become transformed. I think that is the best way. When you are joining with the emotion, it really transforms the ego, and it freaks out. Ego is very happy when you are challenging it, because ego then becomes important, and is holding onto the method, – object and method – so ego becomes very spiritual, very holy. But underneath is the same root, same wire…

When the emotion comes, we are sort of cheating the ego: “Ok, I am also emotion, I don’t mind, emotion is good, actually I follow it”. So the ego freaks out, and doesn’t know what to do. And from there you go out through the nature of mind. First welcome, transform a little bit and then look in. When the ego doesn’t know what to do, recognize rigpa. Then rest. To recognize rigpa at the beginning is sometimes difficult.

STUDENT: is it better to live with the emotions for a while rather than acting upon them?

RINPOCHE: Emotions come from your investment, from the alaya, habitual pattern stored in the alaya. Sometimes emotions are not created, but you just sit there and from your alaya – pop- it comes out. We need to know how to deal with that also. A lot of emotions come when you practice preliminary practice, ngondro. Some can cope with it, some cannot take it. So it is very challenging through that time. But when any obstacle comes, any emotion comes, this method is the best, to at first welcome it. Do not confront, just welcome. But don’t stay too long. Then you become part of the emotion. You understand more or less..? Technically you understood, but whether you can do it or not, that depends on your skill of practice.

STUDENT: Is the emotion always based on a thought?

RINPOCHE: Some emotions, particularly pure emotions are not necessarily created by the mind, but when the emotion comes, it informs the mind. Then you know it is emotion. But it comes sometimes not necessarily through the mind. Some emotions are already in your physical system, so when the physical system “clicks”, it comes up.

STUDENT: Like fear, when you walk and suddenly you trip up….

RINPOCHE: That fear we need, Buddhism also says. It’s called healthy fear. Until you become a rainbow body you need that fear. That fear is part of our relative truth wisdom. If you sit there and a tiger comes, then do something with your clarity. Run is better? Pretending you are dead is better? Or make funny noise is better? You have to do something to protect your physical body. If when a tiger comes, you can do like this “Oh, transparent, it doesn’t obstruct”, then it is ok. The tiger will not eat you because you’re a rainbow body. Until then, we need this fear. But what I am talking about is this buzz-fear. That fear is very unhealthy.

STUDENT: When fear comes you feel it from the soles of your feet to the crown of your head. You feel this kind of adrenaline rush. But I find with some emotions like anger, it is more than something I can intellectually talk myself out of, because it takes hold in the body. Your face becomes red or you feel some tightness. Then I try to think how to deal with that. It’s almost more overwhelming than any kind of intellectual fear…

RINPOCHE: This kind of anger has two systems, you have to deal with both the emotional system and the mental understanding. You have to “click” both otherwise it will not go. You have to do something with your physical body, like therapy, not Buddhist therapy. And then the mental understanding: “Oh, why is this anger?”  So you have to enlighten this understanding and still stay in your physical body. Then you do some mantras, some visualizations, and some transformation practice. Understanding practice and feeling practice need to go together, like loving-kindness, compassion, devotion. There is a feeling in your physical subtle body and there is one with no feeling. Just understanding, just clarity. You need both in order to work with the emotions.

STUDENT: It seems that you can let go of the object and mentally try to reach a state of loving-kindness or tranquility. But at least in my own experience, the body seems to take longer time to settle back.

RINPOCHE: That’s ok. As long as you stay in the mind, the ego grasping is gone. The feeling will not give you any karmic pattern. But it becomes uncomfortable for you. But it is not a sin. Sin, “dikpa” is created in the mind. So when your mental grasping on the anger is gone, that is not really “dikpa”, but it is distracting for your physical body if you don’t take care properly.

STUDENT: How do you separate your personality from the ego?

RINPOCHE: Buddhism talks about two things: cause and condition. Some personality comes from your past life package. Some personality comes from the environment where you live, how you are brought up. As long as you have the five skandhas, ego is in charge. But actually it is not really there.  So I think the best way of understanding of the five skandhas, is by an understanding of impermanence, understanding of non-solidity. So when you sit down and look: “Oh, this is the five skandhas, this is thought, this is emotion, this is I and this is my personality”, then you can see that there is a space in between, where you can find openness, insight. Otherwise everything is me, ego, my problem, my personality – we call it me, but actually it is not really me, me like holding all these things. (Rinpoche clutches a lot of different items). “This is me, my personality”. But then you start to see: “Oh, this is the air-condition controller, this is Rinpoche’s blessings, this is a statue”…Then slowly, there is no me. The grasping is a little bit loose and within that you see space, then you just rest. But still there is knowing, cognizance and you know that all these are connected. So the ultimate wisdom knows the relative phenomena. Ultimate wisdom, egolessness knows…In the Mahamudra we call it “rochig toma” – one taste, many. And “toma-rochig”- from the many, one taste. “rochig toma, toma rochig”.

So it is very important to balance the relative and the ultimate understanding. It is not like a black and white understanding. I know in the West you like to put everything in black and white, systematically. It works very well when running a country, but sometimes it does not work so well in the individual life. Too organized is maybe not so good, some organization is good. So make everything so there is a connection, but not one lump. There is connection with the space and the knowing of the relative function through not holding everything as one lump, as “me”.

STUDENT: To take the mind as the path or to take the awareness as the path..?

RINPOCHE: The mind as the path has two steps. Awareness as the path has only one step. If you are skillful, awareness as the path is better…one time I had a very good photographer in California. And I asked, what is the key-point of photography? He said:” Relax, be natural, look, and take”. When I did that, all my photos were up here! But for him that is his talent. He knows all the other techniques. Because he becomes very natural, he becomes himself, he looks at the view in the lens very openly, and then he can take a picture. Then it becomes a very good photo. When his inner lens, his mind, is not cloudy, then he uses the other lens to take the picture. But when his inner lens is very cloudy, it doesn’t know how to cooperate with the other lens.

So I think once you have a good stable rigpa practice, that is the best way. Just recognize rigpa, that’s it. Any emotion comes, just re-recognize rigpa. There is no other way. The emotions naturally become purified. It’s called self-liberation, liberation upon arising, liberation without benefit or harm. So that’s the best way. If there is still something lingering there, although you are totally in rigpa, then: “Oh, hello, I am sorry, I didn’t know you were here”. Then you engage with that and make some kind of handshake so the emotion doesn’t feel left out. It’s a big thing in America, left out – must include. If you don’t include then it’s a big problem. With this method you include the emotions:”Oh honey!” Just say honey, it doesn’t mean much but they will be happy, just like a mantra: honey, honey. Just say honey to your emotion and then you do what you want to do. Same technique we always use: “Oh honey, why don’t you clean my shoes”. You are pursuing the honey but at the end you do what you want to do.

This is just one hand, this side and that side. Both sides are ok. You more or less have to accept it. Emotions are your emotions, whether you are skillfully managing them or not. But it is your thing, the emotion is you. Emotions are your production but used properly or used wrongly that is it. From the Mahayana or Vajrayana point of view emotions are fine. But if you use them wrongly, these emotions are harmful. You need to know how to welcome emotions. It doesn’t mean that you follow all the way. That is the samsaric way of welcoming. If whatever the desire is, you follow it completely, then there is no freedom. This is close to Homeopathic and Aikido- technique, poison taken as medicine. It is poison material, but if you take the right dose, it becomes medicine for the disease. That means you are following the poison, but you also transform it.

STUDENT: Rinpoche, you said that sometimes we can have emotions without thoughts. Is that because we all have “tsa”, “lung” and “tigle”?

RINPOCHE: Yes

STUDENT: Emotions come with that because our bodies are made with those. So then meditation practices involve “tsa, lung, tigle”, is that another way of taking emotions as the path?

RINPOCHE: It is suppose to be that. But you need to know the right way, otherwise it doesn’t function. This Tibetan “tsa, lun, tigle” is designed for the Tibetan mind.

STUDENT: Do I have different “tsa, lung, tigle” than Tibetans?

RINPOCHE: No, but sometimes in modern life we have this subtle restlessness, an emotional problem which we don’t have in Tibet. So they assume you don’t have that problem and then they teach a lot of jumping, a lot of breathing. Sometimes it’s too much, you might get more lung. So instead you go a little bit like yoga: you really take your time, scan yourself and loosen up the knots. Over the years there is the collection of restlessness and underneath there is one’s ego. And you need to let it go. It takes a few months, a few years to really let it go. Then seal it by the mental understanding and it will stay there. So before we practice Tibetan “tsa-lung”, I think it is good to practice the preliminary practice, the Jamlung, subtle vase-breathing.

Speed Problem

Most Tibetan people don’t have this speed-problem. They have a dullness-problem, opposite problem. In most of the three-year-retreats they sleep. When they come out of three-years-retreat, expert on sleeping! So a lot of “trulkor” works for the clarity. In the West the clarity is quite ok. But if clarity is mixed up with emotions then there is a problem. Anything harsh doesn’t work for the body. But a very long time of gentle nurturing opens up. Then the heart is very good. So I think there needs to be a little bit of a new design. But both methods are in Buddhism. And chanting too much is no use in retreat. In some retreats they chant for the whole three years. But if you chant properly, with the feeling, then it is very good for the lung. But if you chant without feeling and the mind is thinking something else – from the mouth restlessly chanting – that is also very bad for lung.

STUDENT: That’s still relative level. When you say chant properly, that means resting in rigpa..?

RINPOCHE: Rigpa or with the mood. With Vajrayogini’s mood. The mood is very important. Vajrayogini and you and in between, the communication is the mood, with the mantra. It’s like acting. A good actor could have the whole of Gandhi’s mood when he is acting. So although he sleeps, it’s with Gandhi’s mood. Tomorrow he wakes up, he drinks just like Gandhi. So slowly, slowly, he can become exactly like Gandhi. If you stay 12 years in retreat practicing Gandhi’s visualization, with full trust, full love maybe you become like Gandhi. So it is the same. You have Vajrayoginis enlightened qualities, Vajrayogini’s love and compassion. Then there is communication, communication, acting, acting, with the feeling. Not dry acting, like Nepali actors:”Trululli lu”…No crying, no juice, nothing. Even 100 years of that kind of practice, it cannot become Vajrayogini. Some good Hollywood actors are told:” Please cry”, they cry immediately, it will not take more than three seconds: their high accomplishment of visualization, with the feeling. I think when Tibetans visualize; they come naturally with some feeling. In the West I think you are cut off from the feeling of the body. So you have no feeling, still you visualize but are dry. You must have feeling, appreciation, devotion and compassion. Every sadhana-practice is like that. But with no feeling then it become a mental drama. That is very bad for the lung. And that is why Vajrayana practice gets a lot of complaints: “So much chanting, so much visualization”. Because you could not get the full feeling. Then it becomes useless.

For westerners I think it is very good to first bring your mind into the body, fully into the body so that your mind becomes emotional, feeling, and sensitive of the body. From there bring the clarity- practice Dzogchen. Otherwise Dzogchen becomes maybe a little bit spaced out. One way is to bring in clarity and then zoom down, close. That is not good. It’s called stupid meditation. A few hours practice, nothing happens. One other way is: “I want to practice Mahamudra, Dzogchen”. The clarity zooms up, so the heart is cut off. So please practice correctly.

What is the most difficult – emotion, restlessness or discipline? I think discipline is the problem.

STUDENT: Do you have any advice about discipline?

RINPOCHE: I think discipline is the major problem for old practitioners. At one level you don’t practice, always staying there somewhere. It doesn’t go very far. People who come to the Dharma are usually quite smart people. They have some kind of understanding of emotions and negativity. Something is bothering them. Then they come to the spiritual path and after they practice a few years, they get this technique:” I know how to bring lung down, I know how to liberate a little bit”. You are quite happy with this technique and then you are stuck there. So you are satisfied with the wrong thing. From a Buddhist point of view, it is a wrong limitation. “This practice gives me joy. Morning one hour and then daytime here and there connect with the rigpa. For rigpa-practice no need to sit in one place, I can go many places, even go shopping”. You think you are practicing when shopping but most of the time you don’t. So you have some assurance that “I can practice any where, any place, any time and I am quite ok”. That becomes the major obstacle. Not going further. Do you understand? That’s why there is a danger for the “Grand Samsaric Master. Through the spiritual practice you know samsara well and the spiritual practice helps samsara to run better! So when you have accomplished that, then you don’t practice any more. When you have problems, lung comes up, bothering you, then emotions, then you practice. When everything is ok, then it is enough. So that is becoming a mundane therapy without having to pay others! That will not really give you a full picture of enlightenment.

If you think “I have achieved this, but I want to achieve more”. Then the next jump to enhancement is the bodhicitta-practice. “I am quite ok. If I can become better, do more practice, do more retreat, maybe I can help sentient beings”. So that’s the click we need. When you have that, then discipline naturally comes. (Rinpoche stops the noisy air condition). The lung went down. This lung we have all the time, with the fear. When you practice, then you turn on the aircon also: “Om benzra satu..”When you switch it off, then relaxed. This is a big difference, very important I think. If my practice goes well, when I practice I become more rested. Then the more you practice, you will not get tired. When this is “on”, then you get really tired.

This is, I am sorry to say, just stupid practice, there is no insight at all. You don’t need this in order to function. But when you become addicted to this, without it you almost cannot function, and then you are very sick already. Then you have to spend so much money on therapy…You understand? But maybe you don’t have this problem. You have stayed too long in Nepal. Maybe you have the opposite problem. “Huncha, Huncha, no problem”. Today always the same, tomorrow always the same. I have one gardener, he always says: No problem, I will come tomorrow at four o’clock”. But he never comes. So my gardener is really Nepali. One day I had a big talk with him, really rough Nepali way of talking. I never talk like that:”If you don’t come, I will kick you out”. But however roughly I say, he answers: “Huncha, Huncha”… He said he will come – still he didn’t come! Every time when taking money, then he comes…

STUDENT: Rinpoche, when you practice and get a bit tired, could that be a sign that actually…

RINPOCHE: There are two ways of being tired. One way is that you sit too long, the blood circulation is not so good, and the body might be tired here and there. This is a different way of being tired. The other is being exhausted mentally, with no mood, no uplift.

STUDENT: So there should always be an uplifted feeling after practice?

RINPOCHE: Yes uplifted, but not like black and white uplift. Not like that. Instead a very pure, clear kind of uplift. Almost unconditional openness. Not like taking coffee-uplift or sugar-uplift. Not like that. But very subtle and normal uplift. When you see Trulsik Rinpoche, Khyentse Rinpoche, Tulku Urgen Rinpoche, there is always uplift somewhere in their mind. In their computer-program there is always openness, uplift, juice. But they are not hyper-uplifted. It is very gentle uplift, organic uplift…

STUDENT: Sometimes Rinpoche, I think maybe I am fooling myself and I think I am recognizing rigpa when really I just achieved the calm state. So should I just carry on as if?

RINPOCHE: Carry on but with the three excellences: refuge, bodhicitta, meditation. At the end dedicate. Then you will not go wrong. Just carry on. To make sure your recognition is authentic you can depend on three things: your own experience, the oral instruction from your teacher and an authentic book, like Longchenpa. If these three things go together, then there is no way to fool yourself. You have to check that with the help of your intellectual mind.

STUDENT: Rinpoche, if we did some connection with the formless as the path in Mahamudra, what is the benefit of still doing for example, “Kyerim” or “Tsalung”-practise?  For example you see the great masters who really are resting in rigpa, but they still keep the form aspect of practice. So what does that add to Mahamudra and Dzogchen?

RINPOCHE: It is a little bit style but actually once you have very authentic, pure understanding of mind nature, either from Mahamudra or Dzogchen, then honestly if you only practice that, within that all the other qualities are naturally included. Then I think you don’t need so much. Within the rigpa, the essence rigpa is emptiness; the expression of rigpa includes all the other qualities like love, compassion, devotion, and pure perception. All these are within the rigpa. But if you also do some accumulation of merit, it will help to give better opportunity. Maybe the merit will give you a father who supports you the rest of your life. Or maybe you will have the right girlfriend or a wife who supports you and both of you practice the whole path. Or maybe you teach in the future, maybe you will have better students. So merit makes all these arrangements keep going. But if you really have all the qualities within the rigpa I think it is sufficient. But Tibetan people they don’t want to take such high risk, so they do both.

STUDENT: Because the best way of accumulating merit is to just rest in rigpa?

RINPOCHE: Yes, if you really can. But sometimes you cannot. It could become a dry rigpa, completely dry. Not expression rigpa, no display. Purely dry, with no thoughts, no emotions, just dry, vacant. That is not good. You have to have the juice, full juice. One great khenpo called Khenpo Munsel didn’t chant, he didn’t do anything for 20 years except for resting in Trekcho. But most of the Tibetan lamas they are a little bit scared. They don’t want to take a high risk so they do both. Khyentse Rinpoche is different you can’t count him. If he was chanting or not chanting or just sat there, for him it didn’t matter. So why not chant within rigpa. And maybe there is also some commitment, so he didn’t want to break that. When he got teaching, maybe the teacher asked him to practice this for the rest of his life. I think Khyentse Rinpoche followed such commitment. Some sadhana you also have to keep up in order to be able to give the teaching. Like the Sakyapa’s: everyday you have to chant the whole thing. If you miss it one day, then you cannot give the empowerment of that deity to other people. So that also makes a lot of lung..!

In the west I think you really need simple deep relaxation. Really, this is very important, I think. Your lifestyle makes you tight, very subtle; the tightness is rooted deep, deep down. Because of that you become successful in everyday life. Somewhere there is “Work, work, I must do it, I am not happy, do more, do something”…Because of that you do a lot of things and then there is success. But sometimes it is distracting for you. There is a way where you can do both I think…I call this modern civilization disease. In America children around 11-12 years old they already have these problems. Because the education is very high on clarity, not so much on emotions. The emotional development is very messed up.

One time I was flying from New York to California, it’s about five hours. Behind my seat was a girl about 12 years with her father. The father made the girl cry all the way, with a honey-smile. But she cried because he gave so many reasons why she was here to her. She understood the reasons, but she needed some flexibility with emotional freedom. So that is very suppressive. The more you get very high education here, then it is suppressive, you lose the carefree, lose the cute, wild openness…15 years old children are already like this:” What is the life?” Seed of worry already planted. That is very bad for opening the heart. But I am sorry; we are all too late already. But there is a way we can clean up. Bring the lung down and every time the bus comes: “Oh bus, let it go”. Then you walk and move without the air conditioner “on”.

STUDENT: Can you say more about how to bring the lung down?

RINPOCHE: First you have to make the connection between the lung and your mind. Just make connection, connection, just long breathing. Then once you have made this connection, then you bring it down with the mental scanning of the lung, with the help of the external breathing, slowly breathing in and out. Then it goes into the center channel and becomes purified. So restlessness, lung, need to become normal lung and then go into the center channel. If you train in that, one day you will naturally know. After 1-2 months practice, the breathing might help you to come down. I think yoga teaches a little bit like that. When you have good lung coming down, all the big muscles in your body also loosen up. You become quite light. Especially you will not become chicken-hearted, not that scared. Some guts is there, some bodhisattva-elements, heroic element.

Real Renunciation

I think we need to practice renunciation and a little bit modern way of renunciation. The old way is: “Life is too complicated, there are 1000 yaks and I don’t know how to handle it. In order to have yaks I need to go to the fields, go to town”…In order to maintain the lifestyle, there is some kind of suffering. But now this life is changed. If you have a bank account and money in the account, you will get a lot of immediate pleasures. Like this air conditioner – immediately on, immediately off. So we are caught by this now. Sometimes because of no air conditioner we might not practice. If you are a little bit dull, you don’t try to clear it from inside. You immediately depend on external clarity. So with a lot of dependence on that, you become caught by immediate comfort and you like it, it gives some immediate pleasure. So the real renunciation is gone. Do you understand? So a new way of thinking become: “Because of all these circumstances I cannot practice the Dharma”. So this is my renunciation object”. You feel sad about that.

“Oh, how I spend my life. The day I became a Buddhist I thought that after 20 years I will have accomplished something”. Now 20 years has gone. How you spent it: a little bit here, a little bit there… And now again you think: “After 20 years something will happen”. So last 20 years it didn’t happen. It might not happen after again 20 years if you don’t change lifestyle…Do you understand? Honestly, if you practice Dharma well, the Dharma will transform you. Look at many beings. Kalu Rinpoch, Chatral Rinpoche and Nyoshul Khen Rinpoche are not born as rinpoches. They are just normal beings and they started from the beginning. And if you end up like Tulku Urgen Rinpoche I think there is no regret. If I end up like the Karmapa or Khyentse Rinpoche I have no regret at all even if the Dharma is wrong, even if the path is completely wrong. So the Dharma can achieve something. But the lifestyle is not like that. So the last 20 years, every single day more or less you think: “After 10-15 years I will have changed, I will have achieved some Dharma”. But then the days, the years are exactly the same. Yesterday is gone, today is gone similarly, tomorrow is similar to yesterday, day after tomorrow is also similar…2007, 2008, 2020! Who are you?!! So you can reflect. All these obstacles are not the suffering obstacles. All these obstacles are the pleasure obstacles, immediate pleasure.

Although you want to practice you think: “I need the best view and the best” kuti” with the right water. Good air, no one bothering, good view, good tree, no Mao problems, then I will practice”. But if you really work hard you might achieve this kind of location. You can find it in Thailand; you can also find it in Katmandu. It is achievable but then it becomes the obstacle sometimes. So you think of all these circumstances. Then you reflect on renunciation based on that.

When you have a real inside change, then renunciation is not a problem at all. You will be very happy and delightful wherever you are. Wherever you practice there is some joy with that simplicity. Because this unsatisfied fear with the ego-lung is changed, is transformed. For example yogis in Tashi Jong have a very simple life but are very rich in their mind stream.

You should use your practice and many of you know how to, but if you don’t, your life becomes a little bit like a hippy. Hippy-practitioner as a lifestyle. If you are happy with that then it is ok. But there is a possibility that you can achieve enlightenment also. That is missing.

STUDENT: How can you use discipline so it improves your practice and also find a balance?

RINPOCHE: You need to have discipline mainly on your action, not inwardly, otherwise it becomes uptightness. The focus of discipline is the laziness. “Oh I need to practice, this is my practice, I want to do”. Just thinking with your mind very tightly, but you don’t do it and you feel a little bit guilty. That kind of discipline is torture. But with healthy discipline, you drop everything even for only ten minutes. During those ten minutes you completely let it go and then practice the Dharma.

You need to apply immediate action. That kind of discipline is very good, without worry.

“Oh I need to practice. Last 20 years are gone like that. Now Tsoknyi Rinpoche told me and I finally realized it. Now these coming 20 years might also go like that. That will happen exactly at year 2020. So I worry”… But you are not acting; just to keep worrying won’t help. Just do! Just do it! Action! Just do it chanting, do it meditation. Just immediately do it. At any occasion, any time, just do it. In the taxi, in the home, when cooking, any time, just do it. And also see what creates more obstacles for not becoming disciplined. Try to change that through organizing yourself and then make discipline. I think daily practice is very good, three hours sitting every day at least. It is not so much, you need to sacrifice a little bit, and you need to change lifestyle a little bit.

You wake up at 5 o’clock. HH Dalai Lama wakes up at 3 o’clock every day. But he organizes it; he goes to sleep a little bit early. If you are a householder you organize it as a team, children, everybody. All talk together, big talk first so there is a common ground. Then respect each other and follow the system. Nyoshul Khen Rinpoche practiced at any place and his wife also practiced. Everybody becomes like one team of Dharma-practitioners. That is very good.

But please don’t follow the way I am exercising, then you will never practice. It is a psychological problem. I need to go to an exercise place but I have only 15 days in Katmandu. No point of going, I think. I should have at least two months time. So I am waiting for that. But there is almost never two months. Actually if you go 15 days regularly and when you are outside of Katmandu, you can do home-practice. Like Mingyur Rinpoche, he is so disciplined. Everyday he practices exercises. He is so slim, so thin, so shiny, no belly… So even if he only has ten minutes before eating, he practices something like jumping 100 times. And that is enough. I could do that also, I have more time than him. But I am waiting to join a club. And so I end up like this (points at his belly). Mingyur Rinpoche travesl more than seven months a year, but he still keeps that discipline, that health club. 20 minutes is so easy, you can find many places. So it is a state of mind. So the kind of mentality that is not OK for practitioners is: “I need to do retreat, to have a good circumstance, I have to talk to the family, and then I will practice”. But this never happens! Never ever happens.

STUDENT: What is the best way to exercise for reducing lung?

RINPOCHE: “Trulkor” – Tibetan yoga and walking in the forest is very good. Everything is green and then just walk and rest in the nature of mind. But when trekking sometimes there is a bad road, and then you have to think. That is not so good, and then the lung will also come up. Better not to use so much mental grasping. At the same time there is some clarity in order for maintaining walking but your mind is not activated.

If you have lung, shopping is very bad, especially for men’s lung. For woman it’s OK. The best way for woman’s lung to come down is to go to the department store. Then lung comes down. For men, one day inside the department store, you go crazy, so many things! In the department store they have a special light that makes you very tired. But it is different if you go as a practitioner. Then it’s OK. Then you go relaxed and that is also a very good practice. But everywhere, anything you are doing you have to have an inside program, a Dharma program and based on this program, you run the whole world.

STUDENT: Program – does it mean the same as motivation?

RINPOCHE: Motivation, plus your mobile phone is “on”, your rigpa is “on”, and your compassion is “on”. You are the computer and then you put in a program. “Today my program is generosity, today my program is resting in the nature of mind”. You go with that program. Then there is no problem. With motivation and attitude you then turn the mobile “on”, then you have what is called in Tibetan “sungjuk”. Then you have consecrated with the help of “yeshepa”. When you consecrate it means the wisdom being is brought into the statue. Otherwise it is just a statue, an object of reminder for the Buddha. But there is not much blessing. Here you are consecrated by the Dharma and with that “statue” then you go shopping! You should live your whole life like that! Then you become a spiritual being. Otherwise you switch off your mobile, come home in the car and then there is nothing, just hollow, no center. Then everything you see is distracted by that kind of state. Then there is no center-point. So you are lost, exhausted, scared. This kind of people the shopping centers really love because you keep buying! Otherwise if you are self-centered and relaxed, you look into the shopping mall and do offerings. When you see nice shoes, you offer: “Sazhi pocho jugshing metog tram”… You are not giving any money to the shop-owner, but you still offer! They don’t like you. When you are completely lost and hollow: “Wow, how nice, ok where is my credit card?” They really welcome you!

When you go into a big supermarket, you can make merit anyplace, anywhere. In a big food market in America, one section has 40 different toothpaste, 100 types of toilet paper, 50 different kinds of shampoo. So many fruits, nuts, dry, fresh, organic, flowers… You see it and feel a whole different world. Then immediately you offer it: “Sazhi pocho”…Let it go, appreciate the goodness of all these things. That is also Dharma-practice. You are changing the concept.

I can do that in America because I am not American. But I cannot do it here in Nepal. Whenever I see a bumpy road I get angry at the government because I was born here. I should offer the road also and practice compassion… When I am in America I am so happy. Those people are very intelligent but they often have emotional problems. If we could change that, then America is the best place to live I think. They have a lot of freedom and they can live in many different ways. The country is very open, the cars are very big, the roads are very big, and people’s thinking is very big…After three years I become American, I get citizenship. But I can’t become president, because I was born outside. Yangsi Tulku Urgen Rinpoche can become president! I thought I was ahead of him but he already has citizenship. He is still the father. For me so much struggle, stay one year, applying. He just came out in Washington DC. It’s close to the White House!

Anyway, please be happy, it’s important! Not stupid happy, but really happy. Loose the lung down and then apply a lot of discipline. Then I think it will be good. Life is a big thing but when it comes down to the simple basics, it’s just surviving. Just one dahl-bat, that’s it really. Dahl-bat is the basis of life. If that is gone, then there is big problem.

On Mental Restlessness

In the world there are a lot of unhappy people, more and more unhappy people. If you can make people happy, then maybe many people can become peaceful, unconditionally happy. The essence of love is just really to be fully open, now, just being happy. Our basic “buzz” needs to be like that. Then you engage with other things. But if the basic “buzz” is unsatisfied, fear, guilt and restlessness, then that is your main source of suffering. In the morning you wake up, something is wrong. Every morning you wake up, something is wrong. But what is wrong you don’t know. You look at many things, compare your life with other peoples’ lives and then it looks quite ok. But something is wrong. That is the disease of lung. So clean that let it go. If you do, it doesn’t slow down your lifestyle. You can still carry on with your project, your family, your Dharma, but without this extra unnecessary force. It’s very unhealthy.

In Nepal we have a different drive: “Oh, it cannot be done, it will not happen, it is so difficult, I will not manage this”. They have this fear. There is some kind of dullness in Asian people’s mind. I think the Dharma need to address all those things otherwise it goes “switch”. Your problem is here, the Dharma flies over it and you pretend “I am fine”, especially in front of the teacher “No problem, fine”. Smiling an artificial smile. But you still have the “buzzz”.

So completely look within and let it go. I think it’s a big jump if you can do that. I am trying to force that to happen and I am trying to make world-peace based on that. That really cools things down and then it is very peaceful for you. I am writing one book about this, connected with loving kindness, compassion and with this restless lung, how to bring it down.

Today the main subject has been lung. The symptom of lung is speed. But I am not talking about action speed, just mental speed, restless speed. That is unhealthy. First we need clarity but the symptoms in your physical speed we don’t want. That is the cause of stress, anxiety. In the West we don’t have so many methods to bring down the lung. Except for holidays! Go on holiday, make a lot of love, drinking, taking drugs, those things. It makes you happy and brings your lung down temporarily. But the side effect is so strong. You drink alcohol and you feel a little bit relaxed because the mind becomes a little bit drunk, so it doesn’t hold you, it gives a little bit of guts. But then you keep drinking, keep drinking and become alcoholic. You have a lot of relationships. Every time a new person comes, your lung goes down. But that person has also a lot of problems: yes, no, different opinions. Then your lung is brought up again. “This person is wrong, the other one is better”. So you go with the other person. In the beginning everything is fine and lung comes down. Then again: “This person is wrong. I’ll go to another”. So your relationship always changes.

When you have a good lung, guts, then everything becomes stable. The character of lung is instability. For the speed of mind and the subtle body, there is not so much advice. But once it becomes very bad “tsoklung, nyinglung”, then there is Tibetan medicine. If it is a very bad lung, then it is maybe not so helpful, so do, for example Tai Chi. Just sitting is good, stupid meditation is good, just sinking down. Like a cow in Boudha at Chabahil (the traffic-junction near Boudha), no lung at all if you look at them. If you have a very strong lung you need a good sleep, a good relationship and to do stupid meditation.

STUDENT: Warm oil massage also brings the lung down.

RINPOCHE: Tibetans say that to eat meat helps but meat makes you dull. Protein gives some earthy element, grounding. Because lung is light, it needs some grounding. And deep, deep down all these problems are grasping, ego-grasping. Really. Any of these problems are self-ego-grasping. You need to let it go, and then everything cools down.

STUDENT: You were saying that bodhicitta and loving kindness-practice was good for bringing lung down. So maybe that?

RINPOCHE: If you know how to do it in the correct way, otherwise it will bring more lung. So slow down and think: “I have 100 days of doing nothing, I have all the time in the world”. That is very good for the lung so then practice bodhicitta. I am talking more or less from my own experience. When I have lung, it is always connected with timing: “I have to do this, to do that, to go here to go there”. All this brings lung up. So the antidote is “Ok, I have all the time”. Talk a little bit to your restlessness. It is really important. Otherwise because your system already has a pattern for this restlessness, when you practice Dharma you will follow the same pattern. I make a big deal of this as a preliminary practice for anything you do. Sit down and talk to yourself. Even though you have only one hour, you think it is 100 hours. “If I finish the practice it’s OK. If I don’t finish it’s also OK. I am not just going to practice. I am really, really going to relax”. OK, do that!

 

Day 2

Rinpoche begins with meditation.

Bring in your feeling or sensation into your body and then settle down. The root of the visualization is appreciation for the Buddha, Dharma and the lineage-carrier in the form of Sangha. So you have a strong appreciation and based on that visualization you can visualize Buddha Shakyamuni in front of you. Buddha is looking to you and is free from all obscurations. Buddha is the embodiment of love, compassion and wisdom. Vividly visualize Buddha in front of you, life- size and looking directly at you, then communicate between your inner Buddha and the external Buddha. Then supplicate: “From now until I reach full enlightenment I take refuge in the Buddha, Dharma and the Sangha”. Really do this with the devotional emotion. That will be very helpful for you to transform your neurotic emotion, your uptightness. Then you will feel safe and secure. The ultimate refuge makes you feel completely safe from your own negative thoughts and emotions.  You feel utterly and basically safe and that is different from subject and object. So the relative refuge and the ultimate refuge sort of work together. Based on that mood and that understanding orally we take refuge.

And then slowly Buddha melts into light, and the light dissolves into you. You, Buddha, Dharma and Sangha are inseparable. If you can, rest in the nature of mind. Within the nature of mind the Buddha, Dharma and Sangha’s qualities are there. So you rest with that.

On Rigpa

You are not stuck by the method, or clinging to the technique or the meditation. So let it go. But at the same time don’t be distracted and don’t meditate. If you meditate, your mind becomes conceptualized. If you are distracted, then that is how you spent all your life. So there is no distraction. Simply rest within the essence of mind. I think you can pursue phenomena through the five senses and understand through the clarity of the mind, but without registering. So it is called “knowing without grasping”. If you grasp, you are registering. But if you don’t know, you are cutting off one part of the omniscience. So especially in the Dzogchen meditation you are allowed to perceive the five sense phenomena. The sixth conscious memory is also allowed to come. Not only that, but all the 84,000 emotions are allowed to come in. But don’t follow, don’t record. Don’t push the saving button. If you can rest without concept, that’s the best. Concept means understanding based on subject and object. Here knowing, understanding or being aware is without relying on an object. The subject itself is the understander. Fully rest. You record, but don’t press the saving-button. It just comes up on the screen. Then let it go. This is called liberation based on arising.

If you can, don’t do anything. This is very subtle. The emptiness is very casual, knowing is very lucid but not intoxicating. So just be here but without being. Your butt is on the ground but not stuck, not glued.

Especially your eyes need to be very alive, just like fresh flowers. If the eyes become a little bit two-dimensioned, then it affects the brain cells, then it affects the mind. So nowness without stuck on the now. 360 degree open but you are not stuck on the openness. When it’s stuck you are missing one quality of the rigpa, the third quality – empty essence, natural clarity and unceasing compassion. So you are blocked and that mind cannot be omniscient.

So we are looking for this kind of cognition. Cognition without grasping, without subject and object. And the senses are very fresh in the nowness, and you are able to rest and to continue. Knowing that is called the view, trying to sustain that is called meditation. Whenever you are lost, coming back into the view is called conduct. Keep doing that for a while.

Keep on with this but not blocked, not stuck and with a very normal consciousness. If you practice this well then there will be the juices of rigpa. Without losing the essence rigpa, the expression rigpa comes as devotion, love, compassion, and sometimes it comes as insight. If you have that, then I think your meditation is going well.

Even if you practice for very long, six to seven years, no juice at all, that means that any time you practice something is stuck in the rigpa. So you have to break that. It could be the alaya, it could be shamata without support, it could be a little bit spaced out, and so unceasing compassion is not there. So you have to destroy the stuckness. I can see sometimes people have these problems. Not only you, sometimes I also get stuck! You know that you are stuck and you have to practice.

There are different ways to break this stuckness. Sometimes you do a bit of rushen or you do the three-fold space practice. But that could make you stuck again in space. You do a bit of enhancement practice. Then one day I think you will be very normal, but very rich. Very clear but not like light clear. Very mineral water clear. Not electric light clear. Very clear from the bottom and even clear from your bones. Clarity is when all the senses are very normal; all the currents in your body are very normal, very in harmony. Within the harmony, deep down there is clarity. So please try that.

When you come to Katmandu, there are many religious things you can get stuck with. In the West you are stuck by external obligations. When you come to the east, you get stuck by the methods. Some inner holding is useful, there are many different methods, but somehow you get stuck by the method itself. In the East many people and teachers are also influenced by different techniques. In Tibetan Buddhism we have so many techniques so everyone says: “this technique is good, that technique is better, you should do this, do that”. Of course you should do that but then you get stuck and overwhelmed by Tibetan Buddhism’s many methods. Then you lose the key-point again. It’s called a spiritual trap. You run from the worldly economical trap and then you come to the East and to the religious Buddhist method trap. I think it’s slightly better than the other one. You need to let it go but not abandon it: “Oh, I’m not going for “kora”, not doing mantra” – Then you abandon the Dharma. Within it you have to find the essence. Our human mind has this black and white understanding.

Khyentse Rinpoche did all the methods but he was not caught by them. He was not really emotional about his chanting or got stuck with his chanting. It was just part of his practice. But he also had the translucent clarity of rigpa. Within that he practiced.

I think if you really want to use your time properly in Nepal, you use both the practical and the spiritual path, both methods. At the same time understand the essence of nature of mind. When these two are combined, then it is useful. I think that many students are stuck by so many methods. And now Tulku Urgyen Rinpoche is not here so you will not get so much support for practicing the nature of mind. He is one of the heroes in Katmandu valley. So he really supports you. If you do all the methods, then he also supports very much just resting, sitting in the nature of mind. Nowadays you cannot find so many Dzogchen teachers. They are a little bit afraid of talking about it and instead, say: “Oh, you must do all the regular practices first otherwise it is very dangerous”. Then you start to feel: “Oh, maybe I am doing wrong, maybe Tulku Urgyen Rinpoche was wrong, maybe simply resting the mind is not sufficient, maybe I have to do all this first, do all that first”. To attend many years in the Shedra, do again the whole Ngondro, do billions of mantras – maybe too old for that. So I feel this is very much happening, in the West and in Nepal also. Less guts to go directly to the nature of mind. Teacher afraid, student afraid!

Tulku Urgyen Rinpoche always said you should do one Ngondro and have one good yidam, nature of mind practice, accumulation, and devotion. Upper, devotion, lower, compassion, in the middle, the right view supported by one yidam and then go on. Keep going, Jonny Walker! Just keep walking, keep going, keep going! You who received Tulku Urgyen Rinpoche’s teachings and did not study all these things, it’s ok. Just keep going with his teaching. Full devotion to him and the Dharma and keep walking. And practice with the discipline.

Those days at Nagi Gompa arriving at three o’clock, at seven o’clock there are already teachings on the nature of mind. So happy going up to the mountain! Nowadays when I go and see other teachers, there is a lot of tantric smell, very good and pleasant. But you cannot hear at all about nature of mind. The nature of mind is hidden or maybe not there… Maybe they don’t know, who knows. You cannot be too much romantic about lamas. Maybe sometimes they do not know about nature of mind! The West has a romantic feeling about Tibetan Buddhism, which is very good. Not against it, but…

Please come back again and again. Do the yidam-practice, bodhicitta, compassion – they are so important. But at the same time, the non-conceptual clarity view is extremely important! Our mind is very conditional, like a hungry dog. Wherever there is a smell of food, you go there and then you are stuck there. It is very dependant. Long time ago I didn’t understand about the Western concept of having support. Nowadays I think support is very important, spiritual support.

Before I didn’t want to buy a computer but now I have bought three times. Why? Because of so much influence and support from advertising that you should have it. If you don’t have it you are not OK! So they sell by instilling fear – “You are not happy because you don’t have a computer”. You are caught by that, buying a computer because your inside is hollow – no love. You are looking for conditional love all the time. Because no human value, no inner value is there, so you are looking for external value all the time. For a short time you become happy. You think it is inner value when you get your new computer and for the first few days, so happy! But when it gives a problem, you think, “My inner value is giving me problem”. But actually it is the computer. So everything is mixed up. Not such a wise way of living. So you must have an inner chip, inner program. Buddhism is set up very well with an inner chip program. And rigpa’s program is like a mini chip. Everything is there, everything is included. So if you really practice nature of mind well, all the Dharma is included there. It’s like a mini chip. But you can also have different discs. You can buy refuge disc, compassion disc, but then they are left here and there. Better to have one small, click! So please have more guts on the practice.

The computer sellers are doing their job so well and we have to do our job – not to become sucked in, not to promote our lung. Looking too much into a computer promotes your lung. Because you can do so much in the computer within a short time, you become greedy and then you want to do a lot, have full information authenticity. But you can’t, it takes time. So you rest, you change attitude and be more patient. “Ok I know it takes time, I’ll work slowly, if page comes or not, no problem. Ah so good, I have opportunity to rest in the nature of mind in-between”…

Anything you do I think has to have an inner program to deal with that. Then I think you will transform. Like Shantideva said: “You can’t transform the whole world and cover it with leather, so instead you put leather under your feet”. That is beneficial for you.

STUDENT: When practicing, there are undercurrent thoughts…, I can feel the clinging is definitely still there. How can one be free from that?

RINPOCHE: There are two ways. One is the traditional way; another is a modern way. The traditional way is: because you are not fully in the ripga, sometimes the clarity is resting but not fully united with the emptiness. That’s why you give some opportunity for the undercurrent thought. It is very important not to mix up the undercurrent thought with the normal thought. If you are in rigpa, as soon as the normal thoughts come they are self-liberated. So there is no problem. Everything is done on the spot. But with undercurrent thoughts, you just stay in rigpa but here it makes some story. It does not really come to the surface but behind is some story. There is some clinging, some hope, some fear. That means that natural clarity is not unified with emptiness. Then you re-focus so it becomes a little bit sharp, full. Then this undercurrent thought will go. Sometimes this undercurrent thought is worry and you have already built up a quite long history in the form of undercurrent thought. Although you are resting in nature of mind, because of the undercurrent thought, it becomes like two departments. So when you are resting in nature of mind, this other one is doing its own thing. They say it’s caused mainly by worry and fear and that makes subtle tensions in its own way. So when you practice and have this that is not good. So what you do is that everything goes down into this. Also the clarity – zoom – join it. Try not to cut it. Just let the upper practice really go into the undercurrent thought and join it, so one level drops down. Do you understand? You come down and really relax completely and look into the core of the fear, the fundamental core of the uptight fear. And within that you find rigpa.

This undercurrent thought – we call it thought but actually it is lot of subtle emotional fear. Fear, work and connection with different project: building monastery-project, translation-project, running Gomde-project. On the surface it is the practice but there is another mind working with this project. That needs to be brought together. If you don’t bring these two together, then it’s not healthy and that will create some major problem in the future. So either way – you synchronize or you go into that emotion, that worry and from there join, make peace talk between them. Then you make this into a habit.

Sometimes by resting in nature of mind it’s perfectly fine, no undercurrent thoughts. But then depending on your lifestyle, sometimes some worry comes because rigpa is too open. So rigpa gives too much freedom for thought and emotions, they are allowed to come. In shamata, you don’t give any freedom, it’s like a monarchy. Rigpa is fully democracy. If everybody is well educated, then there is no problem. If not, so many things come. All the time there are demonstrations because you are not occupied with one thing. So anything can come. So if you have a major big worry, that can also come into the rigpa, because you are not blocking or suppressing. There is no suppressing at all in rigpa. Everything is fresh and open. But then anything can come. So if something comes, forget about rigpa. Then turn your awareness to that, then within that you find rigpa.

All the cells, all the senses, all the thoughts, and all the emotions they are looking for liberation. All sentient beings look for well being or freedom. Anger needs love and compassion. So every cell in your body is looking for some well being. So happiness is our basic sentient beings’ right.

If you have a project this undercurrent thought comes up easily as lung, speed. Then it’s sometimes good to practice loving-kindness. Really go down to the undercurrent thought: “I think you need some love, you need some ice cream of compassion, and you need some moisturizing cream”. So you fully rest with that and then when they have become quiet, then I think you need the clarity also. “You are quite moisturized but you look stupid! You need some clarity”. Then you can approach emptiness, egolessness within that.

Sometimes Dzogchen gives you the impression that clarity is up here. Of course clarity is here. But if you are caught up down there, it you don’t bring down the clarity, it has its own world. Maybe the palace is very clean, but it doesn’t know what is happening in the street. That’s why the streets become the problem for the palace. So between the palace and the streets, it’s cut off. The palace stays so rich, so much food but the street is the problem and sooner or later there will be problems there. So zoom down, moisturize, therapy, yoga and then give clarity. Then in modern language: mind and heart are working together. New age way of talking, without religion. I think it is very important.

In Tibet if the mind is OK, then naturally the heart becomes part of that. So many teachings are on the mind, to make mind clear, because mind is not that clear sometimes in Tibet, sleepy. If you practice much feeling, mind becomes naturally clear also. But in the western world there is quite a big gap between the physical and the mental. The mental does its work; the physical does its work. No communication between them. Then the foundation will go down, without communication.

It’s a very good point, this undercurrent of thought. It is very problematic and we take a lot of advantage of it also. Because the undercurrent thought is somewhat connected with a hidden agenda. So the hidden agenda is working with this undercurrent thought: “Hi, so nice! But the undercurrent thought: “Maybe this person is not so good”. So there are two worlds and we give quite good right to the undercurrent thought to go on.

Compassion and Hidden Selfishness

So what is Buddhism’s hidden agenda? In everything we do there is a hidden agenda. I think Buddhism’s hidden agenda is bodhicitta, compassion. If anything you do is to achieve bodhicitta – relative and ultimate bodhicitta – then it’s fine. That’s the whole point. When you look at the bodhisattvas way, they teach bodhicitta. In order to fulfill bodhicitta you have to do the six paramitas, visualizations, prostrations, mandalas, all these different methods to achieve bodhicitta mind. In any Buddhist practice if you don’t have this hidden goal, it does not go the right way. If you don’t bring bodhicitta into the prostration and the prostration’s hidden agenda is to be healthy: “I am doing spiritual practice”, but secret agenda is “maybe I’ll get some muscles’, maybe my blood sugar will go down”…So its ok, but your hidden agenda is not bodhicitta. Sometimes this hidden agenda is missing I think. In any Buddhist practice the final focus is bodhicitta. In order to fulfill bodhicitta we do millions, billions of different methods. So we should not forget our mission, the hidden agenda. That’s why Nyoshul Khen always says: “Good motivation, check your motivation”. In the middle of the teaching he says: “Ok stop the teaching now, check your motivation”. He changes his motivation and he asks us to change our motivation. So this is to not forget our mission.

Sometimes practitioners’ motivation is quite selfish. High class selfishness: “Me peaceful, me joyful, me happy, me well being. In order for my well being I use other people because it’s interdependent. If I don’t make her or him happy, I will not become happy”. It is peace, selfish peace. Selfish peace becomes our hidden agenda most of the time I think. That’s why beings are always stuck in samsara.

Sometimes when you do many things externally it destroys your hidden peaceful selfishness. Then you lose the motivation to help others also. Quite often it’s like that. You want to help a project, “Wow, so happy”, but somewhere halfway – also everything goes well, but it doesn’t go according to the fulfilling of your hidden agenda – then you create some problems. Then halfway: “I am sorry, I am going”. Especially voluntary work, easy to get out. If you get paid, then it is different. Although you don’t like it, you cling to the cash! So you become tolerant: “Although I don’t like it, I must do it because I need these US dollar in order to survive. So I think your hidden agenda is very important to change. Then I think you will really have inner strength. Tulku Urgen Rinpoche, Khyentse Rinpoche and HH Dalai Lama they never get tired, exhausted to see people, to help people. If the people are happy, they are happy. It the people are not happy, they are happy also! So it means they are really well established in their hidden agenda, with bodhicitta and sealed by unconditional love, really sealed by unconditional love. Then you get real strength and you are not becoming like a Tibetan prayer-flag. Wherever the wind blows, the flag goes that way. No wind, no support, no excitement, nothing, then it goes down.

Whenever I get mentally tired it’s because of not having really good bodhicitta. One time Tulku Urgen Rinpoche stayed at Osel Ling for six months and I was staying about two months with him. He sees people, he put consecration in the statues, and he gathered all these things and he sent people to Kha-Nying and Nagi Gompa. So many things he did from morning to evening and I worked with that. I got really, really completely exhausted, really tired. So I said: “I would like to go to Pokhara”. He said: “What?” Really in my mind came the idea of wearing normal cloths and going on the lake, drinking some Coca Cola, just resting, looking at the lake with no obligations. So I said “I want to go to Pokhara”. He said: “What?”. I said it three times and he said “Why?” Then I felt a little bit funny. He asked: “Why are you going?” I said I like to go there a bit to rest, relax…”What, why?” So he asked all the reasons why I need to be relaxed and rest in Pokhara. Why not rest here. And he pretends he doesn’t understand. He takes advantage of his lack of hearing. Which he don’t like so much he said “What?” Then you ask two, three times and then your mind becomes loosened up or something. He used that method quite often. So then I gave up, I didn’t go to Pokhara. But there is a big thing in my mind: he is about 70 and I was about 30. I am really exhausted, he was not exhausted. He was still full of enthusiasm. I think it’s the mind, deep down where you really stay. Your hidden agenda is not fulfilled: To rest in the folding-chair with remote-control, sit there and drink coffee, watch the news and relax… So maybe you have this kind of agenda sometimes in the mind, hidden. But he doesn’t have that. So when his lifestyle doesn’t fulfill my hidden agenda, then I got exhausted. All the time I was looking for some gap to relax, some gap for a folding-chair… So you want this kind of lifestyle sometimes I think.

His inside is really motivated by helping people, seeing people. No matter what people are offering – money or not money. Money is not the issue. People who don’t have money, he gives back the money. He is quite famous for that. If people are quite poor then he checks with the nuns: “How much does this cost?” Then the nun will go and calculate. Then he added a bit more than that and when they come and say the final bye-bye, he put the money – prepared before – tied in a kata and put it around the person. So I think giving teaching is not really for making money. His fully hidden agenda is bodhicitta. Then he doesn’t get tired. I am talking about the emotional tired, the mental tired, not the physical tired.

In town I see many people whose eyes are really hopelessly exhausted and a little bit sad down there. That is the poison, take out that. The standard problems are anger, attachment, jealousy, pride and ignorance. We have these standard problems, all sentient beings, wherever we go. But the culture problem, the environment, new problems like restless lung – some countries have, some don’t. To feel bad about yourself all the time, like hollow – some countries produce it, some don’t. But all have the five poisons; these are the standard for all sentient beings. But sometimes you have to take out this culture-created suffering before you practice authentic Buddhism.

Tibetans need more clarity, westerners need more emotional healing. I call it wounded love. In the west it is very high. The love-area is very hurt. Wrong expectations, wrong approach and in order to feel love, you have to have some external thing to love you.

Essence love is together with nature of mind and Buddha-nature, unconditional love. I call it essence love, expression love and boundless love. I think essence love we are missing completely. We are only experiencing expression love, which comes with attachment. The pure essence love is gone. The essence love is almost like well being, just love, why love, how love. Love is like a noun, not as a verb. When you have this then you practice engaging love or expression love and that is coming from the essence love. So it’s more pure love. And that you practice together with the four boundlessnesses. Otherwise just jump to the boundless, I think it might not work, because it will not start from the essence love.

I think human beings are really sensitive about love in general and their love is completely mixed up without the essence love. All love is connected with attachment and it becomes subject and object. Then there is the wound, hurt and it becomes very sensitive, a big confusion of love. The fundamental unconditional essence love is missing in all cultures. In the western culture more so because your wounded love comes from expression love with attachment. You are not satisfied with that but there are no other alternatives. There is no teaching, no one talks about it. So it becomes unclear. Some poems might tell something or some song might point to something, but there is no full technique or support for that. Then it comes back into the attachment love.

Boundless love is what Buddhism talks about – to share, to feel the same love for all sentient beings. What you feel for your child, for your parents, you should feel for all sentient beings exactly the same.

STUDENT: What is essence love?

RINPOCHE: Essence love is important. It’s just well being like love, love to your cells, to your body. There is no restlessness; your mind is not harsh. Just rich, well being, love, lovable. Then when you are there then you love. Then it’s not so much me, me, me. You become the love. No need to feel me happy, me important because you are sort of imbued with love.

STUDENT: Rinpoche that sounds like a quality of Buddha nature.

RINPOCHE: Yes one part of Buddha nature, loving-kindness. Every quality is in the Buddha nature: the fundamental peace, the fundamental clarity, the fundamental love, the fundamental compassion. So these things are missing. Because everything is subject – object love, subject – object peace, subject – object compassion, subject – object clarity. Then there is no basic ground.

You feel very peaceful with this incense. When this incense is finished then you are craving more. You put so much value on this incense. Why? Because it gives you some mental peace. But this mental peace is temporary and the real value is not on the incense, it is on the mind and this incense is emptiness. Support and life are different. Life means you are addicted, without this you cannot stand it. Support means if you have, it’s good, if you don’t have, it’s also ok. That attitude we also find in the Vajrayana, where you are not abandoning the merit circumstances. You use that circumstance to do more prayer, more offering, more dedication and more merit-recycling. You should recycle your merit, otherwise your merit will be exhausted. One time used – gone!

STUDENT: Could you give a definition of merit.

RINPOCHE: Merit is making better opportunities in your everyday life. That kind of energy is created.

STUDENT: Opportunities for experiencing your own mind?

RINPOCHE: Opportunities for your mind, for your life according to spirituality. Focus on the spiritual path in order to be successful on your path.

STUDENT: So whether something achieves that or not is the function of both action and motivation?

RINPOCHE: Action and motivation, both and dedication also. I think it is a little difficult to understand merit but one easy way is that it makes habits. That kind of merit is easy to understand. In Tibet wherever you go it gives you a spiritual merit or habit. You see the rock and there is a mantra with “Om mani peme hung”. You see the water where some “Mani”-mantra are running with the help of the water, you see monastery… It’s like advertising. Advertising makes some kind of merit. Like buying Sony-computer. Accumulation of that, then after four, five years I bought it one day. You plant seed in the alaya and one day all these seeds and maybe you also have some cash, then boom – you buy! Instead of buying something else, like a statue, you buy Sony. So merit works like that. Every time you conceptually pray “mani”, you dedicate it. This makes you a spiritual person. Because of all these circumstances of merit it is easy to rest in the nature of mind, because good circumstances are there. One day you might want to go for a three year retreat. If you don’t have the merit, you will not go. There is the visible accumulation of merit and there is the invisible way of accumulating merit, like doing “tsok”, prayers for Mahakala. I think in order to live a proper life you need to have both the visible and the invisible accumulation. So merit does both of these. Sometimes you prepare everything but then something else happens. So the invisible force is not enough.

STUDENT: We didn’t have enough merit for it to happen..?

RINPOCHE: Sort of. It’s out of your plan. Your planning condition is very good, but something happens. That is not enough merit and not enough aspirations. Aspirations are important. It seems like aspirations are not important but I think they are very, very important. So please pray at the stupa. There are two great stupas here in Katmandu. Make aspirations really authentically: “May I have time for practice in retreat”. If you have good aspiration you will not get so many problems. Even though you stay six years in retreat, it’s just easy! You don’t need to force so much because the aspiration merit gives you good circumstances. You will not get tired, you will not get exhausted…

STUDENT: The circumstances might not be different but my attitude to them might be…

RINPOCHE: The circumstances might change also!

STUDENT: Could you speak about the essence of coemerging wisdom – emptiness and appearance as a unity?

RINPOCHE: Theoretically you can explain it in one way, experientially you can explain in one other way. If you want to explain through experience, you have to understand the nature of mind. First empty essence and within empty essence of mind you look, you come to the phenomena. The phenomena are there but they are not really there, like solid. So emptiness and phenomena are a unity and these phenomena are mere reflections of your karmic experiences. They are not really there but right now there is no choice because your karmic experiences did not yet become exhausted. So at this point you deal with it by respecting it relatively.  The clarity of the empty cognizant, “nangtong sungjuk”. “Nangwa”, appearance, “tongpa”, emptiness. “Sungjuk” means unity, inseparability. It’s not like two things coming together. So within the phenomena, just realize the emptiness. Emptiness and phenomena, then there is unity. If you give up appearances then it cannot be a unity with emptiness.

STUDENT: Why do they call it co emergent?

RINPOCHE: Coemergent wisdom is: the wisdom is never separated from you. It’s together; it’s intrinsically there. Buddhism’s intrinsically doesn’t mean permanently. It is independently co emergent, called wisdom. We are not talking about the ground; we are talking about the path. On the path there are always experiences. Otherwise recognize rigpa: no need to recognize, it’s always there. Why do you need to recognize? Is rigpa a new thing? No, but in language we use recognize rigpa or not. Coemergent wisdom is the same. In language you have to divide it into three: ground, path or fruition. Ground is used a little bit different; fruition is used a little different. Path always has an action, subject and object, realize, understand, achieve, practice. It’s always verbs.

STUDENT: How can one identify and find one’s root-lama?

RINPOCHE: Sometimes it’s very easy, sometimes it’s not. Traditionally you have to search for three or nine years they say. But I think this is also connected with the karmic system. If you have a strong package of karma, then you will see. Just “shopping” around here and there and one day it just clicks in your mind: “Oh, this is my root-teacher!” But if you can’t find, then you have to study: what I am, the teacher’s background, the teacher’s lineage, reputation. Your teacher’s style, your style, your condition and then you see. Maybe you can’t find or you don’t have the capacity to see that the teacher is 100% correct. So if you see that 75% is good, then go for it! If you only see that 10% is good and 90% is not ok, then don’t go! It’s same like marriage! If you see the wife is 75% good, just marry! If you see she is only 10% good and 90 %is not ok, then don’t marry.

When you really have a realized understanding and you become almost the same as the teacher, then you will see the teacher as 100% ok. Until then, you can’t. So you look around. See the different web sites and then you go one month here, one month there. Then you also look at the style of the teacher: systematic style, more loose style, more yogic style, more scholarly style. And what type of person you are. If you are very scholarly and you see a yogi, you might get fed up. If you have a real yogic kind of approach and you see a scholar, your head becomes boiled. This you also have to check. Then there are some standard teachers you can go to, world recognized teachers with a bit of standing. But they are not necessarily very helpful for you. Sometimes a hidden yogi will have a lot of time. If you meet a very simple yogi or yogini with teeth upside down, a lot of puss in their eyes, digging their nose, they might have a very good insight, a very high understanding. Some yogis in Tashi Jong are exactly like that.

It you really want to practice, go to a small teacher, a really good small yogi teacher and then you can get a lot of time with them. If the teacher has no time, then there is no use. Like me, if you look at my web side then you will know: “Oh no!”

STUDENT: You say that the teacher doesn’t have a lot of time, it’s no use, but it’s also said that the blessings of the lama don’t depend on being with him.

RINPOCHE: That’s also possible, but if you really like to study then you need time. There are different types of people. For some that is ok. But for some other they need the physical time. Some students have psychological problems: “I must have time with the teacher. If you are this type of person, then the teacher who doesn’t have time for you is the wrong teacher. Some students you see at the teaching-time and a little bit private and that’s it. Private or not private time is not so different sometimes, but the human mind needs the private time: “This is my private teaching”. But actually it’s exactly the same teaching as in the group teaching. Teachings from Tulku Urgen Rinpoche in groups are even better then private. But your emotion: “This is one- to -one”. Me, me, you are proud, egos game again. But when you have a special experience then you might not want to share it with others. Then you talk private, maybe it’s useful. But in my own experience teaching in a group is much better. Khyentse Rinpoche, Tulku Urgen Rinpoche, Adue Rinpoche gave group teachings. And these days I think there is more chance to get group teaching then one to one teaching.

STUDENT: How is the experience of being caught by the alaya?

RINPOCHE: The subtlety of stuckness is there. Stillness and stuckness are two different things. Rigpa has also stillness, very pure stillness. But when there is a bit of gross stuckness – no thought, very clear, then it’s alaya. When there is a very normal translucent state, then it’s rigpa.

STUDENT: Can the experience of the alaya also be somewhat open?

RINPOCHE: Open and aware, yes. Alaya is quite a good thing, it’s close to rigpa. Many, many meditators are staying there, different traditions of meditators. Even non meditators are sometimes resting there, in the Sauna, somehow resting in the alaya. Alaya has different degrees.

STUDENT: I thought alaya was more dull.

RINPOCHE: The gross alaya is very dull but the subtle alaya is not dull, it’s very close to rigpa. But sometimes there is no choice. You stay in the alaya and from there through the devotion, through the effort, the understanding it will shift automatically to the rigpa.

STUDENT: The key to the shift is trying to generate devotion?

RINPOCHE: Devotion and merit and depending on some good book. Maybe there is some danger for coming into the alaya, so try not to. But don’t fear it, alaya is also ok, it’s not a bad thing. But stupid alaya is very, very, very bad, like dull, stupid. Stupid meditation, that’s not good. Dzogchen and Mahamudra are against that.

Rigpa and alaya are depending on two different materials, but they are very similar. For example, one is cotton, the other is plastic. The color is very similar but the basic material is different. One is nirvanic material, the other is samsaric material. But they look similar, like real flower and plastic flower. Quite often I thought the real flower was plastic because plastic is made so good. It’s two completely different materials but very similar in some areas.

STUDENT: So samsara and nirvana aren’t so different, it is easy to mistake?

RINPOCHE: It’s two different materials until the absolute nature of the alaya is realized. The absolute nature of the plastic flower and the real flower are both emptiness. The absolute nature of samsara and nirvana are not different, but the relative nature is different.

STUDENT: I have found that the wisdom is something that doesn’t arise within the meditation but during the post-meditation. So if you rest in the alaya there is no quality of wisdom or insight that arises from that or is there?

RINPOCHE: To some extent, but not real wisdom. Peaceful, some kind of awakeness, some kind of clarity. But not real omniscient wisdom but some siddhi might come. Siddhi comes from the stillness. Actually Shamata is also some form of alaya, alaya with mindfulness. Close to rigpa there is subtle alaya. I don’t think you need to meditate even . Just sit there and then you come into the alaya. But then there is always some kind of subtle glue, a little bit murky, not really crystal clear. So it is hard to distinguish. But don’t worry about that. Just pray not to go there and make accumulation of merits. And then try your best!

End with Dedication of Merit

“Advice on the Path”

Copyright Tsoknyi Rinpoche 2006

Teachings given at Swyambu, Katmandu May 2006

Transcribed and edited by Lodro Palmo and Madhu under Rinpoche’s supervision.

 

For more info, please download this text Retreat Lung: The Meditator’s Disease

or see: https://tsoknyirinpoche.org/teachings/all-about-lung-tsoknyi-rinpoche/

Photo by Lucas Pezeta from Pexels

Low Carb Shirataki and Kelp Noodle Stir Fry

I discovered these healthy low-carb noodles to make giant, guilt-free healthy and nutritive stir frys. It’s important to boil the noodle first to soften. I add pan fried tofu squares that I cook separately, and feel free to add other veggies like mushrooms and red bell peppers.

Look for these:
https://miraclenoodle.com/collections/all/products/fettuccine

Ingredients:

• 1 package (7 oz) shirataki konjac pasta, drained
• 1 package (7 oz) clear kelp noodles
• 1 tablespoons toasted sesame oil
• 2 tablespoons minced garlic
• 2 tablespoons minced ginger
• 1 yellow onion, large diced
• 1/2 cup chopped green beans
• 1/2 cup chopped broccoli
• 1/2 cup chopped cauliflower
• 6 washed and sliced baby carrots or 1 large sliced carrot
• ¼ cup soy sauce
• 2 tablespoons rice vinegar (optional)
• 1 tablespoon monkfruit sugar
• 1 teaspoon Tabasco or sriracha to taste
• 2T olive oil for cooking

Add the protein of your choice.

Directions:

Important: Boil 1 cup of water in a fry-pan and cook both noodles covered for 5 minutes, drain and set aside.
Add olive oil to frying pan and cook on medium heat, sautéing garlic, ginger and then all remaining ingredients, and then add the sesame oil after cooking.
Serve with your protein, parsley or cilantro garnish.

Shirataki

Shirataki Noodle Stir Fry

IMG 4664

Low Carb Shirataki and Kelp Noodle Stir Fry

I discovered these healthy low-carb noodles to make giant, guilt-free healthy and nutritive stir frys. It's important to boil the noodle first to soften. I add pan fried tofu squares that I cook separately, and feel free to add other veggies like mushrooms and red bell peppers.

Ingredients
  

  • 1 package 7 oz shirataki konjac pasta, drained
  • 1 package 7 oz clear kelp noodles
  • 1 tablespoons toasted sesame oil
  • 2 tablespoons minced garlic
  • 2 tablespoons minced ginger
  • 1 yellow onion large diced
  • 1/2 cup chopped green beans
  • 1/2 cup chopped broccoli
  • 1/2 cup chopped cauliflower
  • 6 washed and sliced baby carrots or 1 large sliced carrot
  • ¼ cup soy sauce
  • 2 tablespoons rice vinegar optional
  • 1 tablespoon monkfruit sugar
  • 1 teaspoon Tabasco or sriracha to taste
  • 2 T olive oil for cooking

Instructions
 

  • Directions:
  • Important: Boil 1 cup of water in a fry-pan and cook both noodles covered for 5 minutes, drain and set aside.
  • Add olive oil to frying pan and cook on medium heat, sautéing garlic, ginger and then all remaining ingredients, and then add the sesame oil after cooking.
  • Serve with your protein, parsley or cilantro garnish.

Notes

Add the protein of your choice.

kiwi
free weight loss course

 

 

Many of us gained weight during our Covid isolation, I’ve heard it called tongue in cheek the “Covid 19” meaning many gained just about 19lbs! I have compiled a scientifically proven weight loss plan that is healthy, simple and sustainable that I have used myself. It was recommended to me by other moms who’ve had great success with sustainable weight loss! This is not medical advice, this protocol below is from my personal experience only. For me it starts working on day 1. Please do check with your doctor before starting any diet, especially a reduced calorie one as there can be serious complications for certain people such as diabetics. This is a hybrid plan of about 4 diets all distilled into 1 easy to follow, healthy plan. It borrows from the Metabolic Factor primarily, Optavia® (Medifast®), Low Carb., Whole Food and Intermittent Fasting, all in one!

The main way that this diet is successful, is consistency. I failed a few times at it because I’d be really great and stick to it religiously for 4 or 5 days in a row, and then reward my efforts by~ cheating- a giant dinner out with family, with… dessert!  What my coach said is that it takes a few days to stoke your metabolism to start burning fat, if you cheat every few days, the body stops the metabolic process and starts storing fat again. Also, this diet differs from Optavia because it includes whole foods, and not unhealthy pre-paid, prepackaged, high carb. “fuelings,” with weird chemical sugar substitutes.  I have had better success eating more than less, if the calories are too restricted for you, you can get tired, dizzy, grouchy and god-forbid, put it all back on and then some, once you return to more normal eating patterns. A weight loss of 1-2lbs per week is considered safe. I’ve heard doctors say that any healthy diet that includes reducing calories and increasing exercise works, and consistency is the key– as Yoda reminds us “do or do not, there is no try.” Are you ready to commit for at least 30 days? Let’s do this!

 

8 STEPS TO A NEW YOU!

  1. Start with 6 Minutes of Burst Exercise Every Morning and 5-10K steps each day.

  2. Eat 5, whole food, high protein and vegetable (100-120 calorie) “snacks”  approx. every 2 hours.

  3. Eat 1 high protein and vegetable whole food “lean and green” meal per day (600-700 calorie), choose afternoon or early evening.

  4. Intermittent Fasting, it’s called 15:9 IF- eat all of your calories in a 9 hour, consistent block like 9:00-6:00.

  5. Drink 8 glasses of water each day.

  6. No alcohol, soda, fruit juice or sugary drinks.

  7. Stop eating refined sugar and refined carbs.

  8. Track meals and calories, water, fitness, steps and progress with an online paid app like Noom or for free, with MyFitnessPal.

 

1. Start with 6 Minutes of Intermittent Burst Exercise Every Morning and 5-10K steps each day.

Before you consume anything other than water, as soon as you wake up, do only 6 minutes of intense cardio, like jumping jacks, (or for Buddhists like me, we can do 100 prostrations which are like sacred squat thrusts!). I do 1 min. interval jumping jacks- 1 min. fast walk-jump 3 x 3 sets, or if you can run outdoors for 6 minutes. If you have an elliptical, do a fast 6 mins. on the interval setting, do push yourself! This jump starts your entire metabolism, and the body already begins to start burning fat. You can get a Fitbit or pedometer and walk every day, sun and fresh air does wonders for body-mind-spirit!

2. Eat 5, whole food, high protein and vegetable “snacks” approx. every 2 hours.

Eat proteins and fresh, organic, living vegetables. I created some perfect egg and veg. 100 calorie snacks and here are some more ideas.

3. Eat 1 high protein and vegetable whole food “lean and green” meal per day, choose afternoon or early evening.

Coaches call these “lean and green” meals. Create a basic high protein, low carb. veggie lunch or dinner. Some grains are ok, make the meal satisfying and nice, no need to count calories per se.

4. Intermittent Fasting: eat all of your calories in an 9 hour, consistent block like 9:00-6:00, it’s called 15:9 IF.

This doctor explains intermittent fasting and helps to undo some diet myths.

5. Drink 8 glasses of water each day.

Yes 8, full glasses, this helps to hydrate, detox, digest and keeps you full.

6. No alcohol, soda, fruit juice or sugary drinks.

This is essential, but sugar free coffee and teas are fine, if you have to, use stevia, xylitol or monkfruit sweetener on occasion, but rarely as even alternative sweeteners can affect insulin.

7. Stop eating sugar and refined carbs.

Yes, no flour and sugar dessert, pasta or heavily starchy foods. Some quinoa, amaranth, barley, wheat-berries, brown or organic rice and occasional potatoes are ok.

8. If need be, at least at first, track meals and calories, water, fitness, steps and progress with an online paid app like Noom or for free, with MyFitnessPal.

This is a 1200-1300 reduced calorie diet sufficient for standard weight loss for most people under 200lbs. You may need more or less caloric intake depending on weight, age, health, gender and level of physical activity. Please consult with your doctor, nutritionist or online weight loss coach for a custom plan and guidelines.

weight loss

Disclaimer:

The techniques, ideas, and opinions here are not intended as a substitute for proper medical advice. The information provided here is solely for informational purposes only. All information is generalized, presented for informational purposes only, not medical advice, and not to rely on this information as medical advice and to consult a qualified medical, dietary, fitness or other appropriate professional for their specific needs. Sakura Designs, LLC and Dawn Boiani waive all liability for any harm. This information has not been evaluated by any government agency and the information is not intended to “diagnose, treat, cure or prevent any disease.”

Photo by Any Lane from Pexels

healthy sunday granola

Yogurt and Granola Parfait Sundays

My teen daughter has… not one, not two but…three girlfriends staying over for summer vacation and it’s been hard to get them to eat a healthy breakfast. This is by far the most decadent of all of my recipes, but a sure fire way to get any sleepy breakfast-rebelling child to eat! A Yogurt and Granola Parfait Sunday topped with fruit, caramel or chocolate sauce, whipped cream and mint. I put them in fancy tall wine glasses so they can see the layers, and it works.every.time.

Serves: 4

Ingredients:

  • 6 oz fruit and nut granola
  • 12 T natural plain full fat yogurt
  • 1 c. Your choice of fruit: sliced strawberries, blueberries, bananas etc.
  • Chocolate or caramel topping that you use for ice cream
  • Ready Whipped Cream in a spray bottle
  • 4 Sprigs of fresh mint

Directions:

Layer ingredients as shown and top with mint!

yogurt parfait

parfaits

Yogurt and Granola Parfait Sundays

My teen daughter has... not one, not two but...three girlfriends staying over for summer vacation and it's been hard to get them to eat a healthy breakfast. This is by far the most decadent of all of my recipes, but a sure fire way to get any sleepy breakfast-rebelling child to eat! A Yogurt and Granola Parfait Sunday topped with fruit, caramel or chocolate sauce, whipped cream and mint. I put them in fancy tall wine glasses so they can see the layers, and it works.every.time.

Ingredients
  

  • 6 oz fruit and nut granola
  • 12 T natural plain full fat yogurt
  • 1 c. Your choice of fruit: sliced strawberries blueberries, bananas etc.
  • Chocolate or caramel topping that you use for ice cream
  • Ready Whipped Cream in a spray bottle
  • 4 Sprigs of fresh mint

Instructions
 

  • Layer ingredients as shown and top with mint!

Notes

Serves: 4

lemon almond cake

Lemon Almond Cake with Cashew Cream- Sugar, Wheat and Dairy Free

We were having friends over for Midsummer’s Day and wanted to create the most perfect guilt-free, healthy summer cake possible- so here it is! The base is a pretty dense single layer almond flour, shortbread style cake. You only need one layer of this cake because it becomes like a very filling marzipan. I found it best to use the spring-form pan to remove the cake when it’s finished but if you don’t have a spring form pan make sure to grease and flour it before you put the batter in. The cashew butter coconut cream frosting is incomparably delectable and all of this is dairy free, wheat free and sugar-free! Be careful when using monkfruit sweetener it’s about 200-400x sweeter than sugar, and some may like to omit it from the frosting. If you have an herb garden or fresh herbs from the market, top with fresh summer springs of mint!

Almond Shortbread Cake

Ingredients:

• 1 1/2 cups almond flour- superfine (not almond meal)
• 4 large organic eggs separated
• 1/2 cup water
• 1/2 cup granulated monk fruit sugar
• 1 T lemon zest
• 2 T lemon juice
• Sliced berries, mint and thin lemon slices for topping

Instructions:

• Preheat the oven 350F. Well grease and flour a spring-form or 9-inch cake pan.
• In a mixing bowl, combine the almond flour, egg yolks, sweetener, and lemon zest, and mix well. In a separate bowl, beat together your egg whites until there are stiff peaks.
• Gently combine the two and transfer the cake mixture into the greased cake pan.
• Bake the cake for about 30 minutes, until it slightly browns on top. Let the cake cool for 15 minutes before removing from pan, as the shortbread tends to stick. Spring-forms work best and you can slide a knife under before removing.

Cashew and Coconut Cream Frosting

Ingredients:

• 1 stick of vegan butter softened
• 1 tsp. vanilla extract
• 3T cashew butter
• 2 tsp. monkfruit sugar
• 1/2 can- 6oz- 200ml full fat coconut milk cream (use the fatty part)

Instructions:

• Add softened vegan butter to a large mixing bowl and use an electric mixer to cream butter until it whips add vanilla and mix once more to combine.
• Add monkfruit sugar until well combined and fluffy.
• If too thick, add 1T at a time of the remaining coconut milk of it too thin, add 1tsp of almond flour at a time to thicken. The texture should be similar to a buttercream frosting.
• Refrigerate when done for 1 hour before spreading on cooled cake.
• Spread on cooled cake and decorate with berries, mint and the remaining lemon, sliced!

lemon almond cake

Lemon Almond Cake with Cashew Cream- Sugar, Wheat and Dairy Free

We were having friends over for Midsummer's Day and wanted to create the most perfect guilt-free, healthy summer cake possible- so here it is! The base is a pretty dense single layer almond flour, shortbread style cake. You only need one layer of this cake because it becomes like a very filling marzipan. I found it best to use the spring-form pan to remove the cake when it's finished but if you don't have a spring form pan make sure to grease and flour it before you put the batter in. The cashew butter coconut cream frosting is incomparably delectable and all of this is dairy free, wheat free and sugar-free! Be careful when using monkfruit sweetener it's about 200-400x sweeter than sugar, and some may like to omit it from the frosting. If you have an herb garden or fresh herbs from the market, top with fresh summer springs of mint!

Ingredients
  

  • 1 1/2 cups almond flour- superfine not almond meal
  • 4 large organic eggs separated
  • 1/2 c water
  • 1/2 cup granulated monk fruit sugar
  • 1 tbsp lemon zest
  • 2 T lemon juice
  • Sliced berries mint and thin lemon slices for topping

Instructions
 

  • Preheat the oven 350F. Well grease and flour a spring-form or 9-inch cake pan.
  • In a mixing bowl, combine the almond flour, egg yolks, sweetener, and lemon zest, and mix well. In a separate bowl, beat together your egg whites until there are stiff peaks.
  • Gently combine the two and transfer the cake mixture into the greased cake pan.
  • Bake the cake for about 30 minutes, until it slightly browns on top. Let the cake cool for 15 minutes before removing from pan, as the shortbread tends to stick. Spring-forms work best and you can slide a knife under before removing.

Notes

Cashew and Coconut Cream Frosting
Ingredients:
• 1 stick of vegan butter softened
• 1 tsp vanilla extract
• 3T cashew butter
• 2 tsp. monkfruit sugar
• 1/2 can- 6oz- 200ml full fat coconut milk cream (use the fatty part)
Instructions:
• Add softened vegan butter to a large mixing bowl and use an electric hand mixer  to cream butter until it whips add vanilla and mix once more to combine.
• Add monkfruit sugar until well combined and fluffy.
• If too thick, add 1T at a time of the remaining coconut milk of it too thin, add 1tsp of almond flour at a time to thicken. The texture should be similar to a buttercream frosting.
• Refrigerate when done for 1 hour before spreading on cooled cake.
• Spread on cooled cake and decorate with berries, mint and the remaining lemon, sliced!
christian

Dawn Boiani-Sandberg (Then I was Dawn Fiske) getting baptized at 10 by the Bishop, Emmanuel Church, Newport, RI

When I was 9, I joined the Episcopal Church in Newport, Rhode Island. This was my own decision, as I was close friends with some kind neighbors who invited me, who would later become my godparents, who I still keep in touch with today. My parents thought it was a bit odd, as they were quintessential 80’s somewhat self absorbed “yuppies,” and not really into religion. I became very involved with the church, went to Sunday school, community events and even joined the bell choir where we’d have to come to church to practice twice a week. I felt so much love and sincere kindness from this community, and it gave me hope and solace from a rather unsavory family life.

christian

Choir Girls from Emmanuel Church, Newport RI circa 1980- That’s me third row- second to last on the right

As far back as I remember as a small child, I was always pretty religious or maybe hedging more toward spiritual. Every morning I would wake up and pray into space and thank “God” or the universe, for another day of life. It was kind of strange in retrospect because my parents didn’t really talk to me about god or religion but somehow there was this innate knowing or belief or maybe just hope- that we were connected to something vast, greater and it was intelligent and compassionate.

I felt completely at home and enriched by my connection to this Episcopalian Community. They became the center of my life. I was impressed by how sincerely kind and compassionate people were as well as socially altruistic. We would raise money to sponsor children in developing countries, have bake sales, parties, trips to the beach, talent shows- arts and crafts- volunteer for those in need-  in or out of the community; it was a full and rich life.

Later on, when I left Newport and went to boarding school in Massachusetts, I started to read about all of the world religions and go deeper into religious philosophy and introspection. That’s where I found the Tibetan Book of the Dead and that pretty much sealed my fate for the next 25 years. Tibetan Buddhism seemed to offer a very complex, detailed system of how the world was structured and a deep understanding of the human mind. It provided a yogic path of inner development- for us to actually make spiritual progress that was beyond just doctrine or faith. As soon as I could, when I was 19, I packed everything up moved to Boulder, Colorado to go to a Buddhist University, The Naropa Institute- to study meditation, Tibetan art and tantric yogic methods.

Looking for a Spiritual Path

We talked so much about benefiting the world, cultivating compassion and a bold vision of creating an enlightened society. The premise of the community was that if you developed yourself and cultivated qualities of calmness, wisdom and sharpened the skills of your human efficacy that you could actually attain enlightenment and at that point, constantly offer yourself to benefit others. We were told that we had  exceedingly fortunate lives, good karma from our past lives and that our task was to take a vow to be of service to our world. There were some heartfelt moments with one of my teachers, and some powerful experiences on retreats, and for these memories I am grateful. I followed all of their training diligently for many years, but noticed in myself and others that these qualities as promised were not emerging even though I performed all of their practices and studied.

During our covid isolation we’ve all had a lot of time to reflect on our life and what is meaningful to us. After the #Metoo movement, many organizations, religious and secular, were exposed for having unethical conduct and scandals behind the scenes, not just in Christianity, but in Buddhism too. What got exposed in our Tibetan Buddhist community worldwide, was pretty unsettling to say the least. We found out that teachers abused their roles of power and control and unquestioning trust and devotion, to take sexual liberties with their students of both genders, forced us to give money and property, swear us to secrecy under something called secret conduct, use violence regularly that’s what they called a “teaching method.” If anyone speaks out, expresses hurt, concern or doubt, they send out henchmen to silence, discredit and slander whistleblowers- basic cult and organized crime modus operandi. They collect small children as early as the age of six from families and ordain them into their monastic institutions worldwide, where children and teens are to this day, subject to daily, violent physical and sexual assault. The teachers in power all know and turn a blind eye, while they give daily talks about compassion and non-harming. That’s just a small snippet the problems with my beloved faith of refuge and solace.

Taking Care of Each Other

During the year where we were in isolation I actually caught Covid, and there were only two people from my Buddhist community of 10k, that called to check on me, offered to help or expressed any care. It reminded me of a few years ago when I was also concerned about my mom who had breast cancer and I was worried about myself too. Our main teacher here in Boulder, who we are to regard as a divine, enlightened “Buddha,” was performing a four day obstacle removing practice. I remember I was so worried about her and I reached out to my Buddhist community, the leader of a large dharma center and I asked if I could just come and practice with my teacher for an hour. They said to me curtly “the only people that are welcome are the people that are his closest students.” They have a graded, hierarchical system of who’s who, and I had little value. They couldn’t even be kind to offer any words of comfort, support and encouragement- it was just a back-handed slap, telling me that I meant nothing. I tried for years to lobby them to create healthy community, take care of each other, uphold ethics and relational resolution; but nope, they consider anyone who requests transparency and change to be “possessed by a demon or evil,” yes I’m not kidding.

The majority of the proceeds from our donations and attention are not on each other, helping the underprivileged etc. but were used to serve the teacher and uphold his royal, jetset, mansions, court lifestyle. This was the first time that I realized that this indeed, is NOT a spiritual community, they were not the spokespeople for enlightened society, they didn’t even have the basic entry level etiquette skills of human decency. My husband commented “most of your dharma friends don’t seem to be well at all, it seems like a narcissist training camp.”

I live in a town, chock filled with self-involved Buddhists who took vows of altruism, yet when in need, they don’t take care of each other if we are sick or dying. Older students who aren’t popular, noted teachers or major donors, are literally left for dead, alone.

The hurt and hypocrisy to me personally, as well as so many lives, has caused me to step back, start fresh and reevaluate what community, faith and what the religious “path” means to me. What do I need, what can really help me to grow and use this short life for something meaningful? I had to seek out religious trauma counselors and shed many tears about the hurt and betrayal of our spiritual leaders as well as the unkindness and callousness of a lot of people who I considered trusted friends. The Tibetan Buddhist community that I was involved with since 19, is falling apart now, they are hemorrhaging with a loss of funding and membership after these scandals, and this trend is global.

It’s About Kindness

So, a few months ago, out of nostalgia, longing and being community-less, I started to join some of the online zoom sessions with a local Episcopalian Church, that just happens to be right by my home. I met with their Reverend, Rev. Bruce Swinehart and he was very kind. I told them about all of my tears and woes, feelings of deep, core spiritual betrayal. This little tiny Episcopalian Church in our neighborhood raised one million dollars during our covid isolation toward building renovations. He also told me that the parish raises money to provide temporary housing to support immigrants and those seeking asylum who were stopped at the border by the Trump administration. He told me that their community is pretty tight knit, if someone in the community gets ill there’s a group of people that will check on them and bring casseroles to the family or when community members are in need. If there’s a couple struggling with their marriage or a teen in trouble, the priest meets with them for spiritual counseling. The clergy did not behave as holier than thou, inaccessible or untouchable, they want to help. What a difference between this community and my former “enlightened society!”

Here are some photos from the outdoor Sunday church, from Saint Mary Magdalene’s Episcopal Church where the bishop was there to offer communion. They sang a song about diversity and the voices of the LGBT population and talked about constant forgiveness, healing our broken hearts and world, and real love. I was moved. Everyone greeted and some hugged each other at the end. This warmth and benevolent aspiration is the magic of real human dharma.

Is my story the quintessential heroic journey where Dorothy goes on this elaborate, long, gold gilded path to encounter this fantastic giant faux authoritarian deity with magic, smoke and mirrors and then finds that everything that she needed she had already in her own backyard within her? Well no, that would be too simple and easy. I’m not willing to relinquish my investment of my 25 years in the belief system of my Buddhist tradition, one of my teachers who was always kind and some of the powerful meditation practices that I still perform today. My concern and aspiration simply pertains to community, ethics, viability and what it really means to create real love.

If you use your religion as a way to build yourself up and think that you’re superior, are arrogant, profit financially, use your tradition to sexually exploit and control others, or justify any intention or action of harm whatsoever, this is no less than the depth of human obscuration and what could be called- “evil.” Retribution and cruelty to others is not “protecting one’s faith,” hurting others, especially children is dead wrong and it doesn’t matter what you call yourself priest, monk, Catholic, Buddhist, there are universal, basic human ethical truisms.

It’s Not About The Outer Form

There’s a famous story of the Buddha’s tooth, where a woman reportedly attained enlightenment. She had so much devotion and faith that she had a relic of a dog’s tooth that she believed was from the original Buddha on her shrine and that inspired her to meditate fervently and become a compassionate person. It doesn’t matter if you are theist, non-theists, an atheist it doesn’t matter whatsoever, what outer form or methodology, practice, what doctrine you ascribed to- it comes to one thing and one thing only, are we kind? Do we treat each other with decency and respect? Do we care for each other when we are aging and ill? Do we use this life to learn and grow, be accountable for our mistakes and feel regret and vow to not harm? This is the essence of the spiritual path, the real Dharma, the real enlightened society, the real God or sacredness within. If you have a heart of kindness~ that is… everything.

Homemade Spearmint Tooth Powder

This easy to make home tooth powder makes my teeth feel very clean, white and polished! This is a modified recipe from my first peppermint tooth powder with the addition now of bentonite clay and xylitol. I love to continually perfect new recipes and the previous tooth powder cleaned well, but tended to be very salty and gritty. This this one now, is very minty and sweet and I look forward to brushing. Take all ingredients and blend them until the power is very fine, like flour and there should be little risk to enamel or gums. This recipe if used 1x a week, should last about 1/2 a year! Store in a glass container or covered container.

Ingredients:

• 1/2 c. Bentonite Clay (1 part)
• 1/2 c. Baking Soda (1 part)
• 1/4 c. Himalayan Sea Salt (1/2 part)
• 2 T Xylitol, Stevia or Monkfruit Sugar
• 2 tsp. of Spearmint Essential Oil

Directions:

Take all ingredients and blend in a blender until very, very fine, stir and blend again. Make sure that the sea salt is no longer course, it should look like course flour.

When you use it, first pour a little Hydrogen Peroxide onto your toothbrush to wet, then dip in powder and brush, brush the tongue too.

Use 1x/week as a polish and antibacterial cleanse to compliment regular daily paste brushing.

toothpowder 1

Homemade Spearmint Tooth Powder

This easy to make home tooth powder makes my teeth feel very clean, white and polished! This is a modified recipe from my first peppermint tooth powder with the addition now of bentonite clay and xylitol. I love to continually perfect new recipes and the previous tooth powder clean well, but tended to be very salty and gritty. This this one now, is very minty and sweet and I look forward to brushing. Take all ingredients and blend them until the power is very fine, like flour and there should be little risk to enamel or gums. This recipe if used 1x a week, should last about 1/2 a year! Store in a glass container or covered container.

Ingredients
  

  • 1/2 c. Bentonite Clay 1 part
  • 1/2 c. Baking Soda 1 part
  • 1/4 c. Himalayan Sea Salt 1/2 part
  • 2 T Xylitol Stevia or Monkfruit Sugar
  • 2 tsp. of Spearmint Essential Oil

Instructions
 

  • Take all ingredients and blend in a blender until very, very fine, stir and blend again. Make sure that the sea salt is no longer course, it should look like course flour.
  • When you use it, first pour a little Hydrogen Peroxide onto your toothbrush to wet, then dip in powder and brush, brush the tongue too.
  • Use 1x/week as a polish and antibacterial cleanse to compliment regular daily paste brushing.

 

Organic Dairy Free Potato Salad

How To Make The VERY Best Potato Salad Recipe. The base is my grandma’s recipe and I use organic vegetables and vegan mayo- and it’s hands down the best potato salad- ever. We have our very first urban homestead herb garden this year, so the parsley is fresh from the garden! This is a perfect side dish for every summer outdoor barbecue or gathering, and now that we are vaccinated we can finally have dear friends and family over. We tried the vegetarian Beyond Burgers on the grill and they cooked up really well, add a fresh salad and some light, cool rosé wine and you have a perfect event- enjoy!

Ingredients:

3 pounds Organic Yukon Gold or Organic Russet Potatoes peeled and chopped to 3/4″ squares
1.5 cups Veganaise or Hellman’s Vegan Dressing
8 small sweet pickles chopped or 2T sweet pickle relish
2 tablespoons organic yellow mustard
5 celery stalks washed and diced
8 hard boiled eggs peeled
1/2 organic white onion diced
2 T fresh chopped parsley for garnish
1/2 teaspoon paprika
Salt and pepper to taste

Instructions:

  1. Cut the potatoes into squares and place them in a large stockpot, add 1 tablespoon salt and cook the potatoes for 15 minutes, until fork tender. Do not overcook.
  2. Meanwhile, in a medium bowl chop the eggs until fine with a hand pasty blender or two knives crossed. Add the veganaise, pickles, celery, 1 teaspoon salt, and pepper to taste. Stir until smooth.
  3. Once the potatoes are tender, drain and let cool.
  4. When cool, stir in the egg and veganaise mixture. Taste, then salt and pepper as needed. Garnish with parsley and paprika.
  5. Cover the potato salad and refrigerate. Serve Cold.

Dairy Free Potato Salad

Dairy Free Potato Salad

Organic Dairy Free Potato Salad

How To Make The VERY Best Potato Salad Recipe. The base is my grandma's recipe and I use organic vegetables and vegan mayo- and it's hands down the best potato salad ever. We have our very first urban homestead herb garden this year, so the parsley is fresh from the garden!

Ingredients
  

  • 3 pounds Organic Yukon Gold or Organic Russet Potatoes peeled and chopped to 3/4" squares
  • 1.5 cups Veganaise or Helleman's Vegan Dressing
  • 8 small sweet pickles chopped or 2T sweet pickle relish
  • 2 tablespoons organic yellow mustard
  • 5 celery stalks washed and diced
  • 8 hard boiled eggs peeled
  • 1/2 organic white onion diced
  • 2 T fresh chopped parsley for garnish
  • 1/2 teaspoon paprika
  • Salt and pepper to taste

Instructions
 

  • Meanwhile, in a medium bowl chop the eggs until fine with a hand pasty blender or two knives crossed. Add the veganaise, pickles, celery, 1 teaspoon salt, and pepper to taste. Stir until smooth.
  • Once the potatoes are tender, drain and let cool.
  • When cool, stir in the egg and veganaise mixture. Taste, then salt and pepper as needed. Garnish with parsley and paprika.
  • Cover the potato salad and refrigerate. Serve Cold.

My family and I used to travel to California every year and stop in an old Spanish missionary town called San Juan Capistrano, outside of San Diego. There is the oldest and best restaurant there where I called them later and asked for their authentic fresh table-side guacamole recipe. A fresh, cooling summer treat, we just love this!

If you can ever visit this town please do, this restaurant site has been recognized as a California State Historical Landmark. The northern section was originally the home of Miguel Yorba Adobe, built in 1797. The southern half housed the Juzgado (court and jails), so it used to be a jail- and was established in 1812. Visit if you ever can, it’s an amazing cultural experience with an old Mission Church and botanical garden right next door.

https://eladobedecapistrano.com/catering/las-flores-room/

Spanish Guacamole from Mission San Juan Capistrano

Prep Time:
10 mins
Total Time:
10 mins

mexican guacamole

Ingredients:

  • 3-4 ripe organic avocados, not too mushy not too hard
  • 1/2 red onion finely chopped
  • 2 fresh jalapenos finely chopped
  • cilantro for garnish
  • 2 T of fresh squeezed lime juice
  • salt and pepper to taste
  • 2 organic Roma tomato finely chopped
  • 3 cloves of garlic minced

Instructions:

  1. Cut the avocados in 1/2 and remove the core, scoop out into a bowl
  2. Mash the avocado with a large fork or hand pastry blender
  3. Add the onion, jalapeno and tomato and gently mix well
  4. Add lime juice and salt and pepper to taste
  5. Top with cilantro and serve with organic corn chips made from real Mexican style tortillas!

authentic mexican guacamole

home made guac

Spanish Guacamole from Mission San Juan Capistrano

My family and I used to travel to California every year and stop in an old Spanish missionary town called San Juan Capistrano, outside of San Diego. There is the oldest and best restaurant there where I called them later and asked for their authentic fresh tableside guacamole recipe.

Ingredients
  

  • 4 ripe organic avocados not too mushy not too hard
  • 1/2 red onion finely chopped
  • 2 fresh jalapenos finely chopped
  • cilantro for garnish
  • 2 T of fresh squeezed lime juice
  • salt and pepper to taste
  • 2 organic roma tomato finely chopped
  • 3 cloves of garlic minced
  • Instructions:
  • Peel the avocados and remove the core

Instructions
 

  • Peel the avocados and remove the core
  • Mash the avocado with a large fork or hand pastry blender
  • Add the onion, jalapeno and tomato and gently mix well
  • Add lime juice and salt and pepper to taste
  • Top with cilantro and serve with organic corn chips made from real Mexican style tortillas!

Photo by Karolina Grabowska from Pexels

Sangchö or Lha Sang, A Tibetan Native Smoke Offering Ceremony

I was at my home in Boulder instead of my retreat home this weekend and invited an old dharma friend over to perform a traditional smoke purification ceremony, borrowed from the Tibetan Bön/ Buddhist Tradition. In traditional shamanistic culture, it’s very common to gather outside by the fire, to connect to nature, the elements and each other. The smoke is said to purify, to burn away obstacles in our lives and has a way of immediately connecting to our ancestral sacredness. We start by sitting silently and then we recite a traditional prayer composed by Dudjom Rinpoche. As the smoke billows, you imagine clearing a new path for that month, and anything you wish to let go of or create, can be part of your aspiration, and you lightly imagine that nature “listens.” We offer fresh juniper dipped in water, that I am fortunate to have plenty of growing on my property, as well as bourbon and aromatic woods. Other substances like ground barley tsampa flour are often offered as well.

We use a little backyard chiminea, that’s placed in a fire-proof simple Japanese rock garden, where I put at little pagoda too, to act like a sacred reliquary garden stupa. It’s a powerful, healing practice that you can do on special days like the full moon, equinox or solstice. Just make sure that you don’t start an uncontrolled fire on high risk days, and that your county/ city allows chimineas! We also make sure to clear any tree branches above to be safe from fire, and douse fully when we are done. I’m including the traditional smoke offering text we use, if your dharma friends want to perform their own, it’s generally “secret” but if you are connected to this tradition, this is the best text to use, you can download it here:

https://lhaseylotsawa.org/texts/Riwo-Sangcho.pdf

Homemade Peppermint Tooth Powder with Baking Soda and Sea Salt

This recipe was given to me by my healthful, mountain yogi friend who uses it every day. I have read that brushing with sea salt and tooth powders can damage enamel, but I found a way to use this amazing cleaning recipe safely. Take all ingredients and blend them until the power is very fine, like flour and there should be little risk to enamel or gums. I use this 1x a week rather than every day as a special cleansing paste. Some recipes call for 1 part bentonite clay powder, but this works really well without that. This recipe if used 1x a week, should last about 1/2 a year! Store in a glass container or covered container.

Ingredients:

1/2 c. Baking Soda (1 part)
1/4 c. Himalayan Sea Salt (1/2 part)
50-75 Drops of Essential Oils like: Peppermint, Spearmint, Clove, Tea-tree, Eucalyptus or Cinnamon, blends are ok!

Directions:

Take all ingredients and blend in a blender until very, very fine, stir and blend again. Make sure that the sea salt is no longer course, it should look like course flour.

When you use it, first pour a little Hydrogen Peroxide onto your toothbrush to wet, then dip in powder and brush, brush the tongue too.

Use 1x/week as a polish and antibacterial cleanse to compliment regular daily paste brushing.

 

 

An intimate photo of my teeth after the tooth powder cleanse, quite shiny and white- Proof that it works!

IMG 4055

Homemade Peppermint Tooth Powder with Baking Soda and Sea Salt

This recipe was given to me by my healthful, mountain yogi friend who uses it every day. I have read that brushing with sea salt and tooth powders can damage enamel, but I found a way to use this amazing cleaning recipe safely. Take all ingredients and blend them until the power is very fine, like flour and there should be little risk to enamel or gums. I use this 1x a week rather than every day as a special cleansing paste. Some recipes call for 1 part bentonite clay powder, but this works really well without that. This recipe if used 1x a week, should last about 1/2 a year! Store in a glass container or covered container.

Ingredients
  

  • 1/2 c. Baking Soda 1 part
  • 1/4 c. Himalayan Sea Salt 1/2 part
  • 50-75 Drops of Essential Oils like: Peppermint Spearmint, Clove, Tea-tree, Eucalyptus or Cinnamon, blends are ok!

Instructions
 

  • Take all ingredients and blend in a blender until very, very fine, stir and blend again. Make sure that the sea salt is no longer course, it should look like course flour.
  • When you use it, first pour a little Hydrogen Peroxide onto your toothbrush to wet, then dip in powder and brush, brush the tongue too.
  • Use 1x/week as a polish and antibacterial cleanse to compliment regular daily paste brushing.

 

 

 

I don’t have central AC in my homes, and even if so, the grid may give out for awhile so we have to prepare and stay safe from heat exhaustion or stroke – here are some great tips to stay cool during this heat wave!

1. Stay out of sun, stay in shade or indoors during high heat hours.
2. Strip down and get wet!
3. Take it easy, rest, read, during the higher heat hours.
4. Take a cold shower or bath.
5. Use Dr. Bronner’s peppermint soap/scrub for colder showers.
6. Use cold washrags on your neck or wrists and heat points.
7. Stay Hydrated! Drink lots and lots of cold water.
8. Freeze bananas and berries for a cooling dessert/ snacks.
9. Use box and oscillating fans.
10. Invest in an attic or whole house fan (we did this, amazing!)
11. Close your curtains or blinds, block out sun.
12. Sleep in breathable linens and a get a cooling gel pillow.
13. Sleep in the basement or lower level if you have one.
14. Close the doors of unused rooms.
15. Strategically Angle Fans (in living space-heat in/out).
16. Install Ceiling Fans.
17. Use Some Ice and Fans to Cool Things Down.
18. Use Portable Evaporative Coolers.
19. Keep Appliances Off.
20. Prep Meals and cook in the morning, with a slow cooker or outside on a grill.

 

Copy credit in part:

Photo by murat esibatir from Pexels

KEBAB  ✓ No attribution required.

Well, the first thing I’d like to say if you suspect that you may have mental illness or a personality disorder or you have gotten an official diagnosis is… don’t panic! The fact that you’re here reading articles like this or seeking therapeutic help is rare. Self awareness and treatment is invaluable for people who suffer with personality disorders and it’s a huge step forward to even begin to see that one needs help. Congratulations are in order! I do not purport to be a psychologist, I have a bachelor’s degree in psychology and have worked as a mental health counselor and wellness coach. More than training, I have been the recipient of narcissistic abuse for the good part of my life from my primary relationships. As a survivor and hopeful thriver, I have a lot of first hand experience with the dynamics of relational abuse and have encountered many modalities for healing, that I’d like to share.

Compassion for All

A lot of the self-help books and trainings and even therapists are geared toward helping the people who are the recipients of abuse. However, I’m finding that there’s not a whole lot out there to help people if they find out that they themselves have a personality disorder. Many professionals and online forums consider people who are narcissists, or people to suffer from antisocial personality disorder (psychopathy) to be wholly dysfunctional, predatory and conscienceless. Many therapists refuse to work with deeply rooted untreated personality disorders like borderline as the borderline can be emotionally manipulative and harmful, even to the therapist. They talk at great length about cutting people out, no contact, boundaries from “toxic people” and how to walk away.

One of my Buddhist teachers in contrast said, the people that are unwell, hurt, angry and reactive are the ones that need our love the most. I still love the disordered person that is in my family, I know they will never seek treatment. Yet, I see their past, their trauma that caused them to become like this: reactive, rageful and never, ever admitting fault, it’s always everyone else’s issue and they are the poor victims of mistreatment. Inside, they are broken, hollow and alone. Education is the key, for me to be able to create a safe environment to be around this family member. What they had to endure just being them, is enough “punishment” for their lifelong and continuous hurt to me. I’m grateful actually, to have been raised by a full spectrum narcissist and then to seek out a spiritual community headed by someone with a similar psychological profile. I admittedly struggle with being a wounded healer, codependency and care-taking as the fallout of my upbringing. However, they say “take it to the path,” the pain, many tears and years of therapeutic and healing modalities has I hope, caused me to grow and love even more deeply.

There is Hope

I would like to offer a different perspective on how people with personality disorders came to be and feel that if they were to ever seek help, no one is beyond redemption. I believe that no human being, even hardened criminals, even if they go so far as to identify as a predator, abusers who uphold the persona of the “wolf in sheep clothing” con men, gang members, people in political power, people that hold trusted roles as spiritual leaders but are exploitative and use people to glean sex, money, power, control and narcissistic supply, could not be treated and learn to uncover their innate dormant conscience and no longer harm others.

If the disorders that we experience come from: early childhood physical or sexual abuse, neglect, bullying, loss of a parent, growing up with a lot of intensity or trauma, then in order to survive, the child learns to dissociate and protect the vulnerable part of them from being hurt. As they age they perceive people who love them as people who are going to hurt them, a myriad of maladaptive, reactive, controlling or dissociated behaviors can ensue. Experts say often that the age that the abuse started is the age where the person stopped developing emotionally. Often you have people that are adults on the outside but yet broken, the “walking wounded” on the inside. This is not evil, this is sad, and we must safely help each other as much as we can, both “victim and perpetrator” in this hard and fragile life.

This organization, The Compassion Prison Project does a lot of work to help us all to be “trauma informed,” having compassion for unfortunate people that come from trauma and abuse that results in committing crimes. The project offers ways for us all to understand and heal, rather than mere punishment of doing years of time. I myself, used to volunteer in prisons and saw large, muscled, grown men, with tattoos, seemingly hardened, cry and express real regret. These images stay indelibly, with me.

Indeed, some people are born with neurological deficits which are the constructs of antisocial personality disorder, the traditional psychopaths or sociopaths. These are traditionally defined as people that are not capable of feeling real love, compassion, empathy or having any conscience. The statistics are staggering- 1 in 20 people are considered to be on the spectrum of antisocial personality disorder so there’s a very good chance that each of us encountered someone like this in our lives or… maybe ourselves? If you have been diagnosed with a personality disorder and you’re trying to seek help you are not too far gone to be considered un-treatable, then it’s time to take this very seriously and begin the process of self-awareness and healing right away as to not hurt yourself or others any more. The pain of living with untreated personality disorders can create a lonely and hollow life for the person that suffers from this and the impact on people’s family and social relationships can be devastating.

If you suspect you may have a personality disorder, first and foremost, I would adopt this mantra-

“I am a good person but through this illness, I have hurt myself and many people. I am so proud that now, I’m brave enough to see it, and will diligently seek help. I know I can get better and stop these negative recurring patterns. I will someday become a loving, healed and helpful person.”

Here are some helpful steps as to how to get treated:

 

 

  • If your doctor or therapist suggest medication take it diligently.

 

  • If you have problems with alcohol or substance abuse, go to detox, often covered by insurance and then join a supportive 12 Step Community.

 

  • Consider consulting with a Functional Medicine Doctor, there are many powerful OTC supplements that can help.

 

 

  • Journal– Make an extensive list about every single thing you have done to hurt others in your whole life prior to treatment and if possible, contact all of them to apologize, even if it has been decades.

 

  • Real Self Love– Forgive yourself for any harm you have done by acting out of the untreated personality disorder or mental illness.

 

  • Self Energy Work– Learn how to do reiki healings, EFT tapping or self care acupressure like Jinshin-jitsu, take regular warm baths, support, cradle and re-parent a taxed, damaged nervous and adrenal system.

 

  • Seek Emergency or therapeutic help if you uncover memories that are too painful or encounter any mental or emotional state that’s too much to handle alone, or if you have any desire to harm yourself or others.

 

  • As you get stronger and better and are in treatment, if you have committed crimes, you may choose to work with your counselor and contact a lawyer and turn yourself in and explain that you were mentally ill when committing them, and plea for a lesser sentence or a mental illness waiving of sentencing.

 

  • Make sure that you follow the law, always, there are no exceptions or special permissions for you. If you belong to a rebellious group of friends or religion that gives you special permissions to break the law and harm others, leave any unhealthy culture or organization that supports and enables disordered thinking.

 

  • Vow to be mindful of your body, speech and mind, notice if there’s a tendency to feel hurt, reactive rageful and when you notice this come up, take a deep calming abdominal breath, feel your body, look at the other person with kindness and start again.

 

  • A well balanced nutritive diet, daily exercise and sunlight are the basics of any human mind-body-spirit health!

 

  • Contrary to popular thought, I do not recommend meditation, solitary retreat, withdrawal or solitude for long periods of time or any high yogic practices until you have been treated and are stable and psychologically healthy.

 

  • Self Talk– believe that each day is new, each day is a new you, full of potential and renewed!

There is no shame in being diagnosed with any type of depression, bi-polar personality disorder or mental illness. (!) The statistics for us all collectively suffering after the past few years with the disasters, pandemic, loss of life, isolation and economy are all pervasive. I know it’s easier to be in denial, project and blame others, that’s how personality disorders keep their stronghold on those who suffer, but I trust that somewhere, people know when they are unwell and need help. We must remove the mental health stigma, get whatever help needed, to create the best life for ourselves. I love the mantra:

Hurt People Hurt People, Healed People Heal People

Taking steps toward our personal inner health- mind-body-spirit becomes the building blocks of a healthier society, families and spans into the next generations. There are so many amazing powerful and transformative healing resources out there. We can bring light to our shadow, and admit if we are in pain and we’ve hurt others and need help. We can take whatever steps we can to become the best, most healed people we can be! As long as we are still here, with faculties intact, there is always… hope.

Disclaimer

Disclaimer and Emergency Information

 

Disclaimer: Please do not use these articles as a way to diagnose yourself or others. These articles are for educational purposes and they are links, reposts and personal opinions of the author. If you relate to any content, we have a list of hotlines below that you or a loved one can use to seek help for abuse, trauma or mental health issues. Some content can cause “triggers” as sensitive content is discussed.

Resources: National Child Abuse Hotline (US and Canada): 800-4-A-CHILD (800-422-4453)

National Domestic Abuse Hotline: 800-799-SAFE (800-799-7233) TTY: 800-787-3224 Video Phone for Deaf Callers: 206-518-9361

National Suicide Prevention Lifeline: 800-273-TALK (800-273-8255) TTY: 800-799-4TTY (800-799-4889)

Crisis Text Line: Text HELLO to 741741 (US and Canada) or 85258 (UK) National Runaway Switchboard: 800-RUNAWAY (800-786-2929)

CODA https://coda.org/

 

https://www.pexels.com/photo/fashion-woman-notebook-pen-34072/

Photo by Alex Green from Pexels

Dawn Sandberg added 14 new photos — with John Horner and Greg Smith at The Great Stupa Of Dharmakaya.

We had a magnificent visit to see the stupa at Shambhala Mountain Center yesterday in Colorado, whose land was burned in the fires last year.  It was both hopeful and poignant to be there, fire and flowers. I spent over 2 years on that land and want to preserve it at all costs, and hope that all will heal well in the community over time. Please notice, the Kami Shrine, a temple built to honor the Shinto Sun Goddess Amaterasu, the fire burned close by on either side, her shrine all wooden, remained unscathed!

poblano pepper soup

Aztec Poblano Pepper Soup

Vegetarian Mexican Roasted Poblano Pepper and Jalapeno Soup

I used to visit Mexico every year and found this perfect, spicy, flavorful and hearty soup recipe. It’s reminiscent of ancient Mexico, and when I make it, I’m back there again, surrounded by colorful stone handcrafted architecture, woven bright textiles, drying peppers and sunshine. Some recipes call for the peppers to be skinned, but I always leave skins on, and the soup comes out really well.

Servings: 6

Ingredients:

  • 10 poblano peppers, medium
  • 5 jalapeno peppers
  • 1 large white onion peeled and chopped
  • 4 cloves garlic minced
  • 1 cup chopped fresh cilantro, reserve some for garnish
  • 1 teaspoon salt
  • 1 cup of 1/2 and 1/2
  • 1 teaspoon ground cumin
  • 50 oz- 1 and 1/2 cartons of vegetable broth
  • 14 ounces Mexican melting queso or monterey jack cheese
  • 1 teaspoon cornstarch
  • 1/2 c organic flour
  • 2T honey
  • 1 stick of vegan or regular butter
  • 1/2 tsp cayenne pepper

 

Instructions:

  1. Slice all peppers in 1/2 and remove seeds and stem.
  2. Preheat oven to 450 degrees.
  3. Roast Peppers on baking sheet until the skins starts to bubble, about 15 minutes.
  4. In a large stockpot, saute onions, garlic, cumin and salt in butter, then add vegetable stock.
  5. Add roasted peppers when they are ready and bring all to a boil.
  6. Whisk in crumbled cheese, 1/2 and 1/2, corn starch and flour, simmer for about 15 minutes.
  7. Blend all in a blender in sections and pour back into stockpot, reheat, top with cilantro and serve warm, with crusty bread and a fresh salad!

poblano pepper soup

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Aztec Poblano Pepper Soup

Vegetarian Mexican Roasted Poblano Pepper and Jalapeno Soup I used to visit Mexico every year and found this perfect, spicy, flavorful and hearty soup recipe. It's reminiscent of ancient Mexico, and when I make it, I'm back there again, surrounded by colorful stone handcrafted architecture, woven bright textiles, drying peppers and sunshine. Some recipes call for the peppers to be skinned, but I always leave skins on, and the soup comes out really well.

Ingredients
  

  • 10 poblano peppers medium
  • 5 jalapeno peppers
  • 1 large white onion peeled and chopped
  • 4 cloves garlic minced
  • 1 cup chopped fresh cilantro reserve some for garnish
  • 1 teaspoon salt
  • 1 teaspoon ground cumin
  • 50 oz 1 and 1/2 boxes of vegetable broth
  • 14 ounces Mexican Melting Queso or Monterey Jack
  • 1 teaspoon cornstarch
  • 1/2 c organic flour
  • 2 T honey
  • 1 stick of vegan or regular butter
  • 1/2 tsp cayenne pepper
  • 1 c 1/2 and 1/2

Instructions
 

  • Slice all peppers in 1/2 and remove seeds and stem.
  • Preheat oven to 450 degrees.
  • Roast Peppers on baking sheet until the skins starts to bubble, about 15 minutes.
  • In a large stockpot, saute onions, garlic, cumin and salt in butter, then add vegetable stock.
  • Add roasted peppers when they are ready and bring all to a boil.
  • Whisk in crumbled cheese, 1/2 and 1/2, corn starch and flour, simmer for about 15 minutes.
  • Blend all in a blender in sections and pour back into stockpot, reheat, top with cilantro and serve warm, with crusty bread and a fresh salad!

Notes

Servings: 6
Photo by Alex Azabache from Pexels

Healthy Vegetable Lasagna with Zucchini and Ricotta

This is a veggie lasagna recipe, with ingredients sourced from Trader Joes, but any store with has no-prep lasagna noodles like Barilla and organic veggies will do! This lasagna is very quick, easy to assemble and it’s a family staple, and best when we can source tomatoes, basil and zucchini from the garden! The only pre-prep is to steam the broccoli and zucchini, and a quick blend with a blender or food processor.

This recipe takes many shortcuts, (pardon the non-zero waste prepackaging)- we use no-boil lasagna sheet noodles, prepared tomato sauce, ricotta, cottage cheese, and prepackaged shredded mozzarella and Parmesan cheese. All the ingredients go straight into the baking pan.

Ingredients:

• 1 (16 oz) box No Boil Lasagna Noodles
• 1 jar Tomato or Marinara Sauce (26 oz.)
• 1/2 head of broccoli, steamed, drained and chopped -or-
• 1 (16 oz) bag frozen chopped spinach, thawed or fresh, lightly chopped
• 2 small green zucchinis steamed, drained and sliced
• 16 oz shredded mozzarella
• 1 (16 oz) container Fresh Whole Milk Ricotta
• 1 (16 oz) container Small Curd Cottage Cheese
• 1 (12 oz bag) of shredded Parmesan cheese and a sprinkling of grated.
•  Fresh Basil garnish or dried Italian seasoning (optional)

 

Instructions:

• Preheat oven to 350° degrees F.
• Steam and chop the broccoli, and slice and steam the zucchini.
• Blend the steamed broccoli (or fresh or frozen thawed and drained spinach) and a blender or food processor.
• Stir broccoli or spinach into ricotta in a bowl with 1/4 t salt.
• Cover the bottom of an 8×12-inch or 9×13-inch baking dish with 1/2 cup tomato sauce or marinara.
• Put down one layer of noodles (I use 3 and 1/2 noodles for each layer).
• Spread the ricotta and broccoli on the noodles.
• Place another layer of noodles and sauce and mozzarella cheese.
• Spread container of ricotta cheese.
• Top with another layer of zucchini and Parmesan then a top layer of noodles, remaining sauce, and a dense layer of remaining mozzarella and Parmesan.
• Bake for about 50 minutes, until top is bubbling and melted. Top with basil or Italian seasoning. Let lasagna cool for a few minutes before serving.

Garnish with basil, and enjoy! Serves 6.

Vegetable-Lasagna

 

 

veggie-lasagna

 

trader joes lasagna

Healthy Vegetable Lasagna with Zucchini and Ricotta

This is a veggie lasagna recipe, with ingredients sourced from Trader Joes, but any store with has no-prep lasagna noodles like Barilla and organic veggies will do! This lasagna is very quick easy to assemble and it’s a family staple, and best when we can source tomatoes, basil and zucchini from the garden! The only pre-prep is to steam the broccoli and zucchini, and a quick blend with a blender or food processor.This recipe takes many shortcuts, (pardon the non-zero waste prepackaging)- we use no-boil lasagna sheet noodles, prepared tomato sauce, ricotta, cottage cheese, and prepackaged shredded mozzarella and Parmesan cheese. All the ingredients go straight into the baking pan.

Equipment

  • blender or food processor

Ingredients
  

  • 1 16 oz box No Boil Lasagna Noodles
  • 1 jar Tomato or Marinara Sauce 26 oz.
  • 1/2 head of broccoli steamed, drained and chopped -or-
  • 1 16 oz bag frozen chopped spinach, thawed or fresh, lightly chopped
  • 2 small green zucchinis steamed drained and sliced
  • 16 oz shredded mozzarella
  • 1 16 oz container Fresh Whole Milk Ricotta
  • 1 16 oz container Small Curd Cottage Cheese
  • 1 12 oz bag of shredded Parmesan cheese and a sprinkling of grated.
  • Fresh Basil garnish optional

Instructions
 

  • Preheat oven to 350° degrees F.
  • Steam and chop the broccoli, and slice and steam the zucchini.
  • Blend the steamed broccoli (or fresh or frozen thawed and drained spinach) and a blender or food processor.
  • Stir broccoli or spinach into ricotta in a bowl with 1/4 t salt.
  • Cover the bottom of an 8×12-inch or 9×13-inch baking dish with 1/2 cup tomato sauce or marinara.
  • Put down one layer of noodles (I use 3 and 1/2 noodles for each layer).
  • Spread the ricotta and broccoli on the noodles.
  • Place another layer of noodles and sauce and mozzarella cheese.
  • Spread container of ricotta cheese.
  • Top with another layer of zucchini and Parmesan then a top layer of noodles, remaining sauce, and a dense layer of remaining mozzarella and Parmesan.
  • Bake for about 50 minutes, until top is bubbling and melted. Let lasagna cool for a few minutes before serving.

Notes

Garnish with basil, and enjoy! Serves 6.

Photo by Anna Guerrero from Pexels

chai oatmeal

 

Chai Spiced Multigrain Oatmeal

A friend’s German grandfather lived until 102 and he ate warm oatmeal every morning. I like oats with a 7-Grain Cereal and whey power for added protein. A serving of this stick-to-your-ribs cereal is packed full of everything you need for an energizing morning. Our chai oatmeal is high in flax, fiber and protein, and rich in vitamins and minerals. Add any toppings, milk or sweetener you want, or enjoy plain with a simple austerity.

Ingredients:

  1. 1/4 c. Multigrain Hot Cereal
  2. 1/4 c. organic rolled oats
  3. 1 T. whey powder (optional)
  4. 1/2 t. cinnamon
  5. 1/2 t. cardamom
  6. pinch of salt

optional toppings: butter, bananas, raisins, nuts, berries, honey, oat or your preferred milk

Instructions:

• Bring 2 cups of salted water or your preferred milk to a boil.
• Add oats and multigrain cereal mix to water, stir.
• Turn off heat but keep pan on burner, covered.
• Let sit, until water is absorbed and grains are soft; about 10 minutes.
• Finish with your favorite toppings.

Serves 2

 

IMG 3796

Chai Spiced Multigrain Oatmeal

A friend's German grandfather lived until 102 and he ate oatmeal every morning. I like oats with a 7-Grain Cereal and whey power for added protein. A serving of this stick-to-your-ribs cereal is packed full of everything you need for a energizing morning. Our chai oatmeal is high in flax, fiber and protein, and rich in vitamins and minerals. Add any toppings, milk or sweetener you want, or enjoy with a simple austerity.

Equipment

  • optional toppings: butter, bananas, raisins, nuts, berries, honey, oat or your preferred milk

Ingredients
  

  • 1/4 c. Multigrain Hot Cereal
  • 1/4 c. organic rolled oats
  • 1 T. whey powder optional
  • 1/2 t. cinnamon
  • 1/2 t. cardamom
  • pinch of salt

Instructions
 

  • Bring 2 cups of salted water or your preferred milk to a boil.
  • Add oats and multigrain cereal mix to water, stir.
  • Turn off heat but keep pan on burner, covered.
  • Let sit, until water is absorbed and grains are soft; about 10 minutes.
  • Finish with your favorite toppings.

Notes

Serves 2

date truffles

Healthy Chocolate Date Truffles

These naturally sweet treats are… AMAZING! It seems like you can blend up whatever sweets and nuts you have around the house as long as the texture can be rolled into a ball and mixed with cocoa powder, leave them in fridge overnight to set. These are just as good, sweet, chocolaty and decadent as any real truffle!

Ingredients:

• 25 Medjool dates, pitted and soaked in warm water for 10 minutes
• 4 teaspoons pure vanilla extract
• 1/2 cup unsweetened cocoa powder
• 1 cup almond meal
• 1/2 cup of: peanuts, pecans, hazelnuts or sunflower seeds
• 1/2 cup of coconut oil
• Coatings: cocoa powder, shredded coconut, crushed hazelnuts or any other crushed nut

Instructions:

1. First soak dates them in warm to hot water for 15 minutes and then drain before putting into the food processor or quality large blade blender.
2. Put all of the above ingredients into the blender or food processor, blend slowly, and stop intermittently to ensure mixing until a thick oily “dough” ball is formed. You will have to scrape down the sides of the blender/food processor a few times to get all of the dry ingredients, or add a tad of water if it won’t blend. Once a dough is formed, scoop the dough (about 1 Tablespoon each) and roll into a smooth ball with your hands.
3. Roll into cocoa powder, coconut, and hazelnuts by spreading ingredients onto a plate and roll the moist dough balls around in a circle to fully cover. You can serve immediately, but they are best if refrigerated overnight. Store truffles in the refrigerator, they can keep up to a week.

healthy date balls

truffles

Healthy Chocolate Date Truffles

These naturally sweet treats are… AMAZING! It seems like you can blend up whatever sweets and nuts you have around the house as long as the texture can be rolled into a ball and mixed with cocoa powder, leave them in fridge overnight to set. These are just as good, sweet, chocolaty and decadent as any real truffle!

Ingredients
  

  • 25 Medjool dates pitted and soaked in warm water for 10 minutes
  • 4 teaspoon pure vanilla extract
  • 1/2 cup unsweetened cocoa powder
  • 1 cup almond meal
  • 1/2 cup peanuts pecans hazelnuts or sunflower seeds
  • 1/2 cup of coconut oil
  • Coatings: cocoa powder shredded coconut, crushed hazelnuts or any other crushed nut

Instructions
 

  • First soak dates them in warm water for 15 minutes and then drain before putting into the food processor or quality large blade blender.
  • Put all of the above ingredients into the blender or food processor, blend slowly, and stop intermittently to ensure mixing until a thick oily “dough” ball is formed. You will have to scrape down the sides of the blender/food processor a few times to get all of the dry ingredients, or add a tad of water if it won’t blend. Once a dough is formed, scoop the dough (about 1 Tablespoon each) and roll into a smooth ball with your hands.
  • Roll into cocoa powder, coconut, and hazelnuts by spreading ingredients onto a plate and roll the moist dough balls around in a circle to fully cover. You can serve immediately, but they are best if refrigerated overnight. Store truffles in the refrigerator, they can keep up to a week.

I found that Traditional Chinese Medicine was very effective in treating my severe case of Covid 19, very quickly. They have many ancient, proven effective herbs and remedies that act as an anti-virulent, as well as ones that target and strengthen certain organs and organ efficacy like lung function. Here is my personal experience and what helped, and in no way am I offering any professional medical advice, please always consult medical experts.

I went in for my first Pfizer vaccine, but my daughter had tested positive for Covid 19 a week before. I left the house when we were first diagnosed and went to a hotel suite alone, as to not catch it, as I was at higher risk than my husband as he is a few years younger. Sure enough, I started to get sicker and sicker and you may guess, after a year of vigilant quarantining, masks, Purell and social distancing, I was… Covid-19 positive.

Variants- A Warning from the Health Department

Everyone who tests positive for Covid 19 gets a call from the Public Health Dept. in Colorado for contact tracing and quarantine purposes. The counselor said part of why we are seeing a slight uptick with Covid cases on the rise in certain areas, is the new P.1 variant strain, which I did not have, thankfully. She was so sorry to report that even people who are fully vaccinated can get this (since like any annual flu shot, vaccines help to prevent, but these have only a 90% effective rate) or unvaccinated people who had Covid before might even get reinfected. What? I thought.

People are relaxing now with a false confidence when indeed we should not completely, as we see second waves worldwide. However, our national vaccine success helps to mitigate that possibility as long as we keep taking them and not be so afraid of the exceedingly rare side effects. I know it’s one dire thing after another these days, and we all wish it were different, but I beg everyone to remain super vigilant in public places for awhile longer and please please please, GET VACCINATED!!!! You do not want this virus, I barely survived it, even with no underlying condition!

To the Hospital after Fainting

I came home and my husband created a sealed quarantine room in the house. We sealed the room completely with tape and tarps torn from black contractor/ leaf bags so my husband would not become infected. We had a Hepa filter fan in the room and turned off the whole house fan as to not circulate the aerosols of the virus. I did not leave the room for any circumstance whatsoever and gratefully had an attached bath, windows with sunlight, a roof to sunbathe and a hot water heating element teapot. I had found an urgent vaccine appointment for my husband a few days before I returned home. I started to cough so hard that I was getting a mild concussion, and pushing on my pelvic floor, miserable. My fever was steady at about 101-102. I was very tired and my lungs were filling up quickly with congestion. I could not eat, barely sleep and had these coughing bouts, whooping and dizzying. My resting pulse ranged between 98-121, tachycardia, and I felt like it was a fight for each and every welcome breath. Even binge watching 57 hours of Downton Abbey and feeble attempts to meditate provided no solace.  At times, indeed I thought I might not make it, really- and had to fight for hope, for my very life.

Dawn in the hospital bed with an EEG test.

Do Not Suppress Cough or Mild Fever!

I went to the ER one morning after I nearly fainted, I began to not see or hear and almost called for an ambulance. It is only day 4 of my fever and symptoms. They did a CAT scan to rule out a blood clot, yet saw covid pneumonia in one of my lower lung lobes, with a “webbing” of infection spreading which can be fatal. My oxygen was at 90, BP ok, so they sent me home to recover. They gave me a breathing spirometer to increase lung capacity that I was supposed to take 10 deep breaths every hour. This was very powerful as the nurse said that it “pops” the infected nodes in the lungs and can prevent fatality. They did rule out anything really dangerous but was there for an hour and 1/2 in Boulder and the bill was over 18 thousand dollars! This is why we must cap medical costs, have transparency and not a for-profit system, criminal! The saline drip costs about $1.40 a bag and they billed me $1,187. Now my insurance paid most of this for me, but still, we need a not-for-profit system. I am however grateful to have access to privileged medical care, and would only wish for that same access to everyone, worldwide.

I bought a finger based O2 and pulse monitor to check every hour, and was told to return if my O2 got below 88 where we live at higher altitude.

I called the CDC and a tele-health nurse, and they told me to *allow the coughing and slight fever!*

If you think about it, what are the two ways that the body has any chance of successfully fighting viral pneumonia? That would be a fever and the ability to cough out and expel any type of infection in the lungs. This made complete sense to me so I decided to not take any cough suppressant, cough drops, Mucinex or fever reducer if my fever stayed under 103. I did find these powerful TheraBreath Zinc lozenges since Covid drys your whole respiratory system out. I wonder if so many people are dying because they try to suppress symptoms and go against the body’s own healing attempts, taking too much OTC medicine and lay flat where the pneumonia can take over?

Every other night I would break down and take two baby aspirin or some acetaminophen to get to sleep but never any ibuprofen because there have been a lot of fatalities with that particular medicine, and it’s never used in our home. There have been some studies that aspirin helps to mitigate severe symptoms and prevents blood clots. I’d have intense night sweats, altering from cold to hot and it was impossible to get comfortable and feel ok. I did prop some pillows up or sleep “prone” on the belly and that worked. I tried to connect and listen to my body I could actually feel the congestion in certain areas by consciously trying to move/ cough up lung congestion to help my immune system and its recovery. When I could I got up and walked around, and did some light yoga and some postural drainage. I took steam baths with a towel over the head, with Vicks or Thieves (eucalyptus, clove oil) and had a steam humidifier going on full blast in the room 24/7. I rubbed tiger balm on my chest, but could not smell a thing! I drank plenty of water, tons, diluted fruit juices and steaming ginger tea with honey every couple hours.  I forced myself to eat healthy foods that my husband prepared to rebuild my strength, and we even had Meals on Wheels come for a few days!

Traditional Chinese Medicine

I contacted a very well noted and respected acupuncturist, Doctor of Oriental medicine, Dr. Jake Fratkin, who has been perfecting a tested Covid formula from China for over a year and did a Zoom tele-medicine call. He prescribed these three tinctures, with a foundation of Minor Buplerum or Xiao Chai Hu Tang. The night, actually the hour where I started on this protocol along with Vitamin C, D, Zinc a food based multivitamin and amino acids, I began to recover, and did so very quickly thereafter. When I was feeling better, I’d go out of the window onto the rooftop and sunbathe, the fresh oxygenated air did wonders! It took about 8 full days to recover with no remaining fever, some cough remained for another week, but I stayed inside under the strictest of home quarantine for 10. My husband helped me with postural drainage and gently beating my back called percussion.  My husband did not get Covid, thankfully. I think it is amazing that TCM has so many protocols for antivirals!

 

 

Covid Fast Remedy Checklist

 

Here is my personal Covid checklist if God forbid anyone in my family gets this again:

  • Vitamin D, C, Zinc, Multivitamin, Amino Acids and if prescribed by a TCM Doctor, Chinese anti-virulence herbs
  • Diluted fruit juices, green juices like Kale and Cucumber fresh nutritive foods like soups, broth, protein, vegetables and watery fruit like kiwi and oranges
  • TheraBreath Zinc lozenges
  • Fresh or Powdered Ginger Tea with Honey, nonstop
  • Vics Vapo Rub, Tiger Balm or Eucalyptus based Essential Oils like Thieves (I make it myself) that they used during the Black Plague
  • A Neti Pot to moisten and clear nasal passages
  • A Room Humidifier
  • Acetaminophen (Tylenol) and Baby Aspirin
  • A Spirometer
  • An O2 and pulse monitor

 

Wellness wishes to all, I’m 98% recovered, and it’s been just over a month. Some reduced lung capacity and tiredness and some slight paresthesia, as covid can have odd residual effects, but indeed, I’m so very grateful to have overcome it and happy to be alive.  I have my second vaccine on Saturday and will take it without hesitation. My heart to all of the many lives lost and their families, the unbearable anguish of our time. Please everyone still stay safe, and moreso, please make every moment meaningful- love well, live with integrity and joy with such a magical, fleeting, colorful and beautiful world we have. ♥️

 

quinoa egg muffins

Quinoa Crust-less Quiche Tarts

About Quinoa:

Quinoa “grain” originated in the Andean region of northwestern South America and is a protein, dietary fiber, B vitamin rich plant from the amaranth family, that is actually an edible seed.

I raise urban hens and in the spring, they are laying now so many eggs, daily, more than we can eat. We give a dozen away per week to friends. It’s been great to craft so many high protein, vegetarian dishes, with some ingredients from our proud backyard homesteading!  (Read: The Backyard Homestead: Produce all the food you need on just a quarter acre.)

Medifast, Optavia and Weight Watcher’s Approved!

Our Quiche Tart “Muffins” are packed full of healthy ingredients like protein-rich quinoa, vegetables, and eggs. They’re Weight Watcher’s approved at 2 Points per tart, or as an Optavia fueling at slightly under 100 calories per muffin.

Quinoa Crust-less Quiche Tarts

Ingredients:

• 6 large eggs
• 2 cups of cooked organic quinoa
• 1 cup of grated cheddar cheese
• 1/2 teaspoon table salt
• 1/4 teaspoon black pepper
• 1/6 teaspoon (sprinkle) of cayenne pepper
• 1 ounce of chopped spinach
• 4 sliced Portobello mushrooms
• 1 large diced tomato or red pepper

Instructions:

• Set oven to 400 degrees.
• Boil 1 and 1/2 cups of quinoa= 2 cups cooked.
• Chop and dice all vegetables.
• Lightly coat a non-stick 12 muffin pan with non-stick olive oil spray.
• Crack eggs into a medium sized mixing bowl and whisk with an egg beater.
• Add cooked quinoa, cheese and stir all ingredients to combine.
• Pour quiche mixture evenly into muffin pan, filling each well about 2/3rds of the way.
• Place pan on the middle rack of the oven and bake for about 20 minutes, or until tarts puff up.
• Remove pan from oven and allow quiche tarts to cool in pan for 2-3 minutes, carefully remove with a large spoon.

quinoa muffin

IMG 3772

Quinoa Crust-less Quiche Tarts

About Quinoa: Quinoa "grain" originated in the Andean region of northwestern South America and is a protein, dietary fiber, B vitamin rich plant from the amaranth family, that is actually an edible seed. Medifast, Optavia and Weight Watcher’s Approved! Our Quiche Tart "Muffins" are packed full of healthy ingredients like protein-rich quinoa, vegetables, and eggs. They’re Weight Watcher’s approved at 2 Points per tart, or as an Optavia fueling at slightly under 100 calories per muffin.

Ingredients
  

  • 6 large eggs
  • 2 cups of cooked organic quinoa
  • 1 cup of grated cheddar cheese
  • 1/2 teaspoon table salt
  • 1/4 teaspoon black pepper
  • 1/6 teaspoon sprinkle of cayenne pepper
  • 1 ounce of chopped spinach
  • 4 sliced Portobello mushrooms
  • 1 large diced tomato or red pepper

Instructions
 

  • Set oven to 400 degrees.
  • Boil 1 and 1/2 cups of quinoa= 2 cups cooked.
  • Chop and dice all vegetables.
  • Lightly coat a non-stick 12 muffin pan with non-stick olive oil spray.
  • Crack eggs into a medium sized mixing bowl and whisk with an egg beater.
  • Add cooked quinoa, cheese and stir all ingredients to combine.
  • Pour quiche mixture evenly into muffin pan, filling each well about 2/3rds of the way.
  • Place pan on the middle rack of the oven and bake for about 20 minutes, or until tarts puff up.
  • Remove pan from oven and allow quiche tarts to cool in pan for 2-3 minutes, carefully remove with a large spoon.

Vegetarian Blue Cheese Soufflé with Non-dairy or Dairy Options

Ingredients:

• 4 tablespoons vegan butter
• 1/4 cup freshly grated Parmesan/vegan Parmesan cheese
• 1/4 cup plus 2 tablespoons all-purpose flour or soy flour
• 1 1/2 cups soy or oat milk
• 3/4 teaspoon salt
• 1/4 teaspoon cayenne
• 6 ounces fresh chopped organic spinach
• 6 oz chopped baby portobello mushrooms
• 8 large free range eggs, separated
• 8 ounces crumbled blue/vegan blue, Roquefort or Gorgonzola cheese
• 1/2 teaspoon cornstarch

Blue Cheese Souffle

Directions:

• Preheat the oven to 400° and brush bunt cake pan with butter.

• In a medium saucepan, melt 4 tablespoons of vegan butter. Whisk in the flour and cook over moderate heat for 1 minute. Whisk in the soy milk and cook over moderately low heat until smooth and very thick, about 2 minutes. Stir in the salt and cayenne. Turn off the heat, whisk in the egg yolks, cool slightly. Transfer to a large bowl and stir in the blue cheese, spinach and mushrooms.

• In another large bowl, using an electric mixer, beat the egg whites with the cornstarch at medium-high speed until frothy. Increase the speed to high and beat until firm peaks form. With a rubber spatula, gently fold these whipped egg whites into the remaining mixture.

• Spoon the soufflé mixture into pan. Bake until the soufflé is puffy and golden brown, about 20-25 minutes. Serve immediately, as indeed even the best soufflés do flatten as they cool!

Blue Cheese Souffle

Blue Cheese Souffle

Vegetarian Blue Cheese Soufflé with Vegan or Dairy Options

Ingredients
  

  • 4 tablespoons vegan butter
  • 1/4 cup freshly grated Parmesan/vegan Parmesan cheese
  • 1/4 cup plus 2 tablespoons all-purpose flour or soy flour
  • 1 1/2 cups soy or oat milk
  • 3/4 teaspoon salt
  • 1/4 teaspoon cayenne
  • 6 ounces fresh chopped organic spinach
  • 6 oz chopped baby portobello mushrooms
  • 8 large free range eggs separated
  • 8 ounces crumbled blue/vegan blue Roquefort or Gorgonzola cheese
  • 1/2 teaspoon cornstarch

Instructions
 

  • Preheat the oven to 400° and brush bunt cake pan with butter.
  • In a medium saucepan, melt 4 tablespoons of vegan butter. Whisk in the flour and cook over moderate heat for 1 minute. Whisk in the soy milk and cook over moderately low heat until smooth and very thick, about 2 minutes. Stir in the salt and cayenne. Turn off the heat, whisk in the egg yolks, cool slightly. Transfer to a large bowl and stir in the blue cheese, spinach and mushrooms.
  • In another large bowl, using an electric mixer, beat the egg whites with the cornstarch at medium-high speed until frothy. Increase the speed to high and beat until firm peaks form. With a rubber spatula, gently fold these whipped egg whites into the remaining mixture.
  • Spoon the soufflé mixture into pan. Bake until the soufflé is puffy and golden brown, about 20-25 minutes. Serve immediately, as indeed even the best soufflés do flatten as they cool!

 

Let go of people who are not prepared to love you. This is the hardest thing you will have to do in your life and it will also be the most important thing. Stop having hard conversations with people who don’t want change.
Stop showing up for people who have no interest in your presence. I know your instinct is to do everything to earn the appreciation of those around you, but it’s a boost that steals your time, energy, mental and physical health.

When you begin to fight for a life with joy, interest and commitment, not everyone will be ready to follow you in this place. This doesn’t mean you need to change what you are, it means you should let go of the people who aren’t ready to accompany you.
If you are excluded, insulted, forgotten or ignored by the people you give your time to, you don’t do yourself a favor by continuing to offer your energy and your life. The truth is that you are not for everyone and not everyone is for you.
That’s what makes it so special when you meet people who reciprocate love. You will know how precious you are.

The more time you spend trying to make yourself loved by someone who is unable to, the more time you waste depriving yourself of the possibility of this connection to someone else.
There are billions of people on this planet and many of them will meet with you at your level of interest and commitment.

The more you stay involved with people who use you as a pillow, a background option or a therapist for emotional healing, the longer you stay away from the community you want.
Maybe if you stop showing up, you won’t be wanted. Maybe if you stop trying, the relationship will end. Maybe if you stop texting your phone will stay dark for weeks. That doesn’t mean you ruined the relationship, it means the only thing holding it back was the energy that only you gave to keep it. This is not love, it’s attachment. It’s wanting to give a chance to those who don’t deserve it. You deserve so much, there are people who should not be in your life.
The most valuable thing you have in your life is your time and energy, and both are limited. When you give your time and energy, it will define your existence.

When you realize this, you begin to understand why you are so anxious when you spend time with people, in activities, places or situations that don’t suit you and shouldn’t be around you, your energy is stolen.
You will begin to realize that the most important thing you can do for yourself and for everyone around you is to protect your energy more fiercely than anything else. Make your life a safe haven, in which only ′′compatible′′ people are allowed.
You are not responsible for saving anyone. You are not responsible for convincing them to improve. It’s not your work to exist for people and give your life to them! If you feel bad, if you feel compelled, you will be the root of all your problems, fearing that they will not return the favours you have granted. It’s your only obligation to realize that you are the love of your destiny and accept the love you deserve.

Decide that you deserve true friendship, commitment, true and complete love with healthy and prosperous people. Then wait and see how much everything begins to change. Don’t waste time with people who are not worth it. Change will give you the love, the esteem, happiness and the protection you deserve.”

Brianna Wiest

Edit: Jan. 7, 2021  Credited to ANTHONY HOPKINS, but this has been disputed by SNOPES

Photo by Garon Piceli from Pexels

spiritual bypassing

Repost from Jeff Brown

Author of Grounded Spirituality:

“They didn’t go to sit in the meditation cave to enlighten their consciousness. They went there to bypass their issues with the world. They didn’t turn to silence to extinguish the monkey mind. They turned to silence to turn down the volume on their pain (the monkey heart). They didn’t nestle into stillness because it’s THE royal road to the kingdom of God. They nestled into silence because noise ignited their traumas.

They didn’t tame the ego because the ego is the enemy of the sacred. They tamed it because it confronted them with their unresolved humanness. They didn’t purify the body because the body is something less than Divine. They purified the body in an effort to escape their toxicity. They didn’t strive for transcendence because there is anything up there for us. They strove for transcendence because they lacked the courage to live on Mother Earth.

They didn’t seek formlessness because it is our most awakened state. They sought formlessness because their form hurt too much. They didn’t master non-attachment because it is the primary path to self-realization. They mastered non-attachment so they could sidestep the challenges of human relationship. They didn’t shame anger, because anger is a sub-standard emotion. They shamed anger because it triggers their unacknowledged rage. They didn’t shun non-judgment because all judgments are bad. They shunned non-judgment so they could get away with doing anything they wanted.

Friends, we have been fooled for centuries. The patriarchy went to a lot of trouble to camouflage and cloak their personal issues. A whole spiritual world was birthed from their self-avoidance. And it is now time to call it out. It is now time to bury patriarchal spirituality in a graveyard of its own making, and to co-create a spirituality that is grounded in our humanness, our bodies, our feelings, our relationships with each other and Mother Earth. It’s the only way we can save our species.”

 

cave yogi

 

https://www.facebook.com/Naldjor
Photo by Prince Kumar from Pexels

the fifth trumpet

Is Corona Virus the infamous plague predicted in the Book of Revelations? Well, having lived through it, I’ll give it a resounding yes.

The Fifth Trumpet
…The star opened the pit of the Abyss, and smoke rose out of it like the smoke of a great furnace, and the sun and the air were darkened by the smoke from the pit. And out of the smoke, locusts descended on the earth, and they were given power like that of the scorpions of the earth.  They were told not to harm the grass of the earth or any plant or tree, but only those who did not have the seal of God on their foreheads.…

Revelation 9:3

I ascribe more to the Vedic world view, that we happen to be in a destruction cycle, things change, we call this a KaliYuga. It is a bummer to have to live through as things fall apart with there being a lot of death and destruction caused by our karma, but as Gandalf reminds us: “All we have to decide is what to do with the time that is given us.”

I lie awake at night alone, each breath a welcome struggle to live one more second as my inflamed lungs made me feel like I was drowning. My fever was 102, I had tachycardia, my resting pulse was getting over 120, Defcon 1– full body alarm intruder warning, I could literally see the oscillating matrix of red-tinted death in space, it was intentional, alive- nothing short of the seek and destroy, inhumane, ruthless, where could it find a vulnerability, and if I wanted to give up even for a second, death would have ever so easily welcome me. Yes, I survived Covid 19, and it was a hard fight.

In my semi-altered fevered state, I spontaneously began to pray into space as I often do in the mornings and evenings. Then, I had an Obi-Wan moment, a team of my ancestral protectors appeared in front of me, vivid, clear and real. It was a panel of wisdom beings before me, my Tibetan teacher Tulku Urgyen Rinpoche, my loving grandmother who passed and my yidam, the lion headed goddess Simhamukha, and my exceedingly wrathful protector, I’d prefer not to say her name here now. I was awestruck to see them all there at once, but the quality was none-other than love, compassion and reassurance. We started to talk, or rather, they talked and I listened, the voice was my guru’s.

I asked how is it that they were appearing to me all at once and why? What I will share is now personal, but I checked in and have the green light to share here. He (my teacher) said, we are all here all the time, you don’t yet understand non-duality, so you have to practice much more. We exist as you do, all on the “same shore” behind the constructs of time and space, death and birth. We all exist collectively and are all made of the same substance of light and mind, and you thinking that you are you, and that there are “things” that are separate is just an illusion. He said that I had reached a turning point with the virus, that I was not dying from it and that I would be better in 3 days, and for me to not be in fear.

He said that I spent too much time believing that I exist and then consequently believing that others exist and this creates dualistic grasping. He said I and others waste our lives trying to remedy loneliness on social media by wanting to feel connected and “wanting something” from beings that have no one inside of them that is permanent, real and that my quest was childish and life wasting. Why would I chose to fill my life, chasing beings whose nature is empty as mine is? It wasn’t that they don’t care about beings, but my care had to now pivot from wanting something from others to clear seeing and feeling the fullness of giving. He wanted to remind me to do at least two meditation sessions per day, 2 hours in the morning, and 2 hours in the evening.

Why practice so much I asked if it is all a dream? He said that when you practice, you become a stable, open vessel for wisdom and compassion rather than blocked and “they needed me to do that.” He said that the universe was filled with love and compassion and they forgive me for my flaws. I asked them if I had harmed he Dharma or broken any vows by speaking out against women and child abuse, and they said “no, the things that you expressed concern about were valid and these teachers and monks had to simply stop their misconduct as that was harming the dharma.” I was supposed to work to continue to help to protect children who are harmed.

My teacher had very thick glasses and huge lips, and after our conversation he kissed my forehead like a loving parent, and the whole panel of my wisdom ancestors emanated love to me, took away my fear and reassured me that I would recover soon now. He said don’t sit inert, get up and move, do light yoga and practice and this will soon pass. They said that I always has access to them and that if I practice a lot more, someday all will be revealed. This is true “revelation” that indeed, inspires me most. I am alive today, woke that morning and my fever had resolved. I now tested negative for Covid and no matter how dark things seem, will start anew, giving with the fullest of hearts rather than grasping, and devote my life to the dharma, our own collective, awakened heart.

 

Photo The 5th Trumpet https://www.howarddavidjohnson.com/revelation.htm

Reposted/ Reformatted from https://www.abuddhistlibrary.com 2001 (Images have been enhanced/replaced, copy unaltered)

The enlightened women or female figures named below all come from Vajrayana or “Tibetan” Buddhism, the school of Mahayana which originated in India and later moved to Tibet and the other Himalayan countries. Hence, most figures are identified first by their Sanskrit name, with the alternate Tibetan form appearing in parentheses. When it is the other way about, e.g. Achi Chökyi Drolma, Machig Labdrön and Palden Lhamo, it is because their practices developed or were practised principally in Tibet.

I have also indicated the type of deity each is, i.e.

  • a yidam — an enlightened meditational deity who embodies the union of wisdom and compassion, yet is not separate from the meditator
  • a guru — usually the founder or holder of a lineage; a fully realised being whom one identifies wholly with one’s spiritual guide
  • a Dharma protector — usually portrayed as an enlightened being in wrathful form, a protector’s primary function is to eliminate the spiritual obstacles hindering the practitioner
  • a historical figure — someone who lived as a female human being on this earth and can be placed historically according to tradition

So what’s a thangka?

A thangka (pronounced tonka, as in tonka bean) is a Tibetan painting on cloth, stored scroll-fashion when travelling. For those who wish to learn more about what thangkas are and how they are created, the Dharmapala Centre in Bremen, Germany has an excellent English-language page which explains the process.

This page will be continually updated as I discover more links (and find the time to expand upon the descriptions of the deities). My apologies for any inaccuracies that may arise from my ignorance or haste; your corrections are most welcome. Note: I would love to add more images of female Buddhas and bodhisattvas, provided that my doing so does not violate copyright. If you have any that I may use, please let me know so that this page can be as visually inspiring as possible!

SPECIAL THANKS to New York’s Padmasambhava Buddhist Center who have given their kind permission for me to illustrate this page with selected images from their beautiful online thangka gallery. Most of the deity images below are theirs.

Table of Contents


  1. Achi Chökyi Drolma – Dharma protector of the Drikung Kagyu tradition
  2. Dechen Gyalmo – yidam, guru and historical figure – see Yeshe Tsogyal
  3. Dorje Yudronma – Dharma protector
  4. Ekajati (Ralchigma) – Dharma protector – protectress of mantras
  5. Ekajati – yidam – wrathful Black Tara
  6. Kakasya – yidam
  7. Kuan Yin – Chinese bodhisattva of compassion
  8. Kurukulla – yidam – deity of power
  9. Lamanteri – wrathful yidam
  10. Machig Labdrön – historical figure and yidam – the founder of Chöd
  11. Magzor Gyalmo – Dharma protector – see Palden Lhamo
  12. Mahamaya – historical figure
  13. Mandarava – yidam and historical figure – long-life deity
  14. Marici – yidam – goddess of the sun
  15. Mayadevi – historical figure – mother of Sakyamuni Buddha
  16. Nairatmya – yidam
  17. Niguma – lineage guru and historical figure – lineage dakini
  18. Palden Lhamo (Sri Devi) – Dharma protector – wrathful protectress of Tibet
  19. Prajnaparamita (Yum Chenmo) – guru and yidam – Mother of all the Buddhas
  20. Samantabhadri (Kuntuzangmo) – guru and yidam – Primordial Mother of all the Buddhas
  21. Sarasvati – yidam – goddess of learning and the arts
  22. Simhamukha (Sengdongma) – yidam – lion-headed Dakini
  23. Sukkhasiddhi – guru and historical figure – lineage Dakini
  24. Tara, Green (Drolma) – yidam – beloved Saviouress
  25. Tara, Red – yidam of bountifulness
  26. Tara, White (Drolkar) – yidam – she who grants long life and wisdom
  27. Troma Nagmo (Rudrani) – yidam – see Machig Labdrön
  28. Tseringma – Dharma protector – goddess of the mountain
  29. Ushnisha-sitatapatra – yidam – goddess of the glorious white umbrella
  30. Ushnisha-vijaya – yidam – the long-life deity
  31. Vajrayogini / Vajravarahi (Dorje Naljorma / Dorje Phagmo) – yidam – the queen of Dakinis
  32. Yeshe Tsogyal (Dechen Gyalmo) – yidam, guru and historical figure – mother of Tibetan Buddhism




Achi Chökyi Drolma
Dharma protector of the Drikung Kagyu tradition

Achi Chökyi Drolma (Tib. A-chi Chos-kyi sGrol-ma) is a female Dharma protector whose practice was introduced by Drikung (‘Bri-gung) Achi, the matriarch of the Drikung hereditary lineage. She is white-coloured and is usually portrayed seated and riding a snow lion, the legendary white animal of Tibet; she may also be shown standing (see right). Unusually, for a Dharma protector, Achi Chökyi Drolma’s aspect is not wrathful, but peaceful.  See Achi Chökyi Drolma – Chief Protectress of the Glorious Drigung Kagyu for the story of her origins, an image of the deity, and a description of her iconography.

Dorje Yudronma

Dorje Yudrönma
Dharma protector

Dorje Yudrönma is said to be one of Tibet’s chief protectors. She holds an arrow with the five colours in her right hand and a white silver mirror in her left. The lifestory of the Longchen Nyingthig yogi Jigme Gyalwai Nyugu (from the Dzogchen Lineage of Nyoshul Khenpo) relates that an emanation of this deity appeared and offered him food once when he was suffering hardship and poverty. Dorje Yudrönma is associated with a divination practice which uses a mirror. The Art of Tibet site includes a good thangka of Dorje Yudrönma.

 

Ekajati
Dharma protector – protectress of mantras

Ekajati is a female dharma protector especially popular in Nyingma, where she is also considered a protectress of Dzog Chen. She is cognate to Palden Lhamo. The Nyingma form of Ekajati (whose name literally means ‘One Plait’ or ‘One Braid’) has one tuft of hair, one eye, one mouth, one breast — and sometimes only one leg! — to demonstrate her singleminded devotion to Dharma. Whenever a Nyingma refuge tree or series of protectors is portrayed, Ekajati is usualy the dark-red central figure in the bottom row (see the thangka of Dharma protectors of the Nyingma tradition from the Chagdud Gompa site); however, she may be depicted as dark-blue or black, rather than red. In the Sarma (New Translation) schools Ekajati is regarded as the mother of Mahakala and Mahakali (Palden Lhamo).  Chopa.com has a particularly lovely thangka of Ekajati.

Ekajati
Yidam – wrathful Black Tara

Ekajati is also the name of a wrathful form of Green Tara known as Black Tara. She is depicted in seated posture holding a curved knife and skullcup. This form is often shown in a triumvirate with Avalokiteshvara and Green Tara. This unidentified thangka from Andrew Stinson’s thangka website also depicts Ekajati.

Kakasya
Yidam

Kakasya is a guardian goddess with the face of a crow: one of the bird-headed goddesses associated with the mandalas of various tutelary, or personal, deities. The Asian Art Museum included a delightful statue of Kakasya in its Mongolia exhibit.


Kuan Yin
Bodhisattva of compassion

This female Bodhisattva is variously known in China as Kuan Yin (or Kwan Yin, Quan Yin, Guanyin or Koon Yum), in Japan as Kannon or Shokanzeon Bosatsu, and in Korea as Kwanseum Bosal or Kwan Um. She is regarded as being identical to the (male) Tibetan deity Avalokiteshvara (Tib. Chenrezig), but also has much in common with the female Tibetan deity Tara.

Sites dedicated to Kuan Yin:

  • Kuan Yin, Goddess of Mercy
  • The Quan Yin Virtual Altar – with numerous links to other Kuan Yin sites
  • Kuan Yin – a prayer from the Lotus Sutra, with links to images of statues
  • Temple of Kwan Yin. A virtual temple dedicated to Kwan Yin, Bodhisattva of Compassion in both English and French. Contains a gallery.
  • El Templo de Kwan Yin, a Spanish-language webpage
  • A short hymn to the bodhisattva
  • Kwan Yin Vows by Ven. Sarika Dharma

Articles on Kuan Yin:

  • How to meditate on Tara by Ven. Jhampa Shaneman
  • The Enlightenment Of Bodhisattva Kuan-Yin (Avalokiteshvara)
  • Kuan Yin – Avalokiteshvara Bodhisattva by Lin Shen-Shou
  • Kuan Yin, The Great Compassion Bodhisattva (Avalokiteshvara Bodhisattva)
  • Quan Yin, The Goddess of Compassion and Mercy – an article on the bodhisattva (adapted from an essay by Bethleen Cole)
  • Stories of Quan Yin, Bodhisattva of Compassion
  • A prayer (with melody) to Quan Yin, from a cancer recovery website
  • On celebrating the enlightenment day of Gwan Yin
  • The Eastern Tradition of Kuan Yin & the Tibetan Goddess Tara

Images of the Bodhisattva:

  • A lovely photograph of a statue of Guanyin (see left)
  • A scroll painting of Hibbo Kannon by Kano Hogai (19th century Japan)
  • A scroll of Guanyin from the Dunhuang Buddhist complex, dated to 968 AD, and a statue of her from Rehe (China).
  •  A free Guan Yin screensaver from Toronto’s Cham Shan Temple.


Kurukulla
Yidam – deity of power

Kurukulla is an energetic dancing red figure with one face and four arms, two of which hold a bow and arrow made of flowers. Her practice helps generate energy and power. JBL Statues sell a statuette of Kurukulla, although their equation of Kurukulla with the Hindu goddess Kali is incorrect. The FPMT centre in Boston is named after her (Kurukulla Center for Tibetan Buddhist Studies) and includes a nice thangka of the deity. There are several thangkas available online:
  • Thangkas of Kurukulla on the Art of Tibet site: thangka #322, a stunning, “pale red” Kurukulla surrounded by dozens of her emanations, thangka #422 (on a red background, with Palden Lhamo below), thangka #655 – a clear and simple representation, and thangka #765, a very dramatic depiction of the deity.
  • A thangka of the mandala of Kurukulla is on the Tibet Shop site.

Kurukulla Face

In Geluk tradition Kurukulla is sometimes also referred to as Red Tara [presumably because of her appearance]; but this name can also refer to a completely separate yidam. In the Hevajra Tantra, Kurukulla is a semi-wrathful female power deity, red, in essence Hevajra, and unrelated to Tara.

Lamanteri
Wrathful yidam

The Asian Art Museum of San Francisco included a Mongolia online exhibit which described a statue of Lamanteri thusly: “Lamanteri is the Mongolian name for this wrathful form of the goddess Tara depicted with the third eye and four pairs of hands.”

Painting by Duccio Ceglie
(courtesy of peacenvironment.net)


Machig Labdrön
Historical figure and yidam – the founder of Chöd

Machig Face

The eleventh-century Tibetan founder of the chöd (cutting) practice, Machig Labdrön is usually depicted in deified form as a peaceful white dancing figure with three eyes, playing a damaru (two-sided drum) with her right hand and holding a bell with her left. (She is also depicted in seated form on Miya Shimada’s Chöd Club site.) Thangka #349 on the Art of Tibet site depicts Machig Labdrön’s life story, and thangka #223 shows her at the centre of a Nyingma chöd lineage tree. Alex Clarke’s Chaos/Chös page includes a depiction of Machig; and although it is iconographically incorrect (e.g. the image’s proportions are incorrect; she should be white, not pink; etc.), I include it here because it is an intriguing example of what may become the wave of the future: computer-generated deity images. There is also a short article about Machig Labdrön in Polish (Maczik Labdryn) on this Polish Buddhist site. Aro gTér includes a particularly lovely line drawing of Machig with accompanying article.

Black Tröma
Wrathful Black Tara

 

Other depictions of Tröma on the Web include solitary Tröma (Chagdud Gompa), Tröma Five Deity (Art of Tibet), and Tröma Nine Deity (Chagdud Gompa).

See:

  • Machig Labdrön and the Foundations of Chöd by Jérôme Edou (Ithaca, NY: Snow Lion Publications, 1995)
  • A Study of the Profound Path of gCod: The Mahayana Buddhist Meditation Tradition of Tibet’s Great Woman Saint Machig Labdrön – a Ph.D. dissertation by Carol D. Savvas (University of Wisconsin-Madison, 1990)
  • Women of Wisdom by Tsultrim Allione (London: Arkana, 1984 / New York: Arkana, 1986) – includes the life story of Machig Labdrön

Mahamaya
Historical figure

Mahamaya was the mother of the historical Shakyamuni Buddha, Siddhartha Gautama — this name means ‘Great Illusion.’ See also Mayadevi. There is also a male anuttarayoga deity named Mahamaya who is not to be confused with the Buddha’s mother; this practice is found in all the Sarma (New Translation) schools and was originally made famous by Marpa; it is also found in the ‘Five Deity Tantra’ practice of the Shangpa Kagyu.


Mandarava
Yidam and historical figure – long-life deity

An Indian-born princess who became the spiritual consort of Padmasambhava, founder of Buddhism in Tibet (his second consort was the Tibetan-born Yeshe Tsogyel — see below). She appears in deified form as a yidam of long life, wearing the ornaments of a bodhisattva. Her right hand holds an arrow (a symbol of Dzogchen) adorned with banners and a melong (a round mirror, representing the clear, reflecting nature of mind). Mandarava sits in the manner of Tara, with right foot extended, to show her willingness to help sentient beings.

Marici
Yidam – goddess of the sun

Marici (pron. Marichi) is a red-coloured female yidam associated with the sun and with dawn; her name in Tibetan is Öser Chenma, i.e. [goddess of] Great Light. Her mantra is traditionally used as protection by travellers. Marici has an orange-coloured body (the colour of the sun at dawn), and three faces, eight arms and two legs. Of the three faces, the first (central) is orange and smiling, her right face is red, and her left is the face of a white boar: each has three eyes. Her first right hand holds a vajra at the heart in the mudra of teaching, the second holds a vajra axe, the third holds an arrow with the tip pointing downwards, and the fourth, in the mudra of generosity, holds a (sewing) needle. Her first left hand, in the mudra of teaching, holds the stem of a plant (tree?) whose crown is at the level of her left ear (next to the boar’s face). Her second left hand holds a bow, the third holds a thread (?), and the fourth holds a noose ending in a loop and hook. Marici’s right leg is extended in the manner of Tara, while the left is tucked in. She is dressed in the royal robes of a bodhisattva: five-pointed crown surmounting each face, jewels, silks and so forth. Marici rides a throne/chariot drawn along by seven white boars.

Mayadevi
Historical figure – mother of Sakyamuni Buddha

Queen Mayadevi (also Maya or Mahamaya) was the historical mother of Sakyamuni Buddha. She died not long after his birth, but is believed to have been reborn in one of the heavens where he later manifested and taught her the Dharma so that she too became enlightened. She is traditionally depicted just as she was about to (painlessly) give birth, standing and holding the branch of a tree in her right hand.

Nairatmya
Yidam

This dark-blue figure appears as both a single yidam and also in union with her consort, the Highest Yoga Tantra male yidam Hevajra. The name means ‘No-Self’ in Sanskrit. This was also the name of the wife of Marpa (whose main practice was Hevajra) — the founder of the Kagyu lineage of Tibetan Buddhism.

Niguma
Lineage guru and historical figure – lineage dakini

This woman was a formidable mahasiddha, variously described as the sister or consort of Naropa. She founded the practice known as The Six Yogas of Niguma (see Glenn Mullin’s text The Six Yogas of Sister Niguma, which includes a vigorous line drawing of Niguma).

Palden Lhamo (Sri Devi)
Dharma protector – wrathful protectress of Tibet

Palden Lhamo (whose name translates as “Glorious Goddess”) is the only female dharma protector common to all four schools of Tibetan Buddhism. She is very wrathful, and rides her mule through a sea of blood, surrounded by wisdom fire. She is dark blue and has one face with three eyes; she wears a sun at her navel and a moon at her crown, and over her is a peacock umbrella (a traditional symbol of protection). She is variously depicted, but her most common forms are two-armed and four-armed. There is also a system of divination by dice associated with her. She is sometimes considered cognate to Sarasvati or Tara, but is at the same time a wrathful form of the peaceful goddess Sri Devi.

See:

  • An article on the iconography of Magzor Gyalmo (a form of Palden Lhamo) by Natalie R. Marsh, with an accompanying thangka image. From the Mirrors of the Heart-Mind exhibit.
  • From the same exhibit, an illustrated essay on a sculpture of a figure from the entourage of Palden Lhamo, commentary by Cathleen Cummings
  • my choice for most beautiful depiction of Palden Lhamo on the Web, from the phenomenal Art of Tibet site
  • Another thangka or two from Art of Tibet

Prajnaparamita
Guru and yidam – Mother of all the Buddhas

Prajnaparamita embodies the bliss/emptiness that gives rise to all phenomena — hence her honorofic title as Mother of all the Buddhas. She usually appears as a tranquil seated figure clothed in silks; her body is gold in colour, and she has one face and four arms. Her first two arms are held in meditation posture in her lap, while the other right hand holds a nine-spoked vajra (thunderbolt sceptre symbolising compassion/bliss) and the left, the text of the Heart Sutra which is the essential wisdom-text on the emptiness of phenomena. There are other forms of the deity, as at right: her first two hands in prayer mudra at the heart, second right hand holding a mala [rosary] and second left hand holding a text.

Her name means ‘Perfection of Wisdom’; in Tibetan she is also known as Yum Chenmo, or ‘Great Mother’. She is closely associated with chöd practice (see Machig Labdrön). Natalie R. Marsh offers an essay on the iconography of Prajnaparamita (along with an accompanying thangka image). From the Mirrors of the Heart-Mind exhibit.


Samantabhadri
Guru and yidam – Primordial Mother of all the Buddhas

Samantabhadri (Kuntuzangmo in Tibetan) is the consort and female counterpart of Samantabhadra/Kuntuzangpo, the primordial Buddha of the older schools of Tibetan Buddhism. They are usually shown in sexual union (yab/yum in Tibetan), the blue male figure and white female figure embracing each other in lotus position. Samantabhadri is sometimes shown alone, in which case she is seated in lotus posture with her hands in meditation posture in her lap. Samantabhadri is always shown naked (as is her consort) to demonstrate the unadorned nature of Absolute Truth, the emptiness of all phenomena. She is in some senses an analogue of Prajnaparamita. A near equivalent of the New Translation schools is the dark-blue Vajradhatu-ishvari, shown in union with consort Vajradhara as the yab-yum Vajradhara / Vajradhatu-ishvari.

Sarasvati
Yidam – goddess of learning and the arts

As the goddess of learning and the arts, Sarasvati (also spelled Saraswati) is in many ways a counterpart to Manjushri, the male Bodhisattva of discriminating wisdom, and is sometimes his consort. Sarasvati is a peaceful yidam who holds a vina (a sitar-like lute) on her lap; she also sometimes holds a text. There is also a Hindu deity named Sarasvati with near-identical attributes. She is sometimes associated with Palden Lhamo, who may be regarded as Sarasvati in wrathful form. The most popular form of Sarasvati is white-coloured, with one face, two eyes, and two arms; however, there are many other forms including the white four-handed Sarasvati and the red Vajra Sarasvati.


Simhamukha
Yidam – lion-headed Dakini

Simhamukha (Tib. Seng-gdong-ma or Seng-dong-chen) is a wrathful dancing dark-blue figure similar to Vajravarahi in appearance and ornaments, holding a curved knife in her right hand and a skullcup in her left, except that she also has the face of a lion — hence her name in Tibetan and Sanskrit (meaning “lion-face”). Her practice was founded by a woman, Jetsun[ma] Lochen. Simhamukha’s practice is found in the Sarma (New Translation) schools is associated with the Chakrasamvara Tantra.

Examples of her iconography on the Web are a statue on the Dharmaware website, and two glorious images on the Art of Tibet site: thangkas 424 and 419.

Sukkhasiddhi
Guru and historical figure – lineage Dakini

This mahasiddha belongs to the mother lineage of chöd. Her name means ‘good or blissful siddhi‘ (a Sanskrit word meaning a miraculous accomplishment, which can be either mundane, e.g. healing, flying, etc., or supramundane, i.e. the siddhi of full Enlightenment). She compiled her own six yogas (see also Niguma) which she gave to Khyungpo Naljor, the founder of Shangpa Kagyu.


Tara, Green
Yidam – beloved Saviouress

Also known as Drolma (Tibetan), Tara embodies the compassionate activity of all the Buddhas (her name means “the liberator” or “she who saves”). She is pictured with one face, two arms and a green-coloured body. Her right hand is outstretched in the mudra (sacred gesture) of generosity, and her left holds the stem of a blue lotus which blossoms at her left ear.

See:

  •  The Practice of Tara by Ven. Sangye Khandro
  • Tara: Her Origins and Development by Dharmachari Purna
  •  Green Tara page on Angelfire
  • The Eastern Tradition of Kuan Yin & the Tibetan Goddess Tara
  • Who is Arya Tara?
  • Arya Tara Page
  • Supplication to Tara
  • Blessed Arya Tara Page
  • Download a Windows wallpaper of Tara (available in several sizes) from the Green Tara Gallery, computer-created by Osel Shen Phen Ling webmaster Bob Jacobson.

Books devoted to Tara include:

  • In Praise of Tara: Songs to the Saviouress by Martin Willson (London: Wisdom Publications, 1986)
  • The Cult of Tara: Magic and Ritual in Tibet by Stephan Beyer (Berkeley: University of California Press, 1973) — a study of Tibetan beliefs and practices concerning Tara
  • Longing for Darkness: Tara and the Black Madonna by China Galland (New York: Viking, 1990)
  • Bodhisattva of Compassion: The Mystical Tradition of Kuan Yin by John Blofeld (Boulder: Shambhala, 1978) — a study of Avalokiteshvara, the Bodhisattva of Compassion, in the female forms of Kuan Yin (Chinese) and Tara (Tibetan).

This form of Tara, Green Tara, is the most common one; but Tara also appears in other forms, such as White Tara, Red Tara and the Twenty-One Taras. In the Gelukpa school there is also a Highest Yoga Tantra form of Tara known as Cittamani Tara (as well as a Highest Yoga Tantra form of the Twenty-One Taras practice). See the Praises and Requests to the Twenty-One Taras on the Osel Shen Phen Ling site for an example of a kriya-tantra sadhana (meditation text), as well as the Britannica entry on Tara for a more scholastic look at the deity.

Tara, Red
Yidam of bountifulness

Red Tara is a special practice of Tara practised in both the Nyingma and Sakya schools. She is depicted in much the same way as Green Tara (seated with right leg slightly extended, left hand held to the heart with an utpala flower blooming by her left ear, and right hand making the gesture of generosity), except that her body is ruby-red, she possesses a third eye, and her right hand holds a long-life vase. There are lovely thangka reproductions of this deity (both solitary and amongst her mandala deities) on the Chagdud Gompa site, which also offers a photo of a Red Tara statue with the bow-and-arrow attributes of Kurukulla (to whom she can be related). See also the Art of Tibet site (e.g. thangka 331). Red Tara can also be either one of several out of the various sets of twenty-one Taras, or in the lower tantras (Kriya or Carya).


Tara, White
Yidam – she who grants long life and wisdom

Also known as Drolkar (Tibetan) or Sitatara (Sanskrit), Tara embodies the compassionate activity of all the Buddhas (her name means “the liberator” or “one who saves”). White Tara is especially associated with long life and wisdom. Unlike the green form of this deity, White Tara has seven eyes — one in each hand and foot, and a third eye on her face — to show that she sees and responds to suffering throughout the universe; and she sits in full lotus posture.

  • The Osel Shen Phen Ling site includes a long-life sadhana (practice text) of White Tara.

Tseringma
Dharma protector – goddess of the mountain

Tseringma is the foremost of the Five Long-Life Deities — formerly mountain-guardian spirits — who plagued the great Tibetan yogi Milarepa during his cave retreats. They were converted to Buddhism and Tseringma became his consort. She is a white figure shown riding a snow lion and carrying a long-life vase in her hand. Thangka 433 on the Art of Tibet website depicts Tseringma and her sisters.

Ushnisha-sitatapatra
Yidam – goddess of the glorious white umbrella

This white-coloured deity, a form of Tara, is a female counterpart of the thousand-armed form of Avalokiteshvara. She has one thousand faces, arms and legs; each face has three eyes, and she has one eye in the palm of each hand and the sole of each foot, showing that she watches and protects sentient beings. Her central faces are white (as is her body); her right faces are yellow, the faces at the rear of her body are red, and the left faces green; there is also a “tier” of blue faces at the top of her head. Her right hands hold wheels of the Dharma (dharmachakra) and her left hands hold arrows; one of her other left hands also holds aloft a white parasol which also symbolises her protection.

There is a lovely thangka of Ushnisha-sitatapatra (#429) on the Art of Tibet site. Robert Chung’s website also includes an illustrated sadhana [ritual text] of this deity.

Ushnisha-vijaya
Yidam – the long-life deity

Ushnisha-vijaya (Tib. Namgyalma or Namgyelma) is a peaceful white deity and an emanation of Vairochana Buddha. She has three faces, ten eyes and eight hands. Her right hands hold a lasso, bow, and vase with the nectar of immortality; her fourth right hand bears an eye in the palm and is in the mudra (posture) of generosity. Her left hands hold a miniature Buddha image, a double (crossed) vajra, and an arrow; the fourth left hand is held in meditation posture in her lap.

Ushnisha-vijaya is often shown in a triumvirate with the other two principal long-life deities, red (male) Amitayus and White Tara (see above). Robert Chung’s Namgyelma page includes a picture and her two mantras.


Vajrayogini / Vajravarahi
Yidam – the queen of Dakinis

Vajrayogini (Tib. Dorje Naljorma, Adamantine Female Practitioner) is the principal female yidam of Highest Yoga Tantra of the New Translation schools of Tibetan Buddhism. She is a slightly wrathful red female figure shown holding a curved knife in her right hand, a skullcup in her left and a khatvanga (trident or staff) in her left elbow. The Naro form of Vajrayogini, most commonly seen in the Sakya and Geluk traditions, is shown standing with her face turned upwards and to the left, with the skullcup held up to her mouth and the curved knife pointing to the ground.

The Vajravarahi form of Vajrayogini, generally more frequent in Kagyu, is shown in dancing pose with the right leg bent; this form holds the curved knife up in the air and the skullcup to her heart. Vajravarahi, whose name means Adamantine Sow, is usually shown with a small sow’s head, representing triumph over ignorance, emerging over her right ear. In either form of this deity she may be visualised as a solitary yidam or in union with her consort dark-blue Heruka Chakrasamvara, a principal mother-tantra deity of Highest Yoga Tantra.

Good pictures on the Web include:

  • A lovely statue of Vajravarahi (in karma dakini form) from the Mirrors of the Heart-Mind exhibit.
  • A poem — Homage to Vajrayogini — written by Mark Webber. From Cyberkaya.
  • Statue of Vajravarahi (Dharmaware)
  • Thangka of Vajrayogini Naro Khacho (Dharmaware)
  • The computer-generated image of Vajrayogini and her virtual 3D mandala (Miya Shimada)
  • A most remarkable multi-faced and multi-headed form [mis]identified as “Vajrahari”, from an Indonesian website; any information on this aspect of Vajravarahi would be most gratefully received!

Yeshe Tsogyal
Yidam, guru and historical figure – mother of Tibetan Buddhism

This remarkable female hermit-saint, the Tibetan consort of Padmasambhava, is sometimes shown in Nirmanakaya form — the ’emanation body’ a Buddha takes so as to be visible to ordinary beings — as a woman in everyday Tibetan clothes, seated and holding curved knife and skullcup. She is also shown in deified form as the Queen of Great Bliss (Tib., Dechen Gyalmo) as a red standing figure with a damaru (double-sided drum) raised in her right hand and a curved knife held to the ground with her left.
Yeshe Tsogyal’s sacred biography may be read in Kevin Dowman’s Sky Dancer: the secret life and songs of the Lady Yeshe Tsogyel (London: Arkana, 1989) and Tarthang Tulku’s Mother of Knowledge: The Enlightenment of Ye-shes mTsho-rgyal (Berkeley: Dharma Publishing, 1983). The meditation practice of Dechen Gyalmo, Queen of Great Bliss, is discussed in Anne C. Klein’s Meeting the Great Bliss Queen: Buddhists, Feminists, and the Art of the Self, which has a lovely cover illustration of the deity.

Return to the WAiB Homepage

 

Header image Kali Levitov: https://dakiniasart.org/shop/fruition-fine-art-print-kali-levitov/


Vegan Chick’n Marsala with Grapes

Ingredients:

• 2T olive oil
• 1 stick vegan butter
• 4 vegan chick’n breast cutlets
• 1/2 teaspoon black pepper
• 1/2 teaspoon salt
• 1 (8-oz.) pkg. crimini (baby portobello) mushrooms
• 1 cup of sliced green grapes
• 1/2 large white onion coarsely chopped
• 1/3 cup all-purpose flour (soy flour for those who are gluten free)
• 1/3 cup cornmeal (optional)
• 2/3 cup creamy, unsweetened soy or oat milk
• 1 cup dry Marsala wine
• 1 tablespoon Italian seasoning

vegan chicken marsala ingredients

vegan chicken breasts

Directions:

  1. Boil water with salt and add your choice of pasta (gluten free) and prepare a side salad.
  2. On a plate, mix flour, cornmeal, 1 tsp Italian seasoning 1/2 teaspoon pepper and 1/4 teaspoon salt.
  3. Defrost chick’n breasts and coat with mixture on both sides.
  4. Heat 1 tablespoon oil in a large nonstick deep skillet over medium-high.
  5. Add coated chick’n breasts to pan; cook until browned, about 4 minutes per side. Remove chick’n from pan and set aside (do not wipe out pan).
  6. Melt 1/2 stick butter in pan. Sauté mushrooms, onions and grapes. Cook, stirring occasionally, until mushrooms are browned, about 5 minutes.
  7. Add creamy soy milk, remaining vegan butter and Marsala wine to pan; bring to a boil. Cook until slightly thickened, 2 to 3 minutes, add more salt and pepper to taste. Add cooled chick’n breasts back to pan, turning to coat. Sprinkle with Italian seasoning. Serve with healthy pasta and salad!

vegan chicken marsala

vegan marsala

vegan marsala4

Vegan Chick'n Marsala with Grapes

Ingredients
  

  • 2 T olive oil
  • 1 stick vegan butter
  • 4 vegan chick'n breast cutlets
  • 1/2 teaspoon black pepper
  • 1/2 teaspoon salt
  • 1 8-oz. pkg. crimini (baby portobello) mushrooms
  • 1 cup of sliced green grapes
  • 1/2 large white onion coarsely chopped
  • 1/3 cup all-purpose flour soy flour for those who are gluten free
  • 1/3 cup cornmeal optional
  • 2/3 cup creamy unsweetened soy or oat milk
  • 1 cup dry Marsala wine
  • 1 tablespoon Italian seasoning

Instructions
 

  • Boil water with salt and add your choice of pasta (gluten free) and prepare a side salad.
  • On a plate, mix flour, cornmeal, 1 tsp Italian seasoning 1/2 teaspoon pepper and 1/4 teaspoon salt.
  • Defrost chick'n breasts and coat with mixture on both sides.
  • Heat 1 tablespoon oil in a large nonstick deep skillet over medium-high.
  • Add coated chick'n breasts to pan; cook until browned, about 4 minutes per side. Remove chick'n from pan and set aside (do not wipe out pan).
  • Melt 1/2 stick butter in pan. Sauté mushrooms, onions and grapes. Cook, stirring occasionally, until mushrooms are browned, about 5 minutes.
  • Add creamy soy milk, remaining vegan butter and Marsala wine to pan; bring to a boil. Cook until slightly thickened, 2 to 3 minutes, add more salt and pepper to taste. Add cooled chick'n breasts back to pan, turning to coat. Sprinkle with Italian seasoning. Serve with healthy pasta and salad!

walk in sun

You know, I happen to be Buddhist, but one with an inquisitive mind. We have what we know as the Buddha’s First Noble Truth and that is: “Life is Suffering.” However, it’s a misnomer to just stop there and concede to a life of misery. I think a lot of students and even some teachers feel that we just need to wake up to the that fact this life is hallmarked by sense of misery and dissatisfaction. One even wrote a book called: “Not For Happiness,” depressing. However, leaving this first noble truth truism as a final statement, in my opinion, would be the antithesis of what the Buddha had intended with his teachings and realization. Why? Because his subsequent teachings say… there is indeed a way out of suffering- we don’t have to be miserable! That was his very quest. That’s the entire point of what it means to be a Buddhist; we believe that at some point, we will not be forever bound and controlled by a mind that makes us unhappy.

Some teachers talk about our need to be comfort seeking and seek pleasure and use our Buddhist practice as sort of a health and mental improvement task, an ego boost and an effort to make “samsara comfortable,” but I beg to differ. I ascribe to the theory that “pain is inevitable but suffering is optional.” Have you ever had a backache or headache, and it didn’t feel great but maybe inside you felt such a sense of warmth and well-being or were doing something super fun, that you were just able to ignore it and didn’t let it ruin your day? That is pain but not suffering; our difficulties can take place in a larger space of accommodation.

I recall one day, I was feeling particularly depressed and anxious and just didn’t feel like getting out of bed. It was a sunny day, I could see the white and pink magnolia tree outside and morning birds chirping, but I was miserable. A lot of hopeless thoughts and negative self talk was swirling around in my mind and making me really sad, without any energy. I started to just imagine in that moment, is there anything beautiful that I can recall? Then I remembered one of my friends, he used to be a pretty close Yogi friend who lives on what might be, lifetime retreat. During the warmer months, he wakes up every morning and makes some tea and does meditation and yoga outside on a colored, hand-loomed woolen Tibetan carpet on his porch, greeting the sun. Just the memory of him, sitting in the sun inspired me and I jumped up out of bed, took a shower did little bit of yoga and meditation myself, and all of the mind-made depression and anxiety completely dissipated, like a cloud clearing!

I know it’s hard for a lot of us to do hours of sitting meditation we have a very movement and “doing rather than being” oriented society- get up and go and always be busy, distracted or doing something… anything! You know the old work ethic Christian proverb: “Idle hands are the devil’s workshop.” Maybe a lot of us aren’t cut out to be super disciplined yogis and mindfulness, this panacea that will heal all woes. I checked with a lot of my friends and in all honesty, a lot of them admit to not really practicing meditation very much, a lot of us are Buddhist in name or theory only. So even if you’re not destined to become a yogic mahasiddha or totally liberated and enlightened in this life, I think we can borrow from a lot of the exceedingly simple and powerful healing modalities that can make great improvements toward our happiness, reduce anxiety and increase well-being… every single day! I don’t think that any religion, even Buddhism has the only way or copyright- patent-and trademark on one particular route toward spirituality or human well-being. I actually think the Buddha would endorse this approach, after all, the third and fourth noble truths clearly say that we don’t have to live forever, bound by mind-imposed suffering, and it can be as easy as changing a thought. Here are a few tips to cheer up and indeed use this “Life For Happiness.”

 

Simple Practices to uplift your mood and start and finish your day feeling refreshed, happy and be more joyous:

 

Sunshine

Serotonin is a neurotransmitter that is required for positive mood. Serotonin production happens whenever we get sunlight through our eyes and feel the warmth the on top of our head. Ensuring that we go out for one half to one hour per day is an inexpensive, nutritive and easy method to increase our mood. Be sure you take your sunglasses off for fifteen minutes.

Forest Bathing

Forest bathing–sitting quietly among trees–has been proven to have many mood-boosting benefits. In Japan “forest bathing” is prescribed by doctors and even covered by medical health insurance!

Earthing

“Earthing,” that is simply putting your bare feet on the earth where there’s some moisture and coolness for contact. This can re-calibrate and regulate your entire energetic system and lead to wellness and well-being. Release any stress, pain, sadness, anything into the earth that you are ready to let go of, when you contact the ground. It might take some time to ground entire body, but you only need about fifteen minutes every day.

Exercise

Exercise, as we know is a fantastic mood-booster. Walking, hiking and running could be easily done by almost anyone and doesn’t even require a lot of special equipment. To reset your mood and get the greatest health advantages, 30 minutes to an hour of exercise per day is ideal, but every little bit is helpful!

Straight Posture

Standing or sitting up straight and holding your head up actually provides a neurotransmitter activity increase to your brain, and opens the whole energetic system. So check your posture regularly and ensure you’re not walking around with your head hanging down, sulking or staring at your phone! Observing your posture will also assist you to prevent or reduce chronic pain.

pexels-pixabay-279947

Stay Hydrated

Not getting enough water will increase your fatigue and drain your joyful mood. Make sure to keep a glass of water besides you at all times and drink through the day. I love to drink 16 oz. of warm water with a packet of orange emergen-c each morning before I do anything else. “It’s got electrolytes.” This provides a bit “mini-cleanse” each morning.

Obviously, if you think about it, all of these things may be done at the exact same time, take advantage of where you live, the mountains and foothills, or your local park, and go on a walk or climb. If you can, just be sure to take off your shoes and dip your legs in a mountain stream!

Getting the maximum out of sleep and having an effective morning and evening routine, 15 minutes of meditation, journaling and eating antioxidant fresh fruits and vegetables are additional areas which will greatly improve your happiness joyful disposition and endurance.

So you see, there are many simple of ways to increase your well-being, which can be easy, natural, free and safe. One hour per day, out of 24 toward self care could be the difference between a joyous life- or not! You owe it to yourself, integrate these six powerful steps into your daily routine, Just for Happiness!

 

lentil-winter-stew

 

Vegan Winter Curry Lentil Soup with Sweet Potatoes and Kale

This vegan flavorful spicy stew has sweet potatoes, coconut milk, kale and lentils, hearty with an Indian flair.

SPROUT TIME 2 days ahead if possible
PREP TIME 20 mins
COOK TIME 1 hour
TOTAL TIME 1 hr 20 mins

Servings: 6

sprouted-lentiles

Ingredients:

• 3 large organic sweet potatoes, unpeeled scrubbed clean and diced into 1-inch squares
• 16 oz organic green lentils (best if sprouted, soaked for two nights before, living sprouts add more nutrients!)
• 3 cups of vegetable stock (plain water is ok too)
• 2 cans can full fat coconut milk
• 1 small bunch kale remove stems and coarsely chop
• 1 tablespoon coconut oil
• 1 medium yellow onion diced
• 2-3T hot curry powder or regular curry powder with 1/2t hot red pepper powder
• 2-inch piece fresh ginger, peeled and minced or 1t powdered
• 3 cloves garlic, peeled and minced
• ground sea salt and ground black pepper, to taste
• 1T monkfruit or coconut sugar, to taste
• Optional garnish: chopped cilantro lime wedges

Instructions:

  1. Sprout lentils if you have time. Soak lentils overnight for two night prior to making, and change the water 2x per day. Un-sprouted lentils work too.
  2. In a large stock pot, cook lentils in vegetable stock with salt for about 30-40 minutes until tender.
  3. At the same time boil the diced sweet potatoes in a separate sauce pan, and when ready, drain.
  4. Heat a large sauté pan over medium heat. Add the coconut oil to the pot and let it melt. Add the onions to the pan and stir. Saute the onions, stirring occasionally, until translucent about 5 minutes. Add the curry powder and saute spices, ginger and garlic to the pan and cook for a few minutes, do not burn. Add a pinch of salt and pepper.
  5. Add everything to the stock pot.
  6. Add the coconut milk and kale to the pot and stir. Place the lid on top and continue to simmer the stew until the kale is wilted and bright green, about 3-4 minutes.
  7. Add sweetener, salt, pepper and a squeeze of lime to taste.
  8. (Optional) Serve, garnish with cilantro and lime.
winter lentil curry stew

Vegan Winter Curry Lentil Soup with Sweet Potatoes and Kale

This vegan flavorful spicy stew has sweet potatoes, coconut milk, kale and lentils, hearty with an Indian flair.

Ingredients
  

  • 3 large organic sweet potatoes unpeeled scrubbed clean and diced into 1-inch squares
  • 16 oz organic green lentils best if sprouted, soaked for two nights before
  • 3 cups of vegetable stock plain water is ok too
  • 2 cans can full fat coconut milk
  • 1 small bunch kale remove stems and coarsely chop
  • 1 tablespoon coconut oil
  • 1 medium yellow onion diced
  • 2-3 T hot curry powder or regular curry powder with 1/2t hot red pepper powder
  • 2- inch piece fresh ginger peeled and minced or 1t powdered
  • 3 cloves garlic peeled and minced
  • ground sea salt and ground black pepper to taste
  • 1 T monkfruit or coconut sugar to taste
  • Optional garnish: chopped cilantro lime wedges

Instructions
 

  • Sprout lentils if you have time. Soak lentils overnight for two night prior to making, and change the water 2x per day. Un-sprouted lentils work too.
  • In a large stock pot, cook lentils in vegetable stock with salt for about 30-40 minutes until tender.
  • At the same time boil the diced sweet potatoes in a separate sauce pan, and when ready, drain.
  • Heat a large sauté pan over medium heat. Add the coconut oil to the pot and let it melt. Add the onions to the pan and stir. Saute the onions, stirring occasionally, until translucent about 5 minutes. Add the curry powder and saute spices, ginger and garlic to the pan and cook for a few minutes, do not burn. Add a pinch of salt and pepper.
  • Add everything to the stock pot.
  • Add the coconut milk and kale to the pot and stir. Place the lid on top and continue to simmer the stew until the kale is wilted and bright green, about 3-4 minutes.
  • Add sweetener, salt, pepper and a squeeze of lime to taste.
  • Serve, garnish with cilantro and lime.

Notes

SPROUT TIME 2 days ahead if possible
PREP TIME 20 mins
COOK TIME 1 hour
TOTAL TIME 1 hr 20 mins

Authentic Indian Chai

I lived in India and Nepal and traveled through Bhutan, Sikkim and Darjeeling, and got used to drinking “masala cha” or Indian spiced chai many times per day. Today is an at home snow day and what better treat but to make a giant pot of warm tea to keep on hand! There are a lot of things that claim to be authentic chai, sold in modern coffee shops, Starbucks and even some ready-made ones like Bhakti chai, in all honesty not one of them are even slightly reminiscent of what Indians really drink. However I’ve cracked the code and found the most authentic recipe and this one is even dairy free and sugar free but still really sweet, light and creamy, and.. spicy!

 

How to Make Indian Chai

Prep: 10 minutes
Cook: 5 minutes
Yield: Makes about 6 cups of masala chai- 6 servings.
Tools: A tea strainer, a pot with a spout, a thermos
Spicy and sweet and absolutely authentic!

For the chai:

  • 1 cup milk extra creamy oat milk
  • 5 cups water
  • 3T monkfruit sugar
  • 5T loose black Indian tea leaves
  • 1 tsp ground cardamom
  • 1 tsp ground cinnamon
  • 1 tsp pumpkin pie spice (or sub. 1/2 tsp clove)
  • 1 tsp powered nutmeg
  • 1/4 tsp ground black pepper (yes black pepper)
  • 1/4 tsp powered ginger

Chai ingredients

Directions:

  1. Boil the water in a deep stock or saucepan, if it has a spout, that’s best.
  2. Pour all ingredients except the tea.
  3. Place over medium heat.
  4. Allow to heat until small bubbles appear around the perimeter of the water and milk.
  5. When the water and milk comes to a boil, pour in the tea leaves and turn off the heat and stir well.
  6. Allow to steep for about 5 minutes off of the burner.
  7. Do not cook the tea on heat.
  8. Strain carefully into a thermos, and serve!

chai pot

Additional Notes:

Craft your own individual tea based on taste. Some people like it’s sweeter, some people like it spicier than some people like to omit the pepper and ginger. The traditional recipe calls for whole milk and regular sugar, which of course you can substitute if you want to have it taste exactly like it tastes in India and Nepal. These herbs, in Tibetan medicine have a deeply nutritive effect as well as being flavorful. Cheers!

strain chai

Indian Chai

chai header

Authentic Indian Chai Tea-Sugar and Dairy Free

I lived in India and Nepal and traveled through Bhutan, Sikkim and Darjeeling, and got used to drinking "masala cha" or Indian spiced chai many times per day. Today is an at home snow day and what better treat but to make a giant pot of warm tea to keep on hand! There are a lot of things that claim to be authentic chai, sold in modern coffee shops, Starbucks and even some ready-made ones like Bhakti chai, in all honesty not one of them are even slightly reminiscent of what Indians really drink. However I've cracked the code and found the most authentic recipe and this one is even dairy free and sugar free but still really sweet, light and creamy, and.. spicy!

Equipment

  • Prep: 10 minutes
  • Cook: 5 minutes
  • Yield: Makes about 6 cups of masala chai- 6 servings.
  • Tools: A tea strainer, a pot with a spout, a thermos
  • Spicy and sweet and absolutely authentic!

Ingredients
  

  • 1 cup milk extra creamy oat milk
  • 5 cups water
  • 3 T monkfruit sugar
  • 5 T loose black Indian tea leaves
  • 1 tsp ground cardamom
  • 1 tsp ground cinnamon
  • 1 tsp pumpkin pie spice or sub. 1/2 tsp clove
  • 1 tsp powered nutmeg
  • 1/4 tsp ground black pepper yes black pepper
  • 1/4 tsp powered ginger

Instructions
 

  • Boil the water in a deep stock or saucepan, if it has a spout, that's best.
  • Pour all ingredients except the tea.
  • Place over medium heat.
  • Allow to heat until small bubbles appear around the perimeter of the water and milk.
  • When the water and milk comes to a boil, pour in the tea leaves and turn off the heat and stir well.
  • Allow to steep for about 5 minutes off of the burner.
  • Do not cook the tea on heat.
  • Strain carefully into a thermos, and serve!

Notes

Craft your own individual tea based on taste. Some people like it's sweeter, some people like it spicier than some people like to omit the pepper and ginger. The traditional recipe calls for whole milk and regular sugar, which of course you can substitute if you want to have it taste exactly like it tastes in India and Nepal. These herbs, in Tibetan medicine have a deeply nutritive effect as well as being flavorful. Cheers!

juice fast

Treat your body to an infusion of nutrient density and energy! Here are my favorite organic juice cleanse recipes that make for a rejuvenating cleanse and a complete body reset. I am a big fan of juice fasting, and my body simply loves it! The body has a natural ability to rejuvenate and heal itself, with a little kind care and help. I wanted to share what a juice cleanse looks like from start to finish. First let me say, I’m not a dietitian and I do not claim to be an expert, but I learned a few tips as a health coach. It’s also nice to give your heavier food intake and digestion little rest and maybe to lose a little weight when we are feeling bloated. It’s also great to cleanse in the new year after following our holiday indulgences. I try to do these once per month, or at least quarterly/ seasonally.

What does a juice cleanse do for your body?

As I mentioned previously, I am not a doctor or dietitian so you ought to consult with one if necessary of if you have any health concerns or conditions. Juice fasting is not recommended if you have to do intense physical exercise, demanding work or really intense yoga practice, especially kundalini or pranayama practices. Light, healthy stretching, hatha yoga, and gentle walks in the sun are fine for this juice fast. Try to take it easy, meditate, take Epsom salt baths and rub the body with oil to stimulate the lymphatic system and calm the nerves.

My personal experience of juicing and smoothie making has been invaluable. The juices supply a mega dose of nourishment and antioxidants to my body that makes us feel great. For me I found it better to include to green smoothies per day to add more calories and nutrients to keep me more grounded and able to still go to work, as too few calories can make me dizzy and lightheaded.

Juice fasting allows my body to reset with regards to digestion. The additional dose of vitamins boosts our immune system also gives us far more energy that normal. How long should you do a juice cleanse?  It is completely up to you. I consider that I get the best results when I make juices for 2-3 days. You must remember that along with those 2-3 juicing days, there’s a post cleansing period that is very important.

In case you are new to juicing, I’d say start with a 2 day cleanse. After the cleanse ease back into solid foods by eating salads and small vegetarian meals, chewing slowly, drink herbal cleansing tea, and hydrate with considerable quantities of water.

 

juice fast

So in order to begin, you will need a juicer and a good-quality blender with powerful blades like a NutriBullet or Ninja. If you don’t have a juicer you usually can get a cheap one by asking around on Craigslist or Nextdoor and I recently found a whole bunch of working ones for 10-20 dollars at the local thrift store. If you truly are not able to acquire a juicer and/or blender you want to get started on the fast right away you can use the ready-made juice bottles that you can get at any health food store. I have done it, I bought a few big jars of organic carrot juice and beet juice and some ready-made smoothies. Of course there’s nothing as nutritive as cutting your own vegetables and creating your at-home living fresh organic juices. Higher quality, slow processing juicers extract more fiber and nutrients from the veggies and fruits that gives you more pulp and gives you a bit of a milder juice aka more fiber!

 

green juice smoothie

 

When you create an at home fasting cleanse, your diet will need to be pretty basic. Raw fruits and vegetables are a necessity, and you should make sure that they are organic and fresh. Eliminate all sugars, carbohydrates, high fructose corn syrup, wheat, corn, and any other food products that are grown using pesticides.

As you fast, you will need to make sure that you are drinking enough water. Water helps to flush the system, and it can also help to cleanse your bowels and keep your stomach feeling full. Drinking plenty of water when you create your own cleansing tea is very important.

What does a juice cleanse schedule look like?

I drink about 5 servings of juice a day and 6 glasses of plain water. I make 3 types of juice and I call them by color. Green Juice (2 servings per day ), Red Juice (2 servings per day ), Orange Juice (1 serving per day ). And after that I cap off the day with golden almond moon milk.

A 16 oz drink every 2-3 hours for a total of 5-6 juice/milk drinks per day, plus water

So here’s what a juice fast day looks like:

• 7:00 am wake up — drink warm tea made from lemon water and honey or stevia
• 8:00 am — Red Juice + Water
• 12:00 noon Green Juice Smoothie + Water
• 2:00 pm — Red Juice + Water
• 4:00 pm Orange, Carrot and Ginger Juice + Water
• 6:00 pm Green Juice Smoothie + Water
• 9:00 pm  Moon Milk Oat or Almond Milk Tea with turmeric and ashwaghanda

Orange, Carrot, and Ginger Juice

Ingredients- All Organic:

  • 8 medium (about 1.5 pounds) carrots – scrubbed clean and tops cut off
  • 8 medium (about 3 1/4 pounds) juicing oranges (depending on your juicer, you may need to cut the peels off)
  • 1 3-inch knob fresh ginger – peeled

Instructions:

Place everything in a juicer. Serve immediately.


Red Juice- Beet, Carrot and Green Apple

Ingredients- All Organic:

  • 2 medium beets, trimmed and scrubbed
  • 1 Granny Smith apple, peeled and core
  • 3 medium carrots, peeled
  • 1T fresh lemon juice

Instructions:

Place everything in a juicer. Serve immediately.


Green Juice Smoothie

Ingredients- All Organic:

  • 1 cup fresh spinach
  • 1 cup water
  • 1/2 cup frozen pineapple
  • 1/2 cup frozen mango
  • 1 banana
  • 1T flax oil or ground flax seeds

(Variations: you can substitute the pineapple and mango for one more banana and a chopped apple, or 1c. of a three berry mix)

Instructions:

Place everything in a blender. Serve immediately.

Day 1:  It is always the hardest for me because you might feel a bit light headed and hungry. The truth is, we are packing our entire body with so many micro-nutrients, it’s plenty to operate on.

Day 2:  You might feel very light and joyous. I get better sleep through the night, wake up in the morning ready to proceed. Things are sharp and crisp and you’re simply ready to take on the afternoon!

I do organic juice fasting about every 3-4 months as a way to re-set my entire body and allow it rest. It’s a life changing treat for your body and mind, try one today!

beet juice fast

How to Create A Two Day Juice and Smoothie Cleanse- Three Juice Recipes: Red, Orange and Green

Treat your body to an infusion of nutrient density and energy! Here is my favorite organic juice cleanse recipes that make for a rejuvenating cleanse and a complete body reset. I am a big fan of juice fasting, and my body simply loves it! The body has a natural ability to rejuvenate and heal itself, with a little kind care and help. I wanted to share what a juice cleanse looks like from start to finish. A 16 oz drink every 2-3 hours for a total of 5-6 juice/milk drinks per day, plus water

Ingredients
  

  • Orange Carrot and Ginger Juice
  • Ingredients- All Organic:
  • 8 medium about 1.5 pounds carrots - scrubbed clean and tops cut off
  • 8 medium about 3 1/4 pounds juicing oranges (depending on your juicer, you may need to cut the peels off)
  • 1 3- inch knob fresh ginger - peeled
  • Red Juice- Beet Carrot and Green Apple
  • Ingredients- All Organic:
  • 2 medium beets trimmed and scrubbed
  • 1 Granny Smith apple peeled and core
  • 3 medium carrots peeled
  • 1 T fresh lemon juice
  • Green Juice Smoothie
  • Ingredients- All Organic:
  • 1 cup fresh spinach
  • 1 cup water
  • 1/2 cup frozen pineapple
  • 1/2 cup frozen mango
  • 1 banana
  • 1 T flax oil or ground flax seeds
  • Variations: you can substitute the pineapple and mango for one more banana and a chopped apple, or 1c. of a three berry mix

Instructions
 

  • Instructions:
  • Place everything in a juicer or blender. Serve immediately.

 

Photo by Element5 Digital from Pexels
Photo by Alisha Mishra from Pexels

Healthy Tibetan Bread- Balep Korkun (Monastery Bread)

I lived amongst Tibetans in Nepal for many years. Every morning we would get up and make a homemade kneaded bread called Balep. I used to do a lot of solitary meditation retreat there and this was the easiest an fastest thing to make on a one burner hotplate. Balep is a very traditional native fire bread, originating in central Tibet, that can be made with the most simple of ingredients and cooked over an open fire as was traditional in their originally nomadic culture. It’s eaten most every morning by Tibetans, and also the primary breakfast staple in all of the monasteries. It’s kind of like in-between a homemade tortilla and an English muffin; it’s thicker than a tortilla, and people will make them in different ways. I made a denser, heavier and more complex, protein and flax infused version, but the simple, original flour, water and baking powder one works just as well! This recipe makes bread for 3-4 people.

Ingredients:

• 1 and 1/2 cups of Paleo flour or rice flour
• 1/2 cup of organic white flour
• 1T of baking powder
• 2T of ground flax meal
• 1T of whey powder
• 1/2 t. of salt
• One cup of soy milk or water (more or less depending on altitude/ dryness)
• One egg

You also make this simple, native “fire bread” more simply with just: any flour-2c., baking powder, 1T., and 1c. water.

Belap-Korkun ingredients

Preparing the Dough:

  1. Firstly, you mix ingredients and a little milk very well by hand and keep adding milk until you can make a smooth ball of dough. Do not over-wet, the dough should stay drier, sticky and ready to knead.
  2. Then knead the dough very well until the dough is flexible.
  3. When you have finished kneading the dough, separate it into six pieces and roll them into balls.
  4. After that, place the dough on a floured surface and roll it out with a rolling pin, making a flat, round shape about 1/2″ high x 6″d.
  5. Repeat with all your dough.

tibetan bread kneeding

Belap Korkun rolling

Belap cooking

Cooking:

  1. I cook my Tibetan bread in a medium cast iron pan with a little bit of olive oil.
  2. First, heat up your frying pan on high until it gets hot.
  3. Turn down the heat to medium low and place one bread there.
  4. Cook one for 5 minutes on medium low heat.
  5. Turn over the bread after five minutes, to slowly cook both sides without burning. Repeat and add more oil.

For a variation: If you like, you can add a sweetener like honey or maple syrup, blueberries or raisins into your mix or on top- get creative! I serve mine with strawberry jam, butter and homemade Tibetan Hot Sauce!

Belap Korkun

Belap Korkun

Healthy Tibetan Bread- Balep Korkun (Monastery Bread)

I lived amongst Tibetans in Nepal for many years. Every morning we would get up and make a homemade kneaded bread called Balep. I used to do a lot of solitary meditation retreat there and this was the easiest an fastest thing to make on a one burner hotplate. Balep is a very traditional native fire bread, originating in central Tibet, that can be made with the most simple of ingredients and cooked over an open fire as was traditional in their originally nomadic culture. It's eaten most every morning by Tibetans, and also the primary breakfast staple in all of the monasteries. It's kind of like in-between a homemade tortilla and an English muffin; it's thicker than a tortilla, and people will make them in different ways. I made a denser, heavier and more complex, protein and flax infused version, but the simple, original flour, water and baking powder one works just as well! This recipe makes bread for four people.

Ingredients
  

  • 1.5 cups cups of Paleo flour or rice flour
  • 1/2 cup organic white flour
  • 1 T baking powder
  • 2 T ground flax meal
  • 1 T whey powder
  • 1/2 t of salt
  • 1 cup soy milk or water more or less depending on altitude/ dryness
  • 1 egg

Instructions
 

  • Preparing the Dough:
  • Firstly, you mix ingredients and a little milk very well by hand and keep adding milk until you can make a smooth ball of dough. Do not over-wet, the dough should stay drier, sticky and ready to knead.
  • Then knead the dough very well until the dough is flexible.
  • When you have finished kneading the dough, separate it into six pieces and roll them into balls.
  • After that, place the dough on a floured surface and roll it out with a rolling pin, making a flat, round shape about 1/2″ high x 6"d.
  • Repeat with all your dough.
  • Cooking:
  • I cook my Tibetan bread in a medium cast iron pan with a little bit of olive oil.
  • First, heat up your frying pan on high until it gets hot.
  • Turn down the heat to medium low and place one bread there.
  • Cook each for 5 minutes on medium low heat.
  • Turn over the bread after five minutes, to slowly cook both sides without burning. Repeat and add more oil.

Notes

For a variation: If you like, you can add a sweetener like honey or maple syrup, blueberries or raisins into your mix or on top- get creative! I serve mine with strawberry jam, butter and homemade Tibetan Hot Sauce!
tulku urgyen

Tulku Urgyen Rinpoche

This is the traditional ancient Tibetan Bön refuge prayer that you chant before every meditation session. With it, I supplicate my sublime Buddhist teacher, Tulku Urgyen Rinpoche, who passed away in 1996, and I haven’t forgotten him for even one day. What I would give to see his golden face of kindness again, but when we sing this, I remember. I was living in Nepal and studying with him as well as studying Tibetan Art. He was a seasoned yogic meditation master, and did many years in solitary retreat. When I was in the room with him, his presence was overwhelming, indescribable compassion, love and magic. Just being around him showed us all what brightness was within us.

At the end of his life, he was ill for awhile, and we were not permitted to see him but we could go upstairs to his outside balcony at his nunnery and every morning and his nun attendant would open up the curtains in the window and Rinpoche would look at each one of us and hold his hand up and offer us prayers. There was no one there that was not crying, we so longed to see him and we could only see him through that window. He passed away one evening and from what I understand he asked one of the nuns for his hat and set up straight he breathed out and went into a deep meditation state called tukdam.

tulku urgyen last days

I was staying in Nepal at Beru Khyentse Rinpoche’s guest house, and at about 7:30 in the morning, I got a knock on my door from one of the monks. He said to me that your teacher has passed away but they’re asking for people to not go up there because there could be a lot of chaos. I think I was in shock and I went to go take a shower and as I was taking a shower I just broke down and slid from the shower onto the floor in cried without console. I had a Tibetan boyfriend that had a motorcycle and I asked him please take me up there right away. It turned out that because I was a student, they permitted me to just sit and meditate by the body and pay my last respects and we sat there all day and into the evening. Many western students were there with him, in the early morning, and he was sitting straight up in meditation posture. We meditated with him for about 10 hours, with a clear morning mist-less mountain sky which was unusual for Nepal. The sky stayed cloudless, even until the evening, the stars were so bright and we sat outside. At the end of his tukdam, there were some magical signs, but you can read about that elsewhere. It was not sad because the space was so densely filled with blessings, that I felt closer to him than ever. It was funny, being there on the night he passed away was the first time I ever realized that what he showed us existed within us. I think I was a bit codependent and believed that the warmth and openness that I felt around him only came from him, it wasn’t until this last teaching that I received by being there at his side, that I realized I had access to it, the enlightened heart/ mind of the Buddha at every moment, if we were to just settle down and see. What a gift!

He never harmed me or anyone, there was no slave and ownership guru command and control. It saddens me that there are Lamas and clergy out there that do use their position to hurt others, under the auspices of something so powerful and beautiful, but mine never did. I only knew him for four years, but was fortunate enough to have spent about 200 precious hours with him, at his feet. Now, when I’m feeling sad or have self doubt, I call on what I remember from our time. My main Buddhist community is dissolving and sometimes I feel alone, sanghaless like a masterless Ronin, but with this song, and my treasured retreat practice, I can remember him. May everyone connect to something truly benevolent and wholesome, to uncover the power and magic that resides dormant in our human heart. May all beings not only be free from suffering, but shine~ light is indeed, our birthright.

Guru Yoga or Lama’i Nalyor

We sing this song with devotion and longing to call upon our teacher to ultimately connect with her or his awakened mind, heart and warmth within ourselves.

CHI TSUK DE WA CHHEN POI PHO DRANG DU

In the palace of great bliss above the crown of my head

DRIN CHHEN TSA WE LAMA LA SOL WA DEP

I pray to you benevolent root teacher

SAN GYE SEM SU TON PA RIN PO CHHE

Precious one who is the embodiment of Buddha Nature

RANG NGO RANG GI SHE PAR JIN GYI LOP

Bless me that I may recognize my own true nature.

 

 

 

Be your own Valentine, a warm bouquet of roses… to you for you!

Today is Valentine’s Day and one of the most amazing treats of my life that I offer to myself nightly, is just to make myself a warm Epsom salt and rose bath, with candlelight. It’s so easy to create this amazingly nutritive and relaxing sacred space, a home-spa with very easy to get items. Taking a warm Epsom salt bath completely relaxes your nervous system and helps promote sleep because the Epsom salts are high in calming magnesium and I often add dried or fresh rose petals and rose essential oil. Then, when the bath is done I dry off and rub rose body oil on from head to toe in front of a fire, before bed. This enhances a sense of self-love and well-being no matter what’s happening in our lives or if we are alone, it’s impossible to not feel blessed and in bliss, by taking this warm, restorative healing bath of love.

candles and rose

Directions:

Fill bathtub with hot water and add:

• 2 cups of Epsom salt for a standard-size bathtub.
• Pour the Epsom salt into warm running water.
• Add the 5 drops your choice of these following suggested essential oils to help relax and get to sleep:
• lavender
rose
ylang ylang
• bergamot
• jasmine
• eucalyptus

• Add fresh or dried rose petals
• Turn off lights an close the door to keep steam in.
• Light candles, and a small stick of incense.
• Place crystals around your tub if you have them.
• If you have a wooden bath brush or loofah, brush the whole body away from the heart to stimulate your lymphatic system.
• Soak in your warm Epsom salt love-bath for 30 minutes or up to 1 hour.
• Dry off with warm clean towels and rub rose body oil, sesame, or coconut oil all over and let it dry before an amazing sleep.

rose petals and oil

dawn in tub with crystals and roses

Yes, this is me, with dried roses, candles and crystals. The dried roses can make the bath a little purple!

 

Warmest Valentine’s Day to all, today and everyday!

marscapone cake

My native Swedish husband’s birthday is on Feb. 3, so every super bowl Sunday, I make him this giant cake. It’s a version of  Swedish Midsommartårta, or Midsummer Cake, and, however decadent, I have adapted it to make a somewhat healthier version. I use an organic yellow/ lemon cake base, with added cream and lemon juice and a Mascarpone cheese and whipped cream frosting, that’s virtually unsweetened. I call this my lotus mandala cake, of course!

Ingredients for the cake:

2 packets of organic lemon cake mix
6 organic eggs
1 cup of vegetable oil/ melted vegan butter or coconut oil
4T organic lemon juice
4T organic heavy cream

For the mascarpone whipped cream frosting:

8-9 ounces (224g) mascarpone cheese, softened to room temperature
1T granulated monkfruit sugar
1 and 1/2 cups of heavy whipping cream
1 teaspoon vanilla extract

For the topping:

1/2 cup blueberries
2 cups sliced organic strawberries
1/2 cup glazed cherry topping/ pie filling
1 cup organic sliced almonds

For the filling:

1/2 cup mascarpone whipped cream frosting
1 cups blended cherries from remaining glaze

cake ingredients

Try to source the healthiest, organic foods!

 

 

cake

Pour 2T of heavy cream and 2T of lemon juice directly onto each layer of cake to let it soak in. This is the secret to juicy, non-dry cakes

Instructions:

1. Preheat the oven to 350°F (180°C). Grease two 9×2 inch (23×5 cm) cake pans or spring-form pans with nonstick spray. Set aside.

For the cake batter:

1. Using an electric mixer, beat flour, eggs and oil on medium-high speed until creamy.
2. Pour batter evenly into the 2 prepared cake pans and bake for about 25 minutes or until a toothpick inserted in the center comes out clean.
3. Remove from the oven and allow to cool completely before assembling the cake.

For the frosting:

1. Using an electric mixer, beat mascarpone cheese and heavy whipping cream together on medium speed until no lumps remain, about 3 full minutes.
2. Add the monkfruit sugar, and vanilla extract. Increase to high speed and beat for 3 minutes.

For the filling and assembling the cake:

1. Place 1 layer on a flat plate.
2. Pour 2T of heavy cream and 2T of lemon juice directly onto each layer of cake to let it soak in. This is the secret to juicy, non-dry cakes!
3. Evenly cover the top with the whipped frosting, then add a layer of blended cherries.
4. Top with 2nd layer, and cover with more frosting, on top with glazed cherries, blueberries and sliced strawberries in a mandala pattern and if desired, sliced almonds stuck to the sides by taking a small handful and kind of gently “slapping” them into the cream. Refrigerate for at least 45 minutes before serving, so that it sets.

 

lemon cake

marscapone cake

Swedish Lemon Mascarpone Cake

My native Swedish husband's birthday is on Feb. 3, so every super bowl Sunday, I make him this giant cake. It's a version of  Swedish Midsommartårta, or Midsummer Cake, and, however decadent, I have adapted it to make a somewhat healthier version. I use an organic yellow/ lemon cake base, with added cream and lemon juice and a Mascarpone cheese and whipped cream frosting, that's virtually unsweetened. I call this my lotus mandala cake, of course!
5 from 2 votes

Ingredients
  

  • 2 packets of organic lemon cake mix
  • 6 organic eggs
  • 1 cup of vegetable oil/ melted vegan butter or coconut oil
  • 4 T organic lemon juice
  • 4 T organic heavy cream
  • For the mascarpone whipped cream frosting:
  • 8-9 ounces 224g mascarpone cheese, softened to room temperature
  • 1 T granulated monkfruit sugar
  • 1 and 1/2 cups of heavy whipping cream
  • 1 teaspoon vanilla extract
  • For the topping:
  • 1/2 cup blueberries
  • 2 cups sliced organic strawberries
  • 1/2 cup glazed cherry topping/ pie filling
  • 1 cup organic sliced almonds
  • For the filling:
  • 1/2 cup mascarpone whipped cream frosting
  • 1 cups blended cherries from remaining glaze

Instructions
 

  • Preheat the oven to 350°F (180°C). Grease two 9×2 inch (23×5 cm) cake pans or springform pans with nonstick spray. Set aside.
  • For the cake batter:
  • Using an electric mixer, beat flour, eggs and oil on medium-high speed until creamy.
  • Pour batter evenly into the 2 prepared cake pans and bake for about 25 minutes or until a toothpick inserted in the center comes out clean. Remove from the oven and allow to cool completely before assembling the cake.
  • For the frosting:
  • Using an electric mixer, beat mascarpone cheese and heavy whipping cream together on medium speed until no lumps remain, about 3 full minutes.
  • Add the monkfruit sugar, and vanilla extract. Increase to high speed and beat for 3 minutes.
  • For the filling and assembling the cake:
  • Place 1 layer on a flat plate.
  • Pour 2T of heavy cream and 2T of lemon juice directly onto each layer of cake to let it soak in. This is the secret to juicy, non-dry cakes!
  • Evenly cover the top with the whipped frosting, then add a layer of blended cherries.
  • Top with 2nd layer, and cover with more frosting, on top with glazed cherries, blueberries and sliced strawberries in a mandala pattern and if desired, sliced almonds stuck to the sides by taking a small handful and kind of gently "slapping" them into the cream. Refrigerate for at least 45 minutes before serving, so that it sets.

falukorv

Falukorv is a Swedish staple, comfort food and even though we don’t eat pork, my family insists for me to make this regularly. Falukorv is a traditional Swedish smoked sausage that is made with potato starch and spices, kind of like a giant sausage Hebrew National Beef Frank. We’ve made a vegetarian version this stuffed sausage recipe using a mushroom protein base roast, that’s already perfectly formed into the needed sausage shape!

Ingredients:

2 packets defrosted Quorn™ vegetarian meatless “turkey” roast, 900g if you are in Sweden, use this.
2T olive oil
1 apple, sliced
1 yellow or red onion, sliced
3 roma tomatoes sliced
4T Dijon mustard
1 cup heavy cream
½ cup grated white cheddar cheese
4T chili sauce
chopped parsley for garnish

quorn roast

Side dishes:
organic steamed peas, organic mashed potatoes or boiled potatoes with skin on. Here is another vegan sausage that’s only available in Sweden, but you can see how it is sliced and stuffed with tomatoes, onions and apples.

veg sausage

https://theveganswedes.blogspot.com/2012/04/vegan-oven-baked-gratinated-falu.html

Directions:

Preheat oven to 400 degrees and boil the potatoes and peas.

Cut slits about three quarters of the way into the roasts, about ½-inch apart. Do not cut all the way through, the  roast should still be connected in one piece.

Pour olive oil onto the bottom of a baking dish or heat-resistant round pan.

Carefully slice apples and stick them into every other slit.

Stick the sliced onions them into the remaining slits.

Add the thin slices of tomatoes and add them to whichever slits you can.

If you can’t fit all the apples, onions and tomatoes, just spread them over the roast.

Mix the mustard and heavy cream together and spread over the roast.

Top the veg. Falukorv with chili sauce and then grated cheese.

Bake the veg. Falukorv for 20 minutes, until browned.

Remove from oven and garnish with chopped parsley. Serve and enjoy!

falukorv

Swedish Vegetarian Falukorv

Falukorv is a Swedish staple, comfort food and even though we don't eat pork, my family insists for me to make this regularly. Falukorv is a traditional Swedish smoked sausage that is made with potato starch and spices kind of like a giant sausage Hebrew National Beef Frank. We've made a vegetarian version this stuffed sausage recipe using a mushroom protein base roast, that's already perfectly formed into the needed sausage shape!

Ingredients
  

  • 2 packets defrosted Quorn™ vegetarian meatless "turkey" roast 900g if you are in Sweden, use this.
  • 2 T olive oil
  • 1 apple sliced
  • 1 yellow or red onion sliced
  • 3 roma tomatoes sliced
  • 4 T Dijon mustard
  • 1 cup heavy cream
  • ½ cup grated white cheddar cheese
  • 4 T chili sauce
  • chopped parsley for garnish

Instructions
 

  • Cut slits about three quarters of the way into the roasts, about ½-inch apart. Do not cut all the way through, the  roast should still be connected in one piece.
  • Pour olive oil onto the bottom of a baking dish or heat-resistant round pan.
  • Carefully sliced apples  and stick them into every other slit.
  • Stick the sliced onions them into the remaining slits.
  • Add the thin slices of tomatoes and add them to whichever slits you can.
  • If you can’t fit all the apples, onions and tomatoes, just spread them over the roast.
  • Mix the mustard and heavy cream together and spread over the roasts.
  • Top the Veg. Falukorv with chili sauce and then grated cheese.
  • Bake the Veg. Falukorv for 20 minutes, until browned.
  • Remove from oven and garnish with chopped parsley. Serve and enjoy!

 

Including: four stages of wind disturbance along the spiritual path

(a special contribution by Segyu Choepel Rinpoche)

By Carolyn Chan

A grasp of the three humors: wind, bile, and phlegm, (tib. rlung, mkhrispa and badken), and their relationship to the development and functioning of the body-mind, underlies any understanding of Tibetan medicine. Good health which also includes mental and emotional wellbeing, depends on their balance, and because each person is different, the point of humoral balance varies from person to person. In western societies, the balancing of rlung has been problematic, with the modern high performance, furious paced lifestyle proving fertile spawning ground for numerous rlung disorders, many conveniently labelled “stress related”.

Over the past year I have had many chances to observe rlung disorders up close, as three of my close friends manifested symptoms and suffered terribly for many months. (Names changed to protect identity). Debra, after an unpleasant medical diagnosis, spiraled uncontrollably into anxiety, sleeplessness, panic attacks and rapid weight loss. Though her diagnosis pointed to something potentially serious, it was at a curable stage, and she planned to start treatment right away. She said she knew all this, but couldn’t seem to help herself. Then there was Linda, whose daughter had taken up a new set of friends and been in trouble twice at school. Linda like Debra, became anxious, sleepless, and full of fears that left her incapable of even simple tasks such as driving to the supermarket or clearing her mailbox. Both said they knew the root of the problem was their own minds, but neither were able to control the irrational thoughts which persisted. Ray was different, he had been experiencing a sharp stabbing pain on his right side for over a month. His doctor had sent him for a battery of medical tests and scans which turned up nothing, leaving him with the suggestion that it “must be muscular”. This was unhelpful to Ray who had been trying to sleep nights sitting up in a chair for a month. I told him about “drang rlung”, the cold abdominal wind, and though a cynic about all things esoteric, he dutifully followed instructions. After a few days his pain started to move, sometimes to his side, then to his back, till it gradually lessened and went away after another long month.

It was painful watching my friends suffer through these disorders. I learnt the big lesson that once a rLung disorder takes hold firmly, it is very difficult to displace and requires vast knowledge and understanding of the nature of rlung and its effects on the body-mind, to successfully treat at its root. My rudimentary knowledge of Tibetan medicine coupled with even less experience was not enough. I realized that while more obvious gross physical wind symptoms such as Ray’s pain, or the shrinking, drying skin and crooked arthritic joints of the elderly can be easily discerned, what is not obvious but just as painful, is the suffering of the mind caused by a rlung disorder.

It was with a view to learning more about the ubiquitous rlung disorder and its subtle effects on the body-mind that I spoke recently with Segyu Choepel Rinpoche, holder of the Tibetan Buddhist Segyu lineage of the Gelug school. Rinpoche has an extraordinarily rich, colorful background and is considered an expert in Transpersonal psychology as well as the healing traditions of his homeland, Brazil. With his deep roots in Tibetan Buddhist traditions and great personal interest and expertise in “treating holistically rather than specifically”[1], Rinpoche was naturally drawn to Tibetan medicine[2]. Rinpoche is very approachable, with a warm dimpled smile and kind twinkling eyes that see everything, including the questions you really want to ask. A razor sharp intellect quickly organizes his answers into bite size pieces to be chewed and digested by novices, such as myself. While I was particularly interested in Rinpoche’s perspective on rlung disorders in western society, I had the extreme good fortune of receiving much more, as Rinpoche shared his insight and knowledge of rlung disorders commonly found on the spiritual path. Rinpoche says that while rLung disorders are found in the general population, he observed some time ago that there seems to be a disproportionately higher incidence occurring in dharma centers. It is his opinion that the reason for this is because on top of any psychological problems that may be present in an individual, Vajrayana practices may further disturb the person’s rLung, as “spiritual practices go to the core of neuroses”.

tsa lung

According to Rinpoche, there are four stages of wind disturbance, which can take place along the spiritual path.

1.    Prior to spiritual practice.
Person recognizes their own emotional disturbance or psychological imbalance and goes to the dharma looking for solutions. The disturbance may manifest as unhappiness, depression, anger and aggression, and basic inability to deal with situations encountered in daily living. There is inability to control winds in the channels and blockages are present in their most gross form.

2.    Early in spiritual practice.
Person starts dharma practice and feels different, calmer, and is happy to have found a way to calm emotional disturbances. Spiritual practices create movement of the winds, in some cases it may increase the winds. The channel blocks remain and disharmony and agitation of the winds continue. The practitioner is however learning how to calm the mind and mental afflictions so there are less bouts of anger, craving, jealousy, etc., and the wind disorder manifests at a more subtle mental level as depression, agitation, insomnia, “spaciness”, and psychological angers.

3.    Seasoned spiritual practitioner.
After some time and effort in the practice, the person’s reaction to the practice is noticeable in resultant behavioral changes that have been incorporated into daily life. For example, the person has become more patient, kind, and compassionate in dealing with others, and because of these changes and knowledge gained, may even become sought after as meditation or dharma teachers. However, even with long spiritual practice that include purification practices, subtle blockages can remain. These blockages become more subtle, continuing to agitate the mind at a mental level, and the disorders above in #2 can persist in more subtle or hidden manner. It becomes difficult to eliminate these subtle blockages as due to prolonged spiritual practice the mental condition is very strong.

4.    Advanced spiritual practice
Where a practitioner is very advanced in spiritual practice, blockages can still exist, but they will exist at an extremely subtle level. They will therefore be very silent and very deep blockages. At this level the only way to uproot the blocks will be through a process of transmutation to the completion stage of complete enlightenment, where the rLung flows freely and easily through the body channels (tsa), “tsalung therapy”.

Experienced Doctors of Tibetan medicine are able to identify and calm the disturbed winds of the more gross types of wind disorders, using the tools of diet, behavior, medicines and external therapies. However, as practitioners advance in spiritual practice, channel blockages can become increasingly subtle. Where subtle blockages exist, practitioners may seek Tsalung trulkhor therapy (rtsa rlung ‘khrul ‘khor), which can restore natural channel function by cleaning the channels and removing blocks. Tsalung therapy is an advanced body-mind healing practice in Tibetan Tantric yoga meditation, where by tradition, its practice is restricted to only highly qualified Tantric practitioners.
Rinpoche is of the opinion that many western doctors do not understand the nature of the disorder, and therefore do not address the winds, ending up only treating the symptoms. Doctors of Tibetan medicine who are capable of diagnosing and treating the disorders effectively, are simply not available.
I am extremely grateful to Rinpoche for sharing his views on rlung disorders on the spiritual path. I believe this insightful breakdown can be most helpful in understanding the type of wind disorder present, and the most effective therapy to be applied. It seems obvious to me, that Doctors of Tibetan medicine with their long experience of dealing with rlung, should be considered as experts in this field. They are capable of rendering invaluable assistance to people living in western societies where rlung disorders are becoming increasingly commonplace.

 FOR CURES, SUGGESTIONS AND REMEDIES, SEE HERE and HERE.


[1] Since 2003, through Juniper Foundation in California, Rinpoche has been fulfilling the instructions of his root teacher Kyabje Lati Rinpoche (1922-2010), which were to, “…focus on the west, make the essence of Mahayana Buddhism available and accessible to the people over there”.

[2]Rinpoche recalls in 2010, his serendipitous encounter with an advertisement for the TME 3 year online course, which was just about to start. Rinpoche completed the 3-year course and is currently enrolled in the Advanced TME online course. Rinpoche speaks openly of his “pristine admiration”, for his teacher of Tibetan medicine, Dr. Pasang Y. Arya, and the ability with which he is able to “translate, update, and transmit Tibetan medicine in its true form to the west”.

Source

https://www.tibetanmedicine-edu.org/index.php/n-articles/disturbed-wind

Photo by Shashank Kumawat from Pexels
Photo by KoolShooters from Pexels

The Urban Homestead

So, with all of us being home-bound, a lot of us are taking up more domestic tasks like homesteading and gardening. My family and I put in a series of automatic drip irrigation  4′ x 8′ prefab. gardening boxes outside, and were able to harvest quite a bit of fresh organic vegetables this summer into the fall. We also live in a suburban/semi rural neighborhood, our subdivision allows us to have up to five backyard chickens with no roosters (too noisy for the neighbors around 4:30 am!). So during our isolation we became pretty good farmers and were able to harvest fresh, live foods and organic chicken eggs right from the backyard!

During the winter months I was missing all of the fresh vegetables decided to try to grow the most easy to grow indoor foods and that is… to start an at home sprout garden. There’s nothing that compares to eating food that you grow directly and that is still alive, it is so easy and you too could start your own at home winter sprout garden and have living food within five days! This is how to do it.

How to Sprout Seeds at Home

First and foremost you should purchase quality jars or sprouting trays. I make sure to clean and disinfect them really well before use. Make sure to buy well sourced organic seeds. Follow all safety guidelines and directions here.

You can buy jars here. You can buy high quality sprout seeds here or here.

I chose two different types, one was a protein mix and one was a five-part salad mix for variety:

5 Part Salad Mix sprouting seeds offers the tame and mild flavors of alfalfa and mung, the verdant and healthy sulforaphane of broccoli sprouts, and a spicy finish from radish and green lentil seeds.

Organic Garbanzo Beans, Organic Adzuki Beans, Organic Mung Beans, Organic Green Peas.

sprout tools

Clean and disinfect your container and then measure out the exact amount based on that container for each of the sprouting jars, it was only about 2 tablespoons of seeds per crop.

Then, you rinse the seeds and drain the water. Then, put in about three-1 parts more lukewarm water in the jars and let them soak overnight for about eight hours.

The next morning, drain out all the water and if you use the jars, they have a mesh filter for easy draining such that you won’t lose any of the small seeds.

sprout jars in sun

Next, you will take the seeds and leave them overnight in a dark area like a cabinet. The sprouting process will actually occur in the darkness.

During the next two days, rinse and drain them 2 to 3 times a day thoroughly and set them, slightly tilted downward in a window to absorb a little bit of sunlight to enhance the chlorophyll. Be very gentle during the draining process as to not damaged the fragile sprouts that are just emerging.

In 4 to 5 days depending upon the sprouts, you should have a full garden that’s ready to eat! Store in the refrigerator at a cool temperature once they are grown, just like you would any other salad greens or sprouts. Voilà, a home winter garden of fresh greens!

sprouts-done

Here are some innovative ideas for sprout recipes.

 

Image by Virtual Stylist from Pixabay

Written by Jampa Mackenzie Stewart, M.S.O.M., L.AC.

The term Qigong Deviations refers to the adverse reactions that may occur in the course of Qigong training. These reactions can be physical, energetic, and/or mental.

Qigong is like medicine. It can be tremendously healing if prescribed correctly and used according to directions, but if you are careless in how you practice and do not treat it with respect, you can incur negative side effects.

Common causes of Qigong deviations are:

1. Exercising or practicing under the guidance of an inexperienced teacher or a teacher who is ignorant of Qigong theory, or imitating a Qigong exercise without understanding Qigong principles or without instruction (imitating Qigong seen in a movie, magazine, book or video).
2. Attempting to guide Qi internally without adequate fitness or preparation. This can occur due to a weak constitution, faulty posture or due to trying to forcefully circulate Qi when one has weak or blocked energy channels.
3. Failing to respond to the flow of Qi or Qi sensations correctly or overreaction due to fear, ignorance, being overly anxious for results, or due to psycho-emotional imbalances.
4. Failing to master and apply the “three regulations”, failing to follow the teacher’s directions or to practice according to the given guidance, or following one’s inclinations to “improvise” on Qigong exercises prematurely without sufficient mastery and understanding of the principles and safeguards.
5. Being frightened, startled (such as telephone suddenly ringing, abrupt loud noise, etc.) or suddenly irritated or vexed during Qigong practice.
6. Practicing Qigong in a toxic environment or during extremes of weather, such as wind, cold, heat, dryness, thunderstorms, right after an earthquake, etc.
7. Excessively practicing Qigong (too long, too much force, too much tension, over- concentration) out of fanaticism, or impatience for quick and dramatic results; overdosing on Qigong.

The following are the major differentiations of Qigong deviations:

1. Deranged Qi Flow
2. Qi and/or Blood Stagnation
3. Leaking of True Qi
4. Mental Derangement
5. Unchecked Flow of Pathogenic Qi

1. Deranged Qi Flow

Symptoms

Qi may become deranged, pathological, or out of control either during or after Qigong practice. Deranged Qi flow may give rise to symptoms such as dizziness, vertigo, panic, respiratory distress, palpitations, shortness of breath, uncontrolled movements of the extremities, tremors of the whole body, suddenly feeling faint. It may also cause intense, uncomfortable, uncontrollable and unstoppable sensations of Qi flow along a certain channel or channels, or these sensations may be confined to a specific location. In most cases, the person will be able to tell the location and direction of the pathological Qi flow.

Self-Treatment

a) Stop the Qigong exercises which have caused the symptoms.
b) Stop any panic, calm down, and shift your focus of attention to conscious movements.

c) For dizziness or vertigo, press and rub Baihui (Du-20), Hanyan (GB-4), Shuaigu (GB-8), and Xuanlu (GB-5), followed by kneading Taiyang, digging and pressing Fengchi (GB-20), and pressing Mingmen (Du-4).
d) For respiratory distress, palpitations and shortness of breath, finger-knead Shanzhong(Ren-17), Rugen (ST-18), Yunmen (LU-4), Zhongfu (LU-1), and Neiguan (PC-6).
e) For sudden faintness, press Yintang (Extra) with your fingertip, then press Renzhong

(Du-26) with your fingernail, dig-grasp Hegu (LI-4) with your thumb, and Zusanli (ST-36) with your middle fingertip. Follow this treatment with a cup of warm tea, and guide the Qi back to the Dantian. Place your two palms over the Dantian as you guide the Qi there.

f) For excess Qi flow or intense Qi sensation, first pat the locations where the Qi is flowing or gathering to excess. Then pat the face, scalp, neck, chest, and back.

Next, extend your right arm in front of you, palm up, and massage the Three Yin Channels of the arm by lightly brushing with your left palm and fingers down the inside of your right arm from your shoulder to your fingertips. Then turn your right hand palm down, and massage the Three Yang Channels of the arms by using your left hand to brush up your right arm from fingertips to shoulder over the back of your hand and up the back of your arm.

Repeat 9 times altogether. Then do the same procedure on the opposite side.

Next, massage down the Three Yang Channels of the legs by using both palms to lightly brush down the outside and back of the buttocks, flanks and legs to the toes. Then massage up the Three Yin Channels of the legs by brushing from the big toes up the inside of the foot, ankle, calf, knee, thigh and groin. Repeat 9 times altogether.

g) If none of the above self-treatments work, one should immediately seek out a reputable Qigong doctor or practitioner of Oriental medicine for treatment.

Outgoing Qi Therapy

  1. a)  Open the confluent points of the Eight Extraordinary Vessels in accordance with the Eight Methods of the Sacred Tortoise (Ling Gui Ba Fa) and its rules for point selection according to the hour of treatment and the stem and branch of the day of treatment.
  2. b)  Select relevant points along the affected channels. Use flat palm or sword hand gestures and apply pushing, pulling, and quivering manipulations to activate and normalize the Qi flow along the disordered and related channels.
  3. c)  After that, apply pushing and leading manipulations to guide the Qi along the related channel or to the related organ, or back to the Dantian.
  4. d)  Regulate the activities

Herbal Treatment

The following herbal formula may be prescribed with appropriate modifications, and decocted in water for oral administration (dose per day):

Dang Gui (Radix Angelica Sinensis) 12g Ci Shi (Magnetitum) 30g Niu Xi (Radix Achyranthes Bidentatae) 18g Shan Yu Rou (Frutus Corni) 15g Sheng Long Gu (Os Draconis) 30g Sheng Mu Li (Concha Ostreae) 30g

2. Qi and/or Blood Stagnation

Symptoms

Qi and/or Blood Stagnation may occur either during or after Qigong practice. Qi and/or Blood Stagnation may give rise to symptoms of pain, heaviness, sore and distending sensations and sensations of compression, which may not disappear automatically, and may become worse if not treated.

Outgoing Qi Therapy

1. a) Select appropriate local acupoints at and around the affected location of the problem. Tap and knead the points digitally, and push and stroke along the channel along the natural direction of the affected channel’s flow.

  1. b)  Use flat palm hand gesture along with pushing, pulling, leading and quivering manipulations to dredge the channels and to guide and normalize the functional flow of Qi in the channel along the natural direction of the affected channel’s flow.
  2. c)  Refer to Qigong Empowerment, pp. 311-316 for additional treatments for problems at specific locations.

Self-Treatment

  1. a)  Stop the Qigong exercises which have caused the symptoms.
  2. b)  If you feel a compressing sensation on the head along with severe headache, massageGV-20 (Bai Hui), GB-20 (Fengchi), Tianmen (Extra), Kangong, and Taiyang (Extra). Then pat and massage along the natural direction of the Governing and Conception Vessels. Then concentrate the mind on KD-1 (Yongquan) and LV-1 (Dadun) and continue with the face and head massages above.
  3. c)  If you feel a tight and compressed sensation at the forehead, first massage Tianmen (Extra), Kangong, and Taiyang (Extra), and then pat from GV-20 (Bai Hui) down to CV-6 (Qihai, Dantian) along the Conception Vessel several times until you feel the energy descend and the pain reduced. Then apply pushing massage from GV-20 (Bai Hui) down to CV-6 (Qihai, Dantian) several times.
  4. d)  For distending pain around GV-14 (Dazhui), press-knead GV-14 (Dazhui), GV-16 (Fengfu), GB-20 (Fengchi), and GV-6 (Jizhong), and pat downwards along the Governing Vessel and Bladder Channels several times.
  5. e)  Continue to push, rub, knead and pat the painful and uncomfortable areas.

Herbal Treatment

The following herbal formula may be prescribed with appropriate modifications:

  • Dang Gui (Radix Angelica Sinensis) 12g
  • Tao Ren (Semen Persica) 9g
  • Hong Hua (Flos Carthamus) 9g
  • Yan Hu Suo (Rhizoma Corydalis) 12g
  • Lu Lu Tong (Fructus Liquidambaris) 30g
  • Niu Xi (Radix Achyranthes) 18g
  • Si Gua Luo (Retinervus Luffae Fructus) 9g

3. Leaking of True Qi

Symptoms

During or after Qigong practice, one may feel Qi leaking out of their external genitalia, anus, or urethral orifice, and other points. Leaking of True Qi may lead to wasting, weakness of the extremities, pale grayish and dark complexion, vexation, lack of concentration, impaired memory, spontaneous sweating, night sweats, pathological seminal emission, insomnia, and reluctance to speak or move.
Outgoing Qi Therapy

  1. a)  Emit Qi with flat palm gesture and pushing, pulling and quivering manipulations towards CV-6 (Qihai; Dantian) and GV-4 (Mingmen).
  2. b)  Again emit Qi to CV-6 (Qihai; Dantian) with flat palm gesture and vibrating and quivering manipulations for 9 or 18 breath cycles.

Self-Treatment

a) Knead Zhongwan (Ren 12), Qi Hai (Ren 6), and Guan Yuan (Ren 4); push and rub the abdomen; knead Shen Shu (BL 23).

b) Concentrate your mind on your Dan Tian for 5-10 minutes.

c) Inhale quickly through your nose and simultaneously contract your anus and PC (pubococcygeal) muscles. Hold for 10 seconds, then exhale and relax those muscles. Repeat 9 times.

d) Knock your teeth together 36 times.

e) Roll your tongue around in your mouth 18 times to generate saliva. Accumulate the saliva, and then swallow forcefully in three gulps. Rest.

f) Massage your Ming Men 49 times. Then pat your torso and limbs.

Herbal Treatment

The following herbal formula may be prescribed with modifications: Shu Di Huang (Prepared Rehmanniae) 30g
Ren Shen (Radix Ginseng) 9g
Shan Yu Rou (Cornus Fruit) 30g

Ci Shi (Magnetitum) 30g Rou Gui (Cinnamon Bark) 6g Niu Xi (Radix Achyranthes) 18g Shen Long Gu (Os Draconis) 30g Mu Li (Oyster Shell) 30g

4. Mental Derangement (Qigong Psychosis)

Symptoms

Most participants report profound health and wellbeing benefits from qigong practices; many achieve significant relief from longstanding physical or psychiatric ailments.

Some, however, may develop a syndrome known as qigong psychotic reaction, described by DSM-IV as “an acute, time-limited episode characterized by dissociative, paranoid, or other psychotic or non-psychotic symptoms”, and that “especially vulnerable are individuals who become overly involved” in qigong.

During Qigong practice, mental derangement (also called Ru Mo, “being infatuated” or “Zou Hou Ru Mo”, “fire [qi] wild, devils enter”), or simply “Shen disturbance” may appear.

Mental derangement of this type is usually the result of overzealous and excessive practice, or in practicing to a fanatical degree. It also occurs in practitioners who regard the extraordinary sensory or mental perceptions experienced during Qigong as real. It may manifest in either a Yin or Yang form.

In Yin Qigong Psychosis, the patient’s Qi will be compressed; the patient may become withdrawn, depressed, introverted and uncommunicative, exhibiting an eccentric disposition, a withered and dull expression and appearance, idle movement, apathy, and trance. The patient’s eyes may appear clouded, may avoid direct eye contact, or the eyes may waver from side to side.

In Yang Qigong Psychosis, the patient’s Qi may become stuck in the head or heart, the patient may exhibit manic, overly expressive, impulsive or volatile behavior, over-talkativeness, incomprehensible or inappropriate speech or laughter, inappropriate expression of feelings, insomnia. The patient’s eyes may become burning, piercing and fiery.

With both types of qigong psychosis, some practitioners may lose self-confidence to the extreme of becoming suicidal; others may experience disorientation, and continuous auditory and visual hallucinations similar to those experienced in schizophrenia and other forms of acute psychosis.

Generally speaking, most of these disorders are related to a pathological accumulation of Qi in the head or heart. Both the brain and the heart are related to Shen and consciousness, and are Yang in nature. The over-accumulation of Qi in these centers may either over-activate (Yang) or cloud (Yin) the mind. In either case, the basic treatment principle is to ground the patient, to guide the Qi down to the Lower Dantian, and to regulate the Qi.

Outgoing Qi Therapy

  1. a)  Open the confluent points of the Eight Extraordinary Vessels in accordance with the Eight Methods of the Sacred Tortoise (Ling Gui Ba Fa) and its rules for point selection according to the hour of treatment and the stem and branch of the day of treatment.
  2. b)  Press and knead GV-20 (Baihui), GV-14 (Dazhui), GV-10 (Lingtai), and BL-13 (Feishu). Then use either flat palm or sword finger gestures and pushing, pulling, and quivering manipulations to emit Qi and guide Qi to flow down the Governing Vessel.
  3. c)  Pinch GV-20 (Baihui), Yintang, GV-26 (Renzhong), SI-19 (Tinggong), ST-6 (Jiache), LI-11 (Quchi), LI-4 (Hegu), BL-40 (Weizhong), and BL-57 (Chengshan).

     4. d) Use middle finger propping gesture and vibrating manipulation to emit Qi toward CV-15 (Jiawei) and CV-12 (Zhongwan) for a period of 18 normal respirations. Then guide the Qi downwards along the Conception Vessel back to the Lower Dantian.

Self-Treatment

a) Stop the Qigong exercises which have caused the symptoms.

b) Apply Qigong massage according to the symptoms: knead Taiyang (Extra) and Bai Hui (Du 20), pat along the spinal column and Bladder Channel from upper to lower, and pat the back and extremities.

c) Guide the Qi from the head down the Conception Vessel to the navel. Collect the Qi at the navel by spiraling outwardly 36 times (clockwise for males, counter-clockwise for females) and inwardly 24 times (counter-clockwise for males, counter-clockwise for females).

Herbal Treatment

The following herbal formula may be prescribed with appropriate modifications:

  • Sheng Di Huang (Fresh Rehmannia) 30g
  • Bai He (Lily Bulb) 30g
  • Sheng Long Gu (Dragon Bone) 30g
  • Sheng Mu Li (Oyster Shell) 30g
  • Niu Xi (Achyranthes Root) 15g
  • Yuan Zhi (Polygala Root) 12g
  • Suan Zao Ren (Zizyphus Seed) 12g
  • Ci Shi (Magnetite) 30g
  • Shan Yu Rou (Cornus Fruit) 30g
  • Zhu Sha (Cinnabar) 1g (taken following it’s infusion)

5. Unchecked Flow of Pathogenic Qi

In healthy practitioners, there may be a struggle between the righteous healthy Qi and pathogenic Qi during exercise. Because the righteous Qi is reinforced due to Qigong practice, the pathogenic Qi may flow unchecked to certain locations and cause pain, soreness, distention, heaviness, coldness and heat.

Outgoing Qi Therapy

  1. a)  Press-knead the Jing-well points of the affected channel with your fingernails to open the channels and allow the pathogenic Qi to leave, guiding it out with your mental intent.
  2. b)  Use flat palm gesture and pulling and leading manipulations to guide the pathogenic Qi out. Alternatively, you may open the affected point to dispel the pathogenic Qi.

Self-Treatment

a) Massage the affected areas with digital pressure to relax it fully

b) Inhale naturally. As you exhale, use your will to lead the Qi to the affected location, and imagine the pathogenic Qi is being expelled. Repeat for 49 respiratory cycles.

c) Practice the Hua Shan Qigong exercise, “Expelling Toxins” 9 to 49 times.

 

jampa

https://healingtaoinstitute.com/about.html

by Jampa Mackenzie Stewart, M.S.O.M., L.AC.

Jampa@HealingTaoInstitute.com

Photo:

Uploaded 5491 images

Spanakopita
Spanokopita with a Greek Salad

This Greek classic is a healthy vegetarian main course and a hybrid of my Greek grandpa’s recipe and one from the Colorado yoga retreat center Shoshoni. Serve with Greek Feta and Kalamata Olive, Cucumber and Tomato Salad and Ttzatziki.

 

Ingredients:

2 pounds fresh spinach or two packages of chopped frozen, thawed
1 medium onion, minced
1 tablespoon olive oil
1 cup broccoli florets, chopped
6 oz of Feta Cheese
6 oz of cream cheese
1 teaspoon salt
pinch black pepper
1⁄4 teaspoon nutmeg
1 (1-pound package) filo dough  and 1 stick of melted vegan butter, melted butter or olive oil for brushing filo

Directions:

1. Chop and wash spinach and broccoli and steam in a saute pan. Drain and squeeze out excess moisture. Set aside.

2. Saute onions in olive oil until soft and translucent.

3. Combine onions, feta, cream cheese, salt, pepper, and nutmeg. Mix in cooked spinach and broccoli.

4. To assemble Spanokopita, carefully unroll the filo dough leaves. Lay the sheets flat on a counter, and cover completely with a damp towel, as they can dry quickly. Place a large cutting board or prepare a large clean surface next to the filo, and place a single layer of filo on the board. Lightly brush with melted butter or olive oil. Place one more sheets on the first, brushing each lightly with oil, and covering the sheets each time a sheet is removed. Slice sheets with a sharp knife lengthwise to produce two long strips.

5. Preheat oven to 375°F.

6. Spoon 1⁄2 cup spinach filling onto lower right-hand corner of one of the strips. Fold corner toward left hand edge to form a triangle, sealing the filling. Continue to roll like a flag to the end of the strip until you have a triangle Spanakopita. Brush the outside lightly with butter or oil, and place on a lightly oiled cookie sheet. Make as many as you can until filling is used.

7. Bake for 25 to 30 minutes until lightly golden browned.

spinach pie

spanakopita greek salad

Spanokopita with a Greek Salad

This Greek classic is a main course is a hybrid of my Greek grandpa's recipe and one from the Colorado yoga retreat center Shoshoni. Serve with Greek Feta and Kalamata Olive Salad and Ttzatziki.

Ingredients
  

  • 2 pounds fresh spinach or two packages of chopped frozen thawed
  • 1 medium onion minced
  • 1 tablespoon olive oil
  • 1 cup broccoli florets chopped
  • 6 oz of Feta Cheese
  • 6 oz of cream cheese
  • 1 teaspoon salt
  • pinch black pepper
  • 1 ⁄4 teaspoon nutmeg
  • 1 1-pound package filo dough and 1 stick of melted vegan butter, melted butter or olive oil for brushing filo

Instructions
 

  • Chop and wash spinach and broccoli and steam in a saute pan. Drain and squeeze out excess moisture. Set aside.
  • Saute onions in olive oil until soft and translucent.
  • Combine onions, feta, cream cheese, salt, pepper, and nutmeg. Mix in cooked spinach and broccoli.
  • To assemble Spanokopita, carefully unroll the filo dough leaves. Lay the sheets flat on a counter, and cover completely with a damp towel, as they can dry quickly. Place a large cutting board or prepare a large clean surface next to the filo, and place a single layer of filo on the board. Lightly brush with melted butter or olive oil. Place one more sheets on the first, brushing each lightly with oil, and covering the sheets each time a sheet is removed. Slice sheets with a sharp knife lengthwise to produce two long strips.
  • Preheat oven to 375°F.
  • Spoon 1⁄2 cup spinach filling onto lower right-hand corner of one of the strips. Fold corner toward left hand edge to form a triangle, sealing the filling. Continue to roll like a flag to the end of the strip until you have a triangle Spanakopita. Brush the outside lightly with butter or oil, and place on a lightly oiled cookie sheet. Make as many as you can until filling is used.
  • Bake for 25 to 30 minutes until lightly golden browned.

How It Happened

I volunteer in state politics. It was the night that insurrectionists stormed the Capitol in D.C. I have friends that I love and care for that work there and the fear hit my system really hard. I was doing a solitary retreat and a cleansing new years’s juice fast, which makes you particularly open, feeling and vulnerable to, well, everything. I made the mistake of doing some pretty powerful yogic exercises with breath retention too, that, in retrospect, I should not have been fasting while performing them, a lesson now learned.

That night, with the confluence of everything, I had a full on panic attack. I could not sleep, and it got so bad that my nerves just gave out, shaking, overcome by fear. I could feel this odd overheating going up the spine to my head, pretty classic Kundalini syndrome or what Tibetans call a wind imbalance or Tsog Lung. This struggle went on for 3 nights. I finally broke down and took one exceedingly strong sleeping pill, for one night, that acts also as an anti-convulsant called Clonazepam, that cut the momentum of the fear and got me to sleep. However, I wanted to fix this and come back into balance by myself. I’m happy to say, I found a full cure, and was sleeping soundly by night 4, naturally, with no sleeping pills!

If you ever have your practice go wrong, anxiety or insomnia, or life and fear just hits an overwhelm, I wanted to offer what helped me get through it and come back into balance. I took 5 full days and I limited my work time to do an immersive, home self care intensive to recover. I’m happy to say that I came out better then ever, calm, healed and sleeping soundly.

The Natural Cure

I am not a doctor and cannot offer medical advice. Please do see a doctor, teacher or acupuncturist for professional advice if needed, but here is what helped me:

  1. I called my meditation teachers who know me- and they gave me some personal meditation instructions that I was so grateful for, and told me to discontinue all breath-work and yoga practice for some time.
  2. I went in for a full checkup with blood-work to my medical doctor, got acupuncture and a Ku-nye warm oil massage with a Tibetan Doctor.
  3. I took a relaxing Epsom salt bath twice a day with lavender essential oils in it and then rubbed rose body oil or sesame oil all over head to toe! I dried off and kept my body really warm, extra clothes and blankets, and a fire.
  4. I stopped the juice fast and ate heavy, oily, grounding, deeply nutritive foods- organic bone marrow broth, steamed vegetables with butter.
  5. The Chinese doctor had me take a safe, herbal formula called “Jitters Away”* along with goat’s milk colostrum to mend the nerves. *take with supervision
  6. At night before bed, I took some vitamins and amino acids including: 5htp, Magnesium, Inositol, L-Theanine and Gaba. *Dosages should be taken under the guidance of a functional medicine practitioner.
  7. I rubbed a small amount high quality CBD salve with arnica onto my arm, on the soft spot where the arm bends.
  8. I had this happen on retreat a few years back, so reread the VERY BEST INSOMNIA BOOK, and followed the author’s advice that puts you back on track for sound sleep. In sum, you do a mantra before bed that says: “I’m a good sleeper, my body knows how to sleep.” You can rub you feet together and rub your belly to bring the “energy” down.
  9. I stopped all caffeinated coffee, went to decaf and calming teas like chamomile with natural, non-stimulating sugars like monkfruit or coconut. Before bed, warm milk with Ashwagandha.
  10. I worked out on a elliptical gently each morning and /or went for long gentle walks in the sun, and did some very gentle stretching, sun salutations and hatha yoga.
  11. I listened to calming music and kept my space clean, and fresh. I lit candles and incense at night, with some simple formless meditation.
  12. I shut down ALL social media, and turned off the news for a few days; what wonders that does to heal the nerves!

 

candles

What I Learned

Well, I recall a few years ago the same thing happen to me while I was practicing these intense yogas on retreat. It took me eight months to fully recover and it was hard fought. I wanted to see if the same problem would recur and sure enough it did. I was consulting with the Tibetan medical doctor and he told me that we all have a certain elemental propensity, what they call the humors. Some people have: wind, phlegm or bile imbalances or propensities. People that have a lot of thoughts and ideas and are emotionally sensitive, tend toward having a wind imbalance. It means that your life force energy can quickly move upwards, to the head, and so when you do certain yogic practices this can definitely exacerbate this and cause an imbalance.

I almost think nowadays that the spiritual path is body based and it’s a process of getting to be in touch with yourself physically and emotionally, to notice how you’re doing. We use the analogy of the mastery of being able to “ride the horse” of your life force, rather than have it trample over you. If we’ve taken on too much, heartbreak and stress buildup and can cause insomnia and anxiety or other health problems, like heart disease and ulcers. It’s your body and mind’s way of loudly telling you that you have to go into self-care and give it more support.

Nowadays, with media and 24/7 global television, we can feel everything that’s happening in the world. We all know it’s been a very difficult past few years. Those of us who care and are sensitive can be really affected by these things, so we have to protect our energy and be mindful of how much news we take in, and how much time we spend on social media. We can’t help the world if we are overcome by fear and anxiety.

Self-care, a feeling of inner love, warmth and well-being is the basis with which we can live a full and meaningful life. I realize that if I can take care of myself, support myself, and be in mind/body/spirit balance, that warmth can extend to others. I learned a lot from this process and it developed more of an awareness of how to ground and stay in tune throughout the day. I’m also grateful to know that if anything does happen, any type of trauma, loss or overwhelm, I have this immersive self-care method to calm down and reconnect to myself as an ultimate protection. Try some of these lifestyle changes, and you might find that you are free from anxiety and can sleep very deeply, waking ready for each day!

Wellness wishes to everyone, and if you’d like any more details about what methods I used to heal, please contact me anytime.

Dawn Boiani-Sandberg

https://www.buddhistsomatics.com

 

Photo by Taryn Elliott from Pexels

Potato Galette

Vegetable Potato Galette

A perfect Vegetarian Main Course! Potato galette is a staple in the French countryside. The word “galette” is French and simply means “flat cake.” Serve for dinner as a vegetarian main course with a side salad, for lunch, or as a brunch side dish. This recipe includes mushrooms, peppers and onions, but you can simply use sliced onions.

Ingredients:

• 1/3 cup olive or coconut oil
• 1-1/2 lb. (about 5 medium) organic potatoes such as Yukon Gold, washed, peel if you like
• 1 tsp. salt
• 1/2 large onion or (1 medium), diced
• 1/2 red or orange pepper, diced
• 6 baby portobello mushrooms sliced
• 3 medium cloves garlic, very coarsely chopped (optional)
• 6 large eggs
• 1/8 tsp./pinch freshly ground black pepper
• 5 tablespoons/ 1/3 cup of grated Parmesan cheese.

Potato Galette

Preparation:

• Preheat Oven to 375 degrees.
• In a 10-12” nonstick skillet that’s at least 1-1/2 inches deep, heat the oil on medium high. While the oil is heating, slice the potatoes thinly, and lightly fry with oil and salt, turning once, do not burn. Remove and set aside.
• Add the onions, peppers, mushrooms and garlic (if using) to the pan. Fry, stirring occasionally, until the onions are very soft and translucent.
• In a large bowl, beat the eggs, 1/4 tsp. salt, and the pepper with a whisk.
• Mix the cooked potatoes, onions, mushrooms, peppers and garlic and layer into a baking dish.
• Pour the egg mixture onto the potatoes and spread.
• Top with Parmesan cheese and bake for 30 minutes, until golden brown on the top.

potateo gallette

Vegetable Potato Galette

A perfect Vegetarian Main Course! Potato galette is a staple in the French countryside. The word “galette” is French and simply means "flat cake." Serve for dinner as a vegetarian main course with a side salad, for lunch, or as a brunch side dish. This recipe includes mushrooms, peppers and onions, but you can simply use sliced onions.

Ingredients
  

  • 1/3 cup olive or coconut oil
  • 1-1/2 lb. about 5 medium organic potatoes such as Yukon Gold, washed, peel if you like
  • 1 tsp. salt
  • 1/2 large onion or 1 medium, diced
  • 1/2 red or orange pepper diced
  • 6 baby portobello mushrooms sliced
  • 3 medium cloves garlic very coarsely chopped (optional)
  • 6 large eggs
  • 1/8 tsp./pinch freshly ground black pepper
  • 5 tablespoons/ 1/3 cup of grated Parmesan cheese.

Instructions
 

  • Preheat Oven to 375 degrees.
  • In a 10-12” nonstick skillet that’s at least 1-1/2 inches deep, heat the oil on medium high. While the oil is heating, slice the potatoes thinly, and lightly fry with oil and salt, turning once, do not burn. Remove and set aside.
  • Add the onions, peppers, mushrooms and garlic (if using) to the pan. Fry, stirring occasionally, until the onions are very soft and translucent.
  • In a large bowl, beat the eggs, 1/4 tsp. salt, and the pepper with a whisk.
  • Mix the cooked potatoes, onions, mushrooms, peppers and garlic and layer into a baking dish.
  • Pour the egg mixture onto the potatoes and spread.
  • Top with Parmesan cheese and bake for 30 minutes, until golden brown on the top.

 

 

Flourless Chocolate Lava Cake

Flourless Chocolate Lava Cake with Vegan Butter

This super easy 4 ingredient lava cake is a gourmet family favorite, that you can whip up in 30 minutes or less! It works well with vegan butter and coconut sugar, but regular butter and sugar can be substituted 1-1. Serves 5.

Ingredients

• 8 ounces (1 and 1/2 cups) bittersweet chocolate chips
• 12 tablespoons (one stick and 1/2) vegan butter
• 4 large organic eggs or 5 medium
• 1/2 cup granulated coconut sugar
• 1/8 teaspoon/pinch salt, omit if using salted butter

Chocolate Lava Cake

Directions

1. Preheat oven to 375°F. Vegan butter coat/ spray to oil five small ramekins.

 If you don’t have ramekins, you can use a muffin tin.
2. Melt chocolate with vegan butter, stirring occasionally, until melted and smooth. Remove from heat.
3. 
While chocolate is melting, whip eggs, coconut sugar, and salt on medium-high speed until mixture is fluffy, about 5 minutes.
4. 
Reduce speed to low and slowly stir in chocolate mixture until combined, use a rubber spatula to scoop out all chocolate. Spoon into ramekins and place on baking sheet. Bake until edges are set but center is underdone, about 12 minutes, but check after 10. Avoid over-baking so the middle is still lava-like and runny. Let cool 3 minutes and serve.

Flourless Chocolate Lava Cake

Flourless Chocolate Lava Cake with Vegan Butter

This super easy 4 ingredient lava cake is a gourmet family favorite, that you can whip up in 30 minutes or less! It works well with vegan butter and coconut sugar, but regular butter and sugar can be substituted 1-1. Serves 5.
Prep Time 15 minutes
Cook Time 12 minutes

Ingredients
  

  • 8 ounces bittersweet chocolate chips
  • 12 tablespoons one stick and 1/2 vegan butter
  • 4 large organic eggs or 5 medium
  • 1/2 cup granulated coconut sugar
  • 1/8 teaspoon/pinch salt omit if using salted butter

Instructions
 

  • Preheat oven to 375°F. Vegan butter coat/ spray to oil five small ramekins.

 If you don't have ramekins, you can use a muffin tin.
  • Melt chocolate with vegan butter, stirring occasionally, until melted and smooth. Remove from heat.
  • While chocolate is melting, whip eggs, coconut sugar, and salt on medium-high speed until mixture is fluffy, about 5 minutes.
  • Reduce speed to low and slowly stir in chocolate mixture until combined, use a rubber spatula to scoop out all chocolate. Spoon into ramekins and place on baking sheet. Bake until edges are set but center is underdone, about 12 minutes, but check after 10. Avoid over-baking so the middle is still lava-like and runny. Let cool 3 minutes and serve.

Vegetarian Gnocchi with Spinach and Parmesan

A colorful and comforting vegetarian main dish! I try to use all organic/ non-gmo ingredients whenever possible. One of our family’s all time favorites.

Ingredients:

2 (17-ounce) packages potato gnocchi
3 cups heavy cream
1 cup vegetable broth
1/4 cup all-purpose flour
1/2 teaspoon salt
1/2 stick of butter
1/4 teaspoon freshly grated nutmeg
1 teaspoon freshly ground black pepper
12 ounces fresh baby spinach (frozen, defrosted can be used too)
3 ounces fresh goat cheese (chevre not feta)
1/2 cup freshly grated Parmesan cheese

Directions:

Preheat the oven to 400°F.
Place the gnocchi in a lightly greased 9 x 13 x 2-inch baking dish. Set aside.
In a medium saucepan, whisk together the cream, vegetable broth, butter and flour over medium heat.
Continue whisking until the sauce is simmering and thickened, about 5 minutes.
Add the salt, pepper, and nutmeg and stir to combine.
Add the spinach and toss to coat into cream.
Melt the goat cheese into the cream and spinach.
Pour the cream and spinach mixture evenly over the gnocchi and gently spread to cover.
Sprinkle with the Parmesan cheese.
Bake until the top is golden, about 25 minutes, you can broil for 3 minutes as well to complete!

Serve with a fresh garden salad and crusty bread.

3185542 s

Vegetarian Gnocchi with Spinach and Parmesan

A colorful and comforting vegetarian main dish! I try to use all organic/ non-gmo ingredients whenever possible. One of our family's all time favorites.

Ingredients
  

  • 2 17-ounce packages potato gnocchi
  • 3 cups heavy cream
  • 1 cup vegetable broth
  • 1/4 cup all-purpose flour
  • 1/2 teaspoon salt
  • 1/2 stick of butter
  • 1/4 teaspoon freshly grated nutmeg
  • 1 teaspoon freshly ground black pepper
  • 12 ounces fresh baby spinach frozen, defrosted can be used too
  • 3 ounces fresh goat cheese chevre not feta
  • 1/2 cup freshly grated Parmesan cheese

Instructions
 

  • Preheat the oven to 400°F.
  • Place the gnocchi in a lightly greased 9 x 13 x 2-inch baking dish. Set aside.
  • In a medium saucepan, whisk together the cream, vegetable broth, butter and flour over medium heat.
  • Continue whisking until the sauce is simmering and thickened, about 5 minutes.
  • Add the salt, pepper, and nutmeg and stir to combine.
  • Add the spinach and toss to coat into cream.
  • Melt the goat cheese into the cream and spinach.
  • Pour the cream and spinach mixture evenly over the gnocchi and gently spread to cover.
  • Sprinkle with the Parmesan cheese.
  • Bake until the top is golden, about 25 minutes, you can broil for 3 minutes as well to complete!

Notes

Serve with a fresh garden salad and crusty bread.

A few years ago, I discovered an amazing relationship technique called Imago, a transformative compassion technique developed by Dr. Harville Hendrix and Dr. Helen LaKelly Hunt. I offer a summary of this technique as part of our relationship repair program. It is exceedingly powerful and can help people that have given up on friendships, relationships or marriages to turn them around completely; it helped me personally and still does to this day.

Even the best of us can always refine our relationship skills. We all can get into negative patterns or have moments of emotional immaturity from childhood, that we can regress back into, when triggered. This meme is a summary of some of the warning signs of when we’ve embarked upon the relationship with a toxic person or brought in toxic patterns, and in contrast, what it looks like if we learned healthy patterns. For me, the journey of self awareness and the unceasing opportunity better my relationship with myself, my friends and my family is the essence of the real spiritual path.

 

listening heart

Overcoming dysfunctional relationship patterns

Healthy Patterns from John Welwood’s- Journey of the Heart
Learning to love well is an ongoing art of maturing and real evolution

Toxic Patterns:

hypocritical
can’t take criticism
never admits to being wrong
plays mind games
extremely manipulative
self serving and selfish
tendency to lie
loves drama
can’t be trusted
expects blind loyalty, but is not loyal
twists everything you say
will not take no for an answer
lacks healthy boundaries
is punitive
stonewalls or silent treatment
is a bully
is entitled
envious or jealous
neglectful
manipulative

Healthy Patterns:

consistent
welcomes constructive criticism
can admit to being wrong
is clear and fair
thinks of the other
is empathetic
is honest
calms and deescalates
can be trusted
is loyal
actively listens
respects limits
has healthy boundaries
is forgiving
open communication
is humble
has problem solving skills
wants both parties to thrive
capable of sincere care
self aware and skillful

Left content credit to: A Toxic Person
@understandingthenarc/Maria Consiglio

Image from pexels


Easy Homemade Naturally Sweetened Granola

This easy to make healthy granola recipe is naturally, lightly sweetened with coconut sugar or granulated monkfruit. It’s made with oats, coconut oil or vegan butter and you can add your choice of nuts and fruit. This one is a Chai-Almond but you can add almost anything. Go wild~ try chopped macadamia nuts, decadent dried cherries etc. Make a new flavor every week and get creative!

Ingredients

  • 6 cups old-fashioned uncut whole grain rolled oats
  • ½ cup of raw almonds
  • ½ cup of chopped hazelnuts
  • ½ cup (one stick) of melted butter, vegan butter, coconut oil or olive oil
  • 1 teaspoon salt if not using salted butter
  • 1 teaspoon of vanilla (optional)
  • ½ teaspoon ground cinnamon
  • ½ teaspoon ground cardamon
  • ½ cup coconut sugar, monkfruit sugar maple syrup or honey
  • ⅔ cup of your choice of dried/ cut fruit like cranberries, coconut flakes, carob chips (all optional)

Instructions

  1. Preheat oven to 350 degrees.
  2. In a large mixing bowl, combine the oats, nuts and fruit, salt and cinnamon.
    Stir to blend.
  3. Pour in the melted butter/oil.
  4. Mix well, spread the granola onto cookie sheet evenly.
  5. Bake until lightly golden toasted about 20 minutes, stirring 1/2 way through.
  6. Let cool before serving and store in an air-tight container.

granola ingredients
home made granola

 

granola1

Easy Homemade Naturally Sweetened Granola

This easy to make healthy granola recipe is naturally sweetened with coconut sugar or granulated monkfruit. It’s made with oats, coconut oil or vegan butter and you can add your choice of nuts and fruit.

Ingredients
  

  • 6 cups old-fashioned uncut whole grain rolled oats
  • ½ cup of almonds
  • ½ cup of hazelnuts
  • ½ cup one stick of melted butter, vegan butter, coconut oil or olive oil
  • 1 teaspoon salt if not using salted butter
  • ½ teaspoon ground cinnamon
  • ½ teaspoon ground cardamon
  • ½ cup coconut sugar monkfruit sugar maple syrup or honey
  • cup of your choice of dried/ cut fruit like cranberries coconut flakes, carob chips (all optional)

Instructions
 

  • Preheat oven to 350 degrees.
  • In a large mixing bowl, combine the oats, nuts and fruit, salt and cinnamon. Stir to blend.
  • Pour in the melted butter/oil. Mix well, spread the granola onto cookie sheet evenly.
  • Bake until lightly golden toasted about 20 minutes, stirring 1/2 way through.
  • Let cool before serving and store in an air-tight container.

apple pastry

Easy, Healthy Apple Custard Puff Pastry, Ready in 1 hour!

Ingredients:

  • 1 ½ lb frozen puff pastry thawed (2 sheets)
  • 1/3 cup brown sugar/honey/ brown rice syrup
  • 1 T sugar or granulated monkfruit sugar
  • ½ tsp cinnamon
  • 3 large apples washed and unpeeled thinly sliced
  • 1/3 cup sliced almonds
  • 1 organic egg
  • ½ tsp powdered sugar for topping
  • 4T butter or vegan butter (1T melted to brush)
  • 1 packet of vanilla pudding and oat/soy/cows milk

apples warm

custard

apple tart

puff

Instructions:

  • Preheat oven 400° F.
  • Roll puff pastry out into a 10″ square and put on greased cookie sheet.
  • Add 1 T sugar, 1/3 cup brown sugar and cinnamon to the apple slices and heat until soft in a saucepan with 1/3 c. water and butter
  • Heat the pudding with 1/2 the milk from instructions and add one whole egg, whisk briskly
  • Spread the custard onto the lower puff pastry
  • Pile the apple filling in the center of the puff pastry leaving 1″ around the edge free.
  • Sprinkle almonds on top
  • Place the second pastry on top folding the pastry as needed and pinching together gatherings of pastry.
  • Melt 1T of butter. Brush it on the pastry, and use a knife to poke steam holes.
  • Bake 15-20 minutes, until the pastry is golden.
  • Sprinkle with 1/2 tsp powdered sugar.
  • Serve warm or cold.
  • Serves 4-6.

Optional:

Vegan ice cream on the side

Author:

dawn

Dawn Boiani-Sandberg Wellness Coach
apply pastry

Apple Custard Puff Pastry

Easy, Healthy Apple Custard Puff Pastry, Ready in 1 hour!

Ingredients
  

  • 1 ½ lb frozen butter puff pastry thawed 2 sheets
  • 1/3 cup brown sugar/honey/ brown rice syrup
  • 1 Tbsp sugar or granulated monkfruit sugar
  • ½ tsp cinnamon
  • 3 large apples washed and unpeeled thinly sliced
  • 1/3 cup sliced almonds
  • 1 organic egg
  • 1/2 tsp powdered sugar for topping
  • 4 T butter or vegan butter 1T melted
  • 1 packet of vanilla pudding and oat/soy/cows milk

Instructions
 

  • Preheat oven 400° F.
  • Roll puff pastry out into a 10" square and put on greased cookie sheet.
  • Add 1 Tbsp sugar, 1/3 cup brown sugar and cinnamon to the apple slices and heat until soft in a saucepan with 1/3 c. water and butter
  • Heat the pudding with 1/2 the milk from instructions and add one whole egg, whisk briskly
  • Spread the custard onto the lower puff pastry
  • Pile the apple filling in the center of the puff pastry leaving 1" around the edge free.
  • Sprinkle almonds on top
  • Place the second pastry on top folding the pastry as needed and pinching together gatherings of pastry.
  • Melt 1T of butter. Brush it on the pastry, and use a knife to poke steam holes.
  • Bake 15-20 minutes, until the pastry is golden.
  • Sprinkle with 1/2 tsp powdered sugar.
  • Serve warm or cold.
  • Serves 4-6.

Notes

Vegan ice cream on the side

 

Low Carb, High Protein Healthy Chocolate Raspberry Muffins/ Scones

These are high protein low carb and highly nutritive, so we can feel good about offering these to our family. I’ve been experimenting with keto and paleo baking and found that I like to add organic white flour for 1/3 of the recipe. I know it’s considered a sin in the keto community but when we use exclusively almond or paleo flour (rice and almond), baked recipes come out very dense and hard (feedback… from the family.) A little bit of the organic white flour adds a lightness to our baking that is important. This recipe follows the keto/paleo rules by about two thirds, that much better for you than normal ordinary muffins/scones! If you really can’t stand using the half a cup of organic white flour you can substitute it with soy flour or coconut flour. These are a lightly sweet, densely filling chocolate muffins, great to pack on a hike or picnic!

Ingredients:

1 1/2 cups of paleo or almond flour
1/2 cup organic white flour
1/4 cup cold coconut oil – or any cold vegan butter
1/4 cup granulated monkfruit sugar, maple syrup or honey
2 Tbs water or vegan milk
2 organic eggs
2 tsp baking powder
1/2 cup dry cocoa powder
1/2 c melted dark chocolate
1 pinch of salt
1 12oz pack of sliced raspberries

Instructions:

1. Preheat oven to 375*
2. In a large mixing bowl combine dry ingredients
3. In another bowl combine eggs, melted chocolate water
4. Take cold butter or coconut oil and cut into flour with two knives
5. Now, briskly combine wet and dry ingredients, mixture should be slightly crumbly like a scone
6. Scoop into greased muffin tin, fill tin 3/4 way
7. Bake for 20-30 minutes or until slightly browned

chocolate scones

paleo chocolate raspberry muffins

Low Carb Chocolate Raspberry Muffins

These are high protein low carb and highly nutritive, so we can feel good about offering these to our family.

Ingredients
  

  • 1 1/2 cups of paleo or almond flour
  • 1/2 cup organic white flour
  • 1/4 cup cold coconut oil – or any cold vegan butter
  • 1/4 cup granulated monkfruit sugar maple syrup or honey
  • 2 Tbs water or vegan milk
  • 2 organic eggs
  • 2 tsp baking powder
  • 1/2 cup dry cocoa powder
  • 1/2 c melted dark chocolate
  • 1 pinch of salt
  • 1 12 oz pack of sliced raspberries

Instructions
 

  • Preheat oven to 375*
  • In a large mixing bowl combine dry ingredients
  • In another bowl combine eggs, melted chocolate water
  • Take cold butter or coconut oil and cut into flour with two knives
  • Now, briskly combine wet and dry ingredients, mixture should be slightly crumbly like a scone
  • Scoop into greased muffin tin, fill tin 3/4 way
  • Bake for 20-30 minutes or until slightly browned

Notes

These are high protein low carb and highly nutritive, so we can feel good about offering these to our family. I've been experimenting with keto and paleo baking and found that I like to add organic white flour for 1/3 of the recipe. I know it's considered a sin in the keto community but when we use exclusively almond or paleo flour (rice and almond), baked recipes come out very dense and hard (feedback... from the family.) A little bit of the organic white flour adds a lightness to our baking that is important. This recipe follows the keto/paleo rules by about two thirds, that much better for you than normal ordinary muffins/scones! If you really can't stand using the half a cup of organic white flour you can substitute it with soy flour or coconut flour. These are a lightly sweet, densely filling chocolate muffins, great to pack on a hike or picnic!

Photo by Anete Lusina from Pexels

golden milk

turmeric golden tea

What is Golden Moon Milk Calming Tea?

Feeling a bit overwhelmed? When I start to feel a bit anxious, I immediately take that as a sign to take it easy and go into self care. One of the very first things I do, is make Golden Milk, it’s essentially Turmeric and Ashwagandha powder tea. Golden Moon Milk is an ancient Indian ayurvedic remedy of a Warm Milk Drink that you drink before bed (at moontime) to calm the nerves, and helps to settle internal inflammation.

Ashwagandha:Ashwagandha is one of the most powerful herbs in Ayurvedic healing. It is classified as a rasayana i.e. rejuvenation in Ayurveda and expected to promote physical and mental health, restore the body and increase longevity.”

Turmeric: A form of ginger that, according to The Mindfulness Dojo, has “remarkable anti-oxidant, anti-inflammatory properties and helping the body’s defense system against lethal diseases, turmeric has gained immense importance as a superfood.”

1-2 Servings

Ingredients:

1T. Ashwagandha Powder

1 tsp. Turmeric Powder

2 cups Milk –  I prefer extra creamy oat milk but you can use any milk: hemp, almond, cashew, or cow’s.

1/2 tsp. Cinnamon

1/2 tsp. Cardamom

1 tsp.- 1T. Sweetener – Honey, maple syrup, sugar, granulated monkfruit or stevia.

Directions:

 

Needed: Saucepan, whisk, cup.

  • Heat the milk in a saucepan on medium heat, watch to prevent foaming, do not heavy boil.
  • Add all the ingredients and whisk together.
  • Let the spices low simmer for a few minutes.
  • Transfer to cup and enjoy warm, before bed or anytime.

Enjoy this powerful, deeply nutritive, Golden Calming Milk.

 

golden milk

Golden Moon Milk Calming Tea

Golden Moon Milk is an ancient Indian ayurvedic Warm Milk Drink that you drink before bed (at moontime) to calm the nerves, and helps to settle internal inflammation.
Ashwagandha: "Ashwagandha is one of the most powerful herbs in Ayurvedic healing. It is classified as a rasayana i.e. rejuvenation in Ayurveda and expected to promote physical and mental health, restore the body and increase longevity.
Turmeric: A form of ginger that, according to The Mindfulness Dojo, has "remarkable anti-oxidant, anti-inflammatory properties and helping the body’s defense system against lethal diseases, turmeric has gained immense importance as a superfood."
1-2 Servings

Equipment

  • Needed: Saucepan, whisk, cup.

Ingredients
  

  • 1 T. Ashwagandha Powder
  • 1 tsp. Turmeric Powder
  • 2 cups Milk – I prefer extra creamy oat milk but you can use any milk: hemp, almond, cashew, or cow's.
  • 1/2 tsp. Cinnamon
  • 1/2 tsp. Cardamom
  • 1 tsp.- 1T. Sweetener – Honey maple syrup, sugar, granulated monkfruit or stevia.

Instructions
 

  • Heat the milk in a saucepan on medium heat, watch to prevent foaming, do not heavy boil.
  • Add all the ingredients and whisk together.
  • Let the spices low simmer for a few minutes.
  • Transfer to cup and enjoy warm, before bed or anytime.

Notes

Enjoy this powerful, deeply nutritive, Golden Calming Milk.

 

Image ID : 95032260
Media Type : Stock Photo
Copyright : Maksim Shebeko

 

Decadent and Healthy Vegetarian Loaded Nacho Casserole with Melted Cheddar

Yield
Makes 6 servings

Ingredients

◦ 1 and 1/2 bags  (15 oz) of organic tortilla chips
◦ 1 can of organic vegetarian re-fried beans
◦ 1/4 teaspoon ground cumin or taco seasoning
◦ 1/4 cup sliced black olives
◦ 3 tablespoons jalapeño slices fresh or canned
◦ 1/2 cup shredded cheddar
◦ 1 can (15 oz) of nacho cheese sauce or make your own
◦ 1/2 – 2/3  (8oz) package of vegetarian meat crumbles
◦ 2 organic roma tomatoes, chopped
◦ 1/2 cup chopped onion
◦ cooking oil
◦ salsa as a condiment (with optional hot sauce)
◦  guacamole as a condiment

organic chips

Preparation

Heat oven to 425°F.

Cut onions, tomatoes, jalapenos and black olives.

Shred cheese.

Use a glass casserole dish, spread 1/2 of chips evenly on sheet.

In a frying pan, saute 1/2 of the onions in oil and then add the veg. meat, re-fried beans and taco spice.

Spoon bean mixture, vegetables and both cheeses over chips, layer the remaining chips repeat again.

Bake until cheese melts, 5 to 6 minutes.

Serve nachos with salsa and guacamole, and if desired, hot sauce! Cheers!

 

veg nachos

Vegetarian Loaded Nacho Casserole with Melted Cheddar

Yield Makes 6 servings

Ingredients
  

  • ◦ 1 and 1/2 bags 15 oz of organic tortilla chips
  • ◦ 1 can of organic vegetarian re-fried beans
  • ◦ 1/4 teaspoon ground cumin or taco seasoning
  • ◦ 1/4 cup sliced black olives
  • ◦ 3 tablespoons jalapeño slices fresh or canned
  • ◦ 1/2 cup shredded cheddar
  • ◦ 1 can 15 oz of nacho cheese sauce or make your own
  • ◦ 1/2 - 2/3 8oz package of vegetarian meat crumbles
  • ◦ 2 organic roma tomatoes chopped
  • ◦ 1/2 cup chopped onion
  • ◦ cooking oil
  • ◦ salsa as a condiment with optional hot sauce
  • ◦ guacamole as a condiment

Instructions
 

  • Heat oven to 425°F.
  • Cut onions, tomatoes, jalapenos and black olives.
  • Shred cheese.
  • Use a glass casserole dish, spread 1/2 of chips evenly on sheet.
  • In a frying pan, saute 1/2 of the onions in oil and then add the veg. meat, re-fried beans and taco spice.
  • Spoon bean mixture, vegetables and both cheeses over chips, layer the remaining chips repeat again.
  • Bake until cheese melts, 5 to 6 minutes.
  • Serve nachos with salsa and guacamole, and if desired, hot sauce! Cheers!

 

The Tantric Consort: Awakening Through Relationship

In our semi-apocalyptic time, it seems like many of us are going very deeply into introspection now. Very profound reflection is occurring on a global scale and our very species is on the precipice of survival. I believe that sometimes things have to get very dark before we have the impetus to change, akin to the alcoholic’s need to hit bottom before there’s a sufficient wake-up call and his or her survival instinct is triggered. I really believe with everything within me that this is a healing crisis of our planet, our human relationship to the planet and how we live out of balance with so much greed, our needs, desire and using of the earth’s and human resources in an imbalanced way. But, in order to make this change we have to go deep into our self reflection, look at patterns of who we are, why we feel the need to be so predatory and desire to live way beyond our means and way beyond what’s allocated to us to live in a harmonious, sustainable way.

So what’s been happening is I feel, is that the living quality of Gaia, our Mother Earth has put us all in a timeout now we have to simplify and go inward and really look and reflect who we are, what we want to create and how we can collectively survive. It seems like a lot of us have been catapulted into a fast-track of spiritual development that we weren’t necessarily prepared for. One of the most powerful ways that we can learn and grow, heal some of the deepest, darkest karmic propensities is through relationship with each other.

This is why a lot of us have been experiencing very intense relationships with ourselves, family, friends and a lot have met what is traditionally known as our twin flame. The image of a flame is the power to burn impurities, transform and re-arise like a phoenix. Meeting this person is rare, and they are supposed to be the mirror of a similar energetic signature. The meeting can be a nuclear, cataclysmic, transformative process. What happens when you look in a mirror? You see your own reflection as it is, without alteration, as the adage goes “the mirror doesn’t lie.”

Generally what happens immediately, is that one person runs away and the other person chases the other, like two flickering flames. However through this painful process of longing and heartbreak and misalignment, we begin to realize that both the running and the chasing are both forms of running away from the feeling our own union. Through the claustrophobia of the process and abject, inconsolable pain, we actually begin to see our own inner strength by reeling in the projection and grasping. My teacher told me that there’s nothing more painful than this dynamic between and man and a woman, and that could “drop kick” you into enlightenment. In the Indo-Tibetan Tantras a similar process of evolution occurs when meeting your spiritual consort. Other traditions refer to this as meeting the Beloved. A lot of us have a lot of adolescent, media infused notions of what it would be like to meet our twin flame or spiritual consort. There’s a lot of fantastic talk about union and bliss and Tantric sex and secret tantric sex practices called Karmamudra, but this real world process of growth has very little to do with that.

A Tutelary Relationship

When you meet the person that could best act as a tutelary relationship, that connection is exceedingly powerful and can help you to grow in ways that you never thought possible. Often times, if not every time, one meets this twin flame, a person’s life goes into crisis. Very, very deep dark karmic things immediately come to the surface in an almost uncanny way and causes conflict. Because of that, you attribute your own karmic baggage, blocks and pain to the relationship. This begins the infamous running away from each other process, as the two consider the relationship itself as being toxic. However in reality it’s the complete opposite of toxicity, it’s more akin to healing crisis, shedding light on what needs to be looked at so that we actually have the opportunity to heal.

However in reality it’s the complete opposite of toxicity, it’s more akin to healing crisis, shedding light on what needs to be looked at so that we actually have the opportunity to heal.

Patterns of feeling that we’re unworthy, unlovable, guilty, past issues from childhood wounding, all get stirred up and immediately rise to the surface when you meet what is considered to be a divine friend. You have a choice at that point, you can turn away from this process and try to go back to sleep which is somewhat impossible because the feeling of tapping at your shoulder and the invitation to go further into your own development becomes very loud, obsessive and almost impossible to turn away from. Or, you can recognize what’s happening you can see that indeed, the greatest gift one could encounter in life, is the spiritual consort. However, the encounter is not for the frail-hearted. If you read the history of our Tantric Buddhist Saints, the consort appears in our life and becomes a powerful method to help us open these very deep karmic blocks that we never even knew we had, and now they become accessible.

These three videos below talk about some of the basic conflict, shock and outright consternation that comes if you’ve met your twin flame. They explain the process and  how to handle the energy and survive the intensity of this powerful evolutionary process. A lot of it comes down to just simplifying, and feeling that we are really rooted in our own self-love, wholeness and well-being. It invites us to look at our codependency, grasping and how we use people as we try to make ourselves feel better and indeed social media doesn’t help, but rather exacerbates this serious type of addiction and codependency. The invitation is to begin to feel and reconnect to our own internal brightness and well-being. In tantra, this internal union, warmth free from grasping is called the Mahamudra or the Great Seal.

If you have the good fortune of having met your twin flame or your spiritual consort, you should celebrate because you’ve done sufficient work and are ready for real, core level evolution in this life. I have great faith in our species and the intelligence of the life force of this planet, and can trust the process that we will not allow ourselves to destroy ourselves and we will do this required internal work. Through this ascension into our human potential, we can help each other to live more simply, feel more real love and take care of each other and our planet and evolve into a sustainable and compassionate species that lives in harmony with each other. There will always be hardship; human beings will have moments of pride and greed and divisive things like nationalism, but that I think the fundamental harshness and what is broken this within us must heal in our species in order to survive. The personal affects the collective, so the efficacy of this work can’t be underestimated. Relationship is the most powerful, transformative gateway toward genuine healing and collective social evolution. If we have the fortune of taking time to process grief and really heal our broken spirit, the culmination is that we once again, feel warm and whole, our birthright. This can indeed, even change society. My teacher Tsoknyi Rinpoche once said:

“One person can harm the whole world, one person can help it.”

How magical of a new world we could create, from there~

 

 


Image from Pixabay
Lighted Match With Smoke on Black Background
Uploaded at March 03, 2016 and Closeup Photography of Pink Rose Flower

Keto Chocolate Walnut Brownies
How to make easy low carb keto brownies with paleo or almond flour.

Prep Time 15 minutes
Cook time 20 minutes
Total Time 1 hour
Yield 8 – 10 brownies

Ingredients:

• 1 cup paleo or almond flour
• 1/4 cup cocoa powder or 80 grams of unsweetened chocolate
• 2 tbsp raw cocoa nibs (optional)
• 1 tsp baking powder
• 1/3 tsp salt
• 1/3 cup melted coconut oil or butter
• 3 tbsp water
• 2 organic eggs, or 2 flax eggs, (mix 1tsp ground flax meal, 3tsp water per “egg”)
• 2/3 cup granulated erythritol or monk fruit sugar or honey
• 1 tsp pure vanilla or almond extract
• 2/3 cup of roughly chopped walnuts (optional)

Instructions:

Preheat the oven to 350 F. Grease an 8-inch pan. Melt the chocolate and coconut oil and honey if used on low heat. Mix all dry ingredients well, then gently combine the wet and dry. Spread evenly into your greased pan. Smooth down and even out with a rubber spatula. Bake for 20 minutes on the center rack, then let cool completely for 15 minutes to firm up before cutting. Brownies will firm up even more if you refrigerate them overnight. Brownies are great with or without frosting, and a perfect compliment with vegan ice cream!

 

pexels dima valkov 3734025

Keto Chocolate Walnut Brownies

How to make easy low carb keto brownies with paleo or almond flour.

Ingredients
  

  • 1 cup paleo or almond flour
  • 1/4 cup cocoa powder or 80g of unsweetened chocolate
  • 2 tbsp raw cocoa nibs optional
  • 1 tsp baking powder
  • 1/3 tsp salt
  • 1/3 cup melted coconut oil or butter
  • 3 tbsp water
  • 2 organic eggs or 2 flax eggs, (mix 1tsp ground flax meal, 3tsp water per “egg”)
  • 2/3 cup granulated erythritol or monk fruit sugar or honey
  • 1 tsp pure vanilla or almond extract
  • 2/3 cup of roughly chopped walnuts optional

Instructions
 

  • Preheat the oven to 350 F. Grease an 8-inch pan. Melt the chocolate and coconut oil and honey if used on low heat. Mix all dry ingredients well, then gently combine the wet and dry. Spread evenly into your greased pan. Smooth down and even out with a rubber spatula. Bake for 20 minutes on the center rack, then let cool completely for 15 minutes to firm up before cutting. Brownies will firm up even more if you refrigerate them overnight. Brownies are great with or without frosting, and a perfect compliment with vegan ice cream!

Notes

Prep Time 15 minutes
Cook time 20 minutes
Total Time 1 hour
Yield 8 – 10 brownies
Photo by Dima Valkov from Pexels
“My religion is to live and die without remorse”
– Milarepa –
“Mi religión es vivir y morir sin remordimientos”

Yes, the final breath, to die at peace with your life with no regrets. We are the choices we make, and we will leave an imprint of who we were and what we did, into the next generations when we pass. Think of the film “It’s a Wonderful Life,”  so many lives were touched by one, that is the closest to real “reincarnation” that we can prove to have, our karmic legacy.  People remember us for our warmth, conduct, love or… harm. To live a life without regret, requires that now when we are alive, to sit back and reflect, and think about what’s most meaningful to us. Meaning must come from within, not from what our society, family or even our religion or what those in religious authority, tells us is our value. I’ve worked with a lot of seniors and heard when people are dying, the most important thing to them at the end of life are the people that they loved, the quality of their relationships, and regret for people they hurt and didn’t resolve conflict with. You’d think it would be about their faith, the promise of some afterlife, God, heaven, angels, Buddhas or the next life, but people’s minds are really focused on love and relationship. For most at the end, it’s all about the depth of our awakened heart and love.

One of my teachers Chokyi Nyima said “if you can fix it with someone you must, you will feel better and they will feel better.” This is in our traditional 37 Practices of a Buddhist Bodhisattava as well, the practices of compassion, forgiveness and non-harming. Sometimes we don’t want to have contact with someone anymore if we think that they’ve hurt or betrayed us. Sometimes it’s hard to face how we treated others and we’d just rather forget and ignore our mistakes. The problem is, is that these moments of pain and conflict stay in our mindstreams and hearts we don’t really forget, even by silencing another or being in no contact. People just polarize, hold resentment, and each one blames the other. These are the seeds of human warfare, even hatred, so we must do better. We really don’t always have skills for conflict resolution, problem-solving, dealing with pain and misunderstandings and finding way to learn from each other to have resolve. Many of us just let relationships with family, friends or associates go by the wayside and hold a life of eternal resentment rather than venturing into the bravery of really healing.

The 12 Nidanas- Actively Cutting Karma

In our Buddhist Tradition, we often refer to a teaching called the 12 Nidanas. It’s a complex deconstructed system that literally means the chains or links of interdependent origination, that result in us creating a karmic circle. Imagine Jacob Marley’s hard forged chain in the afterlife. Basically in layman’s terms it’s a map of how people re-create patterns of suffering and how we stay in these patterns. We find it really difficult to cut the momentum and redirect ourselves into a more open, karma free way of relating to our lives. If we meditate and become more mindful, we can catch ourselves before we get upset, react or create a moment of karma. It’s particularly destructive to have negative karma and hurt the hearts of others and cause damage to ourselves or to our world. In order to remedy this process, we have to take a rigorous and honest look at ourselves and train ourselves to not act on impulse, to take a deep breath before we do something that we might regret. Of course everyone makes mistakes, conflicts arise, feelings get hurt, misunderstandings are part of what it is to be in existence with people with different views and emotional propensities. So the compilation of these deeds that we’ve done, out of passion, aggression or ignorance become the building blocks of us being unenlightened and hurting others. If we reflect through our lives we can see that maybe we burned a bridge or two, estranged a friend or family member and done and myriad of things that we really regret. This is a similar process to the fifth step in Alcoholics Anonymous, you admit to yourself and to another, anyone that you harmed and you make amends to them wherever possible.

A lot of the times we think too much time has gone by and it’s better to not bring up an old wound but in this system, if the person is still alive, we should make every effort to clear and heal any and all of our negative karma. I wanted to tell you a story about clearing karma from two personal relationships that I’ve had that are going pretty well. The first is an exceedingly difficult relationship I have with my mother. It’s always been a struggle between us for various personal reasons, but I’ve never given up on her no matter what has transpired.  Many people had dissuaded me from having her in my life, but I know her traumatic past and when you love someone, you understand and forgive. We have moments of great pain, difficulty and conflict. Even if I believe that I was in the right and she was in the wrong, I often will put my pride aside, reach out to her and tell her that I always care about her and I want to learn and move forward. Her personality type is not one that’s great for self reflection and apology so I have to create a workaround in order to have relationship with her. We have learned to take a deep breath when triggered, set boundaries if things get heated, redirecting and quelling any type of negativity before it escalates. My mother has cancer that it is currently in remission so I would regret if I allowed the conflict to put a wedge between us such that I never get to see her or tell her that I love her for this entire life. Even though the relationship has been difficult ever since I was born, I don’t want to sever the ties with a primary relationship and me continuing to reach out and forgive and yet, still set boundaries has worked really well.

I have another situation with a Dharma friend who I’ve known for 30 years. We’ve gotten into a number of conflicts about various issues over the years and at times we were not speaking to each other because of that. Most recently, I felt really brave and decided to discuss with him exactly the root of why we have this conflict and in the simple way, touched a few of the key issues. I did not blame or confront him perse, I used the traditional I messages” and spoke from the heart in a very clear and not particularly emotionally heated way. Like my mother, I told him that I cared about him and that we had decades of a long and close friendship and I really valued him always. I’m happy (even joyous) to report that in both of these instances with a high conflict propensity and emotionality, these powerful steps of clearing up hurt and negative karma have been successful! I think we all feel so much better when we have harmonious relationships and if we make mistakes we correct them as soon as we see what we’ve done. In this way I think our lives can be meaningful and we can understand how to love ourselves and others in a real and genuine way and with hope, even have this life be of benefit to others. The Buddhist analogy says that people are fundamentally good, like the sun always shining behind the clouds. The clouds (our flaws and mistakes) are temporary and do not define us.

5 Powerful Steps to Clear Negative Karma

  1. Honestly reflect on anyone you have harmed with body, speech or mind.
  2. Make a list of those names of friends or family from your past who you have hurt. Be honest about what your part was in the difficulty.
  3. Offer An Olive Branch. If they are still alive even if 1, 2 or 20 years have gone by, contact them in a gentle and noninvasive way. Reach out to them and communicate by phone or email and just tell them that you regret what happened and you wish them well, or if it’s a family member, be brave and tell them that you love them. If they have passed, forgive yourself and them mentally.
  4. Communicate Using “I” Messages without Blame. This process is not to be a rescuer, codependent or doormat toward people who’ve been abusive to you. If you try to make excuses for someone who has been abusive, then you’ve enabled that karmic seed to be re-created in them and that’s not helpful. If you need to explain why you got angry or hurt or what you think caused a disconnect, explain it without blaming, just use “I Messages” and tell the person in an honest and authentic way what you felt and what you think you both might be able to do differently next time.
  5. We are hardwired to want to forgive each other. We also want to learn and grow in this life. We are all imperfect and make mistakes and hurt each other, but we can also grow, grow up and heal even when very difficult things arose.

Live and End Without Regret

If you’ve hurt or been hurt by someone that you care about, we can correct it today, reach out to someone who you held grudges for- release and heal all karma you can. And for our family and friends, tell them and show them that you really love them, listen to them and be there for them, if it is safe. For me, clearing karma whenever possible has made all the difference in the world.  Sometimes, people will not forgive you or do not value you enough to have healthy “relational resolution”, we can only do our best. If we take these steps, I think our life will be profound and meaningful. It’s not about hours and years of renunciation and arduous meditation practice, value for me, is about becoming a really kind, present, authentic and loving person. Sometimes you also, just have to let others go, with  compassion. We must also bravely let go of people, places, communities and careers that we outgrow or no longer serve our highest good. We can then make space and time to create our very best life. If we clear our karma, heal conflicts, let go and love well, we will have no regret today, in our future, or our very last precious moment.

 

  *Jetsun Milarepa was a famous Tibetan Buddhist Saint that, with great tearful regret, attained enlightenment, even after he had caused the deaths of others. image:

Photo by Lola Russian from Pexels

 

How to completely heal from narcissistic abuse, loss of one’s faith and become a light in a darkening world.

 

I grew up in a rough culture on the east coast of the United States, in Newport, Rhode Island. I was raised by a teenage mother who didn’t really have any capacity to love me. My dad left when I was 3 and the environment before then was riddled with fighting, alcoholism and violence. She remarried right away but I think due to the trauma, she was always preoccupied with herself. She seemed always in fear, very controlling, involved with vanity, how she looked, how she appeared to the world and everything centered around her and her needs. She was emotionally somewhat histrionic and the whole family walked on eggshells in fear of her temper and her hostile reaction toward us. There was no room for me and in the home, I was considered a nuisance. I was then spanked by my stepfather weekly, criticized often and spent most of my time alone in my room. I cried untold tears. I was told I was ugly, devalued and ignored and oftentimes my mother said that she wish that she never had me.

I went to school always thinking that I was a misfit and there’s something deeply wrong with me and I really wasn’t worthy of love. So I started to read a lot of books and I studied really well and I always tried to make the teachers happy with me because that was the only sense of appreciation from anyone in authority that I had. I was really close with my teachers, got the perfect grades and one time my teacher even said to my mom that I was really bright, so much so that I should go to a special school for the gifted. The teacher was concerned because I was also really sensitive and I would get bullied and beaten up and teased a lot. This all now makes sense how I grew up because if I didn’t feel a sense of worth and confidence, small children could pick up on that weakness and I’ve always been targeted for my vulnerability.

Because of the teenage pregnancy and the pain my mother suffered and her fear, she was somewhat dissociated and unwell. I would try to spend time with her and she would send me away. I realized later that she had developed into becoming a full spectrum narcissist that was not capable of loving anyone other than thinking of herself. There was no way that we could ever resolve it as mother and daughter, since part of the narcissistic mindset denies it’s own hostility and projects all negative qualities onto other people. Narcissists, as well as other personality disorders, often must have a target of their shadow and blame. For my entire life for her, I was the chosen one. Thanks Mom!

I was fortunate in my later years to discover a book called Healing the Daughters of Narcissistic Mothers, and sought counseling with the author Dr. Karyl McBride, a co-survivor. What I realized is that narcissism at it’s root, is the healthy longing for a person to take care of themselves, gone awry. What I realized is that, if we actually feel a sense of inner love and well-being, from there we can love others. The narcissists attempt to pay attention to something that’s broken inside is at it core, correct. Where it goes wrong is that the foundation of real healing and self-love is not there and in fact it’s often an emotional vacuum, devoid of compassion. From that vacuum, you begin to see others as something that you can use to fill up that hollowness and heal a core of fundamental self hatred.

Part of the fallout in this life was of course in my adulthood, to  recreate the pattern of feeling broken and bullied and looking for other friends, lovers and organizations to make everything right. This is the quintessential codependent  person that likewise feels broken and unwell and uses other people like a drug to put a giant Band-Aid on their loneliness. I would follow rock stars and then cult-like spiritual groups and none of this was super healthy because it was predicated on me feeling hollow, and unworthy looking for something, anything outside of myself to fill the void.

journaling

A NEW DAY… uncover bulletproof self love and genuine warmth for others

There’s a Buddhist slogan that says “be grateful to everyone.” I am not angry or bitter that anyone hurt me in this life, they probably had a harder time than I did, and maybe suffer even more. My spiritual community who I used to find solace and meaning in, recency dismantled in the wake of #metoo. I discovered later that guru worship had a lot of covert, exploitative narcissists, it figures that these communities felt somehow familiar. I found myself adrift, really, palpably alone. I decided to take a genuine honest look at my life, who I really am rawly and what matters to me. I feel like I gained my identity through this spiritual community and my friends there and without that, I felt devastated. I have my family but everything was starting to fall apart into an abyss and I wondered, what really has any meaning?

So from there, I decided to really go inward and not depend upon anything or anyone to make me feel better. I began to shutdown social media for longer lengths of time as to not depend upon people liking my posts to faux-foster self-esteem. I took some time to go into solitary retreat as much as I could. I was away from my husband and daughter and taking silence from some friends. I began to journal, meditate and begin the most rigorous process of self inquiry I could muster.

Then, something dawned upon me, a basic truism that I guess everyone else at figured out, but it’s taken me 50 years to realize…

I can’t love another person in a healthy way unless I have strong core of real self-love and self well-being to rely on.

This was my Aha! moment. I asked myself- how to have this life feel meaningful, how to love others and with hope, be of benefit? I can’t be codependent and broken and needing other people or religion or paltry social media to define who I am and make me feel better. I knew that was never going to work, so I decided- let’s start at square one, go into radical self-care and have a love affair with… myself… saucy. It’s a perfect time because all of us are on somewhat of a social timeout with the pandemic so it’s a great time to go inward.

A NEW RETREAT INTO JOY

I decided to get up in the morning and do some stretching or some cardio, enjoy sipping dark coffee and take warm essential oil baths. During my retreats over the years I use to meditate 8 to 10 hours a day and do a lot of chanting and complex visualizations. This time, I decided to just take time for me without any schedule or agenda, and just let life talk to me about what is fun and reconnect the sense of magic and wonder that maybe I’ve never even had in childhood. I decided to take a week or so and have absolutely no schedule (and I do feel grateful for the privilege to be able to take this time). I did whatever I wanted to do, if I wanted to journal on my blog, I would write, if I wanted to go for a walk I’d go for a walk, if I want to bake something special for myself I would. If I wanted to cry, I’d cry, whatever was there was listened to and honored, nothing repressed. It’s actually kind of outrageous to take even a day, a weekend, a week or a month to just feel alive, go outside and feel grass under your feet, feel sun on your cheeks, lay on a hammock and see a cloudless sky, and just feel like this life is yours, rather than always having to do something for work or for someone else.

This is where a little tiny light inside my heart started to shine and turn on. I could see it in my eyes when I looked at myself in the mirror, I began to feel the sense of self-love and self appreciation and gratitude for this life. I don’t think I really had this before, it’s taken more than half of my life to finally feel this, and it required that I let go of my tradition, every spiritual, ego prop and support.

 

self care

 

I begin to see how real love and real well-being works since it’s never been modeled to me before. If we have this inner spark of warmth, the power and efficacy of that can’t be underestimated. The cultivation of inner warmth can give us so much strength to be able to handle these darkening times. If we can take refuge in our own inner love and well-being in real way, we can’t be narcissistic or codependent, these facets of the same brokenness dissolve. In Buddhism, we call this maitri and and it’s considered a wish fulfilling jewel or diamond. Inner warmth is like a diamond because if you think about it for a minute, if someone criticizes you it may hurt but it doesn’t stick because you know yourself and are grounded in your own well-being. Likewise, if someone complements you or likes your social media, it doesn’t get used as ego’s fodder. We consider this process of compliment and criticism to be one of the worldly dharmas. Things are always arising in duality, both positive and negative, we have both floods and rainbows, love and loss, everything is always changing. Behind that, there’s an inner mountain of real strength that we can access, that we can have our own backs, even up unto our last breath. Through taking time for this deep self care, a love affair firstly with ourselves, we can finally uncover this real, bulletproof inner warmth and joy. You’ve heard the cliche, “you can’t love anyone if you can’t love yourself.” If the relationship with ourselves is caring with positive self talk, we can then create healthy interactions with others, with qualities of real compassion, listening, patience and problem solving.

“Tune in, turn on” and shine your light into these dark times my dear friends, it can help to change our very world. ☀️

________________________________

 

Photo by Joshua Abner from Pexels

“Drive All Blames Into Oneself”

Humans, throughout time immemorial have been capable of committing the most cruelest crimes imaginable, some intentional, some based on self defense, emotional reaction or ignorance. However, there is always hope for regret and personal change if we really desire to do so. We cannot have contrition and heal negative karmic patterns, as long as we constantly blame others for our wrong views, misconduct and wrongdoings. Oftentimes, those who we blame and perceive as “evil” and “enemies” are just mirrors of our own unseen bad behavior and karmic traces. I’ve done some work in the prisons, and with war veterans with complex PTSD, who have a hard time recovering from the pain and trauma of what’s called “moral injury,” from the actions and experiences during wartime. However, there’s a tried and true method of healing from even the most egregious negative patterns and past, even that of unforgivable war crimes.

We had a famous Buddhist Saint named Milarepa, who in his past, had reportedly practiced black magic and out of vindication, caused the death of many people. He later, sincerely regretted his dark past, turned over a new leaf and used the rest of his life to be a tremendous benefit to others to ultimately attain full enlightenment. In order to begin this process of getting on the right track and healing, we have to be honest with ourselves about who we are, what we’ve done and like in any 12 Step program, take the first step and admit with all humility, that we have committed wrongdoing. We no longer justify our bad behavior nor blame others. The Dharma offers the powerful Four Powers as a remedy for unwholesome actions, to forgive oneself, make deep personal change and ultimately be free of guilt, blame and shame:

 

THE FOUR POWERS

1. The power of REGRET – of a negative activity or pattern.

2. The power of REFUGE – re-establishing of the right attitude of non-harming, compassion and benefit.

3. The power of RESOLUTION – decision never to repeat the negative action again.

4. The power of REMEDY – applying the antidotes, purifying action, making amends to any who you have harmed.

 

*Lojong Training Slogan
https://www.lamayeshe.com/article/purifying-four-powers

If we’ve even committed any of the heinous crimes which are considered truly unforgivable~ like killing an enlightened being or causing the downfall of the Dharma, there are purification methods which involve powerful transformative rituals. With the Mindfulness Peace Project they work with war veterans that have a hard time forgiving themselves and integrating back into normal society after having been involved with unforgivable actions. What is done, is you take the root of the person’s faith if they have any, and create some type of ritual process of contrition, forgiveness and absolution. One might imagine God or Jesus or all the Buddhas or the Sun, in front of you and you and “confess.” You speak out exactly what you’ve done wrong, and then you imagine that whomever or whatever you have faith in, even if it’s just our “higher self,” completely forgives you and with great sincere regret, you vow to never do those actions again. It turns out that these rituals can be very powerful in liberating the negative guilt and unhealed karmic seeds that we hold within us that wind up re-creating patterns of depression, self-doubt and social harm.

None of us, no action is irredeemable; each of us have within us a human conscience, however dormant. I think we all have an innate longing to live our best life possible, even people with damage, trauma and personality disorders. Through causes and conditions, wrong views and unresolved wounding from our past, we can commit heinous deeds. In contrast, we can also turn our lives around and completely heal if we have the foundation of the willingness to be honest and make the deep personal changes required to really learn and grow. This premise of radical compassion even in the face of war veterans, or hardened criminals, is the root of all possible prison reform and restorative justice that our society is sorely lacking.

This amazing organization called The Compassion Prison Project, understands that at the root within all human hearts, is goodness that cannot forever be covered. Their premise is that each of us could take a wrong turn in life and the people that commit crimes are usually responding to early child abuse and neglect and unresolved trauma, and should be treated with exceeding understanding and therapeutic compassion, rather than reifying the notion that they are criminals and should be punished. I foresee an entire new day dawning with our understanding of human nature, the importance of self forgiveness and healing on personal level and how this can become the building blocks of healing society as a whole.

Step Inside the Circle from Fritzi Horstman on Vimeo.

 

cauliflower wings

Buffalo Cauliflower Hot Wings

I think this is hands down, our family’s all time favorite vegetarian dinner. You can use butter and blue cheese dressing or substitute vegan options for these two. We make these for watching sports or for special occasions and it’s amazing how flavorful the cauliflower is with the hot red chili pepper sauce. It’s very decadent as everything’s baked in butter but not deep-fried. I make some healthier sliced french fried potatoes, wedged with the skin on, and some organic carrots and celery to dip in the blue cheese.

Ingredients:

2 heads of organic cauliflower approx. 6 cups of florets
1/2 cup milk for vegan: use water or alt unsweetened milk
2 organic eggs
1/2 cup breadcrumbs can sub gluten-free rice crumbs
1/2 cup cornmeal
1 tsp salt
1/4 tsp ground pepper
1/2 cup red hot pepper sauce like Tabasco or Cholula
1 1/2 sticks butter- can sub. vegan butter or olive oil
1 cup cut organic carrot sticks
1 cup cut organic celery sticks
1/2 cup chunky blue cheese dressing or vegan blue cheese
3T ketchup
5 medium organic baking potatoes washed and scrubbed with skin on.

Needed: 2 cookie sheets, 2 large mixing bowls, whisk, aluminum foil

cauliflower wings

Instructions

Line two baking sheets with aluminum foil or grease very well with oil.
Preheat your oven to 425 F.
Slice potatoes thin and lengthwise.
Please on a single layer on cookie sheet and pour 1/4 c butter sprinkle salt on them.
Put them into oven to cook while you prepare the cauliflower, potatoes need an extra 10 minutes.
Wash and cut cauliflower head into bite-sized pieces/florets.
Whisk  the milk and eggs together in a large bowl.
Mix the breadcrumbs and cornmeal and 1/2t of salt in a large mixing bowl.
Coat the cauliflower in the egg mixture then coat with breadcrumb mixture.
Shake off excess batter before placing cauliflower on the baking sheet.
Lay the cauliflower single layer on the baking sheet.
Bake for 20 minutes until golden brown, turning them over so that all sides golden brown and crispy.
While the cauliflower is baking, prepare buffalo wing sauce.
Melt 1/2 cup of butter.
Take ‘wings’ out and pour butter and hotsauce on wings, coat well. Salt and Pepper to taste.
Bake in the oven for another 10-15 minutes.
Take out fries and salt, serve with ketchup.
Serve wings with cut carrots, celery and blue cheese. Cheers!

califlower wings1

Buffalo Cauliflower Hot Wings

I think this is hands down, our family's all time favorite vegetarian dinner. You can use butter and blue cheese dressing or substitute vegan options for these two. We make these for watching sports or for special occasions and it's amazing how flavorful the cauliflower is with the red chili pepper. It's very decadent as everything baked in butter but not deep-fried. I make some healthier sliced french fried potatoes, wedged with the skin on, and some organic carrots and celery to dip in the blue cheese.

Equipment

  • 2 cookie sheets
  • 2 large mixing bows
  • aluminum foil

Ingredients
  

  • 2 heads of organic cauliflower approx. 6 cups of florets
  • 1/2 cup milk for vegan: use water or alt unsweetened milk
  • 2 organic eggs
  • 1/2 cup breadcrumbs can sub gluten-free rice crumbs
  • 1/2 cup cornmeal
  • 1 tsp salt
  • 1/4 tsp ground pepper
  • 1/2 cup red hot pepper sauce like Tabasco or Cholula
  • 1 1/2 sticks butter- can sub. vegan butter or olive oil
  • 1 cup cut organic carrot sticks
  • 1 cup cut organic celery sticks
  • 1/2 cup chunky blue cheese dressing or vegan blue cheese
  • 3 T ketchup
  • 5 medium organic baking potatoes washed and scrubbed with skin on

Instructions
 

  • Line two baking sheets with aluminum foil or grease very well with oil.
  • Preheat your oven to 425 F.
  • Slice potatoes thin and lengthwise.
  • Please on a single layer on cookie sheet and pour 1/4 c butter sprinkle salt on them.
  • Put them into oven to cook while you prepare the cauliflower, potatoes need an extra 10 minutes.
  • Wash and cut cauliflower head into bite-sized pieces/florets.
  • Whisk  the milk and eggs together in a large bowl.
  • Mix the breadcrumbs and cornmeal and 1/2t of salt in a large mixing bowl.
  • Coat the cauliflower in the egg mixture then coat with breadcrumb mixture.
  • Shake off excess batter before placing cauliflower on the baking sheet.
  • Lay the cauliflower single layer on the baking sheet.
  • Bake for 20 minutes until golden brown, turning them over so that all sides golden brown and crispy.
  • While the cauliflower is baking, prepare buffalo wing sauce ready.
  • Melt 1/2 cup of butter.
  • Take wings out and pour butter and hotsauce on wings, coat well. Salt and Pepper to taste.
  • Bake in the oven for another 10-15 minutes.
  • Take out fries and salt, serve with ketchup.
  • Serve wings with cut carrots, celery and blue cheese. Cheers!

 

Chai Spiced Paleo Scones with Berry Compote
A best friend visited one summer morning and I made her some super easy and healthy Chai Spiced Paleo Scones: wheatless, sugarless, flour-less, high protein, and densely nutritive. Now I’m making them again for the fall, when a warm oven is welcome. They are perfect topped with spreadable vegan butter and a warm berry compote!

Ingredients:

2 cups of Paleo or almond flour
3 T coconut flour – if using almond flour
3 T of flaxseed meal (optional)
1/4 cup coconut oil – or any vegan butter, reserve some for basting
1/4 cup granulated monkfruit sugar, maple syrup or honey, more for sprinkling and compote
3 Tbs water
2 organic eggs
2 tsp baking powder
1 tsp vanilla
1 T cinnamon
1 tsp cardamom
1/2 tsp clove powder
1 pinch of salt
1 12oz pack or 2cups of fresh or frozen berries

Instructions:

1. Preheat oven to 375*
2. In a large mixing bowl combine dry ingredients
3. In another bowl combine eggs, vanilla and water
4. Take cold butter or coconut oil and cut into flour with two knives
5. Now, briskly combine wet and dry ingredients, mixture should be slightly crumbly (if necessary you may need to add a few drops more of water if your mixture seems too dry)
6. Form into an 8″ x 2″ round circle and place on parchment paper
7. Cut into 8ths and separate with a spatula
8. Bake for 30 minutes or until slightly browned
9. While scones are cooking heat frozen or fresh berries in a saucepan and add 3T of sweetener
10. Brush scones with a bit of melted vegan butter, sprinkle with a little monkfruit sugar and top with berry compote, serve warm!

Tools Needed:

Cookie Sheet
Parchment Paper
Spoon and Spatula
1 Large and 1 Small Mixing Bowl
Basting Brush

berry scone

scone berry compote

Chai Spiced Paleo Scones with Berry Compote

A best friend visited one summer morning and I made her some super easy and healthy Chai Spiced Paleo Scones: wheatless, sugarless, flour-less, high protein, and densely nutritive. Now I'm making them again for the fall, when a warm oven is welcome. They are perfect topped with spreadable vegan butter and a warm berry compote!

Equipment

  • Tools Needed:
  • Cookie Sheet
  • Parchment Paper
  • Spoon and Spatula
  • 1 Large and 1 small mixing bowl
  • Basting Brush

Ingredients
  

  • 2 cups of Paleo or almond flour
  • 3 T coconut flour - if using almond flour
  • 3 T of flaxseed meal optional
  • 1/4 cup coconut oil - or any vegan butter reserve some for basting
  • 1/4 cup granulated monkfruit sugar maple syrup or honey, more for sprinkling and compote
  • 3 Tbs water
  • 2 organic eggs
  • 2 tsp baking powder
  • 1 tsp vanilla
  • 1 T cinnamon
  • 1 tsp cardamom
  • 1/2 tsp clove powder
  • 1 pinch of salt
  • 1 12 oz pack or 2 cups of fresh or frozen berries

Instructions
 

  • Preheat oven to 375*
  • In a large mixing bowl combine dry ingredients
  • In another bowl combine eggs, vanilla and water
  • Take cold butter or coconut oil and cut into flour with two knives
  • Now, briskly combine wet and dry ingredients, mixture should be slightly crumbly (if necessary you may need to add a few drops more of water if your mixture seems too dry)
  • Form into an 8" x 2" round circle and place on parchment paper
  • Cut into 8ths and separate with a spatula
  • Bake for 30 minutes or until slightly browned
  • While scones are cooking heat frozen or fresh berries in a saucepan and add 3T of sweetener
  • Brush scones with a bit of melted vegan butter, sprinkle with a little monkfruit sugar and top with berry compote, serve warm!

Food photo created by azerbaijan_stockers – www.freepik.com

This Comforting Spiced Kitchari Dal Bhat, is a modified version of the nutritive, cleansing Kitchari from the spiritual community of Shoshoni, and a shoutout to a lifetime yogi friend for his cooking instructions. Dal Bhat which means lentils and rice, is a staple the food served daily in Nepal and India. When you combine the rice and red lentils, you have a complex protein. Kitchari is often used in Ayurvedic medicine as a cleansing food as it’s very easy to digest and is nutritive. In the Ayurvedic tradition, kitchari is one of the foods that is considered sattvic. Sattvic is calming to your digestion and digestive track, and includes vegetables, oils or ghee (clarified butter), fruits, beans, and whole grains. In fact, I regularly follow the at home cleanse suggested by LifeSpa where you eat only this. You can make a big batch of it while you are doing the cleanse or on a solitary retreat doing self-care. It’s so spicy and comforting and inexpensive, the staff at Shoshoni always say that it’s their favorite thing for them to eat!

• 2 C dried yellow or red split peas (Moong Dal)
• 5 C water
• 2 T ghee, coconut or olive oil
• 1/2 tsp dried fennel seed
• 1 tsp chopped ginger root
• 1 T black mustard seeds
• 1 T cumin seeds
• 1 clove garlic, minced
• 1 tsp. turmeric
• 1 tsp. chili paste, or a pinch of cayenne pepper
• 1 tsp. ground cumin
• 1 tsp. ground coriander

(or sub the above 4 with Quality Curry Powder)

• 2 tomatoes, finely chopped
• 1/2 cup chopped onions
• 2 tsp. salt, or to taste
• 1T monkfruit or cane sugar
• 2 cups spinach
• 1/2 cup sliced carrots
Rice: Long Grain Organic Basmati Rice, Cooked on the side
Condiments: Plain Greek Yogurt, Mango Lime Pickle and Chutney on the side


Directions:

1. Rinse split peas. Bring water to boil in a large pot, and add peas. Return to boil, stir, then lower heat, and simmer 1 hour until tender.

2. In a skillet, heat oil and sauté, mustard seeds until they “pop” and turn grey. Add cumin seeds and fry until golden. Make sure to cover the pan when cooking seeds, or they’ll “pop” all over your kitchen! Add garlic,
ginger, onions, turmeric, chili paste or cayenne, ground cumin, and coriander (or curry powder).
Sauté, 2 minutes. Add tomatoes and sauté, until the tomato is mushy (about 3-5 minutes).

3. Add mixture to Dal, salt, and vegetables cook another 20 minutes, adding 1c water. Warm rice and condiments are served on the side.

 

kitchari dahl bhat

Comforting Spiced Kitchari Dal Bhat

This Comforting Spiced Kitchari Dal Bhat, is a modified version of the nutritive, cleansing Kitchari from the spiritual community of Shoshoni, and a shoutout to a lifetime yogi friend for his cooking instructions. Dal Bhat which means lentils and rice, is a staple the food served daily in Nepal and India. When you combine the rice and red lentils, you have a complex protein. Kitchari is often used in Ayurvedic medicine as a cleansing food as it's very easy to digest and is nutritive. In the Ayurvedic tradition, kitchari is one of the foods that is considered sattvic. Sattvic is calming to your digestion and digestive track, and includes vegetables, oils or ghee (clarified butter), fruits, beans, and whole grains. In fact, I regularly follow the at home cleanse suggested by LifeSpa where you eat only this. You can make a big batch of it while you are doing the cleanse or on a solitary retreat doing self-care. It's so spicy and comforting and inexpensive, the staff at Shoshoni always say that it's their favorite thing for them to eat!

Ingredients
  

  • 2 C dried yellow or red split peas Moong Dal
  • 5 C water
  • 2 T ghee, coconut or olive oil
  • 1/2 tsp dried fennel seed
  • 1 tsp chopped ginger root
  • 1 T black mustard seeds
  • 1 T cumin seeds
  • 1 clove garlic minced
  • 1 tsp. turmeric
  • 1 tsp. chili paste or a pinch of cayenne pepper
  • 1 tsp. ground cumin
  • 1 tsp. ground coriander
  • or sub the above 4 with Quality Curry Powder
  • 2 tomatoes finely chopped
  • 1/2 cup chopped onions
  • 2 tsp. salt or to taste
  • 1 T monkfruit or cane sugar
  • 2 cups spinach
  • 1/2 cup sliced carrots
  • Rice: Long Grain Organic Basmati Rice Cooked on the side
  • Condiments: Plain Greek Yogurt Mango Lime Pickle and Chutney on the side

Instructions
 

  • Rinse split peas. Bring water to boil in a large pot, and add peas. Return to boil, stir, then lower heat, and simmer 1 hour until tender.
  • In a skillet, heat oil and sauté, mustard seeds until they "pop" and turn grey. Add cumin seeds and fry until golden. Make sure to cover the pan when cooking seeds, or they'll "pop" all over your kitchen! Add garlic,
  • ginger, onions, turmeric, chili paste or cayenne, ground cumin, and coriander (or curry powder).
  • Sauté, 2 minutes. Add tomatoes and sauté, until the tomato is mushy (about 3-5 minutes).
  • Add mixture to Dal, salt, and cook with vegetables another 20 minutes, adding 1c water. Warm rice and condiments are served on the side.

photo: Emily Kate Roemer

Welcome the fall and harvest! A perfect easy, healthy cookie sheet dinner with colorful oven roasted root vegetables and baked tofu. Vegan, gluten-free and kosher.

Ingredients

• 1 lb tofu sliced lengthwise
• 1 large yam or sweet potato washed with skin on
• 3/4 pounds brussel sprouts cut in half
• 1/2 pound beets (red or golden), trimmed and scrubbed clean
• 1/2 pounds large carrots washed and sliced
• 1/2 red or white onion peeled (optional)
• 12 whole garlic cloves large sized
• 1/4 cup extra virgin olive oil
• 2 tablespoon fresh or dried rosemary
• 1 teaspoon salt
• 1/4 tsp cracked pepper or more to taste

Recipe Notes

Note: Some people prefer to peel their veggies. I buy organic veggies and scrub them well. When using red beets your other veggies may take on a bit of reddish color. You can use golden beets instead, or roast the red beets on one side of roasting pan.

Instructions

1. Preheat oven to 425 degrees F.
2. Slice all veggies into about 1-1/2 inches square. The more similar in size, the more evenly they’ll roast.
3. Put cut veggies into a cookie sheet or roasting pan. Spread the veggies out evenly on the baking sheet. Add 3 tablespoon olive oil, herbs, salt, and pepper. Stir until all veggies are evenly coated with oil, spice and herbs.
4. On a second cookie sheet, spread 2T olive oil, and place tofu slices.
5. 



Roast the veggies in the oven for fifteen minutes. Stir the veggies and turn over the tofu, return baking sheet to oven and continue to roast until the largest ones are tender and the borders are starting to turn golden/dark, another 15-25 minutes.

roasted root veggies scaled

Roasted Root Vegetables with Baked Tofu

Welcome the fall and harvest! A perfect easy, healthy cookie sheet dinner with colorful oven roasted root vegetables and baked tofu. Vegan, gluten-free and kosher.
Prep Time 1 hour

Equipment

  • 2 cookie sheets or shallow roasting pans

Ingredients
  

  • 1 lb tofu sliced lengthwise
  • 1 large yam or sweet potato washed with skin on
  • 3/4 pounds brussel sprouts cut in half
  • 1/2 pound beets red or golden, trimmed and scrubbed clean
  • 1/2 pounds large carrots washed and sliced
  • 1/2 red or white onion peeled optional
  • 12 whole garlic cloves large sized
  • 1/4 cup extra virgin olive oil
  • 2 tablespoon fresh or dried rosemary
  • 1 teaspoon salt
  • 1/4 tsp cracked pepper or more to taste

Instructions
 

  • Preheat oven to 425 degrees F.
  • Slice all veggies into about 1-1/2 inches square. The more similar in size, the more evenly they'll roast.
  • Put cut veggies into a cookie sheet or roasting pan. Spread the veggies out evenly on the baking sheet. Add 3 tablespoon olive oil, herbs, salt, and pepper. Stir until all veggies are evenly coated with oil, spice and herbs.
  • On a second cookie sheet, spread 2T olive oil, and please tofu slices.
  • Roast the veggies in the oven for fifteen minutes. Stir the veggies and turn over the tofu, return baking sheet to oven and continue to roast until the largest ones are tender and the borders are starting to turn golden/dark, another 15-25 minutes.

Notes

Note: Some people prefer to peel their veggies. I buy organic veggies and scrub them well. When using red beets your other veggies may take on a bit of reddish color. You can use golden beets instead, or roast the red beets on one side of roasting pan.

akashic

Questions About Our Future

I think every single person at some point in life is curious about their future and would love to have some clarity about what’s happening with them now. We often we stay stuck in not knowing what choices to make, how to proceed and what’s best for us. When we’re in college we might consult with a career counselor, at different stages of life we might ask friends for support, we might journal and try to go inward and find out what our truth is. Throughout human history people have relied upon oracles and divinations to try to access deeper wisdom and some insight about our future.

Now, I come from a tradition where we adhere to evidenced-based-science and I’m not easily wooed and enticed by new age magic, magical thinking, conspiracies, gods, angels or spirits or things that are not directly perceived by our five senses. However I have a degree in psychology with the focus on Buddhist studies and we studied things in college such as Gestalt Therapy and Carl Jung’s notion of the collective unconscious. Let’s take a minute out and look at what the collective unconscious would really mean. Think about that very word for a moment; it’s pretty intense when you break it down… COLLECTIVE unconscious. That means that all of us share some type of similar base operating system within our species, a collective. You could imagine an analogy to a computer or even a cyborg. There’s one central operating computer that is electronically connected to everyone else’s personal computers and the Internet of Things. This collective unconscious would be something that would be part of our birthright and what we were all privy to, when we came into our life as a facet of our species.

The Bee’s Know

I imagine the collective unconscious as something like this, imagine that a honeybee is born. That bee, just by taking birth already has hardwired into his mindstream a template of how to make a honeycomb, the acknowledgment of his role as a worker bee, the respect and reverence and relationship he would have to a queen bee. The worker bee will know that it has a task to go out and collect pollen and how to process that within the honeycomb and work together cooperatively to have an entire complex, productive social milieu. No parent taught that bee how to make a honeycomb what it’s role was, what the queen was how to make the architectural template of the geometry of honeycomb, it was hardwired into his knowing as a bee, part of his birthright. You could say that his mindstream was connected with his biological DNA as a bee and he inherited that whole entire complex understanding, just by being born.

How and Why Divinations Work

If a far more complex being comes into existence like a human being, and we have some natural, basic understanding of the bio-complexity of our social, organizational structure. That’s where you get the entire pantheon of the archetypes like the queen, the minister and all of the things that are talked about in star maps, astrology, Tarot, the Taoist I-Ching and a lot of ancient divinations. This body of collective wisdom that we are all privy to on a very subtle archetypal level, defines the collective unconscious. That collective unconscious holds with in it, this body of information that is not limited to only a one-dimensional linear time. It’s more of like a consensual conglomerate of intelligence that’s a natural facet of our universe. When we are in our waking consciousness, we are distracted with a lot of business and things that we have to do in our own individual lives. We turn away from our ability to access the complexity of this archetypal wisdom within us. When we do certain things like consult a valid oracle, or look at Tarot or read from the collective unconscious which is also part of what’s known as the akashic records, we begin to tap into a generally dormant but yet subtly existing part of ourselves.

This is why throughout human history, some people could be clear-seeing. What was it that they’re actually seeing? They see the collective unconscious or seeing the wisdom of the interconnectedness of all of these archetypes and how they influence our lives in human society. As far as I understand, the akashic records are part of the collective unconscious, they are series of personal stories and propensities of our own archetypal template. When you open up your akashic records and you read, if you’d like to call it reading, it’s actually just more of a matter of allowing,  you can begin to see how to live your life in a way that is meant for you and serves your highest good. This wisdom is our birthright and is always operating with in us, but oftentimes because of concepts, unprocessed grief, confusion or just stupor,  we turn away from that and we make choices that don’t necessarily serve are our highest good. If we can access these methods like reading our own akashic records or Tarot, we can open and clear the doors of perception to be able to access Carl Jung’s collective unconscious and within there, is this amazingly colorful body of wisdom, intelligence and clear seeing.

This only seems supernatural and spooky to the untrained eye, par with for example, an indigenous, isolated native from the Brazilian rain forest seeing an airplane and thinks it’s a God. There’s actually nothing particularly fantastic or supernatural happening. You could say that this faculty of going inward and perceiving the ground of our collective unconscious would be something that would be exceedingly natural. Anyway, this is my own personal experience. Instead of relying on other people to tell me how to live or what my highest truth is, I found an amazing an immediate way of accessing our own akashic records and it works like a charm every single time and it’s free!

The Lineage of Edgar Casey, Rudolph Steiner and Linda Howe

How to make the collective unconscious- conscious. I read a book from Linda Howe called How to Read The Askashic Records and got trained on how to read these, which is a facet of the community of Rudolf Steiner, Edgar Casey and the Theosophical Society.  I am grateful to her for empowering us all on how to access our highest selves. It costs nothing other than time and a sincere desire to look at ourselves and our lives, honestly, with a willingness to change and grow. The scholarly history of this process isn’t super important for now. I think each of us, if we happen to be at a crossroads of our life and are questioning about career, love or what would serve our highest good, I invite everyone of us to try to do this. I’m going to offer some exceedingly simple instructions that have been proven to work for me.

How to Read Your Records

So basically you sit in a very quiet place alone with yourself and you feel a sense of inner stillness calm. Then you read the prayer below, called the Pathway Prayer Process© which is a nondenominational prayer that opens to what Linda Howe calls the forces of light. She mentions God, I don’t happen to believe in God but I say it anyway and imagine it as a facet of the collective unconscious wisdom. Then, I recorded myself on the computer with QuickTime audio and I ask the question into the space that I’m wanting to understand. Then, I go into a moment of silence. When I feel a sense of everything completely settling down and inner silence, and the body being grounded without there being any mental pictures, at that moment I consider the “records” to be opened. From there, I begin to answer my own question and it’s really interesting what happens at that moment. It’s almost like you access this undercurrent of interdimensional wisdom and… it works every single time. You don’t have to be particularly psychic, or an oracle because we have access to that wisdom within us. It’s almost like every moment, it’s tapping on our shoulder wanting to come to the surface. So we don’t need to spend any money on divinations or other people to see what our highest truth is. This highest truth is often chomping at the bit to come out!

So go ahead, take about half an hour with yourself and download this prayer and just read it. I light candles and incense and ensure that I will not be interrupted by pets, phone and family. There’s one part that you want to do after you finish the prayer, before you say “The Records are Now Open.” You actually want to say your name three times out loud and that opens up the records of your own particular karmic propensities, archetypes and life template. You’d be surprised at how much wisdom is within you!

We Can All Wake Up!

I invite each of us, whenever there’s a question or something that’s confusing or something that’s really painful, to open up our own records and listen to what the universe has to say to us. I’ve even done it such that you can “open up the records” for someone else, and ask for wisdom and insight for something that can be unclear. It works every time it’s really amazing. Virtually any person with basic faculties can do this. I have absolutely no spiritual propensities or talent and didn’t believe in it all, and it still works. If you’d like to confirm what you might be feeling or any residual questions I will sometimes back that up with an official divination from my Buddhist teacher friends. I work for an organization called the Breeze of Delight, where you can ask spiritual questions and they’ll do a similar process and then come back to you with their support and suggestions for where you’re at. However they can take weeks or months, and this works even better.

Have fun with this process and I encourage everyone to really, just try it and you be surprised by the depth of wisdom from what arises!

Download it here:

https://lindahowe.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/05/Pathway-Prayer-Process.pdf


Images: https://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/File:AkashiographicESpell.jpg

thieves

The History of Thieves Oil

In times of plague, pandemic and now Covid, humans have relied on powerful essential oils to utilize their anti-bacterial qualities. The historic folklore of this famous Thieves remedy is quite intriguing. The use of thieves oil dates back to the year 1413, at the time, the notorious Bubonic Plague was devastating a large portion of France. The black plague spread like wild fire among the citizens, and the doctors equally. It seemed impossible to be in the area without contracting it, and in the time, the illness resulted in an ultimate, gruesome death. Contracting this illness, very similar to our current pandemic, resulted in severe influenza symptoms with a bacteria infecting the blood system, ending in death.
In this time, however, four burglars were captured and accused of stealing from the ill and dying. The thieves never contracted the plague, despite the close contact with the Black Death victims. During this time, the offenses of theft were punishable by burning alive. The judge was so intrigued by how the thieves had stayed immune to this dreadful disease, that he told them if they shared their secret he’d spare them of their dire fate. The thieves told the judge their secret: they wore a perfume prepared with an essential oil and spice recipe that whenever applied to their hands, temples, ears, feet & a mask over their mouths, kept them safe from infection. They blended cloves, lemon, cinnamon, lavender, and rosemary and applied the mix to their body and a mask that they wore over their own mouth. The judge stayed true to his word. The men weren’t burned alive, but instead they were hanged for their crimes. The Black Death Doctors later adopted this formula, and wore a pointed mask, filled with these spices and oils that looked like a beak. This was the inception of the name for medical “quackery.”
I however, happen to appreciate this powerful formula, and stand by it’s amazing scent and antibacterial properties. Today, I made my own at home “Thieves” essential oil blend and made a diluted powerful non-toxic antibacterial home spray cleanser too, the home smells like lemon, clove and eucalyptus. This is amazingly spicy, like to have a home filled with chai tea, much more appealing than citronella bug spray, and does repel bugs too! A few drops of this blend can be put in an atomizer or warm vapo bath to help to open up respiration and detoxify your home. It’s very powerful though so make sure to… Dilute! Dilute! I was able to make about 20 ounces of it and it’s really strong with an apricot carrier oil for under $30. One bottle of Young Living Thieves if you can get it as it sells out now, is about $45 for 1 ounce.

The Alchemy of Making Oils

In the tradition of wild-crafting essential oils, inspired by pagans and Steinerian schools of thought as exemplified with Dr. Hauschka, the oils are best if wild-crafted. These oils I use are 100% pure essential oils, but not wildcrafted or organic, they are moderately priced and good for cleaning. Some alchemists are sensitive to the “energy” of crafting oils, even going to far as to place the oils back outside to absorb the essences from moonlight. We wont go that far since we are just blending ready made oils. However, I like to have the kitchen very clean before, play some heartwarming music and set my intention to heal as I’m blending these. Yes we too can be modern day, energy sensitive alchemists, that help to heal our world, starting right at home!

Ingredients:

1 oz. Pure Clove Oil
1 oz. Pure Rosemary Oil
1 oz. Pure Cinnamon Oil
.5 oz. Lemon Eucalyptus Oil
16 oz Apricot Oil (Any neutral base carrier oil)

Tools:

bottles to replace oil
funnel
pot or plastic bowl to stir
metal stirring spoon
2 bpa free plastic or glass spray bottles

Directions:

Pour all oils into a pan and stir until well blended
Use a funnel liquid pouring container and re-pour into bottles
To use as a cleaner, pour .5oz into a spray bottle, add 2T of castile soap and shake, shake every time before use as the oil will separate
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D.I.Y. Thieves Essential Oil and Cleaner

The Alchemy of Making Oils
In the tradition of wild-crafting essential oils, inspired by pagans and Steinerian schools of thought as exemplified with Dr. Hauschka, the oils are best if wild-crafted. These oils I use are 100% pure essential oils, but not wildcrafted or organic, they are moderately priced and good for cleaning. Some alchemists are sensitive to the "energy" of crafting oils, even going to far as to place the oils back outside to absorb the essences from moonlight. We wont go that far since we are just blending ready made oils. However, I like to have the kitchen very clean before, play some heartwarming music and set my intentional to heal as I'm blending these. Yes we too can be modern day, energy sensitive alchemists, that help to heal our world, starting right at home!

Equipment

  • bottles to replace oil
  • funnel
  • pot or plastic bowl to stir
  • metal stirring spoon
  • 2 bpa free plastic or glass spray bottles

Ingredients
  

  • 1 oz. Pure Clove Oil
  • 1 oz. Pure Rosemary Oil
  • 1 oz. Pure Cinnamon Oil
  • .5 oz. Lemon Eucalyptus Oil
  • 16 oz. Apricot Oil Any neutral base carrier oil

Instructions
 

  • Pour all oils into a pan and stir until well blended
  • Use a funnel liquid pouring container and re-pour into bottles
  • To use as a cleaner, pour .5oz into a spray bottle, add 2T of castile soap and shake, shake every time before use as the oil will separate

 

As you all know, cutting out/ eating less meat is a great way to decrease our carbon footprint- this healthy, veggie infused semi-gourmet Mediterranean Vegetarian Meat Loaf comes out really well- do try it! Its great with mashed potatoes or mashed cauliflower and a roasted red pepper sauce as a condiment.

2 packs (800g) of Impossible/ Beyond Burger/ Lightlife ground veg. “meat”
1/2 diced organic onion
1 diced organic red and green pepper
1/2 cup of breadcrumbs or panko
2 eggs (best from our organic backyard city chickens ;) )
1 c. sliced kalamata olives
3/4 brick of feta cheese
1/3 c olive oil
salt, black and white pepper and Italian seasoning to taste!

Form into a loaf and place on parchment paper and lay on cookie sheet.

Cook 350 degrees F for 1 hour.

Modified veg recipe thanks to aunt Ulla Broander Ödahl, who lived on Cyprus!

vegearian mealoaf scaled

Mediterranean Vegetarian Meat Loaf

As you all know, cutting out/ eating less meat is a great way to decrease our carbon footprint- this semi-gourmet Mediterranean Vegetarian Meat Loaf came out really well- do try it!
Prep Time 30 minutes
Cook Time 1 hour

Equipment

  • Cookie Sheet
  • Parchment Paper (optional)

Ingredients
  

  • 2 packs 800g of Beyond Burger/ Lightlife ground veg. "meat"
  • 1/2 diced organic onion
  • 1 diced organic red and green pepper
  • 1/2 cup of breadcrumbs or panko
  • 2 eggs best if you have organic backyard chickens
  • 1 c. sliced kalamata olives
  • 3/4 brick of feta cheese
  • 1/3 c olive oil
  • 2 tsp salt black and white pepper and Italian seasoning to taste!

Instructions
 

  • Cook 350 degrees for 1 hour.

Notes

Modified veg recipe thanks to aunt Ulla Broander Ödahl, who lived on Cyprus!

 

Food photo created by timolina – www.freepik.com

healthy love

I think in these days of speed and trauma and a lot of us living in the Internet, I think we’ve learned maladaptive patterns of what it is to be in a healthy relationship. If we’ve grown up with a dysfunctional family, we may not even know what that is. Oftentimes love is just a series of manipulations and games, based on our brokenness and our unhealed wounding. We’re so afraid of getting hurt that we wind up withdrawing and hurting the other person first. Love can be just become a sad strategic game of power and control. Psychological and emotional abuse can be some of the only ways that people know how to relate. Unhealthy dynamics of narcissism and codependency, where you have a push me-pull you based on our co/core brokenness can become the norm.

I have the good fortune of being married for 20 years and have a healthy family and daughter, but it was hard forged. I came from a dysfunctional family and had myriads of abusive relationships before meeting my husband in my late 20s. Before him, I was even attacked a few times, once it was sadly close to deadly. I wasn’t able to see the red flags and from my naïveté and lack of experience, I didn’t know what types of men to stay away from and what types to accept. Thankfully, I did learn and I chose a very stable, grounded and clear person that has said that he would stay with me for my entire life.

However, no marriage is perfect and no person is perfect. We all have our strengths and weaknesses, personality flaws and capacities. The greatest danger in a long-term marriage is you can stop listening to each other, take each other for granted and you stop learning and growing. It happens all too often that the relationship over many years begins to flatline. I believe at this point, that marriages can fail. I think we’re hardwired two want to learn, to grow, to better ourselves and evolve through honest self reflection and introspection. I think it’s important for us to examine what real healthy love looks like versus unhealthy patterns.

I have always felt that relationship *is* the path, so the quality of love and how we are with those close to us, is our spiritual teacher, is everything. I’ve heard time and time again, from people on their deathbed, that the only thing that they say really mattered to them was the people that they love and any regrets that they have for anyone that they’ve hurt. Even people who have great devotion in some faith very rarely talk about the afterlife or their religious beliefs, it always comes down to the people who we treasured and who love us.

The first step I find in being able to be in healthy relationship is to be in a healthy relationship with myself. Do I talk to myself with a sense of gratitude, appreciation, forgiveness and kindness? Do I do the things that involve self-care like eating well, exercise, meditating and living my life’s calling as best as I can? Our romantic relationships will be a reflection of how we love, talk to and treat ourselves. From there, I think we naturally choose people that are capable of loving in a healthy way, are able to problem solve if difficulties arise and most importantly, people who can apologize and make personal change if they happen to make a mistake.

This is the single most key that differentiates a person with solid, closed, defensive narcissistic tendencies, from someone that is on some type of spiritual path of self awakening. This list above is a very simple and good guideline for us to examine the difference between genuine healthy love and love that is codependent based on our wounding and our trauma. I always say just like Jung’s image of the shadow, the moment you shine a light on a shadow, it disappears. I believe the no matter what happen to us in this life, no matter how much pain we are in, no matter how much trauma, all of us with some effort, deserve to love well and to be loved well. I don’t think any of us are cursed to be doomed to live a life of lonely solitude because of the things that happen to us. Once again, looking at how we can create the greatest love within and without is to me, the essence of the entire, truly brave, spiritual path.

BOULDER, CO – June 23: U.S. Representative Jared Polis gets scarves placed over his shoulders by the His Holiness the Dalai Lama during the Eight Verses of the Mind event at the Coors Events Center June 23, 2016. (Photo by Andy Cross/The Denver Post)

I just wanted to share this little moment of inspiration that became one of my most treasured repositories of strength. I was working for a congressman who wanted to leave his congressional seat and run for governor. This was Jared Polis, I worked for him two times, once for his reelection campaign as an incumbent in 2016, and then when he wanted to become the governor of Colorado.

I got started volunteering actively for the Democratic Party because of him a number of years ago. The Dalai Lama was teaching in Denver and Jared was asked to introduce him. Jared offered him a white offering scarf called a khata and bowed beautifully. Jared talked so much about peace and social action, and said that to have the privilege of meeting the Dalai Lama and speaking was one of the most treasured of his career. There had been a recent gruesome school shooting the very night before and he was going to leave from the event to go to DC, to protest gun laws on the house floor to do some type of sit in. I was more moved by these words, and they stayed with me, even in light of hearing His Holiness, as I felt a burning, strong desire to fulfill our vows to help the world like Jared was doing. I was ready to follow him to DC and protest right along with him and it turned out, that at that moment, I began to do just that.

After a child massacre, as a mother of a young teenage daughter, the only child I have, you have a particular grief and desire to protect them from any harm. The love is so strong that, indeed hell hath no fury. I cried and I was so appreciative of his civic duty. Jared, a native Boulderite, a person that was inspired by our Buddhist tradition and yet completely utterly fearlessly engaged with our world. He was trying was to make social change to benefit our lives, in a world that was becoming darker, more violent and broken. Jared grew up with wealth and privilege and I always felt that his heart and motivation was in the right place, he had integrity and could be trusted.

Since I was 12, I had been involved with some type of activism. I went to a New England boarding school, and during summers, worked for Greenpeace and Ralph Nader’s PIRG. I worked on a couple of democratic campaigns and my mother worked for the United Nations in New York. She worked for UNICEF, and helped to bring awareness to the global exploitation of young girls who had no human rights: child brides, sexual and physical abuse, and often sold, trafficked and had no voice. Our family wasn’t wealthy or privileged, but I had some interesting exposure to some changemakers, ethics and progressive ideas. My family imparted to me, a lot of political and social awareness, mostly concerns about our environment and clean energy. As soon as I heard Jared say that he was going to go and do a sit-in help our children, at that moment I knew I wanted to work even harder as an activist in my civic duty and social engagement. He became one of my role models of compassion and efficacy, and I am inspired by him and forever grateful.

Congressman Jared Polis and Dawn Boiani at NoLabels Conference 2017

So this brings me to the small story. His gubernatorial bid was very very close. He was running against a very powerful, cheerful and progressive female candidate who was really loved, who won most delegates at our statewide caucuses and who was our previous Colorado State Treasurer. I had the privilege of speaking for Jared on his behalf at our caucus and county assembly and was elected to be a state delegate for him. However he was in the minority, and we were all so sad and disappointed that it didn’t seem like he’d have any chance. I, at that point was working as a legislative intern for the Colorado State Capitol for very progressive, green energy senator. The word around the capitol concurred that Jared had absolutely no chance of winning a purple state with a lot of gun advocates, conservative Christians and people would not approve of his sexual preference. Jared is very publicly gay, being married, in a long term relationship with a man and they have two children. Jared is the kindest of parents and he is devoted to his children and a listening, compassionate friend to everyone he meets. However, for those that were working in state politics, we were very worried about political backlash and losing the state to his republican opponent Walker Stapleton.

These amazing, benevolent people I’ve met in public service now in Colorado and DC, some of them are so fearless, they work to help our world tirelessly and there’s no sense of selfishness. I think politicians can go one way or the other, they can do it as some type of self-aggrandizement for money, power and control and then there are others that really truly work tirelessly and make personal sacrifices to benefit our world. Jared is undoubtedly, one of those people in the latter.

So, Jared was giving this talk in Boulder and there was a kind of quiet unspoken solemnness around the community of his supporters. We felt from the caucus results where he barely made the ballot, and other controversial things about his energy policy, that he didn’t really have that strong of a chance to win. Even with him being powerful, with name recognition and money, to try to go up against some who have closed minds in our state, to consider a gay gentleman in Colorado, seemed like an untenable task. So I remember one day, he’s at a fundraising event and standing up on a deck and he looks out to us and with great sincerity says:

 

“I’m going to try
I might fail but
I’m guaranteed to fail
if I don’t try.”
Jared Polis

 

Ever since he said that, this quote and aspiration completely struck my heart and has forever stayed with me. Sometimes, something might happen to you where all odds are against you, everyone dissuades you and all you have left is your own internal voice of strength and knowing the truth of what your heart is telling you to do. Sure, we can give up, feel powerless and take the easy path of escapism, putting our hands up and not believing in our ability to manifest something, it happens to us all the time.

But maybe once or twice in this life, if something pulls you so strongly that you can’t ignore your heart screaming out to what you would like to create. You have to go beyond your fear, beyond what you ever thought your limitations were and at least try. Sure we might fall, we might fail, we might get hurt, we might get crushed but we’re guaranteed to fail if we don’t listen to our heart and at least try. Thank you Jared for that moment of intense wisdom and strength and I live by it now.

May we all manifest fully, visualize a better world and potential in the future, and create the absolute best lives that we’re capable of. I think we must listen and follow our heart’s call no matter who says it’s impossible or who dissuades you, or how many seeming obstacles and naysayers. It would be amazing to find this voice of deep knowing and sometimes you’re the only one that really has your back and sees what you could be!

Jared did win our governorship and he’s done an amazing job in this difficult time and we’re so grateful to him. I know he had a good support system and powerful mom behind him that told him no matter his sexual preference he could burst through whatever social limitations that society and our time  and culture put upon him. He’s a groundbreaker; maybe if we all similarly follow the truth in our hearts, we can be that too. Thank you Jared for your faith in yourself, in me, the privilege to volunteer on campaigns for you, your leadership in our nation and state, and may your work and heart inspire us all.

 


Image: https://www.denverpost.com/2016/06/23/dalai-lama-boulder-visit/

I was a hopeful spiritual seeker and found the exotic and colorful, Tibetan Buddhism when I was 19. I recall when I started on this Buddhist path and went to Naropa, a Buddhist inspired university, they gave me all types of warnings, saying “think twice before you embark upon this path.” They said it was powerful, transformative and even dangerous. I went over and lived in Nepal and studied with a very powerful yogic master and one of my other teachers said “well the further into it you get the more committed to it you’ll have to be.” I didn’t really pay attention or understand what he meant at the time.

I must admit I was kind of mesmerized because we have different levels and different teachings that are considered advanced and secret, and the moment I heard the word secret I had the feeling that just I had to have *all* of the teachings. 25 years later, I actually had the good fortune (or burden) of going pretty deep and collecting almost the entire wide breadth of the Tibetan Buddhist Tantric path. Indeed I had now, a one way ticket to blissful enlightenment, or so I thought.

Some of the fundamental teachings say that ‘Life is Suffering’ but we could, if we meditated and implement these practices, actually find a way out of suffering. What they don’t tell you however when you come through the doors and you start meditating and having all the warm fuzzy feeling of a blessed environment and friends, is that you’re ready to embark upon a path that’s going to go deeper and overturn and break you like you’ve never known before.

The Dharma centers never really put that type of “warning” information of what’s really going happen to you on the advertising brochures. So for many years, I did simple sitting meditation and then compassion practices and then some pretty fruitional  powerful yogic practices. I remember doing my preliminary practices, you have to basically throw your body to the ground hundred thousand times like a reverent squat thrust in namaste.

I would often find myself crying and I didn’t quite understand why. I think doing these practices shook up dormant grief and while it was happening, it was painful but then after the practice session, I would always feel really cleansed and bright. The Buddhist saints of old, that created these Buddhist foundational practices have perfected a mind-transformation technology that knows how to cultivate us, so that we become open conduits for more wisdom and evolution.

The further into this path I got, it sometimes feels like it’s like two steps forward and one step back. Last year I did a month long meditation retreat and I was feeling super joyous and positive. Every morning waking up, roasted coffee and doing yoga with sunshine, silence in a lovely retreat home. I was actually a little bit spiritually prideful and smug, feeling that I had really achieved the state of complete peace where all of my anxiety, desire and deep-seated fears had now, completely subsided.

Then… something happened where I had a strange confluence of meeting someone, a catalyst “twin flame” type, that triggered the deepest and darkest stuff that I had no idea was still within me. I went from feeling completely enlightened, on a crystalline rainbow cloud, to some of the darkest night of the soul sludge, you could possibly imagine. I’ve spent the last year crying about stuff that I don’t even have a name for. Things like early memories of being neglected in the crib, child abuse, regret for my mistakes and hurting people, looking at moments where I feel that I am not lovable or good. I was having really deep self reflections about whatever obstacles prevent me from having self-love, self forgiveness and loving others with real compassion and clarity. OMFG.

I’ve had to spend a good part of the year going inward and journaling and seeking tons of professional grief counseling and meditating and mostly just crying pretty much sometimes one or more hours per day. My family has looked at me and wondered “what is happening to her how can she be so incredibly heartbroken what is going on?” Was she abused, hormones, no one and nothing could help me, but me. However I know myself, there were a few deep healing crises before, and I trusted that this is a just giant karmic chunk arising and with sufficient time and care and patience, I could see it all clearing and dissipating.

I’m actually so grateful to have this dark stuff come up, it’s like the healing crisis of Ebenezer Scrooge in the book A Christmas Carol, where at some point you really have to face your own patterns, karma, personality, your own obstacles and your own blocks and make a decision about who you want to be at a crossroads in your life. I’ve now reevaluated what feels false in me, in my life, in my marriage and in my career; pretty much every single thing I’m reflecting on now. So this is been an excruciatingly painful, deep healing insight, going into the muck of tears and fears, and plunging out gnarly, dark stuff that I was previously unwilling to look at.

It’s not yoga mats, candles, bells and phurbas… our most powerful spiritual implement:

Some of my new age friends have judged me for not being “love and lighty” enough and even some dharma friends for seeming stuck or “dramatic” (?(*&*%!!), but I know that the way out is through. I must endure facing whatever karmic baggage that I’ve been carrying around for this or many lifetimes. Some of these friends in both the city and country, sadly, are clearly suppressing and bypassing and only acting “spiritual,” you can see and feel that they haven’t done this deep soul work yet. So with the painful confluence of meeting this dear Dharma catalyst friend that caused this whole healing crisis to be set into motion, I’m really grateful for this process because now I have a chance to really grow up spiritually.

One of the greatest solaces is that I have found some strength to be able to go deep into the dark shadow and know that whatever we experience will pass. If you’re crying out great amounts of grief or anxiety you can always tell yourself this, “how I’m feeling right now is just a temporary state,” so therefore you can experience it fully without any type of blocks or resistance. Just let all of the stuff that’s there come up and out, like purging venom from a bite. It’s really a privilege to have the time and space to go deeply in this life. A lot of us have to work full time and rarely get any retreat time and healing time or time for grief that really needs to be processed. So, I invite all of us as much as we can, even take a whole weekend, take time with yourself and give a voice and space to whatever is there- sadness anxiety, personality shortcomings and really self reflect. This is the very essence of the genuine spiritual path and it’s not at all calm and peaceful, it’s more akin to acute anguish, consternation at times, until these deep blocks clear. My teacher Tenzin Wangyal always says:

“The way to find the light within you is to face the darkness”

May all of us really take the time needed, to uncover the powerful and radiant light that already exists within us.

 

Written By Dawn Boiani-Sandberg

Owner of Buddhistmala.com

Photo by Oluremi Adebayo from Pexels

“Don’t look outside
outside happiness
outside love is great
we need it
but without essence love…

we might not be able
to receive love
because we are
receiving
from our hollowness
we must receive love
from the basis of
this okay-ness

we must give love
from this wellbeing
to others…

Please expand this love…
gradually the essence love
will express it’s own
expression
as loving kindness

it carries a wish for
everyone to be happy…

and this essence love
expresses as compassion
may all beings be free
from suffering…

the guts will arise
the courage
Bodhisattva courage
will arise
from this essence love

you need nothing
for yourself
you are fulfilled by the
essence love…

and now
you are no more hungry
for love

you are the love

the only thing is that
you give love now

and this kind of confidence
courage
will emerge out of
acknowledgment of
essence love”

Short excerpt from Sept, 2020 Zoom Retreat on Essence Love (Tib.) ཐིག་ལེ


Photo: https://tsoknyirinpoche.org/rinpoche/

Tsoknyi Rinpoche is a Tibetan Buddhist Teacher who lives in Nepal. Widely recognized as an outstanding meditation teacher, he is the author of three books: Open Heart Open Mind, Carefree Dignity, and Fearless Simplicity.

“The wound is the place where the Light enters you.” ~Rumi

 

Spiritual Bypassing, Using Religion to Build Up Ego

As westerners who chose to be involved with eastern religion, it is safe to say, we were looking for something greater. Tibetan Buddhism took root in the United States during the 1960s where people were spiritual seekers and often involved in the psychedelic movement. A lot of us came from a great amount of curiosity, disappointment and loss. A large portion of us came from dysfunctional families, divorce or even outright abuse. We were told that if we were to take complete refuge in this religion that all of our cares would cease. We could follow a very tried and true graduated path that would bring meaning to our lives, quell our emotional, spiritual and psychological problems and result in us attaining enlightenment, if we devoted ourselves to it sufficiently.

The problem is, is that unless we come into the spiritual path with having a basis of feeling well, a basic sense of warmth, well-being, groundedness, and the harsh barbs of our trauma being resolved, there’s a tendency for ego to slip in and use even positive methods of liberation for its own constructs. If we use the dharma to feel superior, pretend that we are more knowledgeable, spiritually evolved than others, hide, cower and escape from our vulnerability, our fears or our deep karmic wounding, the dharma itself becomes a method to spiritually bypass and therefore itself, a worldly dharma. Spiritual bypassing is akin to hopping over our issues, our deep karmic blocks by denying, projecting them into others or ignoring, and then using one’s religion or spirituality as a faux front.

We will have devoted our lives to something wheres it is impossible to make any progress because the fundamental obstacles have never been touched, opened and routed out. Chögyam Trungpa clearly explains this process in his book Cutting Through Spiritual Materialism. It is like my teacher would say-

“If we don’t practice properly and really use these methods to evolve, it’s like going to an island of diamonds and coming back empty-handed.” Tulku Urgyen Rinpoche

84000 Methods Can Be Absconded By Ego

Ego is very slippery, like a shapeshifter, and can use these methods in the dharma to build itself up. We often see fluctuation between pompous credential or an opiated escape, neither are enlightened. For example, if the way that you hide from pain is that you have some type of avoidant personality disorder and withdraw, will you find a particular part of the vast body of Buddhist teachings to confirm your propensity. You will then withdraw from society and hide and consider yourself really spiritual and in concurrence with the scriptures.

If you happen have a propensity for hedonism or sexual addiction, we have a controversial Saint named Drukpa Kunley who would unhesitatingly sleep with whomever he wanted to. You could use Dharma teachings to say that “morality is relative” and everything is part of the absolute manifestation of sacredness, and thereby justify sexual misconduct. How can this be spiritual? Both are sides of the same type of spiritual ego, and none of these propensities, I believe, can make any progress in this life until they breakdown the constructs of what they’re using to cover. Sadly, for many I see no sign of hope as of yet, it is all about “virtue signaling,” being “spiritualistas” or “spiritual slactivists.”

Guru Devotion as a Weapon

One western Tibetan reincarnated teacher called a “tulku” recently said to me:

“The intense mind control and hierarchical culture of obedience is something I’m really uncomfortable with now. I actually think more people got hurt through that than from sexual abuse itself.”

Yes we have a religion where we offer the guru absolute control and blind obeisance. You can imagine if anyone has seen the miniseries Wild Wild Country, how well that works out. We have this unbreakable vow that we take with the teacher, that if we break or leave the teacher or community or speak ill of them or even have a negative thought, we’re supposed to go to this terrible mind torture hell in the afterlife, and/or be riddled with personal obstacles and punishments. This vow which is supposed to help us to make spiritual progress is often used as a weapon of control and ownership of students. This does nothing but create cult-like communities and spiritual, psychological and emotional harm to so very many.

Toxic Masculinity

We can credit a lot of this social dysfunction to the term toxic masculinity. Human society has a very long history of the suppression of the feminine, considering emotionality to be weak and women to be subordinate, unstable, second class citizens or even, in some cultures, property.  Many men to this day, often believe that they are far superior to women with an undercurrent of continued social misogyny that exists in all cultures. I personally practice in a very male-dominated religion in Tibetan Buddhism where we are instructed to worship these men as divine. In that culture they have a word for women which literally translates as lesser human. Very few women have any power or real voice and it is disheartening to see this panel of colored robed, throned men telling us how to live. Many know that behind the scenes there are volumes of power, control, sexual misconduct, financial and ethics issues galore. I say it is high time for women to take leadership roles in both religion, spirituality and politics, to clean up a lot of this toxicity and corruption.

A study in the Journal of School of Psychology uses the following definition to explain toxic masculinity: “the constellation of socially regressive [masculine] traits that serve to foster domination, the devaluation of women, homophobia, and wanton violence.”

In modern society, people often use the term toxic masculinity to describe exaggerated masculine traits that many cultures have widely accepted or glorified.

This harmful concept of masculinity also places significant importance on ‘manliness’ based on:

  • strength
  • lack of emotion
  • self-sufficiency
  • dominance
  • sexual virility”

https://www.medicalnewstoday.com/articles/toxic-masculinity#what-it-is

Real Spiritual Work Is Dirty

Karmic knots, emotional issues that we hold keep us stuck, however there is hope. By touching the wounds, our tears and fears, we can wholly liberate them. This is the crack of light that is possible. People come in to a tradition with trauma, loss, in pain and longing and are instructed to apply these high eastern yogic methods. It is not working; we need a new way of real liberation which includes deep fundamental trauma work and the base of healing before embarking on any spiritual path.

My Teacher’s Advice

I was practicing meditation in Denmark and really reflecting about my life. I’ve mentioned before, that I came from pretty serious child abuse and neglect, and I was crying about how it would ever be possible for me to feel happy and healed in this life at all, ever. Then, during my meditation practice an insight came to me. I could take the foundation of this pain and the abuse that I experienced early on, and try to heal from it and then use it later on in life as a way of deepening compassion for others that might have experienced something similar. That was the impetus for why I started to teach meditation in prisons, and learned so much about human growth, regret and real hands-on spirituality. I think if anyone wants to do any type of real spiritual work you have to get down and dirty, here are 4 steps to get started:

  1. Spend time with yourself in a very raw and honest way and feel where you’re stuck.
  2. We can journal about where our strengths and weaknesses are and look at ourselves with tremendous honesty.
  3. If we notice that we have some type of these dormant fears and wounding and pain, take the time to honor stuck places.
  4. We can use the retreat time that we have to face our fears head-on, cry out all the tears until there are no more, like a sponge ringing out dirty water.

It is so helpful to make the effort to cleanse these psycho-spiritual and emotional blocks built up from our lifetime or more. In this way, we can truly become a clear vessel that’s capable of wisdom. Without having gone through this messy, difficult dark night of the soul process, there’s a strong possibility that we are using our spirituality or religion in a deluded way, to cover the deep-seated blocks that we’re unwilling to face.

East Meets.. West

I think these Indo-Tibetan methods used 2500 years ago in India and in Tibet, were exceedingly valid and powerful methods of transformation and spiritual development. In our materialistic west, which allows no time for grief, we have often a lot of gross trauma and imbalances to heal before we can even start sitting meditation. If we don’t do the trauma work and we just sit alone with ourselves, let alone do any of the higher tantras which involve powerful methods of yogic practice ritual, those methods become ways to make us further imbalanced and can be actually dangerous. So this trauma work, taking time to delve deep into what has been hurtful, processing fears, going very deeply to core childhood or karmic wounding, is an essential step before we embark upon any more lofty spiritual path. Many often benefit from personal or professional support for this healing process. We could say that this is the basic foundation of the spiritual path. Real human strength and evolution is forged through bravely facing fears, heartbreak and tears, not bypassing or some renunciant escape. So go ahead, get curious about the cracks in our deepest, hidden wounds. Our hearts long to emerge from the shadows and see what type of welcome light can eventually come in. I have faith that with effort, we all have a capacity to learn, grow and heal, no matter what we have experienced. The human heart is forever fundamentally bright, and sometimes, the accumulated tarnish, just needs a bit of polishing.

Written By Dawn Boiani-Sandberg

Owner Buddhistmala.com

 


image from pexels

This hot sauce is amazingly flavorful and versatile. It’s like Tibetan Momo (dumpling) sauce, called Sepen, but it’s oil and chili based rather than tomato. The recipe is highly coveted. I begged for my Buddhist Shambhala friends to disclose the most profound secret teaching, my friend claimed that it’s the “most important” wisdom we hold. It is, of course, the highly desired recipe for… this Tibetan Hot Sauce famous at Shambhala Mountain Center formally known as RMDC. This transmission is highly guarded by our Buddhist military called the Dorje Kasung, (non-Shambhalians, don’t ask). After they accomplish secret such and such, they were rewarded with this recipe. Well, safe to say, no one would dare leak this vow protected info, so I was forced to uncover my own “inner wisdom,” and sure enough, was able to make a very close replica! I’m sharing my gnostic, guru-less discovery below. It’s really great, its like a dense chili sambal, and much better than the store bought Chinese dragon siracha we all use. You can put it on Tibetan Momo dumplings, stir fry’s, eggs, Mexican food, anything. It’s well worth making~ download this recipe, ok here goes….

Spontaneously Arisen Tibetan Hot Sauce Transmission

Dawn Lhamo’s Recipe

1/2c olive oil
1.5c water
1/3c hemp oil (or sesame)
45g red chili flakes
45g of chili power
1tsp cayenne pepper
3T dried onions (or fresh)
3T fresh minced garlic (or powder)
2T puréed ginger (or powder)
2g 5 star anise
1T salt
1 tsp sugar

Choose a heavy bottom sauté pot. I sautéed minced onions and garlic and ginger in oil then put all other ingredients in with water and let it cook lightly about 10 min med. heat. Let cool and store in air tight containers or jar. Makes about 2 full medium jam jars. Svaha!

 


And when I was asking around for these well kept secrets, two other recipes arose from whistleblowers, I haven’t tried these the third, but they might be closer to the original. If you start heating herbs and spices BE CAREFUL, they can burn, and it wastes the whole batch, yes I did that. The secret in these two below is that you heat the oil, and carefully pour the hot oil onto the spices, so they never get cooked on the stove and therefore don’t burn. I may have a cook-off and try all three to see which one is best, let us know if you have any experience or try!

Tibetan Hot Sauce

Kathy Locke’s Recipe

1 pint peanut oil
1/2 c ginger
1/4 c garlic
1 c onions
1/4 c chopped red chili (fresh more)
3-5 star anise
1/4 to 1/2 c toasted sesame oil
chop everything fine
place in large pot
then separately heat to smoking the peanut oil
then pour in to large pot (will smoke)
mix
then add
3-5 star anise
1/4 to 1/2 c toasted sesame oil
good luck.


Tibetan Hot Sauce

By Hudson Shotwell

Ingredients:
3 Large Onions
22-25 good sized cloves of garlic, about two large heads worth
Ginger root, peeled, to match the amount of garlic cloves in quantity
2 oz Thai dried red crushed chili pepper with seeds
5 star anise, whole
2 level, measured teaspoons of salt, or less if you wish.
4 cups of vegetable oil

A food processor is a great way to make this beautifully hot sauce.

1. Peel and quarter the onions, process them very fine; don’t leave big pieces.
Put in the bowl.

2. Hit the garlic cloves with the flat of a large knife to release them from their skins.

3. Peel and chop the ginger and two garlic size chunks. Make your pile of ginger the same size as your pile of garlic.

4. Process the garlic and ginger together, very fine. Put them in the bowl.

5. Empty the package of crushed chili into the bowl.

6. Put the six anise seeds into the bowl.

7. Mix it all together.

8. In a separate sauce pan, heat the oil to very hot, 400 degrees, smoking, or a little hotter.

Attention! Do not leave the oil, or forget about it, or you will have a fire on your hands!

9. Take the stainless-steel bowl with all the ingredients in it, a mixing spoon, and the pan of boiling oil, outside, never mind the weather. Carefully pour the oil a little at a time onto the vegetables, stirring with a wooden spoon as the sauce should boil up, then quickly cool down.

10. Add the salt to your taste.

11. Allow the sauce to sit overnight to allow the star anise to release it’s flavor. Decant to smaller vessels in enjoy it with many kinds of food and friends.

tibetan hot sauce oil

pour hot oil cook

finished hot sauce

mamas fire hot sauce

 

hot sauce

Spontaneously Arisen Tibetan Hot Sauce Transmission

Dawn Lhamo’s Recipe

Ingredients
  

  • 1/2 c olive oil
  • 1.5 c water
  • 1/3 c hemp oil or sesame
  • 45 g red chili flakes
  • 45 g of chili power
  • 1 tsp cayenne pepper
  • 3 T dried onions or fresh
  • 3 T fresh minced garlic or powder
  • 2 T puréed ginger or powder
  • 2 g star anise 5 stars
  • 1 T salt
  • 1 tsp sugar

Instructions
 

  • Choose heavy bottom sauté pot. I sautéed minced onions and garlic and ginger in oil then put all other ingredients in with water and let it cook lightly about 10 min med. heat. Let cool and store in air tight containers or jar. Makes about 2 full medium jam jars. Svaha!

 

I was amazed to discover the very best natural face cream and now use it every.single.day. I would say it’s no less than the fountain of youth. I was taught how to make this by my flower-child neighbor who uses only the best organic and well sourced ingredients that she buys in bulk from various homemade beauty care and natural cosmetics suppliers. I know it might seem tedious to have to craft your own face cream, but it is well worth it. If you make a batch which lasts for an entire year, you can store it in the refrigerator. I swear by this, I have used the best face care products known to man like Dr. Hauschka and Evan Healy, but this is truly incomparable. It is the perfect weight and smells like citrus and vanilla. Let us know in the comments if you try this and how it feels on your skin and if indeed, all of your wrinkles magically disappear forever!

COCOA BUTTER CREAMY LOTION FOR FACE AND BODY

This nongreasy, deeply moisturizing and hydrating cream doubles as a fabulous after-sun cream. It leaves skin very soft and silky with a light, velvety “orangesicle” scent.

7 tablespoons soybean, almond, apricot kernel, or macadamia nut base oil

2 tablespoons beeswax

2 tablespoons coconut base oil (extra-virgin, unrefined)

3 tablespoon cocoa butter

1 teaspoon anhydrous lanolin

9 tablespoons distilled water

2 teaspoons vegetable glycerin

1/2 teaspoon borax x 30

1 teaspoon apple cider vinegar

20 drops sweet orange essential oil drops tangerine or sweet orange essential oil

20 drops vanilla essential oil

Recommended for: normal, dry, dehydrated, sensitive, sunburned, windburned, mature, or environmentally damaged skin (especially for dehydrated oily and combination skin in cooler, less humid seasons)

USE: Daily

PREP TIME: 1 hour approximate! 20 to 30 minutes, plus 30 minutes to set up and cool

BLENDING TOOLS: blender; long-handled, slender spatula

STORE IN:  glass or plastic jars or squeeze bottle (if storage area is very warm)

YIELD: approximately 1-1/3 cups

HEAT: In a small saucepan over low heat or in a double boiler, warm the base oils, beeswax, coco butter, and lanolin, until the cocoa butter and beeswax are just melted. In another pan, warm the water and vegetable glycerin, add the borax, and stir until the borax is incorporated.

COOL: Remove both pans from heat and allow their contents to cool almost to body temperature until the oils/wax/butter/lanolin mixture just begins to thicken and becomes slightly opaque. It will be like a soft, loose salve. This will take 5 to 10 minutes, depending on the oils/wax/butter.

BLEND: Immediately pour oil/wax/lanolin/butter mixture into into the blender, scraping the sides of the saucepan to remove every and remove every last trace. Place the lid on the blender and remove the lids plastic piece. Turn the blender on medium and slowly drizzle the water/Glycerin/Borax mixture through the center of the lid into the vortex of swirling fats below. Closely watch what happens: almost immediately, the lotion will begin to thicken. Blend for 5 to 10 seconds more. turn off the blender and check the consistency. It should have a smooth texture. If the mixtures are not combining properly, turn off the blender and give the lotion a few manual stirs with a spatula to free up the blender blades. Then replace the lid and blend on medium for another 5 to 10 seconds. Repeat process as needed.

Turn off the blender and add the essential oils, stirring a few times to mix them in, then blend completely on medium another 5 to 10 seconds, until the lotion is smooth and pale yellow

Note: If the temperature of your kitchen is above 76°F. the lotion will maintain a softer consistency. (Coconut oil turns from solid to liquid at 76°F.) If the temperature is below 76°F. the lotion will be firmer more like  a cream.

PACKAGE AND COOL: Pour the finished lotion into storage container(s). Lightly cover each container with a paper towel and allow the lotion to cool for 30 minutes before capping. If you notice after a few hours or days, that water begins to separate from the lotion, don’t worry. The mixture can separate if the fat temperature and water temperature are not relatively equal and cool enough when the two portions are blended. Keep trying — crafting perfect lotions is an art form!

No refrigeration of this product is required if it’s used within 30 days. If stored in the refrigerator, please use it within 3 to 6 months. (You may notice a change in the formula’s texture if it’s stored in the refrigerator, but this won’t affect the quality of the product.)

APPLICATION TIPS: Use 1/2 to 1 teaspoon to cover the entire face, throat, and décolleté and more as necessary for the body.

pexels dana tentis 725998

Homemade Cocoa Butter Face Cream

Recommended for: normal, dry, dehydrated, sensitive, sunburned, windburned, mature, or environmentally damaged skin (especially for dehydrated oily and combination skin in cooler, less humid seasons)
5 from 2 votes
Prep Time 1 hour

Equipment

  • BLENDING TOOLS: blender; long-handled, slender spatula

Ingredients
  

  • 7 tablespoons soybean, almond, apricot kernel, or macadamia nut base oil
  • 2 tablespoons beeswax
  • 2 tablespoons coconut base oil extra-virgin. unrefined
  • 3 tablespoon cocoa butter
  • 1 teaspoon anhydrous lanolin
  • 9 tablespoons distilled water
  • 2 teaspoons vegetable glycerin
  • 1/2 teaspoon borax x 30
  • 20 drops drops sweet orange essential oil drops tangerine or sweet orange essential oil
  • 20 drops drops vanilla essential oil
  • 1 teaspoon teaspoon apple cider vinegar

Instructions
 

  • USE: Daily
    PREP TIME: 1 hour approximate!, 20 to 30 minutes, plus 30 minutes to set up and cool
    STORE IN:  glass or plastic jars or squeeze bottle (if storage area is very warm)
    YIELD: approximately 1-1/3 cups
    HEAT: In a small saucepan over low heat or in a double boiler, warm the base oils, beeswax, coco butter, and lanolin, until the cocoa butter and beeswax are just melted. In another pan, warm the water and vegetable glycerin, add the borax, and stir until the borax is incorporated.
    COOL: Remove both pans from heat and allow their contents to cool almost to body temperature until the oils/wax/butter/lanolin mixture just begins to thicken and becomes slightly opaque. It will he like a soft, loose salve. This will take 5 to 10 minutes, depending on the oils/wax/butter/
    BLEND: Immediately pour oil/wax/lanolin/butter mixture into into the blender, scraping the sides of the saucepan to remove every and remove every last trace. Place the lid on the blender and remove the lids plastic piece. Turn the blender on medium and slowly drizzle the water/Glycerin/Borax mixture through the center of the lid into the vortex of swirling fats below. Closely watch what happens: almost immediately, the lotion will begin to thicken. Blend for 5 to 10 seconds more. turn off the blender and check the consistency. It should have a smooth texture. If the mixtures are not combining properly, turn off the blender and give the lotion a few manual stirs with a spatula to free up the blender blades. Then replace the lid and blend on medium for another 5 to 10 seconds. Repeat process as needed.
    Turn off the blender and add the essential oils, stirring a few times to mix them in, then blend completely on medium another 5 to 10 seconds, until the lotion is smooth and pale yellow
    Note: If the temperature of your kitchen is above 76°F. the lotion will maintain a softer consistency. (Coconut oil turns from solid to liquid at 76°F.) If the temperature is below 76°F. the lotion will be firmer more like  a cream.
    PACKAGE AND COOL: Pour the finished lotion into storage container(s). Lightly cover each container with a paper towel and allow the lotion to cool for 30 minutes before capping. If you notice after a few hours or days, that water begins to separate from the lotion, don't worry. The mixture can separate if the fat temperature and water temperature are not relatively equal and cool enough when the two portions are blended. Keep trying — crafting perfect lotions is an art form!
    No refrigeration of this product is required if it's used within 30 days. If stored in the refrigerator, please use it within 3 to 6 months. (You may notice a change in the formula's texture if it's stored in the refrigerator, but this won't affect the quality of the product.)
    APPLICATION TIPS: Use 1/2 to 1 teaspoon to cover the entire face, throat, and décolleté and more as necessary for the body.
Keyword cocoa butter face cream, homemade face cream

 

Photo by Dana Tentis from Pexels

What Is a Whole Foods, Plant Based Diet?

A whole foods, plant based diet uses plant sourced whole foods and avoids animal products. The plant based diet isn’t necessarily a set diet, it’s more of a lifestyle. We consume whole, minimally processed foods, and limit or avoid most animal products. We focus on plants, such as: veggies, fruits, whole grains, legumes, seeds and nuts, which makes up the majority of what we consume.

This diet excludes refined foods, such as added sugar, white bread, gmo’s and processed oils. We pay special attention to food grade, with advocates of this whole foods diet promoting locally sourced, organic food whenever possible.

It’s Not Vegan

People who follow strict vegan diets refrain from consuming any animal products, including dairy, poultry, meat, seafood, eggs and honey. Vegetarians exclude all poultry and meat from their diets, however a few vegetarians eat eggs, seafood or dairy. This plant based diet (also called WFPBD) on the other hand, it’s more flexible.

Followers eat mostly plants, but animal products are not completely off limits. While one person on the vegan diet might eat no animal product, one who follows a whole foods diet can eat modest quantities of poultry, eggs, seafood, meat or dairy. For example, pork production is one of the worst environmental pollutants of all of the factory farm industries. Once a year for Christmas, our family will purchase an organic ham, locally sourced and with great respect for that animal’s life. We are willing to pay much more for these occasional meats consumed, and found a few local farms right in the neighborhood!

For instance, we have 6 chickens, and feed them organic grains and food scraps, and they produce eggs for us every day! Our family eats well sourced, locally sourced or organic meats about once a week. It’s hard, we feel bad about it, especially when you raise animals, but the complex nutrients for growing children are recommended on occasion. Most nights, I use egg based dishes and well crafted, vegetarian meat substitutes.

This mainly plant based diet also can really help us lose weight and improve our overall health. Obesity is a problem of epidemic proportions. In fact, more than 69% of US adults are overweight or obese. Fortunately, with these simple food and lifestyle modifications we can facilitate weight reduction and have a lasting impact on health. Here are the 7 main reasons to consider:

1. A Plant Based Diet Can Be Richer in Nutrients

If you switch to a plant-based diet from a typical American diet, you’ll eliminate most animal and meat products.
We eat whole-foods, like whole grains, fruits, veggies, beans, peas, nuts and seeds.

2. It Can Help You Lose Excess Weight

An escalating number of people are turning to plant-based diets in the hope of losing excess fat.
This is perhaps for valid reason, several observational researches show that vegans have a tendency to be thinner and have lower body mass indexes (BMIs) compared to non-vegans.

3. It Appears to Lower Blood Sugar Levels and Improve Immune Function

Going plant-based may also have benefits for hypoglycemia, type 2 diabetes and declining kidney function.

4. A Plant Based Diet May Protect Against Certain Cancers

In accordance with the World Health Organization, about 1/3rd of all cancers can be prevented by factors within your control, including diet. For example, eating legumes on a regular basis might lessen your risk of colon cancer.

5. It’s Connected to a Lower Risk of Heart Disease

Eating fresh fruits, legumes, vegetables and fiber is linked to a lower chance of heart disease.

6. A Plant Based Diet Can Reduce Pain from Arthritis

Some research has reported that a plant-based diet has positive consequences in people with various kinds of arthritis.

7. Plant Based Diets Reduce Our Carbon Footprint

There is a substantial decrease in water consumption, food production and transport costs and reduction of greenhouse gas emissions with a plant-based diet. Of course, this also is much more humane for living animals, as the animal suffering, conditions and general atrocities in our factory farms is unconscionable. A WFPBD is good for you, good for mother earth! This is the easiest way you can “Go Green” and substantially decrease your carbon footprint, by up to 73%!

I offer a simple to get started, downloadable PDF, and ongoing free recipes, ones that I actually make, so please bookmark our site!

Written By Dawn Boiani, Wellness Coach. Owner of Buddhistmala.com

image: Daria Shevtsova pexels dariashevtsova.com

If I can quote Al Gore “every day when you turn on the news, it’s like a page from the Book of Revelations.” If we aren’t sad and anxious a bit now, there might be something dampened with our sensitivity! However, I’m living proof that the old that adage is true that “the darkest hour is indeed right before the dawn,” and I’d like to share my story. A series of very challenging things happened to me a few years ago: an exceedingly painful conflict with a friend, some hormonal changes and some possible legal issue happened right before getting on a plane for a family vacation in Europe. It was like a perfect storm. It was intense, emotional, I was frightened and nothing was settled.

When I arrived in Europe I had the normal jet lag, but at that point my mind and heart were spinning about all these personal issues. I had to leave with them still being unresolved. My nervous system and and my internal circadian clock became seriously out of whack. I spent my family vacation in Europe trying to meditate and sleep, but all of the problems circled around in my mind.

When I got back to the United States, I had reverse jet lag again and the problems were still painful. That set into motion about 6 months of intense anxiety, resulting in seemingly unsolvable insomnia. It was bad, I was sleeping only a few hours a week, and had terrible nightmares and existential fears when I did. I have a funny religion that believes in hells, obstacles, curses and punishments and that definitely exacerbated this internal struggle. It was like the dark night of the soul, akin to Ebenezer Scrooge, but it went on for 6 months instead of only three nights! It took all strength in me to overcome this.

I realized later, that the root of anxiety is actually heartbreak, a person can withstand a few painful, dramatic things and recover from them quite well. However, if a number of things occur at the same time, the heart reaches an overload and can’t process so much grief and stress all at once. Your nervous system goes on overload. It could be considered the infamous nervous breakdown. I reached out to everyone to try to help: doctors, lawyers, Indian chiefs. I kid you not, I was so desperate I even has a soul retrieval done by a shaman! Medical doctors tried to put me on sleeping pills, anti-anxiety medicine, whatever could help me. I was only sleeping a few hours a week, and couldn’t function in my daily life well. I was so worried that my health, mind, heart and marriage were going to be irrevocably damaged. The biggest fear was that this would be forever, would I lose everything, even my life?

So what I did, is that I was not going to take this laying down. I did not want to go on any type of allopathic medicine. They all have side effects and do strange things to your mind. Oftentimes these toxic, addictive sleeping pills stop working after awhile. You have to take more over time, and I didn’t want to be addicted to anything ever. This was not the right path for me, but I’m not suggesting that anyone stop taking their doctor prescribed medicines, as that too, can be dangerous.

What I did is, I created a holistic approach to healing anxiety and depression and getting my body back into order. I started to eat really well, exercise, journal and breathe deeply. I sought counseling to do very very deep trauma work and tried to resolve the original issue with my friend. I sought the help of friends, professionals, and more than anything believed that I could get through this difficult time. I found a good Functional Medicine doctor who was not a proponent of any type of sleeping pills or medicine for depression. He rather, put me on a protocol of fresh foods, greens and natural supplements that you could get at the health food store, to support the nervous system. For about three months, I took a very heavy protocol of herbs and over the counter supplements like: 5HTP, Gaba, Inositol, and started to take some type of very simple herb and spice based Tibetan Medicine as well. I found an amazing book, if people are having trouble sleeping called the Effortless Sleep Method that you can buy for $5 as a Kindle book on Amazon.

This all completely conquered my insomnia through a natural way, and got me sleeping deeper than ever. I realized that my anxiety was not an enemy but it was a friend. It’s the body’s light handed warning signal saying that you’ve taken on too much. It’s intention is not to be a burden for you, but it’s to remind you that it’s time to go deeply into self-care, simplify and helps to ultimately *prevent* disease.

So now, if I ever feel that I’m taking on too much and the “winds” are getting disturbed, or I’m feeling a lot of sadness or overwhelm, I take that as a sign to go immediately into calmness, meditation, and simplify my life and then restart. If you have been battling with anxiety, depression or insomnia, I’m living proof then you can recover from these imbalances go deeper into self care, form a very deep relationship with your own energetic system and come through the other side and flourish better than ever. No matter what’s happening on the “outside,” there is a strength of real self love and balance, that we can uncover. Nothing at this point, seems to be able shake that from me now, and I’m so very grateful that I went through this. We all can shine again and completely overcome anxiety and depression, with some holistic effort.

Written by Dawn Boiani, owner Sakura Designs

 

 


 


Image from pexels: https://www.pexels.com/photo/yellow-flowers-917076/

 

Bhutanese (American) Tri Color Pepper and Cheese Ema Datshi

Vegetarian (not vegan) main course~ with rice, the best one yet! I was in the Buddhist Kingdom of Bhutan for a week in 1992, and we camped out in a small remote town called Paro, it was amazing and utterly magical. Everyone should visit Bhutan someday if they can. Ema Datshi is the country’s national dish as they grow many red peppers and dry them on rooftops. Most nights we had this for dinner. It transports me back there, this does call for cheese, I will explore some vegan cheese options soon and review the best ones for melting.

Ingredients:

  1. 12 jalapeño peppers seeded and sliced lengthwise
  2. 1 each red, green yellow pepper sliced
  3. 12 dried red chilies
  4. 2T butter
  5. 2T olive oil
  6. 1t salt
  7. 1 large shallot or onion sliced
  8. 1 8oz block of Gorgonzola approx.
  9. 4 oz goat cheese (not feta)
  10. 1/2 block cream cheese

Directions:

  • sautée shallot/onion in butter
  • add all peppers and olive oil sautée
  • add 1 cup of water and salt cover and boil until peppers are soft
  • add cheese and melt stirring often like a fondue
  • serve with basmati rice
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Bhutanese Tri Color Pepper and Cheese Ema Datshi

12 jalapeño peppers seeded and sliced lengthwise 1 each red, green yellow pepper sliced 12 dried red chilies 2T butter 2T olive oil 1t salt 1 large shallot or onion sliced 1 8oz block of gorgonzola approx 4 oz goat cheese (not feta) 1/2 block cream cheese sautée shallot/onion in butter add all peppers and olive oil sautée add 1 cup of water and salt cover and boil until peppers are soft add cheese and melt stirring often like a fondue serve with basmati rice
Servings 4

Equipment

  • Sautee pot with lid

Ingredients
  

  • 12 jalapeño peppers seeded and sliced lengthwise
  • 1 each red, green, yellow pepper sliced
  • 12 dried red chilies
  • 2 T butter
  • 2 T olive oil
  • 1 t salt
  • 1 large shallot or onion sliced
  • 1 8oz block of gorgonzola approx
  • 1 4oz goat cheese not feta
  • 1/2 block block cream cheese

Instructions
 

  • Sautée shallot/onion in butter
    add all peppers and olive oil sautée
    add 1 cup of water and salt cover and boil until peppers are soft
    add cheese and melt stirring often like a fondue
    serve with basmati or Bhutanese red rice.

plant butter

The Top Three Plant Based Butters

I don’t know about you, but I for one can’t cook or barely survive for that matter, without butter. I tried a high fat Keto diet and it sent my bad cholesterol, triglycerides etc. through the roof. Now, I’m dairy free (except whey) and feeling great. I’ve been recently discovering dairy free alternatives as part of my wellness coaching program. Not only is going dairy-free good for your health and heart, but it stops horrendous animal cruelty to lactating milk cows. Plant based diets are much better for sustainability and our ecosystem, even with them being more machine processed and food transport costs. A lot of us don’t realize that cheese, especially hard cheese and imported cheeses have a much higher carbon footprint than even meat. So, this brought me to become quite a vegan-butter connoisseur, and I wanted to share with you the top three dairy free, vegan alternatives:
I’ll tell you a little bit about the pros and cons of each:

#1 European Style Cultured Vegan Butter *SALTED*

https://miyokos.com/collections/vegan-butter

Thus was the most expensive, it was about $5.99 for only 8oz.- 1/2lb. at the time, worth every penny. This was my favorite all around, the texture and most like real butter, it cost a bit more, but organic, and “nothing bad,” so well worth it. You can use it 1-1 for real butter, and it has a lovely melt-able base of coconut oil which is great for high temperature cooking. It has a hard, whitish texture like the imported Irish butter blocks.

The best overall.


Photo by Taryn Elliott from Pexels

Part of the new wellness life is to not eat any dairy, sugar or any gluten, or at least much less. I’ve seen a lot of my friends live that way but never really jumped on that restrictive bandwagon until I became a wellness coach, and it feels…great! I am however permitted to have well sourced whey powder in the morning for green smoothies and it can be used as a coffee creamer. Since I can’t use any heavy cream anymore, I’ve created a Keto version of an at-home coffee lightener that works really well and that’s nutritive, fat burning, energizing and good for your health and nervous system. There is a little bit of a problem when using a whey powder base in that if you try to put it directly in warm coffee or even cold drinks it doesn’t blend and coagulates, some floats on the top, but, there is a remedy to that. Use one heaping tablespoon of the coffee lightener in about 3 tablespoons of water and quickly whisk it together before pouring in the coffee and voilà!… it will blend beautifully.

Make a big batch and keep on hand, this is about a one month’s supply:

You will need a canister, like an oatmeal carton with lid, or an empty protein powder canister with lid, that can hold about 5 cups, and whisk.

3 cups of grass fed whey powder
1 cup of coconut MCT powder or if you use dairy, you can substitute nonfat, dry milk
1/2 cup organic collagen* powder
3T organic ashwaghanda powder

Optional: If you like your coffee sweet, you can use Monkfruit or Stevia to taste.

Blend all dry ingredients in a canister by shaking, and remember to whisk creamer in water in coffee cup, before pouring coffee.

pexels photo 1080075

Home Made Keto Coffee Creamer

Prep Time 5 minutes
Servings 30 2 tablespoons or 1 scoop
Calories 75 kcal

Equipment

  • 5 Cup Container with Lid

Ingredients
  

Instructions
 

  • Blend all dry ingredients in a canister by shaking, and remember to whisk creamer in water in coffee cup, before pouring coffee.
Keyword keto coffee, keto creamer

*collagen is an animal product, so for vegetarians, please omit


Coffee Image: Decha Huayyai
www.freepik.com/user6739663
Visit my portfolio for more free picture

We all long for and deserve the highest love.

There’s been a lot of public hype recently about something called twin flames. The notion is that there’s only one person out there that shares a very similar energetic signature that’s literally the other half of your soul. It’s deeper than a loving soulmate, it’s actually considered to be a mirror of yourself, like as if the mind/ spirit part of you split in two bodies. In Hollywood we’ve heard a lot about Megan Fox believing that her twin flame is Gun Kelly, and they share some type of special, magic, passionate, transformative and unbreakable bond.

I have some personal experience regarding this phenomenon and a few insights, since there seems to be a lot of confusion, conflict and pain associated with people’s experiences. I once encountered someone who threw my entire world upside down. I began to reevaluate my life, my religion (riddled with scandals after our #metoo movement), and my very place in this world and purpose. There was an uncanny confluence where a very short period of time spent with this person, caused me to unearth very deep core, childhood wounds that I thought that I had well-healed from.

However, even with the propensity for going deep and internal growth, there was still a lot of high conflict, hostility and projection, which caused both of us to breakdown communication and be in no contact (to survive, literally). All of this pain and rapid triggering, according to the experts, is a classic and quintessential twin flame encounter.

I broke down or open, if you will, deeply into myself and wondered “was this all my fault, what did I do wrong, what should I do to fix this, is it fixable? What happened to me in my past that could have caused such heartbreak? What happened to the other in his past where he could be so mistrustful and wounded and filled with nothing short of hatred?” After it was clear that no resolve with him at that point was possible, I sought help from my spiritual teachers and my meditation practice. I journaled, wrote poems and cried endless tears. I joined with other twin flame forums to try to parse out what was happening to me. My friends said they had never seen me as wounded and injured by anyone in my entire life. Some people were really supportive and allowed a compassionate ear for me to cry and process, and other’s victim blamed and said “oh I was too attached and I should get over all this emotionality and be in some type of more spiritually evolved, ‘higher vibration.'” I was even insulted on twin flame support forums for not being “love and light-y” enough. No one could really stop or heal the momentum of the tears of confusion, it felt like my heart had been put into a wheat thrasher.

One of the current themes of our support groups on Facebook is that people can’t assess whether or not this is a spiritual connection or classic narcissistic/borderline abuse. There are overtones of both and one thing I like to mention is that there’s a huge amount of awareness about narcissism because it is very culturally prevalent these days. We don’t talk enough about other personality disorders which are almost as statistically prevalent, namely borderline, only 1/2 a percentage point less frequently occurring in society, according to the DSMIV.

From what I read, unlike narcissism, which can be cold, borderline personality is a highly emotionally reactive type of disorder. There is often a person that gets targeted by the borderline and there’s an energetic entrainment. It’s a type of psychic, emotional vampirism, and is exceedingly destructive, poisonous, hurtful and life draining. It’s unfortunately, often the outcome for people who were physically or/or sexually abused or profoundly neglected at very early age; they have a lot of trouble with trust and being able to love people in any healthy way. There is a tendency to see others as all black-and-white, with an intense love-hate attachment and fear of abandonment, it’s called lack of object constancy. The good news is, that according to Dr. Ramani, Borderline Personality Disorder is treatable, whereas with narcissism, there is little hope that they will ever seek help.

The Runner/ Chaser- A Classic Dance of a Narcissist and a Codependent

The recipient of a disordered person’s attack can experience confusion and crazy making. They will often receive dichotomous, mixed messages like: “I hate you, leave me alone, don’t leave me” all in one sentence. This is common and an expression of deep inner conflict, fear and wounding. When an unsuspecting, open and caring person encounters someone like this, the harm strikes really deep and it triggers any of the recipient’s unhealed abandonment issues. Also, the pain and hurt instigates any propensity to try to rescue and remedy the situation, almost to the point of compulsion. The compulsion comes because the narc/borderline was often so cruel and saw us in a dehumanizing, exceedingly negative light, and we strive to prove them wrong. This process, when someone takes away all of our dignity, value and power is nothing short of devastating. Now, none of us are labels, but there are some regular established patterns with certain maladaptive patterns that can help us all to contextualize and make sense of our experiences. These two videos below even though they’re cartoons, they perfectly encapsulate what a lot of us have been experiencing with these so called, twin flame connections. If any of this resonates, I urge you to listen to every word.

So, all of this forces us to assess the rich and colorful palette of narcissistic abuse which entails: hostility, projection, devaluing, discarding, stonewalling, ghosting and hoovering. These abusive games should not in the least, be of interest to a healthy person. It’s not some spiritual “twin flame runner and chaser” that is trying to find balance, it’s abuse, period.  An affirmation to let go of a hurtful “twin flame” might say:

“Thank you so much for letting me see myself, the fact that I feel that I’m lovable what I want and what I don’t and as it is, I’ll have to let you go. I would always care about you, and hoped it could’ve been different but without any change, insight, contrition or treatment, repeated unhealthy patterns are not sustainable. I hope to see you in the ‘next life,’ where we have a more healed, supportive, nurturing and whole existence.”

 

 


 

So, the question still stands… is the conflict of meeting someone and falling deeply into “love” (or codependency) and hurt like this, a true twin flame or is it just being confused/ conflated with narcissistic or some personality disordered abuse? My assessment from personal experience as of today, is that it’s both occurring simultaneously. One is the undercurrent of our karmic connections, propensities and childhood experiences. The other, meeting someone and feeling sense of familiarity and synchronicity that both breaks and opens you, that’s all real. There is a spiritual and karmic undercurrent of this whole process. However divine and absolute that is, as one expert in BPD, A.J. Mahari coins: “there is never an excuse for abuse.” We must also admit, the codependents that try to fix are often as wounded as the abusers, so it’s not about blame, is about healing, discrimination, healthy boundaries and manifesting genuine, healthy love. 

We must strive for and accept no less than healthy love, and here are some guidelines:

  • There is no physical, emotional or psychological abuse
  • You feel heard, cared for and respected
  • You are able to have open, honest communication, never any lies or games
  • You have skills to successfully resolve disagreements and conflict
  • You bring out the best in each other and support each other to flourish

If you are experiencing abuse, it’s never ok, please seek professional help and if the connection is untenable. It’s a facet of self care, self love and compassion, to leave toxic, destructive situations. The hope that people will magically change abusive patterns can be the most tragic loss of time, energy and our precious life. The mantra for empaths and codependents who wait and hope that it will get better with a narcissist, borderline or other untreated disordered person is:

NO HOPE
NO CHANGE

I was taught to never give up on anyone, and I to this day believe that with the proper support system, no one is irredeemable, if one were to get help. It’s just a sad truism that part of certain people’s disorder is to deny, not see their shortcomings and unhealed places, but rather blame everyone else, constantly, vehemently. The codependent in contrast, blames themselves and continually apologies and tries to rescue, desperately. It’s the quintessence of the “bad boy” attraction that many women have, or men who are attracted to “unattainable” withholding women. There is an intense drive to heal and fix, and “unite,” but this is the very definition of codependency. I think there is a longing also admittedly, to be valued and needed. What many learn the hard way, is that this task is perilous, it’s par with trying to get anyone to stop drinking. Change must come from within. There is a dangerous and toxic back and forth, damaging dynamic, that can go on for a lifetime between people with an untreated personality disorder and codependents, and no, it’s not a healthy, spiritual “twin flame.” No relationship is perfect, but we can get help or steer clear of ones that are harmful without resolve. Stay with healthy, loving people who see your light, and moreso, uncover it within yourself, for yourself and then shine.

Wellness to all,
Dawn Boiani-Sandberg

“The dharma means seeing things clearly, as they are”

Owner Buddhistmala.com


Photo Credit Dante’s Inerno, artist: James de Villiers
Johannesburg
https://www.artworkarchive.com/profile/james-de-villiers/news/dante-s-inferno
I’ve a wide-ranging interest in the arts from painting and drawing to music composition as well as science. My art deals with the primal forces of nature.

Love (again) in the Age of Corona

With our recent days of social isolation, we have looked more and more online and to social media for connection, to work, and stay in touch with family and friends. A lot of us now live in these virtual worlds a good part of the day. What we always must remember is that the founders of social media sites like Facebook and Twitter researched and utilized methods to make these platforms become as addictive as possible to users. They carefully researched the stimulus response design from slot machines and the baiting of time delayed, anticipation-reward, that has been used to have people become highly addicted to gambling.

So, if one already has any propensity for addiction or loneliness or simply too much time on their hands, any of us can fall prey to becoming addicted to the internet namely, any social media platform. I’ve seen friends spend countless hours per day, even myself, online having long discussions with people about political or philosophical things or posting things to become attention seeking. I fear that a lot of our healthy relationships are being traded for wanting these Facebook or Instagram “likes” where we get, a Pavlovian chemical bump of confirmation, in a time where all of us feel estranged and alone. I’m concerned about the healthiness of this trajectory in our society and with our children; we all spend way too much time in social media or on computer games or “working.” I feel that our overall general health flourishing and welfare is affected by these electronic milieus. One of my Facebook friends said “on my deathbed I’m sure I’m going to regret not having spent enough time on Facebook.” So I’d like to consider really looking at the addictiveness of the internet and social media, and how it can exacerbate any propensity that we have for addiction especially attention seeking and love addiction.

The Internet Exacerbates Love Addiction, Codependency and Unhealthy Attachments

It is natural and healthy to long for intimate connections. Oftentimes, because of unprocessed grief, hurt in past relationships and lingering childhood wounds, many find healthy, sustainable relationships to be a difficult and daunting task. Perhaps we have some kind of deep trauma or betrayal in our past, like parents involved with a traumatic divorce, or neglect, and these wounds are to this day, unresolved. Memory doesn’t really have a time limit, therefore we keep acting out of broken patterns. As adults we can choose individuals who are emotionally unavailable or people that we have to “fix,” a mirror resonant with our own broken hearts. It happens unconsciously, we seek to correct the pain of these unresolved past wounds, that occurred if we were young, often pre-concept, so they are by nature, hard to access. Some of us may even have been abused  physically, emotionally or verbally, and therefore have difficulty discriminating. We can choose unreliable people and can not sustain any trust. If we felt undesired, unloved as children and teens, we can recreate a rejection propensity called “trauma reenactment,” and wind up feeling rejected, yet again, by these inaccessible partners.

Painful experiences that are unhealed become repeated pessimistic thoughts, negative emotions and then behaviors, which become the constructs of a poorly functioning self. Abandonment or neglect, early on, can result in codependency and addiction to, well, anything. Love addiction is highly seductive, because we really do flourish in relationship, and long to connect as part of our emotional, human, survival. There are strong chemicals released in the brain that encourages passionate love, like endorphins, oxytocin and phenylethylalanine. When we fall in love, there is a spike of phenylethylalanine, (a.k.a. the ‘love molecule’) you could say we get addicted to our own brain chemistry. The same is triggered in social media when someone “likes” what you post. We can be unconsciously driven into cycles of obsession and pursuing the object of our desire, one person obsessively, or Facebook “friends,” but you see, none of this love is real or healthy. This toxic pattern of love and internet addiction pushes real people, family and healthy relationships away, and we isolate more, and become sadly more lonely, even with tremendous effort to remedy it. Ah, the tragic face of addiction, and this one, internet and social media addiction is rampant and ubiquitous these days.

We can continue this unhealthy cycle over and over again, which generates the exact same painful emotions we may have had in youth: abandonment, fear, anger, pain, emptiness and notably loneliness. Love addicts often exacerbate this, by choosing someone who’s emotionally unavailable. Another facet of love addiction is actually, someone who is love avoidant. Yes, cue the noble Buddhist renunciation “path.” According to Pia Mellody, author of Facing Love Addiction, love avoidance is the systematic use of blocking and escape techniques to prevent intimacy. We can prevent vulnerability and intimacy by creating intensity outside the relationship, normally with a few other unhealthy addictions, like sex, gambling, alcohol or drugs. The term codependency is used so often and many of us don’t really understand what that means. It means basically that people are your drug of choice. We feel broken, unwell and lonely, and we look to someone outside of ourselves to make us feel better and to define our self worth.

Love avoidants were frequently enmeshed with a clinging parent of the opposite gender. The love avoidant has an intense fear of being suffocated, overwhelmed or engulfed. They are inclined to stay in relationships usually from obligation or guilt rather than love. The love addict’s neediness, joined together with the love avoidant’s core wound, would cause that relationship to be dysfunctional and break down. There is often a perfect toxic pairing of an addict with a codependent, a push me-pull you, runner, chaser and fixer. Each person is, covertly wounded and unwell, and in need of real self care and healing, independent of the relationship, or even the internet for that matter! This dynamic can repeat again and again, and make having a sustainable connection with another nearly impossible. The problem is, if we are either addicted or avoidant neither one has well-adjusted relationship skills that result in becoming a well functioning, happy person. We can put a huge amount of effort, days, weeks, years or an entire lifetime, into becoming happy through these maladaptive ways, like searching for internet likes and e-connections, and windup having a fragmented, broken, lonely and a fundamentally unsatisfactory life.

Mindfulness tips to assist us to create real, healthy, loving relationships:

1. Health– make a choice to become as happy and healthy as we can be, in mind, body and spirit. That inner and outer shine as well authentic mental and emotional health, is a genuine love magnet! Walk outside, fresh air and sunshine, they say 10,000 steps a day!

2. Conscious Eating– The right foods, exercises and supplements may go a considerable way in promoting the healthful new you! Find out about possible food sensitivities and have your blood sugar checked. Food sensitivities, gluten intolerance, vitamin deficiencies and insulin resistance lead to mood swings and/or nervousness.

3. Feed your Heart and Soul. Limit internet and social media time to no more than 1-2 hours a day! A spiritual practice like mantra, prayer, inspiring reading, poetry or yoga soothes us to be at peace. Silent sitting and mindfulness meditation has been shown to bring calmness and can alter our brain waves and decrease hypertension and heart strain. Healthy, loving relationships provide relaxation, comfort and needed healthy chemicals like oxytocin from touch. Cherish people that care, really listen and want the best for us. Discriminating who is healthy for us and letting go of those who are not, is extremely healing and also an essential step towards being fulfilled and intimate, in a rewarding way with others.

4. Bring light to our Self Doubt. Negative self talk and pessimistic thoughts could be hindering our whole life. These are negative programs which have been running subconsciously since we were young, and can be very deep, and hard to access. Such beliefs as, “I am not lovable, I am not important, or I am unattractive” affect what we will manifest into our lives. Pay honest attention and write down all negative self beliefs and guilt about past actions on a paper. Then, burn that paper with a candle, releasing old patterns that no longer serve. You can use an affirmation, like “I am lovable, I am whole, I forgive myself for all past mistakes.”

5. Lastly and above all, learn to really love yourself. Addiction and maladaptive patterns just can’t survive with the power and efficacy of true self care, warmth and self respect. We cannot expect others to love us if we do not love ourselves, nor can we love anyone in excess of our self love. Hold our heart, hug a pillow and cry, release any old painful “knots.” We may find it necessary to get support. I have sought help many times, and challenge to myself to go as deep as I can, explore some of the hidden patterns from a wounded past and youth. Very deep things can clear like a cloud vanishing, and it doesn’t have to take years.

There are also free, online meet ups and support groups like: CODA, Love Addicts Anonymous, AlAnon, and Adult Children that can help with codependency, love, media or any addiction. We also might consider mindfulness awareness programs. Programs like mindfulness based relapse prevention shows a lot of promise with negative pattern redirection. In addition, web and app based mindfulness recovery programs work well. For instance, the Craving to Quit app provides an excellent mindfulness training which was developed at Yale University, and offers a connection to virtual community where individuals may get peer and expert support.  Let’s all take this downtime to unplug more, feel whole, refresh, shine light on shadow patterns and restart life anew, to find real love and healthy, meaningful relationships. That would indeed be, something to “like.”

Warmth and wellness to all, always,
Dawn Boiani-Sandberg

Owner Buddhistmala.com


Meditation woman photo: https://pixabay.com/users/leninscape-2892621/

“We have to connect with and find strength in our own Buddha Nature,
This is not copyrighted by any Lama or Buddha or Bodhisattva
There are many great things within us and in our world,
qualities of warmth, wisdom

even the Buddha’s monks
from the onset, had misconduct here and there
don’t fixate and reify the negative, impure things

relax and have compassion
stay with what is light
the bad things, we work to change them

don’t let all of this shake you deep down
we all have Buddha Nature
keep what is positive, light

take in to our heart, identify with all good qualities
the bad you see shouldn’t ruin your life or Dharma practice

The Bodhisattvas never get pulled down into
depression or hopelessness, they keep their vows

if we are wrecked and upset by the darkness we see
it ruins our life, depression and our core practice

we can’t help the world if we are broken
stay with positive qualities within us and in our world

when things seem dark
always stay with and train in

“the light.” 


Formatted transcript/ excerpts of a personal teaching to me from Tsoknyi Rinpoche, when I was feeling sad and overwhelmed.